Chicago: Where The Rubber (Match) Meets The Road

The Midwest holds its collective foul breath. The cheese factories have shuttered for the day. Most crime has come to a halt although tuna casseroles are still being made. Cries of “You Betcha!” echo through the express line at Piggly Wigglys. Forty year old men are needing help from two or more family members to pull on their “lucky” high school jersey. Exclamations of “Cheese and Rice!” are expected to reach all-time highs. Yes, there is a playoff tilt between Green Bay and Chicago.

To The Game!

Packers/Bears:

-Chicago has been 6-2 so far at their den. She’s been a long while since it’s been tough to play there.

-Slow Starts: The Bears have been outscored 47-21 and are 2 for 12 on third downs during the first half of their last three games.

-Subtract Micah from the equation and the Packers pass rush win rate sits at an abysmal 28.1%. However, Chicago is slightly worse at 28.8%.

-That’s got this guy thinking that both QB’s can stare at their first read that much longer.

-All of Love, Burden and Odunze are back so there’s bound to be an uptick in both offenses.

-Look for Loveland to be a factor here. He started real slow to start the season but has come on recently, having caught more than 90 yards of balls in the last two games.

-This is a bit surprising but these teams have only met once before in the Super Bowl era, postseason, btw.

-BYE, BYE LOVE: (The Cars version, not Buddy Holly’s) The Bears are way out in front of the rest of the league in Roughing The Passer penalties.

Give me your best. Also, I know there are a bunch of Bears and Packers supporters out there-come say hello and join the cromulent commenters.

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Brocky

I’m stone cold sober

Let’s change that

BeefReeferLives
fleshwound_NPG

a decent bears team has historically been a harbinger of May You Live in Interesting Times:

1930s-1940s monsters of the midway era: depression, ww2

1963: jfk

1980s ditka era: challenger explosion, chernobyl, 1989 revolutions

1991: soviet union collapses

1994: gop revolution and newt gingrich

2001: 9/11

2005: katrina

2006: 2007 recession, followed by 2008 great recession

2010: tea party (maga forerunner)

2018: covid-19 the very next year

2020: jan 6 a few days after the season ended

2025: ……………..?

fleshwound_NPG

….It’s Happening This Year?

fleshwound_NPG

um…US/Euro War?

bafkreib57r7ef773fyyew6acgmqze33d2rtwzjtmozrlo4xrtkx2rdafle
Unsurprised

“War”

We turn off GPS and the Internet, then we turn off their everything.

This is why it’s really valuable to read what the right says directly. The right-wing Europeans know better than anyone how utterly powerless and feckless the EU leaders are to the U.S. It’s almost enough to want to brag if it weren’t so gross how much it hurts them and us. Mostly them.

Last edited 1 month ago by Unsurprised
Unsurprised

2016 was also the year the Cubs won the World Series and the GSW blew a 3-game lead.

Swear to FUCKING GOD someone should have put 2 + 2 together by then.

Doktor Zymm

Eh, one of the less impressive spurious correlations I’ve seen. Anyway, I’m gonna go eat some ice cream that totally caused a murder when I bought it

Bogdanski

Fucking hell, I was not at all a fire Lafleur person but I am now convinced. That was shit

Brocky

I’ll say this for him, his defense let him down, they got complacent, kept underestimating chicago, it bit them in the end

2Pack

All I ask for is a little consistency. They have been all over the place this year.

Doktor Zymm

Love isn’t a consistent QB. It was a joy watching him disassemble the Cowpersons a few years back, if he can figure out how to be that QB all the time he’ll be unstoppable

2Pack

Tru dat!

Brocky

When I first found out that iu and chicago played in back to back days, i just knew they’re was no way they could both win

Brocky

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Brocky

This is my indicator that I’m alive

Gumbygirl

You are having the best week ever!

Brocky

Except for my car breaking down yesterday!

Seriously, that shit is gonna be at least a grand.

But yeah wtf this is unreal!

Rikki-Tikki-Deadly

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Gumbygirl

RIP Bob Weir

Rikki-Tikki-Deadly

Unreal.

I made a deal with the universe that the Dr. Mrs. would get drunk if the Bears completed that comeback. But she has reminded me as such that I do not have power of attorney, so I think the only just recourse is for *me* to get drunk on her behalf. Right?

Jimbo

Them the rules of marriage.

Mr. Ayo

Somebody’s got to do it.

Unsurprised

That’s also a reminder that you need to get power of attorney. You know, for “estate” purposes.

rockingdog

Hahaha it’s ROCKINGGGG!!!

Goooooo Bears! 🫡

IMG_3111
Jimbo

Stop waisting cheese!

-A. Reid. Missoura

Beerguyrob

Lafleur should have to wear 21-3 like the Falcons wear 28-3.

Beerguyrob

Like a weight around Lafleur’s neck.

IMG_2640
Rikki-Tikki-Deadly

“Yeah, fuck that guy!” – Hester Prynne, who had the Packers moneyline.

Unsurprised

It was 21 – 6 at the beginning of the 4th quarter, even, which is like the 28 – 3 IIRC

Last edited 1 month ago by Unsurprised
Doktor Zymm

Oh cmon, there’s nothing Caleb can do to improve the cardiac health of Bears fans

Gumbygirl

.

Gumbygirl

Goddammit !

