Your AFC North-Centric Thursday Night “Showdown” Open Thread

[manages to briefly tear himself away from “The Case For Christmas” starring Dean Cain as a lawyer defending Santa Claus/ignoring the good woman who loves him dearly] I’d like to catch AFC North fever but I’m not an anti-vaccer-I’ve had my shots.

Cle @ Cin: Johnny Hypeball gets the start tonight and it’ll be a rough one. A few of the starting  WR’s that he doesn’t have a rapport with (Hawkins, Hartline) are out. He still has Barnidge and Benjamin but I think their better-than-you’d-expect stats have more to do with McCown’s great play under trying circumstances than with their own ability. I may be wrong but it won’t be the 374th time. (I keep track-it’s WAY over 400) I look forward to John-Boy scrambling needlessly, shovel-passing, throwing off his back foot, side-arming and getting intercepted tonight and being arrested for shoplifting in a small town ten years from now. I’m petty like that. Dalton. How is he doing what he’s doing? Well the ground game is a lot better, you say. “Shut up”, I say, “they’re ranked 18th in average yards per game! What the hell are you talking about?” Ginger has taken a major leap forward because of…[returns to watching The Case For Christmas]

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Brick Meathook
Moose -The End Is Well Nigh
blordinaryfagicmox

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nomonkeyfun

I see the young lady on the right has put on her Aussie formalwear.

blordinaryfagicmox

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theeWeeBabySeamus

Hell, I got time to get a Fargo ep in, maybe two, before i pass out.
Nite all.

entropy

This season is getting soooo good. Enjoy.

Moose -The End Is Well Nigh
entropy

She’s got the lungs for it.

BrettFavresColonoscopy

Thanks for the football-like product. Night, all.

Sill Bimmons

womp womp

entropy

I’m going right from the end of this “game” to tonight’s Elementary because I love me some Lucy Lui and Johnny Lee Miller was fucking Sickboy in Trainspotting, AND he married super young Hackers-era Angelina Jolie. Man deserves some respect.

Sill Bimmons

He was also the second best Big Bad on Dexter THAT’S RIGHT I SAID IT SEASON FIVE WAS AWESOME COME AT ME

entropy

Couldn’t get into Dexter after someone told me to read the first novel first and it was so laughably bad I couldn’t finish it.

Sill Bimmons

Watch through Season Five.

It works a lot better as a show.

Moose -The End Is Well Nigh

But Giada, I masturbate TO YOU.

entropy

How do you think she knows which souls to harvest?

Moose -The End Is Well Nigh

The freshly cleaned TV screens?

theeWeeBabySeamus

What is….The friend whose house you always wanted to go for sleepovers?

Moose -The End Is Well Nigh

Missing dog. Beloved pet.
Answers to Laika.
If found please call 1-800-555-9873.
http://40.media.tumblr.com/ff8cc9b4bc4ca3b51606f1798c9b9bf5/tumblr_nx8z47yZ2M1qcbrp0o2_1280.jpg

Brick Meathook

I’VE LOVED SPACE TRAVEL SINCE I WAS A BOY BUT I HATE HATE HATE THE STORY OF LAIKA. AT LEAST OUR CHIMP CAME HOME EVEN IF HE WANTED TO KILL ANY NASA SMOCK WEARER WHO CAME WITHIN THREE FEET OF HIM. OUR CHIMP CAME HOME ALIVE. FUCK THE USSR.

entropy

Fuck the USSR, love Laika.

Brick Meathook
Sharkbait

Still not making up 21 points in 3 minutes factory. Back to work with you.

Sill Bimmons

EASY DOES ER THERE SPECIAL TEAMS COACH STILL DOWN BY 21

entropy

The Browns are awful happy about that blocked punt. Guess they forgot they still need to move the ball about 37 yards for it to matter.

Senor Weaselo

All right, I had to DOWNLOAD A FRIGGIN’ BROWSER because I didn’t want to reset my old one and lose my Kongregate saves. HOW THE FUCK YOU DOIN’, BOYS? And girls, of course.

entropy

That’s good hustle.

Senor Weaselo

I would appreciate a rundown on anything I’ve missed.

entropy

First, the earth cooled, then the dinosaurs came! But they got too big and fat, and they all died and turned into oil. Then the Saudis bought Mercedes Benzes…..

