Ten mother-lovin’ games? Better get to work…
Car @ Hou: The Hoyer Era lasted a wee bit shorter than the length of one football game. Congrats coaching staff, no matter who you play at QB going forward you’ll have to answer a boatload of questions about the guy you didn’t start. Kuechly’ (no matter how you spell it, it looks wrong) is out today but the Panther D shouldn’t have much of a problem against the Texans. Where’s Greg Olsen? Nowhere to be found last week. He had only two targets.
SF @ Pit: Hyde went bananas last week and Bush is out (surprise!) so look for more of the same. If Kap spies a gap he should be off and running-the Steelers secondary is iffy. TE Davis may be able to take advantage of the same situation. Brown has a minimum 5 catches and 50 yards for an NFL record 33 consecutive games-the second longest active streak is 4. I thought Wheaton would take advantage of Bryant not being around. That has not been the case.
TB @ NO: Both teams are 0-1 but this division battle will have no ramifications in the future. Winston looked overwhelmed last week just as he did in the preseason. Evans should be ready to go-adjust your lineups accordingly. How ’bout that disconnect between lousy QB play and points expected to be garnered by a quality WR in fantasy? Brees threw 48 times last week. The Wolf Man bulldozed the Saints to 31st in the league in total defense last year. I wonder what he’s got up his sleeve this time around. Colston has had a great run but it looks as though his knees have gone the way of the fax machine.
Det @ Min: As we learned last week, Stafford has been in the league X number of years and still gets rattled by blitz packages. The Lions D is goig to fall from a top 5 unit to somewhere in the middle of the pack.As yeah right said, “give AP the damn ball!” That should solve a number of problems for the offence in general and Bridgewater in particular. Maybe the coaching staff had him on a “carry count”? Otherwise, it doesn’t make sense.
Ari @ Chi: Ellington is out so Johnson (Chris) and Johnson (David) will clean up the running game. I think Andre will come back to a muddled RBBC situation. Palmer picked up where he left off last season. A Warner-like renaissance for him? I’d like to see it. It’s imperative that Allen get pressure on Palmer early. Jeffrey’s hamstring is acting up-if he’s out Patrick Peterson is going to take the next WR out of the game so that leaves Bennett at TE as the only viable threat in the passing game. I don’t like the Bears chances.
NE @ Buff: Rex said that everyone wants them to beat the Pats and he is right. Gronk has scored 9 TD’s in 7 games against the Bills but is generally limited against Ryan defenses. McCoy is questionable so we may see a whole lot of Boobie. Buffalo looked amazing last week and in the preseason as well. Brady doesn’t do well against pressure and this Bills D can deliver on that front.
SD @ CIN: The Chargers D held Megatron to 2 catches-can they do the same to Green? Allen, Green, Floyd, Gordon, Woodhead, Oliver and Gates later on-Rivers has a ton of toys to play with this year. Cincy has no injured players! It doesn’t matter. It is very important for Hill to chew up the clock so that Rivers doesn’t get on the field.
Ten @ Cle: The huge story this week is that Terrance West returns to Cleveland to wreak mediocrity and take a seat on the bench. Mariota, huh? What happened last week? McCown is out and Bowe is questionable, which in this business is known as addition by subtraction.
Atl @ NYG: Ryan shouldn’t have any problems unless he’s terrified by invisible pass rushes. Tevin Coleman looks to be the guy in the Falcons backfield. Say a prayer for the Giants secondary-Julio Jones is in town. Vic Beasley against Ereck Flowers-who ya got? There is a 50-50 chance that the Giants could be 0-3 five days from now. (they meet Wash. on Thursday)
StL @ Was: St. Lou ambushed Seattle last week and should take their opponent out behind the woodshed this week. My buddy Cunningham didn’t embarrass himself last week. The jury is still out on Foles though he didn’t throw a pic last week. Rashad Ross scored 4 TD’s in preseason and is looking for his first in real play. He replaces D-Jax this week.
Clausen almost turned into Relish.
Bengals and Chargers both agreeing they don’t really feel like playing the rest of this quarter.
Soooooooooooo, which of the plethora of games is the best to continue my weekend of absolutely zero work – in which I have maintained a very healthy balance of grog intake whilst plundering and pliiaging – and drink for every herpity derpity derp?
http://stream1.gifsoup.com/view/454859/a-plethora-of-pinatas-o.gif
You really need an excuse to…
http://i.imgur.com/xvdbOvR.gif
I look forward to Week 3 when Le’Veon comes back and I have a fucking prayer in teh fantasy again.
