First things first. The verdict for a certain driver that went down for the count in Wawa is in. He’s on the PUP list with a blown ACL. (they happen outside of sports?) One fun thing (in retrospect) to do is figuring out the logistics angle when something like this happens. There are 7 delivery runs, 3 guys that can drive a transport, (because another fella is on holiday) 1 guy that can drive a 5 ton straight truck and some warehouse dudes that can drive three ton vehicles. It’s a delightful dance of mixing and matching, gentle coercion, low-key favors and hair-pulling. (but not that kind, Balls)
Hey, the Olympics are almost here and some sports stats site has predicted that Canada will win all of 22 medals! I have to take the way over on that one. [puts finger to earpiece] “What’s that? They won 24 the last time around? Oof!” Ok, we’re just not that good on that stage. But here are a few folks that could add to the tally.
Summer McIntosh:
She sounds like an early-blooming apple but she’s a kickass swimmer that is favored to win gold in two events as she is the world champeen in the 100 Butterfly and the 400 Medley.
Andre DeGrasse:
Remember when he blew everyone’s mind back in 2016 as a kid that came out of nowhere to place in the 100, 200 and 4X100? And then he did it again in Tokyo. Here’s hoping he can rise to the occasion once more. He seems to have that ‘clutch’ gene.
Ethan Katzberg:
He’s a Hammer Throw guy that is the current world champion and owns the longest throw since 2008.
Nepotism Takes a Beating:
The Bronny James-owner of a 26.2 field goal percentage-scored all of 12 points last night! If you watched it you’re a part of his eventual redemption arc that will be made out of whole cloth by everyone in your socials.
He Woke Up From A Dream For The Last Time:
Bobby Newhart passed away. And Yet Mel Brooks Still Lives! (I don’t think I’m doing this correctly) You want deadpan comedy? He was your guy from the 60’s onwards.
The Most Constricting Ring Ever:
The Bengals have gladly welcomed Tim Krumrie into their Ring of Honor and perhaps thought it would be a bad look if their all-time rusher wasn’t included as well. So welcome, Corey Dillon-your plaque and ham and cheese sandwich wait for you at the back entrance of the stadium when the ceremony ends. I was a huge fan-much like King Henry, he was a power back that if given a bit of space at the second level could outrun any linebacker. Of course he ate up cornerbacks that tried to tackle him.
Enjoy the evening.
Anytime we have future technical issues at DFO we can always remember that time the CrowdStrike bug hit and we were unaffected.
Yeah… we are made of much tougher stuff!
we should be flying shit.
and holding all the peoples money for them…
“Did somebody call for a flying turd?” – Mitch Trubisky, cranking up to heave the ball downfield
we’ve been lucky with the WP plug-ins as well, as we haven’t had any that were affected and needed to be removed. Good Jorb internet dad ( not that he will see this)
As some of yinz may know, there’s a global interwebz outage due to Powerstroke (huh huh heh heh) blowing up their own servers. If you don’t know, you will soon enough.
Anyway, it shut down our internet at the 9-1-1 PSAP. In reality, all this did was prevent me from screwing around on here in between calls.
Good luck flying anywhere on this blue and green rock today, though.
https://www.cnn.com/business/live-news/global-outage-intl-hnk/index.html
crowdstrike, powerstroke, whatever
And here I thought “crowd strike” was a USAF phrase for when one of their MQ-9 Reapers put a Hellfire through a schoolbus.
birthday party
outdoor wedding
food bank
What would you do if your dead mother walked in on you while you were masturbating?
I saw a TikTok of Hank Azaria trying to make a Beefeater smile by doing Simpsons voices. You and I and he know damn well the only one that guard wanted to hear was Apu.
Looks like The NY Times finally Woke The F*ck Up!!!!
Now they just need to do different versions of this 6 times a day for the next 3 months and the coverage will be “even.”
https://www.nytimes.com/interactive/2024/07/18/opinion/trump-presidency-record.html?unlocked_article_code=1.8U0.8EYc.qe6hp7l3duxA&smid=nytcore-ios-share&referringSource=articleSha
Doesn’t matter. He’s a lock.
The ballons are just like Trump, round and bloated.
They also kill a lot of birds. Or, was that windmills?