Gumbygirl

.

1000008595
Gumbygirl

Am I getting pity upvotes? That’s fine with me, I was just wondering!

Doktor Zymm

Dancing bear is awesome!

Jimbo

Does this da owners won’t be getting dividends?

Doktor Zymm

Ursine!
aw man, really want to try and go to the game next weekend. How much real, actual money am I willing to drop? Probably not enough

SonOfSpam

Both games delivered today!

Congrats to the Bears fans, including Buddy.

fleshwound_NPG

matt lafleur retire bitch

ballsofsteelandfury

That coaching job deserves a firing.

Horatio Cornblower

I hear there’s a Harbaugh available…

Unsurprised

The sacrifice has to be human to work

Beerguyrob

Final fuck.

rockingdog

Da Bearssss 🐻

IMG_3110
WCS

Matt Lafluer needs fired into the sun.

Redshirt

That last play was a microcosm for this entire game for Green Bay.

Unsurprised

Holy shit.

Gumbygirl

5 seconds back?

WCS

Did LaFuckface do it again? What a dipshit.

Redshirt

That should’ve been caught for a touchdown or interception about four times!

ThePirateSloth

lol the 3 seats behind me are still for sale, but they dropped them to $998.50 each.

rockingdog

Wait your there!!!

That’s ROCKING! 💪

Unsurprised

How generous of the seat holders.

Redshirt

Have to pee…

Kidneys reaching…critical mass…

Doktor Zymm

Injury time out, go for it!

Redshirt

Back. Can see entire color spectrum again.

Gumbygirl

Holding it leads to…Nawt holding it

Doktor Zymm

Go on, play for the 4 point field goal!

Redshirt

Prime Insights: Can go to victory formation with Change of Possession.

Thanks Captain Obvious!

BugEyedBoo

AWS Next Gen stat!

Unsurprised

Sure, they killed a million penguins to power that answer, but it’s totally worth it.

Last edited 1 month ago by Unsurprised
Horatio Cornblower

Yeah, let’s go better draft pick for letting Micah Parson go! 4-D chess baby!! No one plays it like Ol’ Double J! YEEHAWWWWWWWW I AM FUCKING CRAZY!!!!

Unsurprised

It must have been all the petroleum fumes he inhaled making his fortune.

ThePirateSloth

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rockingdog

Hahaha TD BEARS! 💯💯💯🔥🔥🔥🔥

Yooooo!!!!

WCS

Of course, the way this has gone BANANANUCLEAR, the Pack have time. A COUPLE TIMEOUTS WOULD HAVE HELPED, MATT LAFUCKFACE.

rockingdog

🕺 🔥

ITS ROCKING!!!!

Redshirt

I can see the 2025 Postseason has continued where the 2025 Regular Season left off.

King Hippo

They should have kneeled on the extra point so dumb fuck would have played for the FG (not that it matters, but he would’ve)

Doktor Zymm

DJ Moore, DJ Moore
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Beerguyrob

Double fuck.

fleshwound_NPG

too much time for the pack

WCS

Welcome to the big leagues, Caleb.

King Hippo

go ahead and get the TD. Hippo sleepy

King Hippo

that’ll do, pig. that’ll do.

Redshirt

C’mon. Hang on. No OT. 4-point Field Goal hasn’t been approved, yet.

rockingdog

I wonder if the Pope is also watching this game? 🤔

Unsurprised

The Pope obviously has money on this game

Unsurprised

If they somehow win the Super Bowl, they are definitely being invited to the Vatican.

Doktor Zymm

“sorry Don, gotta skip the white house visit, same weekend as the guy with a better claim to being god’s living representitive on earth’s soiree”

Gatoraids

one big indulgence

fleshwound_NPG

no way the pack fuck this up again

Mr. Ayo

Oh really?

Unsurprised

Horatio Cornblower

Arrested Development Narrator Voice: The Pack did, in fact, fuck it up again.

WCS

So, coming from the future…

WCS

Matt Lafluer is liquid poo tonight. Holy fuck.

NotShogunButShogun

I been saying this a long time

Unsurprised

This Bears offense, I call Unforgiven. They do nothing for two hours and then in the final act they murder everyone.

Gatoraids

deserve got nothing to do with it

Mr. Ayo

Where’s the Packer fans crowd shots?

Unsurprised

The wheels fell off the bandwagon

Beerguyrob

Where’s Mason Crosby?

WCS

Matt Lafluer is such a dumbass. That was SHANK’LOR’s vengeance for being such a fucking idiot.

Downfield Matriculator

To be fair, he had every reason to think the Bears secondary would leave someone wide open . . . but yes, a run to force the Bears to call their last timeout and line your kicker up a bit easier would have indicated more brains

WCS

He’s done at least three dipshit things tonight. Kept going on fourth down, he clearly can’t make up his mind on what plays to call, or at least can’t convey what the message is. He burned two timeouts and got a penalty because they couldn’t get a play call in. One immediately after a timeout.

Doktor Zymm

Shaaaaaaaaaaaaaaankl’or!

rockingdog

Hahaha he missed it HAILLLL! 🤲

This is ROCKINGGGG!!!! 💯

Last edited 1 month ago by rockingdog
Gatoraids

havent seen a McManus get shanked like that since Oz

ThePirateSloth

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Unsurprised

Stupid sexy Adebisi