JV NFL for 23 Nov 2004 (Late)

In case you enjoyed the early slate and would like even more JV NFL:

Army (+14.5) v. Notre Dame @ Damn YankeesVille (7:00, NBC)

I wish I had a better piece of shade to throw at Yankee Stadium.  My brain is borken, just deal.

Washington State (-12.5) at Oregon State (7:00, CW)

Too bad we, as a society, are no longer worthy of cheerleader banner pics.  Anyway, 2-PAC title is on the line, though Nice Beaver would not even become Bowl eligible with a win/title.

Alabama (-13.5) at Oklahoma (7:30, ABC)

We think that Roll Damn Tide has grown past their attention span troubles, and should beat the Okies.  Then again, pending HHS nominee would say THAT IS JUST WHAT TEH JEWS WANT U 2 THINK!!!1111

Texas A&M (-2.5) at Auburn (7:30, ESPN)

Oh God, if Bonfire Cult blows their clear title game shot (home to Steerfuckers South) next week, by looking past lowly War Damn Eagle.  Hilarity ensues.

Vanderbilt (+8) at LSU (7:45, SECN)

Oh God, the deliciousness of a potential Brian Kelly Death Valley Night Fixture loss…to fucking Vandy???

Troi Boiz (-4.5) “at” Westwood Klavern (10:30, NBC)

Remember when this game mattered, for anything other than minor Bowl eligibility.  Pepperidge Farm scratches its head.  OK, and balls.

 

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King Hippo
Reclusive, vulgar Broncos fan. Also a proud fookin' Evertonian. Likely dropped on my head repeatedly as a small child. [Insert George Carlin quote followed by thoughtful nod.]
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Gumbygirl
litre_cola

These broads rock, Hippo approved.

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Zd9jeJk2UHQ

yeah right

I’m going to put my headphones on right now.

Thank you.

yeah right

Workshopping ideas for next seasons Sunday Gravy

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WCS

Grilled California with a side of mashed Danny Boy?

yeah right

I should give some background.

This is my only personally drawn graffiti.
Two months ago.

That’s on the Shankill side of the “Peace” wall in Belfast, Northern Ireland.

Our catholic driver gave us whatever we wanted to tag the protestant side of that wall.

You got spray cans?
Yep.
Got paint?
Yep?
Got guns?
Gimme 15.

Fucking Belfast right before they clanged the gate for the night.

yeah right

Soggy day in Temple Bar.

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ArmedandHammered

Been there!

WCS

Sad night aided by whatever coke-fueled bender allowed for F1 to be raced at this time in Vegas.

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litre_cola

This Irish Whisky has stopped my writing for tomorrow. All I know is Spam can get rammed but a tush push

SonOfSpam

My Anteaters are playing their next game in someplace called Lethbridge. I assume it’s a dank pit full of hosers.

yeah right

Watch out for the killy rammer!

litre_cola

The windy city!

Seriously, I am from Winnipeg which is windy as Chicago but Lethbridge is insane. Also full of Mormons and Indigenous. Add some oil workers and you got yourself dysfunctional madness,

Redshirt

If I became a pilot, I would so cut the lights to the cabin and sing the Wonka Tunnel Song over the PA on every flight.

Willy Wonka Tunnel Song

Senor Weaselo

I should tell my pilot friend about this idea!

Brick Meathook

My high school graduation ceremony was in this building, on the main stage. It’s the Shrine of the Immaculate Conception in Northeast Washington DC, and is the largest church in North America. This is not to be confused with the Washington Cathedral across town, which later during college I spent six weeks inside of filming a time-lapse movie of the stained glass windows

https://ibb.co/0GX9shk

the main stage:

https://ibb.co/JH9xYpk

litre_cola

Looks like Sacre Coeur in Montmartre, Paris. My favoUrite arrondissement in Paris no question.

SonOfSpam

One of the few cool places I’ve actually been. The church was amazing and so was the ham and cheese sandwich I had afterwards. Something like a Croak Mon Sure.

litre_cola

The artist ghetto around it is unreal.

Brick Meathook

I searched the internet for a photo of a nuclear submarine engineroom. Few if any of those photos exist, and I don’t have one even though I was there.

