And when that’s not happening there is a Gathering of the Mediocrities. So we’re somewhere on the spectrum no matter the tilt.

To The Games!

Steelers/Browns:

There was talk that Pitt could win the division before they even took the field today but that involved Green Bay doing a favor for Rodgers and you knew that wasn’t going to happen. “The Garrett Sack Watch” sounds like a new jewelry accoutrement but it’s one of the few reasons to watch Cleveland’s defense. He only needs to put Aaron on the ground one time to eclipse Strahan’s taint(ed record).

Pats/Jets:

One way to rack up wins is to get them W’s on the road any time you can and that’s what New England has done, not losing a single one. Should they do what’s expected they’ll be only the second team to do it (Niners) three times. Will Glenn survive the offseason? I’d say yes but a defensive coach firing his DC is a weird look. But then again, it’s the Jets and things are always going sideways.

Saints/Titans:

New Orleans has won three in a row and their last loss was by one score. All kinds of credit go to rook qb Shough who has played his team out of a primo draft spot with which to pick his replacement. Well done, sensei!

Jags/Colts:

Jax being 11-5 is one thing that’s come out of nowhere but the offense catching fire is something else altogether. They’ve scored 25 points or more in six straight and in all but one of their wins.

Bucs/Fins:

Tampa had it all going their way but the precipitous dropoff in play that everyone predicted for Darnold happened on the other coast. Opposing qb Ewers showed just enough (being willing to throw downfield and to a second read!) to Daniel so he’s earned another start.

Seahawks/Panteros:

Do them Carolingians have one more whack-a-doodle upset in them? Sweet Charlemagne, I hope so! Seattle is a zesty 9-1 and somehow under the radar at the same time-call them Schrodinger’s Team. They could grab the division but losses by the Rams and Niners are needed as well.

Gimme what you got.

 

5 5 votes
Article Rating

Leave a Reply

Subscribe
Notify of
146 Comments
Inline Feedbacks
View all comments
Redshirt

Okay, now the Bengals are just screwing around!

NotShogunButShogun

Now?!
*checks life history*

Redshirt

Bengals are saving Zac Taylor’s job. Yay, I guess..

The Maestro

Drake MVPaye, folks,,,,

Redshirt

#14 scored on this play:

IMG_2796
Brick Meathook

Milwaukee WI

https://ibb.co/t0stN6X

Last edited 3 months ago by Brick Meathook
NotShogunButShogun

I’ve driven damn near every street in that picture.

Bogdanski

Me too

Don T

TEN has 19 points in first half
There’s bubbly + beer here
🎶Vooooolaree, oh oh. Caaaaaaantareee eei, oh oh OH oh🎶

Unsurprised

Tits touch

Unsurprised

All these other games are close and then Pats-Jets is 28-3. LOL

Unsurprised

Correction: 35-3. I don’t even remember seeing that last TD

Unsurprised

Bengals with more than 20 without having given up nearly as many points is abnormal.

Redshirt

I’m enjoying the Carb Coma Dream

King Hippo

Touch of Downs December Mode intensifies

Don T

Today’s menu:
-Avocacado, greens, and tomato salad
-BBC chili + thicc chips
-eggplant “parm” (no breading) + long pasta
-leftover Kinder minis

It’s beef, beans & chorizo. Pervs
(Black and pink beans)

King Hippo

MAKES SENSE that Arizona puts no effort into containing Border Patrol.

Unsurprised

Gee, I wonder what Chase Young’s nickname is.

Don T

Itinerant Relevant
🤬

Don T

Therapist: Why do you drink?

Me: Now? TEN hasn’t had an RT since Conklin

Brick Meathook

Kansas City MO

https://ibb.co/Kp7grFGk

Gumbygirl

Is it levitating above the rest of Missouri? Can’t say I blame it

Redshirt

Border Patrol!

Don T

Van Jefferson catch!
/jots down on notebook “Van Jefferson exists, really”

Unsurprised

$500,000 bonus. Win. Lose. Postgame drinks are on Diggs.

litre_cola

And that pink drug from the preseason.

Unsurprised

/Hippo perks up

Doktor Zymm

The Back Hole would be a great name for an astronomy themed gay men’s strip club

Unsurprised

I keep meaning to say how the Walter Payton patch makes me think of Doctor Doom and how much it is like his silhouette

Doktor Zymm

Freshly Bakered turnover!

Unsurprised

Hey, Kool-Aid. Step into my office.

Because you’re fucking fired!

Doktor Zymm

If I ever decide to rig sporting events I will do it for the express purpose of bankrupting DraftKings

Unsurprised

No jury in the world

Rikki-Tikki-Deadly

And yet a Supreme Court…

Unsurprised

Yeah, well …

Redshirt

No, Dok would be rich and DraftKings would be poor.

Redshirt

That may be the first time I saw a lineman give up on a double team block.

