Hey, it’s the weekend come a day early! (for most readers I hope) Let’s do some drinking and watching and say pithy/funny things to one another.
Book Report:
So I was somewhat intrigued by the description of Beat The Devils-it’s an alt-history noir-ish mystery thingy whereby Joe McCarthy is elected president and his hatred of Jews, gays and Commies is given free rein. It is so close to being a good book, you can feel it as you read it that the plot needs to be in the hands of a more experienced writer-one that doesn’t feature outlandish plot twists, Humphrey Bogart as an intelligence officer and a silly, incomprehensible ending. Ah well, they can’t all be winners.
There’s an ESPN headline out there- “Jayden Daniels honors teammate with cancer on Pro Day”. A few observations…
-That particular ability was never mentioned by scouts as a part of his skillset.
-I hope it was one of those slow-growth ones.
-Did he like or hate this guy?
-Reminds me of the time I tried to gift an ex with a severe allergic reaction.
Covid Years, Covid. Whop, whop, whop:
The average age of the UNC Tar Heels starting five is 22.2. The average age of the starting five of the Okie Thunder is 22.6.
Speaking of, there’s Sweet Sixteen ball on-To The Games!
Clemson/Arizona:
The Cats are favored by 6.5 which seems about right. The Tigers finished just two games over .500 in conference play and had a fortuitous draw.
SDSU/UConn:
No one is playing better than the Trust Fundamentals, led by the fiery passion of Hurley’s Throbbing Temple Vein. San Diego’s D might befuddle their opponent for a little while but UConn is so flexible in the way that they can attack teams that it’ll just take a bit of time.
BAMA/UNC:
There’s almost nothing to like about either of these squadoos but at least the Tide hasn’t had a scandal since that hiding a gun kerfuffle two years ago.
Illinois/ISU:
This one’s for all the corn and Truck Nutz! The only thing I know about either team is that the Cyclones look to create havoc on D and when they win the turnover battle they are 28-3.
Do your thing.
[redacted]
Trent Green responded to both your comment and Brick’s because each comment was the first one he remembered seeing.
Trent Green is a bottomless fount of jokes.
“I sure am!!”
Trent Green, using a public fountain to bath himself.
“[Terrence Shannon, Jr.] is unbelievable!”
That’s certainly true. In fact I’d say he’s unique. I’m not aware of any other player in the NCAA tournament who’s only playing because his attorneys got a restraining order to keep his school from benching him while he delays facing allegations of sexual assault.
Goddamn allegedly felonious unicorn is what that kid is.
His uncle is Trent Green!
Trent Green: “Huh?”
This guy was cool.
https://youtu.be/Vy2vLDlTZq4?si=FNUm0RUF6mndwba4
So that was… something?
So it’s gonna be Alabama vs. Clemson yet again. College sports is too predictable, man.
Illinois vs Iowa State is pretty close and petty entertaining. Lots of missed shots that lead to lots of possession changes.
25 point game with 5 minutes left.UConn gets the winner. I’m sort of hoping it’s Illinois, simply because it seems like a 50-50 chance Illinois’s best player will get himself jailed by Saturday.
No ties or lead changes in the Ill/ISU game. YET!
Nelson finishes the game with a blocked shot.
Wow, same way he finished at Trafalgar!
That’s one way of putting it.
RJ Davis saying that “The ACC runs through me” and then coming up short in the ACC Tournament and the Sweet Sixteen would just be hilarious.
I swear I had no idea the NCAA tourney was playing in DTLA.
And I WORK in DTLA!
You are so L.A.
https://twitter.com/LilBonaX/status/1773529981970211034
THE American University (Washington DC) – 0
“Holy Shit, Nelson!”
-Me
-Also, the French and Spanish fleets during the Battle of Trafalgar
“urk, gurgle”
-Nelson at Trafalgar, in response
This game slaps.
Man, if you told me a white guy was leading Alabama to glory I’d assume they were segregating the schools again.
“Love this game! So many ties!”
-M. Hutchence
You (Ignorant, not familiar with NCAA Tournament history): “Say, Alabama isn’t much of a college basketball program. What must have happened for them to have ever advanced past the Sweet Sixteen even once?”
Me (Smart, handsome, familiar with NCAA Tournament history): Oh that’s easy.
Bama/Tar Fucks is a great game. No idea who is going to pull this out.
Bodies everywhere, no defense whatsoever, some guy running around on a busted heel while shot up on Toradol.
If I didn’t know better I’d say this was an NFL game.
Stan Van Gundy seems like kind of a douche. They’re college kids, Stan, not pros.
Republican nutbag stirring up the rubes-three buses full of Gonzaga players are actually immigrants flown into Michigan by the governor.
https://twitter.com/matthewmaddock/status/1773143040724451761
He’s been called out multiple times in the comments and keeps replying “OK kommie”
Brain worms are a terrible thing.