Google gave me this, even though it’s actually the Missile Compartment Upper Level. This is where we stored our 16mm movies and also our world-ending Trident warheads.

https://ibb.co/FWmvvcR

SonOfSpam

4 out of 5 dentists prefer sugarless warheads for patients who splode warheads.

yeah right

We should have drinks.

SonOfSpam

SOON

Brick Meathook

Skipper: GODAMMIT! We just launched Ernest Goes to Camp!

Weapons Officer: We still have Ernest Goes to Jail. It’s missing one reel though.

Skipper: Well, I guess that’s better than nothing. Carry on, men.

https://ibb.co/FY9mndQ

Unsurprised

I would hope you couldn’t find that online.

Although War Thunder alone has produced dumber situations.

yeah right

My high school graduation took place on a dry lake bed in China Lake California.

We did have a USAF flyby in my mind.

Redshirt

Rivalry Games should be color on color, if feasible.

WCS

something something Nick Fuentes

WCS

You should be able to downvote your own comments.

Unsurprised

Bad kitty!

SonOfSpam

Yeah, when Carroll and Neuheisel agreed to that 20+ years ago, it was a great (obvious) idea. Plus the Bruins-Trojans unis are classic.

scotchnaut
Gatoraids
scotchnaut
Redshirt

Time for me to check the Alabama score and…

You folks got a towel?

WCS

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litre_cola

Hippo and I were texting that this is perfect for complete chaos. I will argue to the death that the 12 team playoff is so much better.

ballsofsteelandfury

I still prefer 16

litre_cola

MOAR madness. Here for it.

jjfozz

Dog gets into trash.

I yell at dog.

Dog starts growling at me.

Dog goes into crate.

Continues to growl.

“WELL YOU CAN FUCK RIGHT OFF! I HOUSE AND FEED YOU!”

“Fozz, are you yelling at one of the kids?”

“NO! I’M YELLING AT THE DOG I SWEAR TO CHRIST I’M GOING TO KILL HER!”

“Fozz, don’t take the Lord’s name in vain.”

Me, in a whisper to the dog, “Swear to God, I’m going to murder you.” Pour a glass of bourbone.

blaxabbath

I love my dog too.

jjfozz

Middle Fozz has homecoming dance.

His date seems nice.

She walks into kitchen, looks at my wife and says, “Hey. Can I get a tampon?”

Wife goes to get her a tampon.

“Can you believe she asked that?”

“Well, at least she won’t get pregnant.”

I should not talk.

Horatio Cornblower

Could’ve been worse, could’ve walked in and just immediately said “who do I gotta blow to get a tampon around here?”

jjfozz

Silver lining? Not to be a prude, but my son’s friend’s date walked in wearing a dress that would shame Madonna.

ballsofsteelandfury

Barely wearing?

ballsofsteelandfury

That means Middle Fozz is going ass tonight!

jjfozz

You are my fucking hero.

litre_cola

I am writing tomorrow night’s game preview. Suck it, Spam. Go Birds.

What would anyone like to learn about wine? Q and A if you will.
I will read them in the morning and answer them in there tomorrow. If no one has questions, I will make them up.

jjfozz

Wine question: “How do people not know that Ernest and Julio Gallo red mixed with Sprite is what made me the person I am today?”

Yup, my grandfather would make those for us kids every Sunday. Luckily, it had no effect on me.

litre_cola

We had 2 litres up here growing up called California Coolers, no shame in that. I reckon they would be your equivalent to Mad Dogs.

ballsofsteelandfury

We had California Coolers in California. We also had Bartles & James.

SonOfSpam

There will be RAMMMMMMMMMING

blaxabbath

How the hell do i utilize a wine list? Those fucks know I don’t know anything about these names/years!

litre_cola

Tune in tomorrow

ballsofsteelandfury

Wine question:

Why do they use the word “dry” to describe a wet product?

Also, what is “dry” in this context supposed to mean?

litre_cola

Tune in tomroow

ballsofsteelandfury

We’re all here for the real game (USC-UCLA), right?

BrettFavresColonoscopy

I’ve been watching Spirit-Pride

litre_cola

Is that a Trans v LGB hooligan dustup? I would have no idea who to put my money on in that one.

litre_cola

I am! As it will lead into F1!

