![[DOOR FLIES OPEN]](https://doorfliesopen.com/wp-content/uploads/2015/08/DFO-MC-Patch.png)
Pardon me, but I have nothing to say. Talk amongst yourselves. Or don’t. The floor is yours.
Please come back soon, footed ball.
Nothing to Say Saturday – Open Thread
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I interviewed for a history teacher position here in town! The damn thing just sat there for two weeks with no applicants so I went for it. The interview (with the principal and vice-principal) was Monday, and I was as excited as a goddamn puppy during the thing, so my pessimism in not having heard anything back is starting to take over. Not officially dead yet, though. Hiring me on a provisional basis would not be unusual in any way, apparently, and they have a mentor system set up for new teachers. I’d start 8/1 if I get hired. If not, hopefully I still get on as a substitute, which I’ve also applied for.
I realized halfway through the thing, “oh shit. this is the first interview I’ve ever had for a job I actually want”. I am fifty-two years old. I’m not to my daydreams being optimistic. It’s cool!
I hope you get it! What grade level?
Good luck! Always a good thing to have teachers who are passionate about the job 🙂
Lots of places are not exactly swift about getting back to people, so don’t read too much into that although I know it’s hard to avoid. Maybe ask if there are any updates later next week if they’re still incommunicado
Go get em Fronk!!
Have 15 minutes to kill in a CVS waiting for anti-baby meds. They have a lot of international cookies. And apparently they make gluten free oreos which sounds gross.
You know what isn’t gross? Peanut butter oreos. Yum!
Have you tried Tiramisu flavor? I’m intimidated. That’s Flavor Country.
I haven’t, but that sounds good
“Better get ’em while you can, baby killer!” — GOP
So you’re at a bullet vending machine at an Alabama CVS?
Its not a wire coat hanger machine in Baltimore?
Just get an abortion for fun.
“Wow. Fahckin CVS has two fahckin stahries of stayahcases in theyah stowahs? Who fahckin knew!”
-Tawmmy from Quinzee
South Sudan up 14 points as expected.
Someone needs to remind them this game doesn’t count.
Never a doubt!
Holy shit am I glad I turned this game on.
[DOOR FLIES OPEN]
HOW THE FUCK WE DOIN’ DFOers?
I have successfully made the Kessel (I-95) Run from Fortress LemonJello to Reagan National Airport for the 3rd time in 2 days. The Lady LemonJello and OrangeJello have this time successfully boarded a plane for their girls roadtrip back here with TangerineJello. That meas it is just me and the dogs guarding the homestead.
NakedJello Time!!
Jello shots!
Time to get nuts!
/has two beers and goes to bed at 11.
I’m coaching Girlzilla’s lesser footy team. When I took over as coach in January, their indoor record was 0-10, and they often were blownout. We ended the season at 6-4-2. In the Spring, we switched to outdoors, and improved to 8-2-2. Currently, we’re 2-0 in the summer, even beating an ‘all-star’ team.
What I’m saying is, since I can handle and improve a U8 girls team, it means I could easily manage a Premier League team without a problem because the emotional development is the same
Last edited 1 year ago by Wakezilla
Bullshit, the girls are way more mature.
“Not too mature, I hope.”
-M Gaetz
Brazilian sausages, Colombian empanadas, chicharron and now churros for the wee man.
Are you at Festival? I know the Selena impersonator that’s performing at 1. . . Unless she’s bad, then nevermind.
Last edited 1 year ago by Wakezilla
We were there from 11 to 1. Now we are at Cold Garden Brewery. Zesty grapefruit lager when it’s 30 degrees hits the spot.
That sounds like my order at my fave Latin place.
Reminder – much like the sun, the WordPress “minimum word limit” is a LIE
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Last edited 1 year ago by Horatio Cornblower
Mrs. Cola away for a girls weekend. Decilitre and I had bacon and Dr. Pepper for breakfast.
