It’s Heeeere. Your First Thursday Night Football Thread of of the 2025-26 Season

For Jerry Jones so loved his Ego that he gave up all his common sense so that Dallas haters could laugh all the season long. 

Oh look, here’s Jerry talking to the media yet again.

I think we’ll get a true picture of just how dysfunctional Dallas is and how all this crap has really affected the players. The Hot-Takers are saying that them Cowboys are going 4-13 but I don’t think it’ll be that bad, what with the firepower they have in the passing game. And this is a passing league I’ve been told.

Look at me, getting ahead of myself. First and foremost, many thanks are owed to all the gerbils that kept the lights on during the offseason and second-most, welcome back those football fans that like our brand of cynicism and snarkiness. Let’s all do it again.

To The Game!

Cowboys/Eagles:

-No pressure Kenny Clark, all you have to do is single-handedly improve the running game, just like your new master said you would. Just wondering, how many snaps is he going to play, what with all of 5(?) practices under his belly? He himself said he’s been cramming, reading the play calls to get a handle on things. Does he play 60% of snaps? Does that sound about right?

-Oh yeah, that Philly running game-according to some cherry-picked metrics, was the best or 2nd best of all the teams. When last we saw Saquon he was ripping off 40 yarders and there’s no reason why he can’t again tonight. The question of whether he can stay healthy for two seasons in a row for the first time in his career is a question for another day.

-Speaking of, Quick! name the Cowboys backfield. Nope. Rico Dowdle is gone, replaced by the less than explosive Javonte Williams in the lead with Panthers castoff (how’d you like that on your football CV?) Miles Sanders. Some are talking up Jaydon Blue but that’s obligatory with rookies that have detritus in front of them in the pecking order.

-I’m a bit curious how the Cowpokes are going to defend A.J. and Devonta: cb Diggs is playing after rehabbing his knee all offseason and that’s a bit of a surprise. Taking on Brown might be too much of an ask, so does nickel guy DaRon Bland-outweighed by a good 30 pounds-take on the responsibility? Or should he stay with the smaller Devonta who has 6 TD’s in eight games vs Dallas? Pick yer poison.

-The last spread I saw was a Fellini-esque 8 1/2 which seems…generous…to the Cowboys. I think the wheels come off right out of the gate.

Enjoy the game folks and those that have been away, do say hello, won’t you?