We’ve got so much freaking football going forward, oh my god! Gird Your Lions! And your Bills, Ravens, Eagles and…maybe even your Vikes? Maybe these few loss teams are legit? I’ve no clue.
Minutiae:
-Welcome Pat Taylor Jr. of the Niners to the starting running back role of the Niners. He must be so excited to get his chance. Others are super excited to bet on which debilitating injury will knock him out for the rest of the season. The Niners have to win out to get into the postseason.
-There’s news out there that Qaron would be willing to mentor a newbie QB should he stick around the Jets next year. If Woody wants a surly, sour, self-involved, conspiracy-minded signal-caller, he’s all set!
-The NCAA president and the NFLPA Pearl Clutchers are aghast, aghast I tell you with the amount of sports betting that they’re not getting a slice of-just yet. So naturally they’ve asked Congress to “Do Something”. The NCAA also asked if legislation could be enacted whereby they could grow their balls back.
-He’s Just Like Us!: Mike Penix was eating a hot dog at Costco when he was informed that he’ll be the starter for the Falcons this weekend. Given the news, he splurged and bought the $5 roasted chicken.
To The Game!
Broncos/Chargers:
-If Denver wins they get a playoff spot. I prefer that than going over all the permutations and combinations the last few weeks of the season.
-Bo Nix isn’t getting nearly the credit that a rook qb guiding a four game win streak while headed down the stretch should. Sure it’s been a bit bumpy but the kid is an asset and his skillset will grow.
-Conversely, the Chargers are stumbling, having lost three of their last four and they’re on the road for two weeks to close out the season. Yeah, it’s the Pats and Raiders but still… A win here runs their playoff entry chances to 97%-a loss drops them to 73%.
-Since Dobbins was lost for the season (who could have seen that coming?) the Chargers have laid off the running game and the results are showing.
-Piling On: Last week vs Tampa they gave up the most yards (500) and points (40) this season.
-Both Herbert and Nix are tied for second in the league. Thing is, the stat is dropped passes.
Have at it.
I’m sitting on so much cash. I’m gonna offer fractional-pennies-on-the-dollar to liquidate the shit out of all of the poor dumb MAGAs that thought bringing talking points to a gun fight would be beneficial to their families.
I guess they can relish in the fact that, when Trump gives me EVEN MOAR tax cuts and then posts some gif about Nancy Pelosi, their movement will truly have me p0wn3d.
I like this one.
Fucking Regan
I was born under Regan. I’ve never seen a world that isn’t on the current trend line.
https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Dryden,_Ontario
Found scotchy’s base of operations.
The great unrequited love of my teen years was from Dryden. Thanks a lot for reminding me of that heartache, you bastard.
She was that girlfriend from Canadia we never got to meet?
“DRYden you say? Tell me more!”
– B. Shapiro
Scotchy can probably take care of that for you.
We’re watching a movie called A Paris Christmas Waltz and it’s got Matthew Morrison in it, who some might remember as the guy who got fired as a judge from So You Think You Can Dance for trying to bang one of the dancers. Very unprofessional. Very understandable, though.
Anyhow, this is the second Xmas movie in a row that I am rooting for the male protagonist to get hit by a car.
Wait, wasn’t he actually banging Paula Abdul?
No, that was me.
You were in the clubhouse the whole time
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=vWC7qTZzGII
Who names their kid Brick? Lololol! JeUrry JeUdy is probably the only player in NFL history who was relieved he got traded to the Brownies
Brick Johnson sounds like a name that was omitted from the Space Mutiny episode of Mystery Science Theater 3000
https://youtu.be/RFHlJ2voJHY
The Patriots might suck ass this season but at least they aren’t rejecting trades based on Madden ratings
I’m granting myself 1 mL of bourbon for every lap I swam today. That’s 80 mL!
I want to make a street fighter style video game with Trump and Musk called Narcissist Slapfight
Divekick comes close
And it gave us things like “Fraud Alert Detected!”
Well that existed a bit earlier in FGC terminology, crazy to think SF4 locals like NLBC in NYC and WNF in LA were getting 15-20k at peak on twitch
Um…INXS?
TCBY
10-4
https://www.instagram.com/reel/DAtlelpSMs7/?igsh=MWQ1ZGUxMzBkMA==
Haha. Owned!
Tiny horses are the bitchiest horses and I love them for it
He was running along minding his own horsey bizness until he saw scooter guy. Then he was like ” hellno, bitch!”
Another Lost Kommentator.
Damn that is some delicious wine. I’m gonna finish this glass and fall asleep. Rest of the bottle is for happy hour tomorrow
I’ll pick up the slack and pour myself some bourbon.
On a second rye now. Cheers
Just saw a commercial where insurance adjuster are throwing checks on a hockey rink.
Let’s put aside how ridiculous that is in about 95% of such scenarios, and settle in for another Story Time With Horatio (TM)
My brother got his MFA at the University of Alaska, Fairbanks. Because why not? While there he frequented many of the bars in the Greater Fairbanks area, and by ‘Greater Fairbanks’ I mean that if the bar is Alaska, there’s a picture of my brother with a ‘Do Not Serve’ penciled underneath.
Anyhoo, one night he’s drinking and winds up talking to another guy, a guy who’s larger than most people. A guy who turns out to be former Hartford Whaler Grant Jennings.
They hit it off, (my brother can hit it off with anyone in a bar. and also start an absolute brawl with anyone), and get to talking and having a high old time. They’re walking out, and my brother days “I just want to give you a check right now.”
Grant, who is hammered. is puzzled. “Why would you give me money?” he asks, no doubt wondering what kind of freak he’s just been hammering beers with. “No, no” says my brother, “I mean I want to put a hockey check on you right into that snow bank.”