I remember when we didn’t have to listen to chuds like this, because they were locked away in asylums. Thanks, Reagan. Motherfucker.
I like to know which is the Self-Assured Retard Party.
THIS IOWA STATE DEFENSE I CALL IT A CO-ED AT THE JAYHAWK DINER, BECAUSE TERENCE SHANNON, JR JUST PENETRATED IT WITHOUT PERMISSION!!!
Dig the Boondocks tattoo on NC#4.
Alabama with the ol’ “hit ’em in the balls” defense.
The pace is insane.
That Sears kid is so much quicker than anyone on Carolina.
THIS ALABAMA TEAM I CALL THEM THE AWKWARD COUSIN AFTER THREE MOONSHINES AT THE FAMILY REUNION, BECAUSE THEY ARE PUTTING UP NO DEFENSE!!!
-might need to workshop this one.
Also, Death, taxes, and Arizona being overseeded.
It never fails.
Jesus, UConn played a B- game and just waxed SDSU by 30.
Fortunately UConn fans are well-bred folk who aren’t* letting this success go to their heads and becoming ever more obnoxious.
*Oh, we very much are.
No Hell darker than having to rely on sommet good out of Alabammy. G’night to all y’all.
“Hey, fuck you, buddy!” – Doug Jones
I was happy I got to vote for him.
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=FWer4JeA4OQhttps://www.youtube.com/watch?si=MKUQphe_E5jLb9TQ&v=FWer4JeA4OQ
.
That is nightmare fuel.
.
Re: the Bama/UNC preview above-
“TONIGHT, WE ARE ALL COUSINFUCKERS” was just sitting there and I missed it.
Turns out Frank Zappa was Jesus!
That dude is way too white to have been Jesus.
Doesn’t even have his signature corn rows smh
“Why does it hurt when I proselytize?”
“What was all that about not going where the huskies go?”
During sermon on the mount
You ain’t gonna get an argument out of me.
These Fightin’ Blax, I call them a kid off his ADHD meds because they just could not BEAR DOWN.
Fire Country is gonna be the name of Oumar Ballo’s dormatory tonight.
Clem can ball.
That was an all-or nothing three. Wow. Ballsy.
Carlton Banks fears no man.
If you’re stupid enough to believe Coach K, you should go die for my freedoms.
The last 5 minutes of this Zona/Clemson game is sponsored by the good folks at Bad Decisions Jeans
“…and so even though I don’t remember the details very well, I’m going to make a reference to the SNL sketch anyways.” – scotchnaut
Rikki, you ignorant slattern. I just wanted to…jump, you up!
Fire Country will be good viewing.
Mike Bidwill’s sexuality aside…
“It’s a legit intramural team at clemson!”
Wow. I thought rec league naming conventions were typically quite strict.
Opening Day is the best day to Release the Kraken!!!!
PJ Hall is such a white player.
he jus’ believes in STATES RIGHTS obvs
During sex, the buffalo head stays on
They’ve another by name of Joe Girard. He can do nothing, nothing but shoot the three and he has to be schemed open to do it.
I apologize Blax that I bet on your Cats. Sonora dog on me tomorrow.
But please, Bear down.
Perhaps some signs of Light Bearing Down?
Oh and I’m always one to eat my emotions!
I’m heading to St Elmo’s steakhouse in Indianapolis next month. Given all the Indy fat jokes we make, I have high expectations.
Be sure to try the gravy flight.
I thought every plane that flies to Indianapolis is called a gravy flight.
Ask to be taken to the fattest man in the restaurant, for he will be their King.
Fuck off, I’m full.
I’ll be there a week from Tuesday. There will be a full report.
Cats seem like the better team but Clemson is playing mistake-free ball.
College basketball doesn’t matter….
all about them DiamondBLAX now, eh?
Funny, that.
Litre: What’s the plan tomorrow?
Blax: We yell for Ken Kendrick to deliver a World Series or Move the Team.
Tell everyone y’all meet that Litre is in town on behalf of the One World Government, to establish sanctuary cities.
The Dirt Stillers are undefeated.
Ohio River Series for the NL Pennant. Stop the count, er vote.
Sorry. Copied pasted from Trump’s manifesto.
Bless your heart.
I’m hungry.
My kids *hate* that joke as I use it all the time
If June 1 is Bobby Bonilla Day, can 3/28 be Frinkman Dat?
Blax asked last thread when the CATS were last behind. Well, teh answer is NOW, Mister Man!!
They really started out cold. At least they’re playing defense.
Arizonny is giving a helping hand with the multiple airballs.
https://www.instagram.com/p/C4kb8-nR3Ay/?igsh=MW9ubmx6OWJ3Z3dyaQ==
ROLL DAMN TIDE!!!!