Hey, whatever happened to that Ben Gazzi guy? Did Congress ever catch him for stealing Hillary’s emails or whatever? Did Trump mention that during his speech? He was REALLY into that eight years ago, and it seems like I’d have heard something about it since then.
https://youtu.be/R5TTA4f7Q3E?si=_XccnEVBd1LD7png
I’m sorry to interrupt but how can JD Vance call himself an Ohio State graduate and FUCK UP THE OH-IO CHANT!
Its a Call and Response Chant! You go “O-H” or “I-O”. You don’t spell the whole state name, you fake ass poser!
He’s too stupid to do the stupid chant? That’s quite stupid.
HOW? HOW DO YOU FUCK THAT UP?
Look, he’s just a hillbilly from … uh, Middletown?
Yes, Middletown. From the desolate, remote forgotten…checks map…suburb of Cincinnati and Dayton.
You went to high school with JD, didn’t you? That’s your secret shame.
Not quite. Wrong side of town.
Look, hillbillies can be anywhere. I once heard about some in Beverly. Hills, that is!
And not even quite Appalachia, such a clownfraud
Found a funny:
[first day as an astronaut]
COMMANDER: we are about to enter zero gravity
ME: ooh i can’t “weight” lol
COMMANDER: lol
THE REST OF THE CREW: lol
MISSION CONTROL: lol
Is it weird that I want this? Neigh, it is awesome!
I mounted my steed
And farted and peed
When he calmed down a bit
I dropped a nice shit
I’m nominating you for a Pulitzer.
A Poolitzer
SPOILERS:
(morning)
“Well, I think I’ll watch the 5th episode of the last season of Cobra Kai. I’m sure it will get my mind off my father who is slowly dying.”
(10 minutes later)
(crying) “I should’ve went to work early, damn it!”
https://youtu.be/EImgHuqQsuk?si=Ka0KQxU1W0BSWCq-
He was Rockinggggg!
He really was awesome! 94 is a helluva run, but he lost his wife last year. I’m sure he was ready.
Trump is more subdued. Trump is more introspective. But Trump is still Trump.
Apparently the Never Trumpers are having an anti-convention at a brewery that sounds way more fun than the actual con
Punching myself in the groin all week sounds way more fun than the actual con.
True, it is quite a low bar
So, what have I missed at FascistCon? Don’t answer that.
Grindr servers crashing
Vance looks like the only one happy to be there.
He has a Trump boner.
So since Billy Graham cam on after Hulkamania we have the say your prayers covered. Who is going to get everyone to take their vitamins?
I’m sure Alex Jones has a large cache of “supplements” for sale.
Drove past the LA Clippers new arena today in Inglewood, the “Intuit Dome,” across the street from SoFi Stadium. I still don’t know what the fuck “SoFi” is.
Inglewood still bills itself as “The City of Champions” which is funny now that it’s the home of the Clippers and Chargers.
https://ibb.co/17jNX87
I think it stands for SomethingFinancial
I thought it was SomethingFiction
SogoddamnFishy
Inuit dome is the Catholic church in Iqaluit. Not a joke.
Did they tear down the Forum?
No the Forum is still there hosting bands like The Cure maybe
Fucking sweet.
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=8g6h1vI4Xv0
Worst live band I have ever seen and I’ve seen a few shows having worked in the business all those years and all. Sometimes the truth has teeth
I keep confusing SoFi, which is just a bank founded by Silicon Valley dickheads to Soft Bank, which is the one owned by the Saudis. I’d rather bank with the Saudis.
Ciao Tutti
Does Billy Simms count towards great players trapped on shit teams?
Fucking overdoses… KNOW YOUR LIMITS, CHEESEDICKS.
3 YEARS to make a second season of a tv show, Severance. These damn zoomers need to stop being so LAZY
They made a show about JPP’s fingers???
I will take it to the nursery but thought some of you tree vets may have a call here.
Got about this year old lemon tree. It’s got a shoot (well, this is the question) popping out. The color photo it really blends with the stake so I colored it on the other image.
Last image shows with the shoot being pulled to the side. It’s like the tallest part of the tree now.
Should this be cut off or is this how these bitches all grow?
Alls I know is lemons are like 39 cents at the store
I have a lemon tree in my backyard and it grows in weird directions. However, as long as you keep it pruned normally, you’ll get fruit.
