Your Wednesday Evening Snow Day Open Thread

NFL Nuggets:

  • Panthers LB Luke Kuechly is retiring after eight seasons.
    • Given all the injuries, it’s really been about six actual playing seasons.
      • Which kinda, sorta explains why he’s out.
    • It’s not like his contract had expired either, as Kuechly had two years remaining on his deal in Carolina and is walking away from $10.8 million in 2020.
  • Fitty is back! He makes the game fun to watch.
    • He’s returning for his 17th season, and his contract is $11.0 million with incentives.
    • To directly plagiarize the nfl.com article, because it says all the good stuff in one sentence:
      • “The 11-time Pro Bowler and former Walter Payton NFL Man of the Year sits No. 1 in Cardinals history in catches (1,378), receiving yards (17,083) and receiving TDs (120).”
  • Because they want to watch the world smolder, the Giants are going to interview Jason Garrett to be their new Offensive Coordinator.
    • He was the OC under Wade Phillips when he got promoted in the wake of Phillips’ firing in 2010.
      • Prior to that, he was the QB coach, so it’d be a good fit with rookie Daniel Jones.
  • Someone died for real at the Ravens – Titans game.
    • A thirty-year-old man collapsed & died at M&T Bank Stadium while climbing the upper deck.
      • The Ravens contend that thirty-year-old Mike Kahler “slipped and fell on steps” leading to his seat.
      • A toxicology report has been ordered, with investigation pending the results.
        • The results will take between 60-90 days to produce.
      • Until then, a man named Fozz has no comment.
  • The biggest nugget of the day was the announcement of the Centennial Class for the Hall of Fame. Here’s the list, compiled from over 300 eligible candidates:
    • Players:
      • Jim Covert, OT, 1983-1990 Chicago Bears
      • Winston Hill, OT, 1963-1976 New York Jets/1977 Los Angeles Rams
      • Harold Carmichael, WR, 1971-1983 Philadelphia Eagles/1984 Dallas Cowboys
      • Duke Slater, OT, 1922 Milwaukee Badgers/1922-25 Rock Island Independents/1926-1931 Chicago Cardinals
      • Ed Sprinkle, DE/LB, 1944-1955 Chicago Bears
      • Alex Karras, DT, 1958-1962, 1964-1970 Detroit Lions
      • Bobby Dillon, S, 1952-1959 Green Bay Packers
      • Donnie Shell, S, 1974-1987 Pittsburgh Steelers
      • Cliff Harris, S, 1970-1979 Dallas Cowboys
      • Mac Speedie, End, 1946-1952 Cleveland Browns
    • Contributors:
      • Steve Sabol, Administrator/President, 1964-2012 NFL Films
      • George Young, Contributor/General Manager, 1968-1974 Baltimore Colts, 1975-78 Miami Dolphins, 1979-1997 New York Giants, 1998-2001 National Football League
      • Paul Tagliabue, Commissioner, 1989-2006 NFL
    • Coaches: (already announced)
      • Bill Cowher
      • Jimmy Johnson
  • Pissed about his exclusion – Drew Pearson.
    • “They broke my heart. They broke my heart,” Pearson said, in what appears to be a house full of friends and supporters and at least one television camera.


For the second time in three years, Vancouver has had to call a “snow day” and close all its schools.

We’ve had about 20 cm / 8 inches since the storm started Monday. It made for a glorious afternoon with the hounds. Naturally, I have the snowdog porn you’ve all come to crave.

    

It was a good day.


Tonight’s sports:

  • NHL:
    • Blackhawks at Canadiens – 7:30PM | Sportsnet
    • Flyers at Blues – 8:00PM | NBCSN
      • God, I hope they replay that Marchand whiff another 1000 times.
        • And I’m a Bruins fan!
  • In other NHL news, the Vegas Golden Knights fired their coach today, despite a winning record & recent trip to the Finals.
    • He’s supposed to coach in the All-Star game in three weeks.
  • NBA:
    • Nets at 76ers – 7:00PM | ESPN / Sportsnet1
    • Raptors at Thunder – 8:00PM | TSN
    • Trail Blazers at Houston Rockets – 9:30PM | ESPN / Sportsnet1
  • NCAA:
    • Hoops:
      • Seton Hall at Butler – 6:30PM | FS1
      • Tennessee at Georgia – 7:00PM | ESPNU
      • Virginia at Florida State – 7:00PM | ESPN2
      • St. John’s at Providence – 8:30PM | FS1
      • Auburn at Alabama – 9:00PM | ESPN2
    • Hockey:
      • Maine vs. Connecticut – 7:00PM | TSN3
  • Wrasslin’:
    • AEW Dynamite – 8:00PM | TNT / TSN2
    • NXT – 8:00PM | USA

For those of you curious about where the hell my mind was with today’s earlier #content, I’ve been prepping lessons on Othello & Shirley Jackson for my students. The structure is based on Iago’s speeches (it’s how I knew the Jeopardy answer last night), and the “The Lottery”-esque reveal is self-explanatory. Since I was already there, I figured, why not come up with something to share with all of you? I’m glad you liked it.

