Half-Arsed Saturday Thread

King Hippo - February 10, 2024February 9, 2024

You know how some weeks, you wonder if it would be even theoretically possible to give less of a shit? That is Hippo today. And last night, when I wrote this slop. Apologies in advance. Early Bird Special is Everton getting its shit pushed in by City of Men (7:30, USA). I

Monday Morning One-Off Mock Draft

Open Threads

King Hippo - February 5, 2024

113

Hey, guess who TOTES spaced that he agreed to Carpenter sommet out this morning? Watch this, while subbing in Mock Draft with K Hippo! Your assignment, should you choose to accept it, is "Favourite TV series (including mini-series but NOT moviefilms) theme music/song." Wait 30 minutes or 5 picks before you go

Premiership and Afrika – Togetherness Saturday

King Hippo - February 3, 2024February 2, 2024

237

There being no NFL whatsoever, a man is grateful for a full EPL slate, along with the conclusion of the Afrikan Euros' Flacco Eight. Details? Here are a sparse few. Everton is your wake and bake, home to Spurs (7:30, USA). Richarlison returns to Goodison again, he will get a nice

Instant Hippo Micro-Thoughts (Championship Sunday, 2023 Season)

Reflections

King Hippo - January 29, 2024January 28, 2024

Well, merde. The Narrative Owl it is, and one has to root for the Tomsulas. Speaking of, at least they weren't GIVEN anything - they just fucking took that game away. Doing what good teams do, finding an extra reserve of will and urgency, to dig out of a 24-7 halftime

A Bored Murrika Turns Its Eyes to AFRIKA Open Thread!

King Hippo - January 27, 2024January 27, 2024

213

Ugh, another dead/sunless Saturday. No NFL, no Prem. Just more stupid FA Cup ties, including the one I hope Everton loses to Martin Prince's Lutes (10:00, ESPN+) - because it's all hands on deck to keep hold of 17th position in the table. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=0B61XAN2Ujw Fortunately, the wonky coverage of BeIn has us covered,

Instant Hippo Thoughts – Divisional Sunday (2023 Season)

Reflections

King Hippo - January 22, 2024January 21, 2024

We close the Flacco-Free Flacco Eight, with two very good games. One winner more likeable than the other, but such is life. Fuck or Walk time is upon us, and the Lions? Well, they FUCKED. Was a slow burn, this game. Two heavyweight boxers feeling each other out. DET gets 3, MRSA

Void Remains, Week Two

King Hippo - January 20, 2024January 19, 2024

104

Count down the hours until Scotchy heralds in our last full NFL weekend. Oy. Another weird Prem weekend, two fixtures per day. Arsenal will likely disembowel Palace for the early risers (7:30, USA), followed by a broadcast network-televised slap fight between Robins Hood and Praise Beesus (12:30, NBC). Only one watchable game

Instant Hippo Thoughts – Wild Card Sunday (2023 Season)

Reflections

King Hippo - January 15, 2024January 14, 2024

How mad do y'all think Jerral is, that he has to wait until after MLK Day to rage-fire Mike McCarthy? How much iced cream do you reckon the latter ate after the game? To infinity and beyond we goes. I have often scoffed at notions of "momentum" and over-thinking things like the

Instant Hippo Thoughts – Wild Card Saturday (2023 Season)

Reflections

King Hippo - January 14, 2024January 13, 2024

I don't really have much to say - but what the hell. A Sunday morning placeholder, I guess! NBC's matinee was a pretty compelling football match, for about 35 minutes of play. #ThePauls even led 14-10 in Q2! I know, it was cray. Back and forth, and it looked pretty even.

Wild Card Weekend Warmups!

King Hippo - January 13, 2024January 11, 2024

What tasty treats await us all - presuming one is staying inside watching TV. God help you if you are ATTENDING the Saturday night Chefs/Fins tilt. Your bollocks are likely to freeze plum off. Or, I suppose, your lady bollocks (sorry, TayTay). But first, Lesser Footy awaits. The Prem is thankfully

JV NFL Finale Open Thread

King Hippo - January 8, 2024January 8, 2024

156

One last hurrah for Hippo's favoUrite banner pic! Washington (+5.5) v. Michigan (7:30, ESPN) Oh man, this line just keeps creeping up. I have a really bad feeling, and it's worse than the usual (gas). Polar opposites clash tonight. There's the smug superiority (undeserved) epitomized by the Michigan Man - of whom Lesser

Instant Hippo Thoughts – Week 18, 2023 Season

Reflections

King Hippo - January 8, 2024January 7, 2024

This is the end, my imaginary friends. The end. I mean, for the regular season. And of course, Happy Afrikan-American Monday, for all who celebrate (nods in Ron Rivera). Team WKRP will not be going to the playoffs, but (i) at least they didn't go winless in the division; and (ii)