Westminster Dog Show Open Thread – Day 1

Yes, it’s not Presidents’ Day.  A great holiday when a lazy ass Balls can wake up at the crack of 10 AM, throw some shorts on (never pants!), and get to the mall to catch the 10 AM showing of Deadpool expertly calculating the amount of time the stupid previews take in order to show up exactly just a minute before the actual movie starts!

No, that’s not the day today is/was.  Today is the first day of the 140th Westminster Dog Show!

WOOOOOOOOOOOO!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Today and tomorrow are the only days of the calendar year when the word “bitch” is NOT primarily used as a derogatory term for women (and sometimes men).  Let us rejoice in that and enjoy the multiple double entendre and dick joke opportunities this day provides.  Acting as Head Judge and presiding over the festivities this year is a Canadian evil mastermind named Meen.

 

The morning sessions are not televised and are held at Piers 92/94 in Manhattan.  The evening sessions are held at Madison Square Garden and are on both CNBC (tonight) and USA Network (tomorrow).  The Canada has coverage of both nights on Animal Planet.  Here is the schedule:

MONDAY & TUESDAY, FEBRUARY 15-16, 2016 6PM-11PM

Doors open at 6 PM for best of breed benching area

  • Monday to include Hound, Toy, Non-Sporting and Herding groups (beginning at 8 PM)
  • Tuesday to include Junior Showmanship, Sporting, Working, Terrier groups and BEST IN SHOW (beginning at 7:30 PM)

Power up the jokes, dogs!  (I’m sorry)

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ballsofsteelandfury
Balls somehow lost his bio and didn't realize it. He's now scrambling to write something clever and failing. He likes butts, boobs, most things that start with the letter B, and writing in the Second Person. Geelong, Toluca, Barcelona, and Steelers, in that order.
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Marc Trestmans Windowless Van

I am pretty sure everyone is really gone this time. One more Ashley Graham in case there are lurkers

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Marc Trestmans Windowless Van

I have a tumblr post with 20 of these, all thumbnail size. I want the full size versions. Ashley Graham again

http://33.media.tumblr.com/1d84a4eae791614a9dac60f1c6927bde/tumblr_inline_n8ztdzAFSG1s1ypf8.gif

Marc Trestmans Windowless Van

The Police – Don’t Stand so Close to me

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=KNIZofPB8ZM

WCS

Marc Trestmans Windowless Van

Ok, one more pic quick. Sticking with my Ashley Graham theme

http://i.perezhilton.com/wp-content/uploads/2015/12/ashley-graham-love-advent.gif

Marc Trestmans Windowless Van

Puff Daddy and the Family – Can’t Nobody Hold me Down

https://youtu.be/9CBFBKZbAHQ?t=4098

Wakezilla

I wish it would stop raining so I could go to the beach:

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Marc Trestmans Windowless Van

I was gonna post the Puff Daddy and the Family song that samples that previous song but since someone else is actually up I will pick something with a different musical background

Tears for Fears – Everybody wants to rule the world

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=3gQ44x9deLA&list=PL67C3614F4F786374&index=2

WCS

Marc Trestmans Windowless Van

David Bowie – Let’s dance, even though I think people left for good this time

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=N4d7Wp9kKjA

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JerBear50

His 80’s stuff just doesn’t do it for me. Appreciate the publicity it got SRV though.

Marc Trestmans Windowless Van
Wakezilla

She’s fine as hell.

I’m not sure if this applies to Ashley Graham, but, it’s pretty lame/bullshit that most plus size models are 5’11 and up. So, they;re plus size more for their height than weight.

JerBear50

She’s fucking gorgeous.

Marc Trestmans Windowless Van

I got distracted watching a Bill Murray interview. I have no song for you. I do have a tiny animated animated Ashley Graham pic

http://33.media.tumblr.com/0a3f0b4a84755b7897ec19363a039106/tumblr_inline_n8ztdy7sxg1s1ypf8.gif

Marc Trestmans Windowless Van

Just so many typos tonight

Marc Trestmans Windowless Van

He had the undistinguished honor of have hosted 2 late night shows before people that both redefined the genre. He was friends with Bill Murray though so he wins at life

Craiggy 1’s theme song

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=kMOujqUcsMk

Senor Weaselo

If you want a ground-breaking show, hire and fire Craig Kilborn!

Marc Trestmans Windowless Van

Jackson 5 – I want you back

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=DGDyAb6pePo

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Senor Weaselo

I like the David Ruffin version more.

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=LU_ipBnxlc4

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Senor Weaselo

I almost forgot just how much I missed Craig Ferguson being on TV.

WCS

Going from Ferguson to Cordon is like going from Kobe beef to Arby’s.

Senor Weaselo

He was just on Colbert to promote his new show and it was quite entertaining.

Marc Trestmans Windowless Van
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JerBear50

I just picked up his autobiography from the library today. I’m looking forward to getting into it.

Wakezilla

I’m working a part-time job as a social studies teacher for a private tutoring center. They called me in to sub for a grade 7 English class today and it was fucking horrible. I learned that I hate/cannot teach grade 7 because those kids are fucking terrible. The ones there are rich, spoiled shits that don’t want to be there. The center gave me some semblance of a lesson plan about 2 minutes before the class started and with no book(s). Absolutely terrible.

/flips table

WCS

This is why I choose to teach community college, even if semesters of work aren’t guaranteed. These students (mostly) want to work; I’m not baby-sitting. I genuinely sympathize with you.

Wakezilla

Trust me brother, that’s what I’d rather be doing. Colleges have turned into a picky shit show and it’s getting harder to get/find a job. Even the old 40-40-20 percentage you’re supposed to spend on lectures, publishing and community work has been warped. It sucks.

WCS

Then I’ll do it for you.

WCS

Or, I won’t.

Marc Trestmans Windowless Van

Hall and Oates – Kiss is on my List

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=YOuhYuZLNYw

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Marc Trestmans Windowless Van
WCS

Now we’re cooking with gas.

Marc Trestmans Windowless Van

I love Hall and Oates. I will need to force myself to not post a second one in a row

Marc Trestmans Windowless Van

Beck – Where it’s At. Went mainstream only because it is on my favorite video game soundtrack

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=EPfmNxKLDG4

WCS