WCS

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Redshirt
SonOfSpam

GO BRUINS

Yes this is the only game

Redshirt

I’m just enjoying a Bungals-free week. Even JV Cincinnati shitting the bed and rolling around with it isn’t ruining my vacation.

Horatio Cornblower

I’m just here so I don’t get fined.

WCS

Hug your loved ones. Let them know you love them.

jjfozz

Since my dad died, I’ve hugged a lot of people. The girls down at the Passion Pit, well, they don’t like getting hugged.

WCS

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Keep your hands to yourself.

litre_cola

I thought that the Sam Darnold mono info graphic was good but this is just awesome on so many levels.

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ballsofsteelandfury

Position: Doggie

litre_cola

Reverse cowgirl? Like a false 9

Redshirt

That would help with her core.

Redshirt

Trump: “SEE?! OUR ARMY IS LOSING TO A BUNCH OF LEPRECHAUNS?! OUR MILITARY IS WOKE AND WEAK!!”

Aide: “Mr. President, the election is over. You’ve won. Can’t you ever be happy with your accomplishments?”

Trump (starting to tear up): “…no.”

Unsurprised

That would be totally on brand for Trump to call Army a bunch of losers.

Every story of him telling the military they are losers is funnier than the last.

WCS

Why does Notre Dame HAET TEH TRUPES

Redshirt

Trump was right! The foreign Irish are destroying the US Army!

Unsurprised

No one tell him about 1863

Redshirt

Nice to see JV Cincy is…just there.

Brocky

Finish the quote:

I haven’t been this disappointed in the army since…..

Doktor Zymm

They named their special forces ‘rangers’ instead of something good like ‘pants ferrets’

herodotus450

The Battle of Montreal?

Gatoraids

next year

Redshirt

They watched the Capital be invaded on January 6th and went “My God! Someone oughta do something!”

Senor Weaselo

Well, at long last I can finally start playing that Humble Bundle with Burnout Paradise that my friend got me for my birthday!

In 2013.

Doktor Zymm

I played a bunch of Squirrel with a Gun today. Super fun game

Unsurprised

AKA Peanut’s Revenge

Doktor Zymm

For every ridiculous product that exists, someone has to make it. Somewhere there are people who work in a factory making unsanctioned Hello Kitty vibrating nipple clamps, someone who designed them, someone who funded the whole operation

litre_cola

Do they come in an unmarked package?

SonOfSpam

No, but if you have a retired shut-in neighbor, you can make do.

litre_cola

NeighboUr’s wife hates me because I smoke weed in my yard.
Other neighboUr’s name is Deb, is 65, likes to get hight too. I don’t need to know Deb’s fetishist.

blaxabbath

It’s a strange world indeed.

Unsurprised

Seeing b-roll or older Latinas in L.A. making giant multi-ethnic dildos is one of the most American things ever.

Senor Weaselo

I wish I had a better piece of shade to throw at Yankee Stadium. My brain is borken, just deal.

NYCFC has the most recent championship won by a team that calls Yankee Stadium home.

litre_cola

Become a futbol fan!

Last edited 1 month ago by litre_cola
Senor Weaselo

I think that’s enough of a reason for people to root for NYCFC for the potential sentence of “NYCFC has won more championships calling this version of Yankee Stadium home than the Yankees.”

SonOfSpam

They’re trying their damnedest not to

ballsofsteelandfury

Bullshit. We are always worthy of cheerleader pics. Specially Cougarettes.

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ballsofsteelandfury

I am scratching both my head and my balls

WCS

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litre_cola

He’s a witch!

Burn him! Burrrn him!

Downfield Matriculator

Just here to be mildly excited that Cal has defeated Stanford in a classic Atlantic Coast Conference tilt! Also bowl eligible (Is the Poulan Weedeater bowl still a thing?). Should have beaten Miami but for BLEERGH so rivalry game win will have to do.

WCS

Sparky-Big Love has gone beyond plaid and into the NetherRealm.

litre_cola

Was fuxking superb. A little nervy in the 4th I will admit.

WCS
Senor Weaselo
Last edited 1 month ago by Senor Weaselo