Next up Fiestival Latino downtown, then a trip to the best brewery to pet some dogs and meet up with my buddy from the local pro futbol team. I need to light a fire under his ass because the Cavalry FC kind of suck this year. To absolutely no fault of his mind you.
How are scorch marks on his rectrum going to help the team play better?
It will be a warning to the forwards who can’t fuxking score that they are next.
When the boys were young and mother went away we would have Steak and Eggs and Shrimp* with milkshakes. Did they fill up on the milkshakes and take two or three bites of the steak and shrimp? Yes.
*she has a shellfish allergy
That’s some awesome dad-ING from you and litre
Given the lack of steak and shrimp consumption Andy Reid would be inclined to dispute your assessment, but realizes that he lives in something of a glass house as far as parenting is concerned.
Are you going to the Calvary game tomorrow? I’m trying to take Girlzilla, but I got to move some plans around and Mrs. Zilla isn’t exactly all-in on these changes.
I will be there. Section 200. Only missed 1 game of this mediocre season this year.
My TV is telling me there’s a problem with the cooling fan. This has been happening here and there for the last two years. Is it code for, “Buy Another One Of Me!”?
Last edited 1 year ago by scotchnaut
It knows you won’t risk it catching fire with football season imminent. y due u think they call ;em SMRT tvs??
Our Roku used to overheat all the time. It got to the point where I’d put ice packs on it so we wouldn’t have to shut it off in the middle of a movie.
I would buy one with a better cooling fan.
What is your dividing line between “scrambled eggs in a torilla” and “breakfast burrito”? For me it’s fried potatoes (or beans). Without those it’s just scrambled eggs.
Agree, which reminds me that it’s time for second breakfast!
I just had mine – which consisted of scrambled eggs in a tortilla and goddamn was it *delicious*.
I crossed the Burrito Line and added refried beans!
Elevensies!
If I wasn’t going to do this exact same thing later tonight, I’d go to a diner and just eat breakfast foods and drink milkshakes until I went into cardiac arrest.
They can call work for me, damn it.
It’s 9:15 AM here in Los Angeles. I’m dusting my liquor cabinet.
Current state of mind (artist’s conception):
Do it!
Happens to the best of us, Hippest of Water Horses.
I’m going to recycle this joke from yesterday’s Request Line because I thought it was pretty good, and also because it’s a damned fine song.
“When there’s no money left in the state welfare fund.”
The fact that there’s only a civil lawsuit, and no criminal charges for what is a pretty obvious case of fraud and misappropriation of federal funds is a fucking disgrace.
https://www.espn.com/nfl/story/_/id/37565299/brett-favre-mississippi-welfare-case-line-explained
It would be nigh impossible to get a jury to convict him, even a federal one.
HOLY SHIT!
It’s the NATIONAL TRAIN SHOW®
Of the National Model Railroad Association®!!!!
August 8-11
Westin Long Beach Hotel
333 E Ocean Blvd Long Beach CA
Why that’s in three short weeks!
I am going to completely go and nerd out there
I used to go to the bimonthly camera show at the big Elks lodge in Pasadena and I’d look around and marvel at how everyone was a complete dork. Then it’d dawn on me “wait, I’m here” and I would realize that I was amongst my peoples.
That’s a lot of Long Beach appearances.
Fucking Patrick Swayzee
Bunch of friendlies on this weekend, footy preseason. A pit stop on my bike ride for a cold lemon soda. It be hawt out here.
So how’s the “Barbie’s Lemonade Stand” playset?
Refreshing
I will put it here as I put it everywhere I want! Lowratio ligue 2!
Promotion? Hell yeah!
Relegation from TWBS memorial ligue un? Bien sur!
Cost? Gratis!
Lemonjello is the commish.
*Note to teh Hippo, a bench position has been added, as well as kickers.
*Note to Dok, after draft everyone goes to FA.
Last edited 1 year ago by litre_cola
Aww kickers? Can we lose kickers for an extra flex or bench spot?