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Beerguyrob
A Canadian man-child of indeterminate age, he stays young by selling alcohol at sporting events and yelling at the patrons he serves. Their rage nourishes his soul, and their tips pay for his numerous trips to various sporting events.
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Unsurprised

Oh, that was nice. A friend posts to her IG story. That’s good!

It’s Junior Seau in the A A RON H documentary. That’s bad!

Unsurprised
yeah right

Alright boppers.

Just throwing this out there. If you have an interest let me know. This is over 6 months out and I’ll make the arrangements. Serious, I can get all interested parties into this show.

July at Disneyland!

Me and Uncle Al go way back.

Oh we gonna grind!

https://www.houseofblues.com/anaheim/EventDetail?tmeventid=09005827DFD133AB&offerid=118302

yeah right
yeah right

We’re going to build new industries!

yeah right

And if you missed the bus on Front Line Assembly allow me to retort.

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=jpuysm_aLLI

BrettFavresColonoscopy
Rikki-Tikki-Deadly

We’re watching a cheerleading documentary. Seeing all that teenage flesh isn’t nearly as sexy as you’d think, particularly when they keep slamming their heads into the floor and stuff.

Unsurprised

They don’t even get the legal indignity of being amateur student-athletes.

BrettFavresColonoscopy

Can we just skip to UBI land and forget about work?

Viva La Tabula Raza

After the Parnas interview, I’d hazard a guess that there should be some amusing/frightening presidential rage-tweets to catch up on tomorrow morning. To go along with his water-flow fixation musings. I personally hate having to run my dishwasher a dozen times to get my dishes clean (full disclosure I am a bachelor who uses the same five or six plates over and over and haven’t used my dishwasher once in the 10.5 years that I have lived here; tore the one in my previous domicile to make more shelf space in the kitchen). Also I hate having to flush the toilet 8 or 10 times to get a nice healthy log to head for the septic tank.

BrettFavresColonoscopy

Didn’t you know that they were stalking a US ambassador to own the libs?

Gratliff

CHAOS PREVAILS. Flyers just wanted the Blues to get that Bettman point so they we’re officially the best team in the league before beating them

Unsurprised

How deliciously petty

Unsurprised

I cannot understand why people watch true crime shows and documentaries.

Unsurprised

comment image

The Right Reverend Electric Mayhem

Seriously. I watch TV and movies to distract myself from the variety of existential threats in the real world, not to do a tight focus

Unsurprised

The weirdest part is that most consumers of true crime by far are women. Why would you do that to yourself? The thrill of not being one of those poor bastards seems like a nanometer thin reasoning, but it’s the only one I see consistently made.

Gratliff

Flyers absolutely dominating the best team in hockey two games after erasing a 3 goal deficit to hilariously beat Boston in OT 5 days after beating the best team in the East. Few weeks back they went 1-5 against the dregs of the west. Absolute chaos team.

Mr. Ayo

Chaos indeed. Wow.

Gratliff

Regret to inform you that balance is being restored

Game Time Decision

Big news in the lacrosse world today, one of the leagues, the NLL, has partnered with MGM, so one will be able to bet on the games, if so inclined*cough* Hippo*cough*. Don’t think it will be available in Canukia and may not be available in all states. But it’s a good step

herodotus450
Gratliff

Konecny scores 5 seconds into the third. Fuck you, St. Louis.

scotchnaut

I dropped some stuff off to a business earlier today. One of the employees figured out that my oldest is a regular there (he likes their smoothies) and told me that he is the most polite, intelligent, respectful and engaging kid that she has ever interacted with. She was so effusive with her compliments it became embarrassing. This came hard on the heels of my wife and I taking a real hard look at where he’s going just last night. These two things are not like the other at all.

herodotus450

It’s the most polite, intelligent, respectful and engaging ones you gotta watch out for.

scotchnaut

[wipes away pretend tears] He’s well on his way to hiding the fact that he’s a full-on sociopath just like his old man.

Viva La Tabula Raza

Charles Whitman was very polite, soft-spoken individual; an Eagle Scout, and a smart and relatively squared-away Marine who the USMC sent to college to study mechanical engineering in pursuit of an officer’s commission (despite some brig time as an enlisted man) when he grabbed his sniper’s rifle and went up in the Texas Tower and killed 17 people. But I’m sure the boy will be fine, just like his hobo-murdering pop.
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=8yteMugRAc0

Unsurprised

BTK was a troop leader

Viva La Tabula Raza

I wonder what it is about the Boy Scouts that turns out both heroic astronauts and psycho killers. Quite a dichotomy.

