More Football You Say? Your Sunday Night NYG/Dallas Open Thread

That was a great day, wasn’t it? Remember when that guy scored? I didn’t think it would happen. But that guy that got injured-that was a bad break. But at least the home team won, right? And the cheerleaders, oh the cheerleaders! That rookie is going to be something special, isn’t he? But that vet-I thought he was going to be okay but it’s obvious the years have taken their toll. And that team that is 1-0? Who could have seen that coming? So much to discuss at the water cooler tomorrow!

NYG vs Dal: Hey Romo, here’s your early Xmas present-Giants starting safeties Brandon Collins (a rookie) and Cooper Taylor ( I assume he is a developmentally-challenged hobo that hides in a shopping cart when on the sidelines). If the Cowboys D falters a bit we may get a shoot-out but the talent levels between these teams is significant. Eli likes turtles.

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The Mighty Feklahr

Luckily the Giants have Romo to keep them in this game.

entropy

I have “Romoception” in the clipboard, ready to go.

Doktor Zymm

GIVE ME AN F!
F!
GIVE ME A U!
U!
GIVE ME A C!
C!
GIVE ME A K!
K!
WHAT’S THAT SPELL?
DALLAS!
FUCK DALLAS!

Sill Bimmons

FUCK DALLAS

Infinite Jets

DanFuel
KraftDings

phisherman

Went to pick up daughter at work; wife snagged control of the TV; now I’m watching Guy’s grocery games instead of football. Not looking up for your pal phisherman this evening.

Martin

I suggest murder.

litre_cola

Guy Fieri or Chris Collinsowrth you got one bullet, what are ya gunna do?

entropy

Have them stand beside each other and hope the bullet will penetrate a skull three times?

ballsofsteelandfury

Get them to hug.

IronAvenger6491

Nervous? I don’t think I expect anything less than mediocrity for this season.

If they finish above 500. or at it, i’ll be happy.

Covalent Blonde

I need you to be Eliath tonight, Manning. Be Eliath.

Sill Bimmons

BEARS GONNA EAT THE CHILDREN

Sill Bimmons

hey guys

phisherman

Hi Dr. Sill

Sill Bimmons

sup

IronAvenger6491

double post

The Mighty Feklahr

Joe Flacco and Jay Cutler are who we thought they were.

makeitsnowondem

Springsteen is a Giants fan, right? How do the Cowboys get back to The River?

Beastmode Ate My Baby

Aha! Another reason to loathe Springsteen!

Lothar of the Hill People

So, help me out here:

Cheerleader kick lines. They’re pretty much just to bait men into staring at women’s vaginas, right?

litre_cola

Micheals good, Collinsworth cancer.

IronAvenger6491

fuck you Dez

Bloody Lethal

Please Lord let them just be OK tonight please please.

How many Martinis has Al drunk? How many Collies has Cris molested?

entropy

Al sounds like he’s having the slowest stroke in the world.

The Mighty Feklahr

BOOOOO I want Faith Hill back!

Beastmode Ate My Baby

We all do.

ballsofsteelandfury

That wasn’t her?

drpeppermd

Carrie Underwood has done the theme for the last 3 years. But one blond country singer is as good as another, I guess.

Doktor Zymm

Jerry World…ugh, I curdle at the thought

Gratliff

Pat Benatar has to be rich as fuck after all these years of torturous SNF openings

ballsofsteelandfury

You would think but I think she is getting ripped off on this.

Lothar of the Hill People

You mean Joan Jett.

drpeppermd

Joan Jett. Unless I missed your subtle joke.

Doktor Zymm

GO LARGE HUMANS! BOO COW HERDERS!

entropy

This could be a long game for you.

Doktor Zymm

Oh, I’m aware the Cowfuckers are better than the Giants. I’m just drunk enough that my hate has turned to hope. FUCK DALLAS.

litre_cola

Agreed wholeheartedly

entropy

I have an irrational hate for all things Texas, but I am worried were gonna see Wall Candy Eli and not semi-competent Eli tonight.

Bloody Lethal

I’m here with you Zymm.

JerryJones-Thugs-N-Harmony

Who face times after a first date?

entropy

Unless you want to show someone something like, “you have to see what this fucker did NOW,” who Facetimes at all?

JerryJones-Thugs-N-Harmony

I can see FaceTime for talking to parents or a partner that’s out of town

ballsofsteelandfury

Was it a sexy Facetime? That’s the only possible explanation.

JerryJones-Thugs-N-Harmony

That Verizon or Comsat commercial question with rashida jones leaves a lot of questions

John Difool

Is Tony Dungy on a hunger strike or something?

entropy

See my comment re: a tapeworm earlier.

Moonbatting Average

Well, the gays ARE marrying all over the place

Martin

Maybe he has AIDS.

John Difool

It’s official I’ve know heard the word ‘fanduel’ more times in one single day than I’ve heard any other word in my entire 44 year existence.

Senor Weaselo

The worst IMO is the analysts/announcers making references to it even like “Oh, so-and-so had a big day. You know who must be happy? The people who have him on Fanduel.”

ballsofsteelandfury

And yet Al Michaels had to tiptoe around the Steelers’ late garbage time push.

JerryJones-Thugs-N-Harmony

cant wait for lockup: Cleveland Browns

//would’ve made this joke earlier but spent the day outside

IronAvenger6491

i like medium well, or just well.

entropy

At least…. At least he didn’t request ketchup? I’m trying to help.