Jennings looks him up and down and says “that would be a really bad idea. For you”
That’s member of both the 1991 and ’92 back-to-back Stanley Cup Pittsburgh Penguins Grant Jennings, thanks.
He was the throwaway in the Ron Francis-Zarley Zalapski trade!
Yes. Yes.
I am well aware of that trade, but thank you very much for reminding me OF THE TRADE THAT FUCKING DESTROYED THE HARTFORD WHALERS!!!!
I thought of you watching that Whalers documentary I posted before. One of the whalers booster club guys is OK with the Hurricanes doing a Whalers night once a year. I’m with you, that’s just wrong on so many levels.
That person is a heretic deserving of death by Snu-Snu.
From the small amount of drinking I’ve done in Alaskan bars, he sounds like the quintessential Alaska drinker.
He’s got another story of walking into what he did not know was a Native bar, having everyone in there turn around and glare at him, and doing an instant 180.
Just a very different world.
He should have gone into the Native bar, stood by the doorway, eyeballed all the patrons, and said “I smell sheep shit” and then walked out.
Yes! Easiest path to the Playoffs!
Red: “The Bengals lost to the Browns, of course, but that didn’t extinguish Redshirt’s cautious optimism.”
Just like a low-income Trump voter, Redshirts optimism is both unjustified and unabated.
The difference, of course, is that I’m not rooting for Redshirt to die of hookworm.
https://ibb.co/CJ8BFjp
I see the ceement pond!
People want new builds customized to the tastes they learned on HGTV.
Nice of the Charges to end with a tribute to Philip Rivers
next year is the 20th anniversary of danica patrick’s rookie year in indycar and when she almost won the indy 500
fuck her maga ass and cte maggot brain
announcement earlier today was that another young woman is gonna join the junior indycar division next year to hopefully make it to the big time. gotta brush up on my german
sexy friday gets an early start
And what an incredible career it was. She and ESPN will tell you so!
Diversity competitor.
Hey y’all. I just spent 4 hours alternating between driving in traffic and pulling over to do work using my phone as a hotspot. I did pick up a bunch of amazing wine, so will pour myself a glass as soon as I muster the willpower to stand up and walk the 5 or so meters over to the open bottle I was gifted
Get up. Grab the bottle, opener, glass and sit back down. 1 trip accomplishes all.
Meters? What country are you in?
Meters are just HUUUUUUUGE yards
*metres
You would love this Cab. I would share but pouring it on my phone would just break my phone and waste some wine instead of wirelessly transmitting it to you
You can do it, Zymm. I have faith in you.
“i was going to seduce you, and then I saw your toenails.”
Actual quote.
FUCK!
You shouldn’t talk that way to the dog, Fozzie. She can’t take herself to the groomer!
Goddammit, we have to have another national game next week? Can’t the Bears just shit in the woods in regional coverage?
You take it and you like it
It’s as beautiful as you can imagine!
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=xbKSQ0saOok&pp=ygUNZmlzdCBvZiBqZXN1cw%3D%3D
Neutered ripoff of Pasolini’s “Fisting Jesus”.
the cure for chargering: an insane coach that has milk with his steak
RAW MILK, RAW STEAK
With raw jelly beans.
Broncos Busted
Fuck Dean Spanos
Evergreen
by the numbers only 7-ish people on earth have not seen either the gingham style video nor a mr beast video
here is one. hi.
I admit I learned of Mr Beast probably around COVID, so he was already big.
Something about him turned me off back then, and never did pay attention to him.
What do you know.
as much as you
Same. Good company here at DFO.
I still have no idea who Mr. Beast is, but I have seen the gingham video once.
I may not have finished it.
I know who Mr. Beast is. I’ve never seen his shit, and I want to keep it that way.
He’s a YouTuber or something?
Philanthropist Youtuber who gives stuff away and holds games to give stuff away.
Oh, I think I read an article about him, something about people in a stadium trying out for some competition series who couldn’t access their medication or something
https://www.bbc.com/news/articles/ckgn8d04kdko
He seems okay, but I said the same thing about OJ, and Vick, and Trump, and me and Democracy…
https://variety.com/2024/digital/news/mrbeast-amazon-sued-beast-games-contestants-class-action-1236148181/
No, he’s a shyster prick like the others. This is just one of many lawsuits filed against him this year. The gild is off the shit coin.
I guess that explains all the Teslas he gives away.
I’ve seen the Gangnam video, but have kids and a coworker that’s from South Korea, so should get a pass.
Have no clue who the beast guy is, nor do I care.
I have no idea what y’all are talking about.
Trump-backed spending deal fails in House, shutdown approaches
…and that’s all the motivation to get my money out of my ETrade account. I’ll dip my toe back in after the Depression.
You have money? I have Social Security and a military pension. This will be me in a year or two
I also have a 401K but I’m penciled that money in so I can erase it later.
My 401K has been doing phenomenally since the election, and I’m just looking at the gains and laughing, because they’re going right in the fucking toilet over the next two years.
Move everything into weapon manufacturers.
He can invest on my workouts?
I have 10 vacation days over the next two weeks and you can bet “having a long conversation with my financial advisor, or making real-life friends with Blax” is on my list of things to do.
Waves from 51st state….
We had better fucking not do that
RTD tried that.
I’m insufferable.
Hey, what’s your problem with Elon sinking congressional consensus based on bullshit?
If Bo Nix can win OROY that would be great…
Sutton td Bo
I confidently predict a Chargers-Rams Superb Owl.
He absolutely looked down to make sure his feet were in. That was great.
Hail BLEERGH