Don T

The Tits are #4Reel* wooo!
* Saints are ona winning streak. K?!1!1!1!

Unsurprised

Beautiful TD. SO open. Such broken tackle. Wow.

Unsurprised

Oh. Of course that dogshit defense was from Cincinnati. I wasn’t even paying attention to who just gave up a TD to fucking ARIZONA.

Redshirt

The billboard has been updated.

IMG_2783
Unsurprised

This is the Gru meme with the fourth panel being Mike Brown shocked that they haven’t killed Burrow yet. “Save Burrow?”

Doktor Zymm

Outside of Newark airport it was all Personal Injury attornies and pain management clinics, no one cares enough about the Jets to get a billoard lol
Hope it makes a difference

Rikki-Tikki-Deadly

That’s not true, I remember my brother being super-excited that someone put up a “Fire Idzik” billboard. Then the Jets did. And then, as the Russians say, things got worse.

Unsurprised

Gotta follow through with your pushes, bro.

Redshirt

Geno Stone? Still bad a tackling, contacting the ball carrier and footballing in general.

Gumbygirl

Yay, shit is fixed! The site being down did not help my fragile state. And I am not turning the fucking Steelers game on, no siree!

King Hippo

yinz will inevitably win 12-10

King Hippo

be warned for the morning – Hippo’s attention level is SCANT and quite unlikely to improve

Doktor Zymm

Used the unscheduled break to head to the store. It’s actually not that bad out but I still went to Whole Foods instead of the further away normal store because I forgot my reusable bags and the whole foods ones make good temporary trash bags, plus I wanted to get some fruitand check out their barrell selects. Picked this up for $15 off. Visiting my friend in Kentucky again in Feb, I’m gonna need to either finish some stuff or add a tier to my bourbon bar

4918
ArmedandHammered

So Ewers can throw the ball. Tua who?

King Hippo

WEEZYdown???

King Hippo

yes, that and yard work are really all that boy-type children are good for!

NotShogunButShogun

I have the exact same scenario unfolding, including the helpers. Annoying

Doktor Zymm

Why even have kids if you don’t have them for choring?

Don T

Extra help is why we reproduce!
source: boomers and above

Unsurprised

This is a lesson in initiative and delegation. You are assumed to find the optimal solution, which is to put their asses to work so you can watch football.

Don T

Spoken like a natural Dad 👌🏼

Unsurprised

King Hippo

PREDICION!

The Shield will flex the AFC West games onto Saturday, and MRSA Men/Black Panthers into SNF.

/no, I will not buy into #ThePauls winning, regardless of scoreline

Redshirt

Bengals defense…do a good?

Redshirt

(shudders) Real world…It’s burns…!

litre_cola

I believe that the only reason I played WR is because I could catch. Wasn’t speed I will tell you that.

King Hippo

and BLACKER than EVAR

King Hippo

stuff can be TWO THINGS

Unsurprised

NPR tells me this is called code-switching

Rikki-Tikki-Deadly

comment image

fleshwound_NPG

testing…

fleshwound_NPG

yay, no more 429 error messages

BaldingSpiritually

 scotchnaut compliments my team? We’re screwed. Take Young off your fantasy team and bet the under on number of yards the Panthers will gain

litre_cola

Good morning, I’m baldingforreal and believe that I have an ugly head so will be looking into Tukiye!

yeah right

We did the gift exchange thing last night and I’m going to see Phantom of the Opera at the Pantages in June!

We will hit up the Frolic Room!

Gumbygirl

I am so fucking hungover, my hair hurts. I woke up at 6:30 and couldn’t get back to sleep. My sister and nephew are still asleep, I am thinking of smothering both of them with a pillow.

Doktor Zymm

You are doing the holidays right!
You’re in Vegas right? Drag yourself out for a Mimosa/Bloody/Irish coffee and be chipper and annoying as all hell when they finally wake up

Redshirt

Also, don’t let them wake up easily, either bang pots or turn on a bagpipe playing of Amazing Grace at Volume 11.

Doktor Zymm
WCS

He literally lived The Hangover.

Redshirt

If you go to prison, you can’t drink or get high.

yeah right

I’m thinking a breakfast tea then a bowl of yogurt, granola, honey and strawberries will be a lovely start to the proceedings.

If you can get even one meal healthy enough that counts.

Doktor Zymm

Oooh, I should make tea!

Senor Weaselo

Whatcha got?

I’m going to need to buy myself a tea set if/when I move, since I gave back the one that was at Apartment Weaselo on Swapping Day. Also I guess if Jesse’s Teahouse has any more aged white, I should get that too.

Doktor Zymm

I got a bunch of stuff, lot of stuff from David’s Tea, a bunch of misc tea bags from Japanese treat boxes, and some other random stuff I’ve picked up here and there

Redshirt

Ohio State vs. Miami: 2003 Fiesta Bowl that changed college football – CBS Sports

(sigh) …and so it begins, again.