Senor Weaselo

That’s automatic death, right?

entropy

Anybody here watch Longmire? “I don’t have time to make another fortune… I do have time to make another son.”

JustStopDude

I want to be able to still make out the stun gun marks. Basically get it above room temperature.

Martin

Don’t feed the fucker then.

Lord Joe Don Looney

With grass-fed beef, I have the grill super hot.
Salt pepper then sear both sides.
Let it rest.
Then enjoy.
Well done is just wrong.

Defensive Back Mike Wallace

Peyton Manning: Losing feeling in my arm.

Senor Weaselo

Relying on my defense.

Update:
comment image

JerryJones-Thugs-N-Harmony

It’s amazing the drop in quality NBC has from their epl coverage to their NFL coverage

It’s probably the equivalent of the divide between FX and Fox. Networks are a whole different animal than cable networks.

entropy

Does Dungy have a tapeworm? He looks emaciated.

Infinite Jets

He’s on a hunger strike in solidarity with Kim Davis? Only nobody told him she got out of jail.

Lothar of the Hill People

His ears are getting bigger. I think they’re symbiotes feeding on his body fat.

Covalent Blonde

So…. is this just the first year that I have noticed Tappen covering the NFL or has she jumped ship from the NHL?

ballsofsteelandfury

I’ve never seen Sweet Dee cover the NFL.

Covalent Blonde

It’s so very true! She was wonderful for the NHL and I am super afraid this may be a career move.

ballsofsteelandfury

Which sucks, because she is really good on the NHL.

IronAvenger6491

This Metal Gear V game is fun.

entropy

I cannot wait for Fallout IV.

JustStopDude

Same here. I have no clue when I will ever have time to play it but its the only video game I am interested in playing.

IronAvenger6491

Between Fallout 4, MGS V and the Witcher III, it’s gonna be hard to pick a game of the year.

Moonbatting Average

I can’t hear you over the sound of Forza 6 dropping in a couple days

Doktor Zymm

I’m lame and still playing Dragon Age

Martin

I’m not a nerd. I don’t play video games.

blackroseMD1

I have it setting on my computer ready to play, but the Mad Max game has me by the soul at the moment.

Bloody Lethal

Ever do something fun and look up and it’s 4 hours later? That’s Metal Gear except x30 billion.

entropy

Romo carrying water for the Shield. “It’s special to be here, special to be a part of this.”

Martin
Defensive Back Mike Wallace

Rodney Harrison: Winston will be a good #1 draft pick. Just look at Eric Fisher.

JerryJones-Thugs-N-Harmony

How is Winston going to be a good player? He was shitty against pretty weak acc defenses in college?

Defensive Back Mike Wallace

It’s a good thing Auburn had that miracle TD return in the 2013 Iron Bowl. Otherwise, Bama would’ve had a field day against Winston.

Martin

He isn’t a good player. That’s the joke.

Senor Weaselo

Applewood smoked rotisserie chicken. It is a wonderful thing that you can pick things like that up at a store.

Doktor Zymm

The down side to going out to watch games is having to wear all the clothes. Home and down to just 2 items. LET US SEE SOME SUNDAY NIGHT FB!

Doktor Zymm

Nah, it’s a T-shirt and leopard panties. Also, I got a better ass than she does.

John Difool

Manningface and Romobyl to kick off the first Sunday night of the season. It doesn’t get any better than this

litre_cola

Does one of them have only one leg?

entropy

Nope. Behind the blonde. They’re very cuddly, these two.

JustStopDude

I would be okay with the Federal Government outlawing all fantasy football just to stop these fucking draft king commercials.

entropy

I kinda want Andy Samberg to come rushing in as those guys celebrate and Falcon Punch them when they least expect it.

JustStopDude
Martin

That ended unexpectedly.

ballsofsteelandfury

But, somehow, sportsbooks are evil. FUCK YOU GOODELL!

Senor Weaselo

In fairness, I do want a giant check. I just don’t want to play Draft Kings to get it.

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=020sZ0PY8ko

JerryJones-Thugs-N-Harmony

Bruce Arians looked like he was auditioning for the life aquatic 2 in his post game interview

makeitsnowondem

All right, guys. Off to cook some garlic lime chicken and drink some Texas whiskey for a bit. Hoping to be back for the game.

Martin

What is in the water that gives so many English girls giant tits?

Doktor Zymm

When does PK’s MMQB column usually come out on Mondays? I have an idea…

Martin

Between 6–8am EST

entropy

It’s better than coffee for waking you up AND making you pants-shittingly angry in minutes.

JustStopDude

For the LOVE OF GOD….someone please take the ring away from Dungy. Its turning him into that troll thing from the movie!

Martin

He was already Gollum before the ring.

JustStopDude

Really coach…the Jews were behind the loss?!?

And it was meant to be a pooch kick? GET THE FUCK OUT!

JustStopDude

How screwed up is it that NBC makes me pine for the shitheads that are on Fox.

makeitsnowondem

Oh, whoa, James Jones is still good.

Doktor Zymm

I hate Dallas winning anything, but Dallas will probably win this game. I miss accidentally competent Eli.

ballsofsteelandfury

Excellent job on these open threads, scotchnaut!

IronAvenger6491

Welp, it’s a brand new Giants and the only question i have is, when do i stop chugging the bleach…

IronAvenger6491

Clorox sounds great

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