Unsurprised

It’s a paramilitary training and indoctrination program based on the English Scouts who were being trained to become colonial overseers and military officers for the Empire.

It’s not a coincidence that it was founded at the same time the U.S. decided that it was going to become a colonial power as well.

Viva La Tabula Raza

Sounds like it would not be that Baden-Powell of an organization. No poofters allowed, though.

Gratliff

Fucking perron cross checking TK in the throat after the horn. Stab that mother fucker

Unsurprised

Of course this exists.
comment image

Viva La Tabula Raza

I’m a pretty savvy person, but am not seeing who the farthest right cartoon character is supposed to represent….
I hate having to ask to have a joke explained to me.

Unsurprised
Viva La Tabula Raza

Well, I was still watching the show when the first two episodes with him were aired, but I don’t remember him. Getting old sucks, but it beats the alternative, I reckon.

Gratliff

Flyera up on the Blues. SOMEONE TELL ME IF THIS IS A GOOD TEAM OR NOT

Unsurprised

It may snow here tonight, and I nearly slipped on ice walking down the hill this morning. So winter can fuck itself sideways.

Viva La Tabula Raza

75 degrees F in south central Texas. I am probably wrong, but this seems like the mildest winter I can remember in my 43 years here.

Unsurprised

This is the problem with climate catastrophe. Before we become SF and eventually Los Angeles, the winter extremes are going to suck for a while.

Viva La Tabula Raza

HIgh or low temperatures may be the least of your upcoming worries in the PNW.
https://www.newyorker.com/magazine/2015/07/20/the-really-big-one

Unsurprised

Based on geograpjy, I’ll survive that. Not that I’d want to, but I will.

litre_cola

-41 in Northern British Columbia today. The hotel charges 800 dollars for anyone smoking in it. I guess the oilmen have been known not to care and fire up their darts.

Senor Weaselo

For the record I originally guessed Brutus because he is kinda the main character of Julius Caesar, but I guess there are enough prominent non-title characters (Cassius, Antony, Octavian) that it dilutes his lines?

scotchnaut

Just so you guys know, I totally killed it tonight on a Cuse basketball talky internet thingy. I mean, what are you doing with your life?

SonOfSpam

So I’m watching Maddow.

Have no idea if this is gonna be good or horribly frustrating (also thought by every girl who’s ever been eh you get it)

Col. Duke LaCross

Yeah, prepare to be underwhelmed. I remember the “leaked” tax return page incident. She’s usually better than that, but she really fucked up that night.

SonOfSpam

Agree totally.

Viva La Tabula Raza

I guess when you have to do an hour long show every night, it’s pretty hard to bat a thousand with absolute perfection year after year.
Lev Parnas is 13 years younger than me, but looks five years older. Plus, nascent butt-chin and a comb-over that’s almost as bad as the president’s.

Unsurprised

Alex Jones for the wealthy.

SonOfSpam

lol nah

Viva La Tabula Raza

Ol’ Rachel has quite a neck on her. I wonder if she’s related in some way to Mike Glennon.

blaxabbath

It’s be great if Devin Nunes went ahead and ate the business end of a shotgun. And then it’d continue to be great if like, every night, another member of the GOP did the same thing.

And then Fox News would blame Hillary Clinton and Trump would promise his white trash supports that they’ll be prosecuting her any day now…..

scotchnaut

“I ate the business end of a shotgun once. Gave it a 6.5 out of 10. Needed a bit more BBQ sauce.”

-A. Reid

Col. Duke LaCross

I really wish he’d have tried to fist a bull on accident back in the day.

SonOfSpam

Accident?

Viva La Tabula Raza
theeWeeBabySeamus

Riga and Lambeau will be mine!!!!!
(Just as soon as the US allows my passport back)

litre_cola

You need a Van driver? I have to work in Vancouver from time to time.

SonOfSpam

HEY. They are Limo dogs.

ThurberHerder

“Fitty is back!”

Somehow I thought that was about Ryan Fitzpatrick, and thought it remarkable he had that many receptions for the cardinals.

Senor Weaselo

I thought it was 50 Cent, with “receptions” being a codeword for “bullets lodged in him.”

Gumbygirl

Those dogs! They restoreth my soul. We’re supposed to get some new snow here in Big Bear tomorrow. I have food, firewood, and some edibles. Bring it!

SonOfSpam

My grandparents retired in Big Bear, and I was up there monthly during my childhood/teen years.

Glad to have Big Bear up in this house!

LemonJello

Glad to have Big Bear up in this house!

Jeeze, just light up the Buddy signal, whydontcha?

theeWeeBabySeamus

See, you just had to.
Now I want see how a big bear acts when under the influence of edibles.

litre_cola

Sorry, I am wiry and not gay.