Out of all the possible complaints, the ones that consistently grab my attention are gripes about other folks’ bellyachin’. The most obvious is olds complaining about yutes’ yap yap yap about extremely laborioUs stuff, like needing to show up to a job interview. Less obvious, but more prevalent, are groans towards folks giving a fuck about plain government abuse–whether it’s “Ugh politics”, something about divisiveness, or “You will conform NOW!”, etc. etc.
My take? This is the Internet, thee void for anyone to bitch and shout and gripe and howl and bellyache. Not that there’s anything wrong about the phrase “stop complaining”, which is 67% of half-assed parenting. “Stop complaining” could also be an emotional slap-in-the-face for getting shit done. But calling out complainers on the web?
Taking time to type gripes about complainers is grabbing the rotting fruit on the ground and hitting your head with a low hanger when bending up. I mean, tch. Don’t opine, just post memes!
Situation identified, solution offered, acclaim universal.
NFL NEWS
Via Laurent Hrybyk / giphy.com
Pretty sure that tv is showing “Garo Yepremian: A Football Life”.
-the RAAAAAIIII DUUUUURRRRS sign LB Devin White for one year. White has a chance to start, says underwhelming report
-One-Year Linebacker Contract part 2: E.J. Speed goes to the Texans from the Clots, giving credence to the saying “It’s better to be apocryphal than obscure”.
-The Bills re-sign CB Christian Benford, who was entering the last year of his rookie deal. And right there SPLAT on the landing page of this espen item was a pic of the irritant punter and link to a video of him that had nothing to do with these news. If him or Steven A start showing on espen deportes, I swear to God!
What? It’s an age appropriate non-sequitur en inglés. “Read the room” they tell me at the #kontent meetings. Psht.
-John Harbaugh re-signs with the Ravens until 2028. Bears noting that 2025 was the last year of Thing 1’s head coaching contract in Balmer. I had hoped for a lame duck year this season, and then next year the Ravens with an even more cheat-code Lamar! win the 2026 Owl—for which I had the poifect summary:
Oh well.
SPROTS TONITE
All times Central.
GRANDES LIGAS
Bravos (Smith-Shawver) @ Padres (Pivetta) – 6:00
NHL
Tirana @ Anaheim – 7:00
San José @ Los Ángeles – 9:00
INCIDENTAL ROUNDBALL
Hawks @ Bucks – 6:00
Pistons @ Wolves – 6:00
Hornets @ Loomis B – 6:00
Warriors @ Spurs – 6:00
Raptors @ 76ers – 6:30
Rockets @ Suns – 8:00
TOP FLIGHT FÚTBOL
In reverse alphabetical, home team first. It’s in La Biblia.
Venezuela
Portuguesa v. Deportivo La Guaira – 7:00
U.S.A.
NWSL
Angel City v. Seattle Reign – 7:00
MLS
Portland Timbers v. Houston Dynamo – 6:00
Uruguay
Peñarol v. Cerro Largo – 6:30
Secsi Mexi
Santos v. Atlético de San Luis – 6:00
León v. Pumas UNAM – 8:05
Honduras
Olimpia v. Real España – 6:15
El Salvador
CD FAS v. Águila – 6:00
Ecuador
El Nacional v. Orense – 6:30
Costa Rica
Sporting San José v. Santa Ana – 7:00
For the benefit of heathens, this is like the Catholic Bobby Riggs v. Billie Jean King. For us raised into, and therefore guilt-tripped toward the Faith 
OBVIOUS CRAP ALERT
Saint Ana was the mother of Mary, and thus Jesus Christ’s grandma. I can just imagine a then early 40s Doña Ana looking away, saying wistfully within Joseph’s earshot “If only Mary had married God.” A total hardass, amén. Joseph is more than fine. I see him as a Ringo-type: professional, dependable, overshadowed, and a bit goofy (Ringo out of fun personality, St. Joseph on account of his wife cheating on him with God).
