Your Monday, Not At All Funday Open Thread

Your job sucks, the apartment/house is a mess but you don’t feel like cleaning , the kids/dog/wife/girlfriend/boyfriend is/are howling at you-you need some peace, don’t you? Well here comes good old football to fill the void that family and loved ones can’t. Now just pull up your Chevy Silverado to the old TV, crack open a Bud Lite, and get face deep into a bag of Doritos while you wait for the Papa Johns to arrive. All better? All better. Now remember this feeling tomorrow morning when you get that twitch that tells you to plow into that damn crossing guard. GOD, Could She Take Any Longer To Walk Halfway Out Onto The Road And Back?

KC @ GB: She’s gonna be a sloppy one tonight folks. I checked the weather for the area and it’s 72 degrees but it feels like, ah, 72. There’s a 100% chance of rainy days and Mondays getting you down, as a skeleton once chirped. Here’s something to wrap your noodle around-Smith is only 4 yds behind Rodgers in passing yards. Rodgers pulls way ahead in overall charisma and endorsements though. The Packers rush D is a bit confused these days-they gave 141 yards to Forte but only 41 to Marshawn. JC will end up somewhere in the middle with some receiving yards to boot. Lacy and Davante Adams are listed as probable and if you tune in you can say that you were there when the WR TD drought ended because the Chiefs listed Kelce at the position. IT WAS THE ONLY WAY IT WAS GOING TO HAPPEN. Andy Reid is chewing the fat right now, trying to figure out what to do with CB Jamell Fleming. QB’s that pass on Fleming have a 111 rating. Guess where Rodgers is going to focus his energies? Hopefully, Justin Houston will get some pressure on Rodgers. Who the heck is Houston? He’s the guy that isn’t JJ Watt because the former actually led the league in sacks last year. The knowledge-I dropped it on you.

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WCS

Moose -The End Is Well Nigh
Moose -The End Is Well Nigh

Well, miscellaneous trivia.

Sophia Loren about Jayne Mansfield:

She came right for my table. She knew everyone was watching. She sat down. And now, she was barely… Listen. Look at the picture. Where are my eyes? I’m staring at her nipples because I am afraid they are about to come onto my plate. In my face you can see the fear. I’m so frightened that everything in her dress is going to blow—BOOM!—and spill all over the table.

http://41.media.tumblr.com/a2062ec5d7adc847b3a0b2a797812833/tumblr_nrs7vzRbPj1rbm7i0o1_1280.jpg

Moose -The End Is Well Nigh

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BrettFavresColonoscopy

I wanted to see a bigger rout…in either direction

Doktor Zymm

Holy shit, worth staying up to watch Ray Lewis go full on something.

Doktor Zymm
Porky Prime

M-O-O-N, that spells “shit”.

blackroseMD1

Well, an almost guaranteed fantasy win turned into a loss, and I didn’t even have any booze to make it better.

Guess it’s about that time…

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nomonkeyfun
Moose -The End Is Well Nigh
Doktor Zymm

Oh look, the Packers won. Who saw that coming.

JustStopDude

KC just take a fucking knee. Smith can only throw a 7 yard “hail mary”…

JustStopDude

Or a fucking sack…I guess that is more poetic…

makeitsnowondem

lady snow’s making me drink the rest of her Lazy Magnolia 10. She’s forever leaving me wounded soldiers, and I love her for it.

Old School Zero

I see you’ve found yourself an excellent enabler.

King Hippo

DOES SHE HAVE A FRIEND WHO LEAVES AROUND UNWANTED PILL BOTTLES??

nomonkeyfun

That is woman you have to put a ring on, unless she’s giving you sideeyes right now.

JustStopDude

Fuck it…gonna show up to the shrink’s office hung over in the morning…

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Porky Prime

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King Hippo

THAT’S GOOD HUSTLE

/slap your shrink on the ass, HARD

The Maestro

Jamaal Charles just single-handedly got me a come-from-behind-by-30-points win tonight in fantasy. Thank you, you beautiful dreadlocked bastard.

blackroseMD1

Jeremy Maclin single-handedly gave me a loss.

Of all the nights for a damn Chiefs WR to catch a TD.

Moose -The End Is Well Nigh
Moose -The End Is Well Nigh
Old School Zero

Games seem a bit long this year. Or maybe I just forgot.

Doktor Zymm

Crap, I never got around to running a time series analysis of Duracell stock vs. Eagles stats. Turns out Duracell was sold by P&G to Berkshire in 2014, and doesn’t have it’s own independent stock. Maybe I should try a different brand.

Senor Weaselo

I’m guessing Energizer’s a subsidiary too?

nomonkeyfun

Is it considered proper form to throw reachable batteries?

Doktor Zymm

There is Energizer Holdings. Has more than just the batteries, but that’ll probably work.

Porky Prime

Are you sure they don’t just save money and use cheap Sunbeam heavy duties from the Dollar Tree?

Porky Prime

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