Welcome back one and all. We’ve got six playoff games and all have some sort of appeal. Let’s get to it.
Chargers/Texans:
-Houston’s only quality win was vs Buffalo and that was quite some time ago. There’s just something missing from the team this year and I can’t put my finger on it. Coach Ryan needs to get the attention of his players for this tilt.
-Myself, I’m thinking that the Chargers will be the only road team to win this weekend.
-Although they don’t have any ‘difference-makers’ at the rb and wr spots, that shouldn’t pose a problem in this round.
-Speaking of, both J.K. Dobbins and Gus Edward were hobbled by ankle ouchies and were limited in practice up to Wednesday. Both are expected to gut it out and play-it’s the playoffs after all.
-Houston was a middling 5-3 at home this year-they’re not getting the type of advantage one would like to have in the postseason.
-They’ll need some help from the defense with turnovers but Herbert won’t likely be offering. He’s only the second QB ever to have 500+ attempts and throw three or less INT’s.
-Without Diggs and Dell the offense seems to have stalled out a bit. That’s no fault of Mixon’s, he has 1250 combined yards from scrimmage for the fourth straight year.
-The Texans are unique in that they scored 372 points on offense (good!) and gave up exactly 372 points on defense (not so good!)
-You’d think the vaunted Chargers defense would be ranked higher (11th) given they’ve only given up 13 points in their last two games but it took some time for it all to come together. They do have the league’s #1 scoring D however.
Knock yourselves out.
Benny Hill music plays
KICK 2!!!
Electric Boogaloo
What in the actual fuck is going on in this game?
when did the texans become the 85 bears
ok there they turned into the 08 lions
Did they switch uniforms at halftime up in this bitch?
Justin Herbert is quickly turning into the white Jameis Winston.
Herbert’s pastor act would be about Mother Gaia.
If one team that doesn’t exist defeats a team that no one care about in the playoffs, what sound does it make?
https://youtu.be/fZbK4j2Ow_A
Ffffpppth
More turnovers than Andy Reid’s drive to work snack pack up in this bitch.
I think Justin Herbert’s receivers hate him.
O-line too.
This game got out of hand really quickly
FUCK SPANOS
Night out with the lads for me. Inlaws staying with us. Why yes we finished 2 bottles of wine before I left. If I am going to be hungover I started you two on the right path to join me.
That’s the Chargers we know and love.
Much quicker than usual!
Almost Raidersesque
Pfft, like the Raiders would be in a playoff game
Hey, the Raiders at least kept it close the last time they made the postseason!
(please overlook the fact that touchdowns were only worth 4 points in that era)
Did you wear an onion on your belt?
When was this last time?
Now Lesser Harbs knows you just can’t take the Chargersing out of the Chargers in the playoffs up in this bitch!
change the city, change the coach, change the qb…
same bullshit.
same chargers.
fuck spanos.
Texans Slimedown!
(yes I did just switch to the Spongebob version, this is pretty fun)
I just switched too. I don’t know what I’ve been doing my whole life without this telecast.
I’m watching every Nickelodeon game from now on.
The Dr. Mrs. is doing a pretty thorough job sweeping the patio. I don’t have the heart to tell her that the winds are coming back very soon.
Dicker endorsed for the NFL Man of the Year by the National Organization for Women
“It was a close race, but he finished just a few inches ahead of the competition”
-Deanna Favre, Commissioner, National Organization for Women
I still love this clip, he just has the perfect name for being a kicker
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=2-vFXM_b2wE
I’m not hungry because of my possible ebola, but I should eat something so ordering shame pizza it is!
Doktor’s orders!!
Emergency shame pizza?
the only shame pizza is no pizza at all
Domino’s? Exactly how shameful is this pizza?
I like my pizza like I like my men, fast, cheap, and covered in cheese
I have to go to sleep now so that I wake younger skull fracture kid up in 4 hours for his run down to Toronto. See you then!
Godsleep man
2nd and 40! Get Donovan McNabb on the hotline!
2nd and 40
NFL BLITZ!
CSI SYDNEY
CSI TANZANIA
CSI LIBYA
CSI MADAGASCAR
You forgot CSI RHODESIA!
Sydney, you say?
My god.
So THAT’S who that is!
She is a national treasure.
4th turnover, midway through Q3. And winning.
new way of charger-ing?
femur drums play triumphantly
SUDDEN CHANGE UP IN THIS BITCH!!
SUDDEN UNCHANGE UP IN THIS BITCH!
And …
That didn’t last long.