Colombia
América de Cali v. Fortaleza CEIF – 8:00
Chile
Unión La calera v. Cobresal – 6:30
Brasil
Bahía v. Corinthians – 6:00
Bolivia
Blooming v. The Strongest – 6:30
Why not both:
Via boredpanda
Colorful AND creepy. What’s not to love?
FINALLY,
I often think about the olden times, when hazing was “joshing”, bullying was “having bigger schoolmates”, and children shut the fuck up routinely (not all was bad, just saying). Back then “suffering in silence” meant not even telling your family. (Now, passive / aggressive unfollows on IG passes as private suffering.) Anyway, keeping everything to oneself, especially what bugs ya, can make for very sour old folks. Venting can unburden, everyone should feel comfortable to complain. The Web provides thousands if not millions of immediate eyeballs. Imagine, all those people, available at any time, to ignore you. That’s alienation of the crowded-metropolis type! Look at you, having First World ennui–through stolen WiFi even!
As to all possible complaints, from minor annoyances to ancestral murders, theft of lands or beefs with GMs for not knowing how to manipulate the compensatory picks formulaE: we will get a chance to hear each of those gripes. Automation is on it; on.one side, by November 78% of LinkedIn will be “Congrats!” bots. On the other side, machine learning already outdoes my Facebook acquaintances in identifying every possible inconvenience at the Motor Vehicles Dept., and tells it like it were Day 3 of the Hundred Years’ War.
I’m ready to let all of these gripes pass through me like most microplastics. Bitch, complain, and be extra exaggerative on how obviously this pic shows that your car was nowhere near the yellow line that got you a $300 parking ticket—“Look AT it. Right?!”. I’ll never tell you to shut up. In fact, for the benefit of the general population: tell a Puerto Rican to shut up and it will be understood as “I challenge you to be all up in my face 24/7 henceforth. Key my car. Do it. Psht, coward”. Let folks vent, keep auto body work at a minimum.
Banner via mythologian.net
There’s a guy on the local Nextdoor complaining about his HOA. His first name is Wigberto!
I’ve been to that San Diego taco stand!
Napoli, currently in second place 3 points back from Inter, won last night. Nerdy Marika is happy.
Lawyer in Italian is ‘avvocato’ and I can’t help but read it as ‘avocado’ which would probably make Italian CourtTV way tastier and more interesting
I always called it Avocado’s Number
Back in grad school we wondered if we could make a guacamole. 6.02E23 avocados converted into dip. It would take ~10,000 years to grow that many avovados based on 2003 data (avoinfo.org, not sure if it’s still active)
Actually I misremember. Given the age of the Earth and assuming even ~10,000 more years of humanity, we still couldn’t achieve a guacamol.
Sounds like Chipotle’s monthly special.
Seriously when we have avocado’s around here we call them lawyers. I’ve put time, effort and linguistical skill in raising our kids.
This is excellent parenting
Looks like the oldest woman to give birth without IVF was 61, so I’ve still got a couple decades of jumping through stupid hoops for birth control prescriptions ahead of me. Lame.
Like I tell Lady Balls’ son, you can’t get a girl pregnant if you go in the butt…
You can though if there’s drippage. Probably best to have sex in an x-ray machine after a quadruple bypass vasectomy
Get some neat xrays out of it too
It takes a while for the pipes to clear after a vasectomy. Like, 20 ejaculations or so before it’s actually genuinely safe.
Whatever, Antonio Cromartie
DC Defenders are undefeated.
#VivaUFL
(turns on Local Fox Channel)
“This is a very dangerous storm. Stay inside and take cover.”
(turns to Local NBC Channel)
“Look at our unpaid interns driving the interstates during the storms.”
Huh, I would’ve guessed those would’ve been reversed.
Local news tends to be pretty self-contained and unrelated to their parent affiliates
Fox 19: Better, more knowledgeable meteorologists.
NBC 5: Only Female Meteorologist.
ABC 9: Higher Quality Equipment.
CBS 12: Same equipment from the ’90s.
