Hello there fellow DFO’er. Hope you’re well today. And thanks for coming back to see last weeks tl;dr of last week as decided by my brain. There’s no reason as to why some comments make it and others don’t. Seriously. There isn’t.
This weeks cheesy motivational quote is:
It is the man’s own mind, not his enemy or foe, that lures him to evil ways [in bed].
Buddha
remember folks have a safe word and a consenting partner. Or just turn off the phone and go the fuck to sleep. Think either work here.
As a reminder, Sunday comments stand alone and Monday comments will go on the next week’s post.
Note that during the offseason, I’ll probably look at the Sunday posts.
Without further ado, here are the comments of the week.
Ah, Monday. Other than 5pm, Hippo’s thoughts are the highlight of the day.
ArmedandHammered
Gumbygirl
Sirianni should be fired. litre_pug makes better decisions and he is a knucklehead.
litre_cola
I support litre pug’s bid to be coach, though will be difficult for him to hold a clipboard without thumbs
Doktor Zymm
I feel as though the Giants put a band aid on a huge gaping wound with their win over the Browns.
scotchnaut
And THIS GUY knows about gaping wounds!
LemonJello
The Bengals Defense couldn’t stop a leaf falling off a tree from hitting the ground.
Redshirt
Doesn’t have to hit the ground…
WCS
Thanks to Terry and Buffalo D, I’m now 0-3 in Freezer Vodka.
Sharkbait
“We welcome you to the Lowratio League. Lowatio League. Lowratio League.”
LemonJello
Brocky
DAMAR HAMLIN WITH A HEART-STOPPING INTERCEP…
Horatio Cornblower
Can we still make fun of him?
Redshirt
Our moral high ground might be a little shaky, but I’ll allow it.
Sharkbait
Not to beat a dead horse (which the BUF/JAX match very closely resembled) but Buffalo treated Jacksonville like one of those stupid tourists in Yellowstone National Park last night.
https://i.chzbgr.com/full/7497939968/hB12629A3/this-buffalo-is-not-in-the-mood-for-pictures
LemonJello
LemonJello
Greetings from Crooklyn! YEEEEEEAAAAH
Don T
I don’t want to say Buffalo abused Jacksonville last night, but Janae Rice apologized for her part in what happened on national tv.
LemonJello
Also, the Jags D had so much trouble reading plays that I though Lea Michele was their coordinator.
LemonJello
NYC Mayor Eric Adams has been indicted, which is awesome because he seems like a genuine prick. I wonder how long it will be before he’s “diagnosed” with Parkinson’s disease?
Oh, and fuck Brett Favre and Phil Bryant with a rusty nail file.
Horatio Cornblower
Who fucking puts on a wedding on a Sunday? Even worse, it’s gonna keep me from watching the Ravens. fucking so dumb
jjfozz
You’re typing like you’re coming down with Covid. Please don’t be selfish and attend the wedding.
SonOfSpam
So sexy
Doktor Zymm
Alright Al’s. Back on track.
2Pack
I said nothing, when they came for the Golden State Warriors, because I was not a fan;
I said nothing, when they came for the Oakland Raiders, because I was not an ex-con;
I said nothing, when they came for the Oakland Seals, because they played in the Pacific time zone, the worst of all time zones.
So when they came for the Oakland A’s, there was no one lest to say anything.
herodotus450
Oakland Raiders fans are pretty experienced at exercising their right to remain silent.
Rikki-Tikki-Deadly
Is Eli allowed to watch his old team play or does it get him all revved up and too wired to sleep?
jjfozz
Gentlemen, I am in one of mankind’s most feared social situations:
At a wedding, by myself, where I hardly know anyone not in the wedding party
The alcohol, is not one of my preferred spirits
Brocky
I’m going to ask the important question: Are you wearing red and black?
Gumbygirl
the boy’s a tiiiiiimmmmme booooommmmmb!
King Hippo
Some husband and wife duo dropped by unannounced-they didn’t get the memo that wifey and I (more so me) are very private folks. Does the husband have the balls to come up and visit me in my lair? I’m guessing no.
Wifey’s Sister [Christmas get-together 2022]: “People think that because of what you both do that you’re both intimidating figures.”
Me/Wifey: [look at each other] “Whaaa…?”
scotchnaut
Wait…your wife shares your, uh, “hobby”?
Rikki-Tikki-Deadly
the couple that slays together STAYS together ppl forget that
King Hippo
So I go to Saturday evening mass, to make Mrs. Fozz happy.
Yes, we went to the church I hate.
I got in the car, fired up Spotify and first song to come up: Slayer – Angel of Death. I cranked that fucker leaving the church parking lot.
jjfozz
Ladies and gentlemen.
I
Have a date.
November 2nd.
Not just a date.
A date with the woman that I could spend the rest of my life with.
Think I shared before about being engaged in a very long term arrangement.
Her youngest daughter is going off to college and this will be our first date in 14 years?
She always said that when her girls grew up and shit got less complicated we would reset.
That is this.
Holy shit!
I have a date!
yeah right
Groper Cleveland just trying to force the play. Can’t seem to take “no” for an answer.
LemonJello
Just finished walking 60 miles around Denver over the last three days to raise money to fight breast cancer. AMA.
BrettFavresColonoscopy
THIS DERRICK HENRY LEMME TELL YA I CALL HIM THE WHITE MAN BECAUSE HE IS KILLING ALL THE BUFFALO
fleshwound_NPG
Rex would be proud with that going deep throw
Sharkbait
Truly, The Dragon was unleashed.
BeefReeferLives
Bengals Defense watching this game to check out next week’s opponent:
Redshirt
Optimized the placement of my hammock chair!
Doktor Zymm
This is why she’s a Doktorb, folks.
WCS
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Thanks for all the comments and funny and everything else.
Stay busy and safe out there.
NOTE banner image from here
Hey, I slapped together a post on the current standings in Freezer Vodka and Lowratio Leagues.
I’ll let others more knowledgeable in the inner workings of WordPress to publish it.
when did you want it to go live?
No preference, I just didn’t want to step on any other posts.
tis live now
Thought Gumby Girl might like a picture of the Cult, then and now.
You’re welcome Cara.
They still seem to like each other after all these years. That’s pretty rare, good for them!
Was just at a hipster coffee shop at Sky Harbor. Chatted briefly with some old ladies. They’re heading back home to the Midwest from the Big Island (in Hawaii). They said it’s patriotic to book trips to the islands right now because The Economy and it’s a value now.
I had to agree.
Hippo should use Brocky’s Hippo with Jesus pic for his Monday recaps. Its calming after a tough Sunday of games.
Sensational hustle here GTD.
These are always great, aren’t they? GTD is an international treasure!
Reds Fans: (sniff) “Good night, Charlie Hustle.”
Everyone Else: “Hey! When did Kinsella open a Casino?!”
“Just finished walking 60 miles around Denver over the last three days to raise money to fight breast cancer. AMA.
BrettFavresColonoscopy”
For reasons that should be obvious, this week I’ll be walking 60 miles to help out Parkinson’s disease.
“Is someone walking 60 miles? I’m in!”
-yeah right
Thanks for including me despite being largely AWOL these last few days. Makes me feel even worse for fat fingering a four star rating.
Freezer Vodka standings are in Media Library!
Call me Leicester City. Because after winning it all, I’m going down immediately.
It’s really quite amazing how the teams are spread out…
Couch Fuckers FC need to get their ass in gear and start winning like the other couch lovin’ teams
THIS SHARKBAIT I CALL HIM THE MIDNIGHT WISPS BECAUSE…
…Well they did the same thing.