We tried that a couple years ago but then there is nothing on the waiver wire due to 14 teams. Having said that there are 5 signed up for the Lowratio league so far. We may relegate 4 next year to even up the numbers.
Also the kicker scoring is very low. Check it out.
As assistant commissioner, I’m off to override all litre’s changes and to make interceptions worth +6 for the QB
Last edited 1 year ago by BallsofLacrosseAndMapleSyrup
THE ONLY REASON YOU ARE THE CO COMMISSIONER IS IN CASE I DIE LIKE TWBS DID!
That was a lousy precedent. TWBS should be ashamed.
Six now.
7 teams in Ligue Due now. Rosters/scoring matches pretty close to League Un, though I was going to add negatives for missed kicks. Just because.
Oh we gots negatives. I will email you exactly what it is.
Pretty sure I’m just going to punt on kicker with those negatives.
Will we draft as two leagues, or will each league have its own draft?
Wondering if it’s the former if we should do keepers, so as to make relegation that much more interesting.
Although I’m not sure I’d want a repeat of Sill’s Insanity league, which had so many teams that Alex Smith became a viable choice at QB.
Due to Yahoo’s capabilities there is 2 separate drafts. There are 2 commishs, same rules.
In Ligue Un there are 14 of us who were in TWBS’ league before his passing. We will see how many go into the Lowratio league before we try to even things out next year.
Each winner of the TWBS league has received a Canadian care package that contains the worst Alberta Vodka, and a Big Turk at minimum.
If you need someone else for Lowratio, I’d like to see if I can bottom out in both leagues at the same time.
What if you get relegated/promoted to the same league? Then it’s the 1899 Cleveland Spiders all over again!
Shenanigans!
I don’t have a problem playing with myself.
You can’t be in both.
You don’t make the rules!
/wait…
I need to go back to Casa Weaselo and see if my freezer vodka’s still there, and if so, move it with me to Apartment Weaselo.
Saw the change and much appreciated!
Don’t worry, we’re just entering mandatory training camps, and the sweet, sickly, methadone of preseason is mere weeks away.
And looks to be an interesting season, even non-existent teams have something going on, and no matter what happens with Caleb Williams Bears fans will probably be hilarious about it!
One very funny scenario, he does great and the Bears make the playoffs, but everyone is salty about it because they lose both games to Green Bay
That tracks. My Bears fan chums refer to 2007 as a winning season. They went 7-9, but swept the fucking Packers.
Ooh, we should do a survivor pool for Qaaron’s soft tissues!
I choose the Titans in Tennessee with the blind side hit.
Can’t wait for the junk sick Mondays.
…but at least there’s a taste for us Monday night. & then some low quality shit to get us through the week on Thursday.
Jesus… Rog really is a fucking pusherman
I’m not a doctor, but methinks you may not have hit the fake word count minimum.
Close enough for doctorbs.
Well, I am a mathlete and think it looks like 500.
Yeah well I know what the physique of a mathlete looks like and I’ve never seen one that looks like you.
I think that might be a weird compliment, but it could also be a total diss.
It was meant as a compliment, but that’s because I assume all Canadians are built like this guy.
Where did you get my picture???
That picture though is worth a thousand words.
I love summer, but the sports landscape is lacking at best. Though I will watch the shit out of the Olympics
Yeah, you’d have to drag me kicking and screaming to watch (insert many, many Olympic sports here) at any other time but I’m all over it right now.
I’m a total slut for the Olympics
Me too. I fucking love them. Pole vault? Race walking? I’M IN!
Summer lacrosse baby. Playoffs are starting so games are starting to mean something
WOOOOOOOOOO
Morning!
Didn’t you have a 16 hour shift??
Haven’t left.
Be done at 13:00 DFO time.
Last edited 1 year ago by WCS
Thank goodness the Internet is back for that
That shift leaves you slim pickins Buddy. Is there anybody else here in the Euro time warp?
911 Call at 15:58 of WCS’s shift:
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