B button! B button! Bo Jackson in Tecmo Bowl-ass play.
ALT.
And always twirling, twirling, TWIRLING towards victory!
Stepped away for a minute to make an Old Fashioned and come back to find an actual game up in this bitch.
This Al-Shaair fellow seems like a character that would fit in better with Hezbollah rather than with Houston. Is Houston the only NFL squadron that has a scouting department in Lebanon?
Jim Harbaugh always looks “painfully constipated” to me.
It’s that giant stick up in this bitch
A focused vex
steak and milk diet will do that
LesserHArbs walking like he got some really bad hemorrhoids
They’re evacuating Encino? The fires might thaw out Pauly Shore!
RELEASE THE WEASEL!
oh good, now he can explain what wheezing the juice means.
Hey, I was right, I missed nothing by coming into the game with a minute left in the half!
Fozz house. This morning. 1230 am.
A Portrait of Andrew Ladd McConkey (Esq.), 1781, Oil on canvas.
You can see the big helmet potential.
DeMeco Ryans, some excellent clock management here.
He was only coached by Andy Reid for one year in Philadelphia. Andy Reid wasn’t around for long enough to teach him the art of bad clock management.
Under Reid, Alex Smith ran a masterful 4 minute drill with 1:27 left.
the cj stroud we have been waiting for since last january is here again
Maybe CJS had some kind of Hulk transformation? Whatever happened, he’s now rock hard and ready to fuck!
He seems like a super nice dude, and pretty chill, so it can’t be when he gets angry. Maybe it’s when people are kind of rude?
This is not a drill. Offense occured. Defcon1. Please consult your FEMA disaster guide and the religious text of your choice.
a thing has been done!
If a football action occurs in Houston, does it actually exist?
Thursday Night, Jags v Panthers would be better executed than this.
When I coloUr rush…I coloUr rush with youuuuu
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=svlUgyxL84U
The guy they had to electrocute 3-4 times was executed better than this game.
Middle Fozz – destined to serve time – has friends over in the shed. Ok. I make my dad appearance. Give lecture about not drinking. Confiscate keys.
Have a beer.
Walk back outside. idiots are in a circle, huge billows of smoke coming out of circle.
IF THAT’S A FUCKING BLUNT I’M GOING TO KICK SOME ASS!
They assure me it’s not. Just Black n Milds.
I march out, grab the cigar. Take a puff. It was indeed not a blunt.
Don’t be silly, Fozz. Serving time is for BLACK teenagers!!
Unless Middle Fozz is in Middle School, I don’t see the problem with some pre-Ravens game drinking…
Trust me, he learned from the best. I just make sure he keeps it under control.
So they’re just…lame? Or trying to set it up so you don’t check next time
They could have been setting me up. fuckers.
My grandma and mom found one of those little brown Winchester cigars in my brother’s pocket years ago. They thought it was a joint, so they decided to smoke it, to see. I still laugh about it 50 years later, picturing them in the laundry room, toking it up!
You all know how fucking dumb I am.
Dumb enough to stock a Yeti cooler with beer, leave it out in freezing temperatures, and then remember that I did it.
Had to haul that fucker into the house, crank off the plug and then drain it.
A huge block of ice, with multiple beers frozen into it.
Several of which had exploded.
Somewhere in the next world, my father is so goddamn disappointed in me.
Seems like a sacrifice to the Alkyhol Gods. Amrrr… /shifts neck forward
Do we get a Jim Harbaugh freakout?
John took some time before pregame to jam his Jim voodoo doll with pins
“Check out the latest iteration of ‘Yellowstone’. Now with more old people and no minorities!”
“We hired some Mexicans to play Indians, so we’re good, right?’
as long as they NOE THERE PLACE!!!111
oh hey, look. A punt.
did not involve an arm this time
We need a Butt Punt. I am not sure of the mechanics, but we need it.
Get Balls and Mark Sanchez go draw it up
me: *has flashdrive full of porn*
bill belichick: *has flashdrive full of ladd mcconkey highlights*
I’m pretty sure that’s illegal
HEY! COULD WE MAYBE PUT SOME MORE FUCKING UTENSILS IN THIS TOP DRAWER SO IT FUCKING DOESN’T CLOSE AND SLAMS THE FUCKING GODDAMN TOP OF THE DRAWER WHEN I TRY TO EMPTY THE FUCKING DISHWASHER? CAN WE?
“Please, stop yelling.”
HOW IN FUCK CAN I NOT YELL!
Dulles Airport
https://ibb.co/cDHDjfJ