No word on Channel 25, though its Telemundo so the jokes write themselves.
I need more “likes” on my posts below.
I know you’re out there, make your presence known.
Any dickhead who ironically puts a “-1” will regret it, but that shall be continuously.
Thank you and God Bless.
Now get to work.
What if the negative one is given unironically?
I guess it will end up in your Tuesday compilation on of non-Brick posts.
Are you willing to offer bribes of cheap Chinese goods? I’m given to understand that’s how likes work nowadays
2025 BFL Coaches photo.
Oh my; sleepy eyes + khaki shirt + black pants = starting Zoloft
I think we can all agree that many countries have women and men that are, on average, quite attractive. But which countries, other than the English of course, have a bunch of uggos?
“Sudan!”
-N Bosa
I was cracking’ jokes about Bob Dylan last night, but I really do think the guy is a genius.
He reinvented himself so many times. The abuse he took in 1966 on his world tour is mind-boggling. His songs have been covered in every genre, yet his originals are awesome.
When he electrified, his backup were the musicians who became The Band.
This video is from 1964. It is a Canadian CBC production. We studied CBC productions in college in Washington DC and more importantly (to me) the National Film Board of Canada productions. I really like Norman McLaren, and especially his short film Pas de deux (1968), which is one of the greatest influences on my artistic life.
This clip is Bob Dylan (age 23) in a very cool CBC production. This YouTube clip cuts in at the second song (Talkin’ World War III Blues) but the entire four song 27 minute production is easily available on the internets. Enjoy.
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=VFWQaLUNEdA
I think our boy Bob may have made the aquaintance of Mary Jane. He’s clearly all hopped up on the reefers!
Bummer about the college hockey. It was neat to have a rooting interest!
Time for sexy cable-TV watching (soon)
White Lotus (featuring gay incest!)
Righteous Gemstones (featuring creative cussin)
Yellowjackets (featuring psychotic teenage girls, which may be redundant)
That’s a strong lineup, almost Dodgers-esque
Found a funny:
Randy Felt Face Special is kinda funny
https://m.youtube.com/watch?v=fG0Pf7LlATw&pp=ygUOcmFuZHkgZmVsdGZhY2U%3D
And a caution to RTD
I’ve only read up to Volume XIX, no spoilers please!
I bet Volume XX is all Nigels peppered with Vivians.
No politics involved in this meme, just good old fashioned hilarious pun
“Damn Right”
-Jude the Obscure, while standing in line to get his license changed to Jude the Apocryphal
Sorry Horatio. Despite not knowing much about hockey, I will go to my grave screaming that that should have been a slew-footing major.
It was close, really close, but I can’t complain about the decision not to call it. Especially in OT of a game with the Frozen Four on the line.
Loud clapping sounds coming from the Penn State environs seems on point.
That sucked. But what an effort from the team picked to finish 8th in Hockey East.
But man, fuck that post they hit in OT.
Spartans refusing to lay down their weapons — checks out
Continuing from the previous “Sunday Gravy” post, I was talking about the DFO Vegas summit meeting of November 2023. Here’s are excerpts from that trial.
At the Vegas confab I met:
Dok Zymm
Don T
lite_cola
blaxabbath (who thinks I hate him but in fact I like him go figure)
Armed and Dangerous *
yeah right*
The Right Reverend Electric Mayhem
(I know I’m leaving somebody out but I was drunk then and doped up now)
* met previously
November 6 2003
https://ibb.co/c7mzCGV
Son of Spam! (also previously met)
Thank you for just barely remembering I existed!
Just barely.
I KNOW you hate me.
Ha ha You are so wrong! I merely dislike you.
That was good times
Very good times.
Figthin’ Horatios. (Icy Surfaces Divison), going to OT against Pedo State with a trip to the Frozen Four on the line.
I have my hyperventilatin’ paper bag ready and waiting.
https://twitter.com/jon_bois/status/456616952153128960
Welp.
It has now changed to my vomitin’ bag.