Your Very First Monday Afternoon Open Thread

What’s on your mind? Me? Jackson Browne’s “Running On Empty” has been on my brain for the last two weeks. I sure as hell am not going to tell you that it’s the song of all songs-it’s just there. Every day. It is god damn relentless. If someone could distract me while I attempt to watch an entire Blue Jays game for the first time in 25 years, that would be great. Seriously, what are you up to?

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Oh damn missed a Rivers freakout closeup.

Romonobyl

I’m sure there will be more.

Spur

Floyd had 7 yards but he decided to run backwards and only get 2

Sill Bimmons

Lawrence Timmons: pretty badass for a 3-4 ILB.

packman_jon

So, OSZ, Sunday, huh.

makeitsnowondem

More like SUNDAY HUH WHAT HUH FUCK YOU

Old School Zero

Guhhhhhhhh

Senor Weaselo

Is it bad that I’m rooting for a Chargers TD so I get the tiebreaker score right for the DFO pools?

Spur

Steelers getting check downed to death.

So how many John Rockers is Chase Utley to Mets fans?

nomonkeyfun

He has reached Potvin levels of NYC hatred.

Wakezilla

For a shitty team, the Giants sure get a lot of prime time games.

WCS

The same could be said for the Stillers…

King Hippo

Both have a nationwide following of portly, frustrated, loud fans.

His Right Honorable Lord Lordship the Lordly

They only fucking show 6 teams on primetime.

packman_jon

“Because fuck you, Giants fans, that’s why”

makeitsnowondem

Feeling extremely optimistic about Extra Drinking Period tonight.

Sill Bimmons

For me it’s just Extra Wasting Weed Period.

Please end in regulation, game.

Romonobyl

That turf is wetter than a cucumber in a women’s prison.

entropy

Rivers threw that ball down like it was an unbaptised child.

packman_jon

I thought sorcery was frowned upon in Christianity?

makeitsnowondem

I think you guys should be nicer to Markus Hweaton.

Spur

So that just happened

King Hippo

annnnnddddd just like magic, this shit game is great. FOOTBAW!!!!!!

Romonobyl

That just happened.

entropy

Oh, I think we can still criticize Mike Vick, Gruden. I think we can do that for YEARS.

Sill Bimmons

welp

WCS

Uh…

Brick Meathook
JustStopDude

That movie and its sequel are criminally underrated.

Sill Bimmons

We’re gonna get you down, and down safe.

http://www.themoviescene.co.uk/reviews/_img/838-3.jpg

Brick Meathook

I don’t know about the sequel, but “Airplane!” is consistently listed as one of the funniest movies of all time.

Sill Bimmons

“Could Landry Jones be any worse?”

— Said no one ever until Oct. 12, 2015 at 11:06 PM EDT.

entropy

Fuck you Keyshawn.

Old School Zero

Wheeeeee

Old School Zero

Noooooo

Wakezilla

Holy shit this Papa Johns commercial!

“Ladies, do you hate it when your husband plays dress up with your daughters because he looks like a cross dressing tranny who you wouldn’t want to bang? Give him our shitty pizza with some hot sauce and he’ll be a man again!”

Romonobyl

Served up some homemade gyros with pita and rice pilaf for victuals tonight. I you don’t have a decent Greek joint nearby ( I do, but it’s closed this late), it’s worth a shot. A grill with a rotisserie is a must.

packman_jon

The city’s best Gyros place is a few blocks away from my place. Packgirl loves that place. She got me liking gyros too

Spur

Did Rivers punch his throwing glove?

Spur

A happy Rivers is a pissed off Rivers.

makeitsnowondem

Antonio Gates is going to be the first player in NFL history to go into the Hall of Fame as a power forward.

Sill Bimmons

SHUT UP ABOUT RIVERS GRUDEN HE’S PUT UP 17 POINTS ON A BOTTOM 10 DEFENSE

entropy

But he’s so impressive!

JustStopDude

Thrown three TD’s this game. I mean honestly…he is responsible for the majority of both team’s points.

Brick Meathook

FUCK YOU CAMERAMAN

WCS

Rut roh

Sill Bimmons

Game.