Let er go the first couple of years to settle.
Then sell lemons to the Simpsons.
What do you think this is, Shelbyville?
Not sure if you’ll see this but usually fruit trees are grafted onto better root systems, so a shoot like that is from the original root system and is likely to be useless to you from a fruit-growin’ perspective.
Sorry to say, yinz are stuck with me again.
I wish you a slow night of cheerful commenting.
Anybody done any tv shopping lately? My existing one is a little old and doesn’t support most streaming apps, so I’ve been thinking of replacing it. I’m not terribly fussy about having something super high quality, and would like to cheap out and stay under $500 — is there anything to look out for? Looking for something in the 50-55 inch range. (Deanna F. faints)
Talk to me when you’re projector shopping, I highly prefer them
Try an RCA or a GE, I hear they’re great.
Sorny
Magnetbox
Brick gonna be like SAMSUNG FRAME!
https://ibb.co/pbzyKVP
Avoid TCL.
Vizio, LG have been fine for me. No reason to go more than a few hundred. They all have wireless now and pretty much any app you need.
Depending how far away you sit from the TV, you may wanna get a soundbar for movie-quality (ish) sound, but I haven’t cared enough to do that.
That’s interesting you say to avoid TCL. The TCLs we have all work great. I have a Westinghouse that constantly loses WiFi connection and a Sharp that also has problems staying connected to Wi-Fi.
Yeah, I got very angry at my TCL, so I hate them.
Super scientific.
All good so far with Vizio, 3 TVs total over the years.
I’ve got a TCL from Costco but have turned off all the smart stuff on it and use a nvidia streaming thing for the smart stuff and for better sound
No issues with it
Well sure, they work great in Canadia.
I guess they need to be kept cold to work, shrugs
“Well now this truely is, a Krumie Ring of Honor.”
And truer words were never spoken about the Bungles
We did some hulu bitching earlier. Just letting your all know I am watching The Terminator for FREE on the Kanopy app. I got it through my Las Vegas library subscription.
It’s way better than watching the RNC — PLUS the opening scene depicting life in 2028 looks fairly palatable next to the foreign-funded lunatic agenda for the nation,
I turned on the Republican convention on TV and I swear I only lasted about 4 seconds as some dude (looks like Billy Graham Jr) started to pray.
That’s Kari Lake.
Is it true that as a local newsskank she was friendly to visiting athletes?
I’ve never heard that. I mean, these people are absolute freaks but, best I understand, she’s always been a bit more of a self-indulgent bitch whose mouth and opinion run faster than her sense of logic and — now this will surprise you — tact.
“Fuck, that’s impressive!”
-R. Pitino
Hulk Hogan is up. Maybe it’s a good thing Kamala isn’t the candidate, yet.
NSFW: Racial Profanity
ht tps://w ww.you tube.c om/watch?v=LF_f2rklPRw&pp=ygUZYm9va2VyIHQgd2UgY29taW4gZm9yIHlvdQ%3D%3D
The Hulk is running for president?
Oh, God. I’ll take Hogan over all of the rest. We can throw in Undertaker as VP and Paul Heyman as Press Security.
I prefer Freddie Blassy due to his stance on pencil-neck geeks.
This is just superb work.
At this point, nothing is impossible.
He already has Bubba The Love Sponge’s endorsement.
JD Vance has those weirdo mascara eyes. I don’t trust him, he’s guilty of something.
Plus, he’s “anti-pornography.” Just like the most vocally homophobic guys are usually highly closeted homosexuals, the most vocally anti-pornography guys are usually great connoisseurs of porn and hookers. It’s the Jimmy Swaggart Rule.
https://ibb.co/d2SW58Z
Man, if ever there was a guy who didn’t deserve a cool-ass last name…
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=P52pjwY911A
Yeah, the man that single-handedly won Bengals games in the late 1990s to early 2000s and broke the NFL record pretty much in the 2nd half against the best rushing defense in the league and knowing every play would be a run, was passed by the fans multiple times. True, we had a backlog but he should’ve been in the 2nd year. Fans just forgot how good he was. If he was on a good team, he’d have multiple rings and be in the Hall of Fame.
