Hello there fellow DFO’er. Hope you’re well today. And thanks for coming back to see last weeks tl;dr of last week as decided by my brain. There’s no reason as to why some comments make it and others don’t. Seriously. There isn’t.
This weeks cheesy motivational quote is:
Got nothing. Was off yesterday but was productive. Hot here, almost in the 30’s (C). Way too much for my blood this early in the summer.
Without further ado, here are the comments of the week.
Fucking remote missing. Again. We don’t live in the fucking Taj Mahal.
jjfozz
If I had a dollar for every time I’ve carried the remote into the kitchen while getting a snack, then left it there, wandered back into the TV room and then spent ten minutes wondering where the fucking remote was, I’d have Applebee’s money.
And I do have Applebee’s money.
What I’m saying is, check the kitchen.
Horatio Cornblower
Giants v Cowboys in the first SNF game?
I hope Collinsworth has been doing his throat/jaw exercises!
ballsofsteelandfury
I’ll be watching and waiting for “Harbaugh Confused Face”, “Harbaugh Fucking Up the Clock Face”, “Harbaugh Blowing a 14 Point Lead Face.”
jjfozz
Played 2 games of hockey tonight. My regular game and as a sub for another team. At least I won my game. The sub team did me zero favors defensively.
TL:DR: I’m tired and having a beer. How the fuck ya doing?
Sharkbait
Are you a goalie? There is no scarcer a resource in grown man whale shit hockey than a capable (breathing) ‘tender.
You should charge for subbing if that’s the case. In beer, of course.
I’m doing well, to answer the question. Had a good night of bowling – won $16 with 3 turkeys – and recently rediscovered the joys of crunchy peanut butter.
BC Dick
So Stewart Johnston is a provincial disgrace?
And what does all this mean for the Leafs’ playoff chances next season?
LemonJello

Sharkbait
Ciao tutti
2Pack
As usual, the Chargers are kicking ass on schedule videos (as opposed to kicking ass at football):
https://x.com/chargers/status/2055068428978004027
SonOfSpam
… that’s when I said, “Hey Scalia! Quit hogging RBG! This plug ain’t gonna move itself!”
…we were never allowed back at Denny’s.
NotShogunButShogun
Oh good it’s snowing. Welcome to May long weekend in Alberta.
litre_cola
Work-related adrenaline is starting to wear off.
Spent 13 minutes giving a 17-year-old CPR instructions for his grandad having a heart attack. Guy wasn’t awake, ineffective breathing. Kid didn’t panic, didn’t complain, didn’t say he needed a break. He’s going to be sore as all hell later, and likely will be traumatized for a long time. Took responders 13 minutes to get there; had to have felt like 49 hours for the kid.
But.. EMS was able to get a pulse, and got grandad to the hospital. He likely wouldn’t have if his grandson didn’t step up. I respect the hell out of him. “I’m really sore,” was what he said as we were hanging up.
WCS
Present and accounted for.
My replacement car had a battery warning light 10 days after I bought it.
Bought a new battery but that wasn’t it.
It was the battery charging system.
A new alternator in layman’s terms.
Called the dealership, they had me come right in and 2 plus days later I’ve got my car back with a new alternator.
They had the nerve to charge me…
0.00 for the whole thing.
Mad respect.
yeah right
Took a trip down to the alma mater for my son’s girlfriend’s grad party. So yeah, maybe I drank a bunch of tall boy Miller Lites, and then poured myself a wicked vodka tonic. And yeah, maybe I did my Monkey Walk, but hey it was a fine old time.
jjfozz
WCS
Admin
May 16, 2026 1:06 pm
I wouldn’t know. Let’s ask the one true king
Gumbygirl
Stopped at one of my favorite bakeries and got a bunch of scones, some carrot cake, and some french toast bread pudding which I have already eaten in preperation of drinking a bunch of wine in an hour or two. Yum!
Doktor Zymm
Pro Tip: Listen to your mom and never ride (much less race) a motorcycle.
Mr. Ayo
I leaned over, but she stopped with her right hand on my chest. But she approached her face. I could feel her breath and was petrified with electricity
-I want to reveal my soul and body to you.
She was staring at me, stroking my shirt. At that moment, the only world was her eyes and my imagination running wild about all the things I’d do in her bed.
Then her cellphoned pinged “Oop. Gotta go BYE”, and she hurried home without even a kiss. Never heard from her again.
That’s from a story I’m working on, current title “yeah right had a pastrami sammich in Paris and no pic wtf!”
Don T
I’m netting fruit trees this morning. First time doing this. AI says fruit should be ready in July. I dont know about the apples — they still look like little shitheads but the desert gold peaches are already RED and flavorful. So fuck those birds if they think they’re taking this from me.
Given this is my first go around, I expect i am tying them too tight or something and now the heat is going to just deform all the branches weird permanently. But we’ll see….
blaxabbath
Google CEO Eric Schmidt got booed talking about A.I. during his graduation commencement speech at Univ of Arizona
Lmao that’s Rocking
rockingdog
It deserves repeating, Seamus died protecting his elderly and vulnerable mother.
Yeah his lifestyle got him to that point but he should have been very treatable.
Look again at the date and time.
This was in May of 2020 during the storm of the pandemic and there was no way in helll he was going to go to a hospital and risk an infection that he could bring home to possibly impact moms.
Sounds trite if you see it that way but I saw a son protecting his mother.
That’s a very Mark thing to do and I’ll believe that until the day I die.
God speed my brother.
Love you and miss you.
yeah right
Found a funny:
COSTCO: here, try this
ME: oh yummy
COSTCO: so you like it?
ME: yes, it’s delicious
COSTCO: well, we don’t sell it anymore and you’ll never see it again.
rockingdog
raises vodka glass
To not getting ass herpes from cowboys!
Doktor Zymm
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Thanks for all the comments and funny and everything else.
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