Set aside the fact that the Miami Hurricanes overconfidently sleptwalked into the game and allowed Ohio State to remain in the game longer than they had any right to be, but somehow one very questionable flag cost Miami the championship. Don’t get me wrong, even I was taking the long walk of shame up the stairs when the flag was thrown and even Dadshirt and I were staring at the screen in confused silence wondering why the flag was thrown and questioning the referee’s collegian allegiance and betting history, but that flag wasn’t the only reason why the Hurricanes lost. If Miami was as great as history says, and they were, that game wouldn’t have made it into OT. Ohio State was a very good team that year, but against that defense, we would’ve held on into the fourth quarter and it would’ve had Willis McGahee not gotten hurt.

At least McGahee’s horrific knee injury got a parenthetical reference even though it occurred when Miami was finally waking up and that drive took the air out of the stadium and turned the 4th Quarter into a punting and SHAN’KLOR exhibition.

tl;dr Stop complaining about BLEERGH after 23 years. Miami lost because they overlooked the Buckeyes and allowed the game to turn into a old-school Big Ten-style Game, three yards and a cloud of dust, one possession game until the final whistle.

WCS

My old college roommate still talk about McGhee’s knee asplody.

I remember watching it. The whole room, 150+ collective, “Oooohhh…!”

Redshirt

It was like watching a lottery drawing in reverse; the person who matches all the numbers loses the jackpot.

Horatio Cornblower

Mrs. Horatio and I both woke up sick this morning. She’s got a mild fever, I appear to have a sinus thing going on.

Which means it’s PJs, slippers, and TV all day long.

Silver linings are everywhere!

As is mucus.

Doktor Zymm

So far my strategy of sleeping a lot and eating junk food seems to have protected me from catching a cold/flu/ebola from the various people spewing viral load during travel over the past few days!

Rikki-Tikki-Deadly

I told you not to use that Hershey’s cocoa powder. It would have been better for your healh if you’d made yourself a nice mug of piping-hot ricin and drank that instead.

ArmedandHammered

Since my BIL is immuno comprimised, my wife and I decided that it was not worth the risk as I have been rather ill for the last couple of days. Upside home alone, downside, home alone.

ArmedandHammered

and after rereading that, it appears the meds/weed mix is not helping my thinky. The jist is, I am sick and ended up not going to Montgomery Alabama.

Gumbygirl

The many years I lived in Birmingham, I can count on one hand the number of times I went to Montgomery, and it was always/only because it was the closest place that had a branch of my credit union.

Don T

Reclusin’s great!
/fist bump

Doktor Zymm

Pulled out my stake and most winnings from my account and am fucking around with the remaining $17.25 on dumb shit with promos. So far got $3.25 on the Imaginaries to win the Owl and $5 on both Dike and Shough TDs. What to do with the last $9? Looking for a 3-leg parlay

Doktor Zymm

Ok, I think this is dumb enough!

4917
Doktor Zymm

If this somehow hits, shots in the clubhouse are on me, including mocktail shots for our abstainers

Redshirt

If I wasn’t saving my remaining $25 on SNF, I’d probably tail your parlay. Personally, I’d avoid the Sanders AnyTD because he’s trying to prove he can be an NFL QB, but once you get within the 10, anything could happen.

Doktor Zymm

But that’s exactly what makes this parlay so dumb!

yeah right

All this time and I had no idea my sack even wanted a watch.

Rikki-Tikki-Deadly

I have to go to Walmart to buy cat food (and rat poison!), which means the Dr. Mrs. will request about a dozen additional stops as part of the trip. Would someone mind taking notes on the early games for me in case there’s a pop quiz later on?

Horatio Cornblower

Going places? Doing things?

The hypocrisy, sir; the rank hypocrisy!

Gumbygirl

The internet is forever!

Rikki-Tikki-Deadly

How long have you been working for the rats, Horatio? 

[grabs Horatio Cornblower by the lapels of his fancy Connecticut football-watchin’ suit and shakes him violently]

HOW LONG? 

Doktor Zymm

It’s raining in Chicago so I’m trying to decide if I am going to the Whole Foods or if I am willing to walk a couple extra blocks to go to the normal grocery store

Doktor Zymm

Just heard thunder, maybe will take the trash out and go to the even closer CVS

Redshirt

You forgot Cincinnati-Arizona. C’mon, you included the game being blacked out?!

Doktor Zymm

It’s been relegated to a Bowl game

Redshirt

No fair! The Pop Tart Bowl already happen! Warm up the Toasters!

Redshirt

We’re supposed to get some wind this afternoon, but with Bengals Offense and Defense, I’m leary about going with the UNDER.

146
0
Would love your thoughts, please comment.x
()
x