Holy fuck the Simpsons are still on the air?!?!
Dear god why????
http://stream1.gifsoup.com/view2/1554613/we-ve-got-to-have-money-o.gif
Flags flagos the god of flags demands more flags.
“Rogers-Cromartie doing a great job on Julio Jones. He’s only got 7 catches. That’s a lot of catches but…”
-Announcer
dammit chargers
GingerDERP
That was a damn fumble. Fuck you NFL rulebook.
Chevrolet: Our initial quality is excellent. 5 minutes in to your ownership…well, you know how everyone says domestic automobiles suck?
I got to give State Farm credit…I thought their commercials could not get more annoying…but reaching back to an old SNL skit that was never funny in the first place, is a think of genius.
Would have loved to have sat in that pitch meeting.
Scratch that because watching some asshole get paid missions for coming up with that shit is enough to make me go full insane.
c’moooooon tuck rule!
How does Washington fuck up the 2nd half? I’m dying to know…
By coming out in the 2nd half.
They will use some blankets left for them by Patriots in Pittsburgh.
I’m really glad Antonio Brown keeps getting the Steelers down the field only for Rapistburger to hand off to Williams, who is playing for my opponent, vulturing TDs and entirely negating all of Brown’s points.
Bills get the score they needed and Carpenter Bills the point after.
Can we bring back the Giraffe so that Mike Evans can actually get a ball thrown to him?
If this Falcons-Giants game just becomes a game of HORSE between Julio and OBJ, that’s fine with me and probably everyone else.
That’s a GREAT idea!
http://33.media.tumblr.com/2be0cfcacc26bd99f40bd9061db97090/tumblr_nmgraq6LLS1rj9gfno2_250.gif
People in this bar are still screaming about how much they hate Jay Cutler. Will they grow to appreciate him when the emu does his thang?
I’m sure this man will endear himself to the Ditkas.
https://www.google.com/url?sa=i&rct=j&q=&esrc=s&source=images&cd=&cad=rja&uact=8&ved=0CAcQjRxqFQoTCPKjl4KehsgCFQM3PgodB40BMA&url=http%3A%2F%2Flarrybrownsports.com%2Ffootball%2Fbears-jimmy-clausen-light-it-up%2F250467&psig=AFQjCNEyqSnIrH2-1W9bZW8WywjCqmRQUg&ust=1442859785853867
Buffalo kicker ending it wide…how original…
Did Cutler get injured, or did they just get tired of him shedding on the field?
Looked like he fucked up his shoulder trying to tackle his interceptor.
They wanted to give him a pain shot but he ran off and hid behind the dresser.
#BillsMafia
Nice of you to join us this year, Teddy.
http://www.nfl.com/videos/nfl-game-highlights/0ap3000000534203/Can-t-Miss-Play-Adrian-Peterson-49-yard-run
BILLSDOWN
Watching Giants game, just heard “It’s 10-10 at Mid-Wife Stadium”.
The Jimmy Clausen era (Re)Begins (Again)!
PICKLE TIME IN CHI TOWN
…and Catler iz ded.
The Jimmy Clausen era is drawing nigh.
The Clausen era begins.
Classic Browns. Even when they do something amazing they lose.
/LAWYERED
Annnnnnnnnnnnnnnd there’s the Cutler pick-6.
Mariotta fuck up saved by Mariotta fuck up…
Big Ben has a new bae.
“Jay Cutler is perfect so far, 8 for 8…”
[throws pick six]
Jimmy Clausen warming up!!!
::Check’s FF opponent::
I have a streak going? Doooooon’t caaaaaare.
http://38.media.tumblr.com/b03249f73dc9be818835f577b994e4e2/tumblr_mk3hsumw6d1qav77to6_250.gif
As Cutler throws a pick then missed the tackle to save the TD.
Oh my God. That was hilarious.
Jesus, the Titans really ought to get themselves an O line.
Sup all? Just watching ARI’s D underperform against Cutler.
#7uck
Jebus, the 49ers are a dumpster fire.
Get a damn score Bills.
I’m fairly certain Lincoln is paying Matthew McConnaghey in weed.
The 2015 9ers have finally showed up
Josh Scobee is very cut, isn’t he.
Josh is gonna Scobee looking for a new job.
Pitt is slapping the 9ers down.
Theyre getting the Rhianna treatment.
Janay Rice is now 49ers Assistant Coach in Apologizing.
http://i.imgur.com/HfyI2.gif
Pittsburgh might not attempt a PAT again.
HEYWARD BEY DID A GOOD
Scobee scobee’d that PAT.