Just watch the 2nd half and tell me that not Madden on Rookie.
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=kGUJ7zz7Q30&pp=ygUUMjAwMCBiZW5nYWxzIGJyb25jb3M%3D
I really think there should be a whole separate Hall of Fame dedicated to great players stuck on crap teams their whole career
I’m a huge Bengals fan but even I would question dedicating an entire wing to Bengals players.
//Stone Cold Steve Austin’s music begins blaring
Wrong track on the CD
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=z5mi18febb4&pp=ygUVZG9pbmsgdGhlIGNsb3duIHRoZW1l
You could have a wing of Bengals and Bills players
Call it a Wang Wing?
Paging Horatio!
Here’s next Monday’s Mock Draft post
The only real question is whether Barry Sanders or Calvin Johnson goes as #1 overall.
Sanders. He not only had the Rushing Record but the chance and ability to put it out of reach of being broken but walked away because he was tired of being a Lion.
Gale Sayers would like a word.
Sanders still wins, but Sayers and Butkus are in the conversation.
Marino. I know he’s a douche, but come on man!
“I would like to argue, I am the greatest.” – T. Owens
He at least made it to an Owl. Sayers and Sanders never even saw the playoffs!
They do.
In the Wealth Hall of Fame.
The Lions would have their own wing
Corey Dillon was a fantastic back.
More underrated than Akili Smith.
I was stoked when the Pats snagged him in 2004.
JD Vance wrote Hillbilly Elegy? He’s from Middletown, OH, that is suburban at best. From a geographical perspective, I’m more of a hillbilly than Good Ol’ JD will ever profess to be!
May you both have equal time as Vice President.
Disagree. May Redshirt have equal or greater time as Vice President.
$100 says if he was in high school in 1998, he’d be the type with low-riding FUBU jeans, frosted hair tips, and claiming he’s from “the hood.”
Vance: “Yeah, I’m wearing my gang colors in public but I’m not afraid.”
McDonald’s Employee: “Sir, that is a Marching Band uniform.”
Vance: “Yeah, so what?”
McDonald’s Employee: “It’s April.”
He’s 38, so he probably was in high school in ’98
He also wasn’t poor, so the whole ‘rural poor’ thing isn’t even half correct. He did have a shitty family life, but I assume the same is true of lots of people who go to Yale
…and were diddled by the previous generation of pius conservative leaders.
Oh wait — surely Vance made it through the Midwest Touching Gauntlet that was ran by generations of molesters and their apologists without ever himself having been sexually victimized by an elder in the structure. It was all the other victims who were the ones ACTUALLY victimized.
Gumby and I are up in Big Bear for the night. One of our friends from Birmingham came out to visit, in July, for Chrissakes, so we thought we’d bring him up here where it isn’t so miserably hot. He drove down to the Salton Sea yesterday, he’s a maniac like Taj! Poor Gumby barfed the whole way up here, he gets horrible motion sickness. But he’s had his morphine, so he’s feeling prettay damn good now.
If you mean Birmingham Alabama, they might be thinking heat which dries you out – what a novel concept.
Does the Salton Sea smell as bad as I hear?
It smells worse. Buts it’s creepy cool.
Does “ennui” have an odor?
Is that French for meth?
“I don’t know, how bad is your hearing? WAKKA, WAKKA, WAKKA!”
-Fozzy Bear
He said it wasn’t horrible, but remember- he’s from Alabama. Bless his heart.
It’s actually pretty common to blow out an ACL outside of sports, although other knee injuries are even more common
I figured the same but I’m not a guy that googles ”Non-NFL ACL Injuries” for the purpose of filling out the word count of a shoddily-composed open thread.
When you said, “The most constricting ring ever”, I immediately flashed back to a bad experience with a cock ring…
There are no bad experiences, just lessons learned.
/Checks medical chart
I stand corrected
probably was not that great for the chicken either.
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=2sVVl2EKgUU
You’re not supposed to chew it off the other guy.
Then why was the lube edible?!
My television viewing for this evening will consist of watching a bunch of angry, screaming, illiterate, brutishly violent monsters attempt to take over a nation and of course I’m talking about the Warcraft movie.
We are watching better call saul
I’m watching Newhart. Which actually, I was already doing last week
High T male right there.
Give him a vote!