The Gods Smile Upon Us Occasionally: An Open Football Thread

Buckle up, this is what we waited for.

Did you set your fantasy lineups? I myself am puzzling over Tucker Kraft and Brenton Strange because I have too much time on my hands.

To The Games!

Bucs/Bengals:

The next tilt has the highest implied total but the points should come fast and furious here. Burrow has all of his weapons, (for how long though?) the Cincy D is a whisper of a rumor and Baker just got paid. We’ll see how much Godwin has left but I like Tampa’s younger wr’s Egbuka, McMillan and even Tez Johnson.

Saints/Lions:

Silly me, saying last year that Shough was playing to see who would replace him in the draft-then he goes out and is competent and stuff. They say the knock against him is that he’s 26 already but the other side of that coin is that he had tons of reps in college so he knows how to play, as opposed to a one-year semi-wonder. (Richardson, step right up) And if they get a half-dozen years out of him that’s a successful pick in anyone’s book.

Jets/Titans:

Well hello there, car crash/dumpster fire! (but can you look away?) If history has taught us anything, jets tend to crash and burn early in September and this year will be no different. Poor Breece Hall, wasting away his talent there. I’ve heard nothing but nasty things about Cam Ward-will the whispers transform into full-throated boos as the losses pile up?

Ravens/Colts:

What’s a Harbaugh-less Baltimore football squadoo look like? I can’t recall. Meanwhile Indy is paying/treating the one-dimensional Alec Pierce like a 120 target wr when it’s actually tight end Tyler Warren that is the gem. Carly Irsay got tons of positive PR but maybe the pills don’t fall far from the counter.

Falcons/Steelers:

I believe both of these teams are among the sad sacks that are carrying all kinds of qb’s on their roster? You know how the old saw goes, “When you have 8 QB’s you have none”, or something like that. I feel a bit sorry for D.K. Metcalf-as sorry as I can feel for any multi-millionaire-who makes his living down the field outside the hashmarks. That’s a place that Rodgers hasn’t thrown to since he got ‘immunized’.

Bears/Panthers:

Chicago? A fun team to watch? Surely you jest! But yup, it looks like that’s the case and it’s going to take some getting accustomed to on my part. Carolina is my pick (again) to be sneaky good and that’s all you really need to win the NFC South.

Browns/Jags:

Damn, I just used ‘dumpster fire’ up above. What is there left to say about the Haslamites that hasn’t already been spewed on a sidewalk? Jacktown seems like an interesting team to me having finally blundered their way into making a good coaching hire. You know it was an accident, right? I’m curious to see if PG (we can shorten it to that at this point I think) is able to take the next step or it’s back to the ‘Comfort Trailer’ for him.

Bills/Texans:

Potential AFC Championship preview? As positive as I am about Houston’s D, I have many doubts about said Bills. I think home field is the deciding factor here.

Have you prepared snacks? What are they? I’m making Sudbury wings, they’re a lot like Buffalo wings but infinitely more depressing.