Romonobyl

ODB woulda caught that with his pinkie finger alone.

Brick Meathook

FLOOOOOOAAAATTTTTTTT

entropy

Every time they show Woodhead, they should quick cut to Jon Favruea from Rudy saying, “HE’S SO LITTLE!!!!”

packman_jon

“He’s so little”
– Deanna Favre, c 1989

Spur

Woodhead can average 6 y/c but Gordon can barely stay positive.

packman_jon

The lunchpail adds 6 yards imo

Sill Bimmons

I hate that little fucker.

Mother Puncher

*gritty fucker

Romonobyl

I’m one 3 and out from watching Dancing With the Stars my wife saved on the DVR cable device.

nomonkeyfun

The Mets crowd is bloodthirsty. They’ve been chanting “We want Utley,” all night.

entropy

Fuck Utley with a broken axe handle.

Wakezilla

Hey man, he’s always good for a game of catch with his biggest fan.

nomonkeyfun

Fuck Utley with a sharp axe head. Then maybe shove a rusty hammer up there.

Spur

I’ve been watching all night waiting for something to happen and I hate baseball.

King Hippo

Unlike a Yankees crowd, a Mets crowd really WILL cut a fucker.

entropy

True story: I used to go to Mets games in Philly just looking for fights. I once walked up on six guys shouting horrible, racial things to a kid and his mom as they walked by, kicked someone’s feet off their own cooler, reach in for a beer, and cracked it. No one said a word. Fuck Philly fans. Mets fans? I’d be part of the new Meadowlands I did that shit to them.

nomonkeyfun

Damn straight. Our stadium isn’t filled with a bunch corporate banker fuckheads.
As much as I hate to say it we’re the dirt Jets.
We just don’t ask women to show their tits.

Sill Bimmons

I used to live a block away from the best Mexican restaurant in the Philly area.

God I miss that place.

Moonbatting Average

I moved to my new neighborhood in no small part because of the abundant authentic Mexican food. It’s essential for quality of life

King Hippo

Sigh. What’s the #1 migraine trigger after aspartame? EVERYTHING that’s in Mexican food. High end, low end, same difference. 48 hours of agony.

Being alive is the fucking worst, man.

Moonbatting Average

Are you allergic to good things?

King Hippo

pretty much, yeah. At least 90% of good things make me puke, give me a migraine, or both.

FANTASTIC for weight loss, though.

entropy

I’m north of Philly and we have a bunch of good ones here. I’m rather pleased by that.

Romonobyl

I live in the cradle of Tex-Mex…and take advantage of that frequently.

JustStopDude

I had a place outside of Baltimore. Best beef tongue tacos I have had in my life.

Wakezilla

/flips to Raw, sees some Taker/Lesnar montage
*2 hours later

/flips to Raw and the SAME Lesnar/Taker montage is on.

I’ll just assume they’ve played the same thing on loop for hours.

Brick Meathook
Martin

WHY DON’T I REMEMBER THIS!?!??!?

King Hippo

Since we are talking lawyer assholes, the single biggest one I’ve dealt with (in practice since 1998) has been a Chicagoan, from just this past summer. In general, though, BASTAHN is reliably the worst. The NY types are assholes, but more in the abrupt way, instead of the snide, rub your nose in it fashion.

Sill Bimmons

That car makes absolutely no goddamn sense.

entropy

Professional drivers on closed course. Under no circumstances should you attempt to drive our cars.

Romonobyl

Is this what we were begging for all spring?

WCS

Just proves we’re all masochists.

King Hippo

Even with all the quality teevee in my DVR…I will miss this slop tomorrow. Miss it BAD.

entropy

Eight passing yards since the first quarter. Can we switch to a high school or Pop Warner game now?

Wakezilla

Did San Diego just score points? I swear I’m watching and am wondering why the Chargers just kicked off

Moonbatting Average

Last 3 suicide picks: Texans, Chargers, Giants. Still alive! I’m thinking Vikings or Jets next week. I’m approaching this like Christopher Walken in Deer Hunter.

WCS

Dri Archer: Still pointless