BrettFavresColonoscopy

Pour some gasoline onto this dumpster fire.

Brick Meathook

“Fart Proudly” – Ben Franklin

Brick Meathook
Redshirt

Redshirt to Bengals. Put in the Offensive Backups. Don’t risk an injury.

Sharkbait

Wait. Manziel Ray Rice’d his girlfriend? She must have worn a Browns jersey since apparently he cant hit anything wearing one of those.

BrettFavresColonoscopy

She seems fine, so obviously he couldn’t connect.

Sill Bimmons

MAYBE JUST MAYBE THE QB IS NOT GOOD AT THE FOOTBALLING

BrettFavresColonoscopy

Johnny Manziel: Like an NFL Quarterback but Not Good

entropy

“Son, you’re gonna hold a clipboard real well for some team, some day….”

blordinaryfagicmox

Trumpy played for the Bengals?
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Croooow

First episode I ever saw. Classic.

entropy

I was just notified I won tickets to a local concert last week. To win, you had to state the dumbest thing you did in the last seven days. I said, “I believed the Mets would win the World Series.”

Guy told me he didn’t even hesitate. I won immediately.

I am both happy AND sad right now.

entropy

Christ concert NEXT week, entered the contest last week. I may need more to drink.

theeWeeBabySeamus

I was gonna make a joke about “Christ Concert”, and was Peter, Paul and Mary opening for him.

But last time I did a selective edit joke you got pissed at me so…..

😉

entropy

I didn’t get pissed, I was stuck in a science paper! Engaged the wrong side of my brain, which ought to be a valid legal defense.

theeWeeBabySeamus

That’s what Santa thought until Superman fucked up his defense.

We never did hear how that ended did we. Scotchnaut just kinda left without letting us know if Santa was gonna be doing 8-10 in Sing Sing.

entropy

There was something about a boner, but I got concerned for scotchy at that point, so maybe it’s best we don’t find out how that ended.

Moose -The End Is Well Nigh
theeWeeBabySeamus

I spent a good part of the day today dealing with leaves. I did NOT find anything like that.

I’m not pleased.

nomonkeyfun

A Woman caused The Fall. Never forget that.

King Hippo

Kaylee Hartung at the Mizzou game in rain gear. Me likey.

theeWeeBabySeamus

LMFAO….I saw that too. Plus….well, thhat’s about it. This game sucketh.

Brick Meathook
theeWeeBabySeamus

Shit…..back to Cle/Cincy I guess.
I need more alcohol and beers.

King Hippo

well, fuck. At least neither my money league nor make it snow league foes are starting Eifert. That’s something.

Moose -The End Is Well Nigh
King Hippo

Best day of my life ,, smgdh

Old School Zero

VMB just came, I think.

King Hippo

Hey, at least one of should.

Croooow

As someone who got Dalton and Eifert off the waiver wire, I’m rather pleased right now.

King Hippo

4 team league, huh?

Old School Zero

I want to play against the idiots in your league.

Other commentists are too smart at football.

Croooow

Got them both about a month and a half ago, didn’t think I had a shot when I put in my claims.

BrettFavresColonoscopy

Is this a good time to check if the good people at BACtrack have dropped in today? BACtrack–DFO wants to use your products to know how drunk we are. We accept samples and cash, preferably in combination.

Old School Zero

#BACtoTheFuture

BrettFavresColonoscopy

#BACforwhatever

Moose -The End Is Well Nigh

Murray Eliminator Mark II

*Eliminator of II balls on many a boy.

http://36.media.tumblr.com/32f5b7e4a7df425d169d2718fde8263a/tumblr_nx87djHE6A1r1d5rwo1_1280.jpg

nomonkeyfun

At least they have a place in front of the saddle for all of our girlfriends to sit. You would’t know them, they’re from Saskatoon.

Redshirt
entropy

Small victories,

Sharkbait

Islander fans happy? This concept is foreign to me.

BrettFavresColonoscopy

Throw it to Sanu!

blordinaryfagicmox

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Moose -The End Is Well Nigh

“?quality=100&strip=info&w=600”

That is one damn fine comment!

entropy

Says “quality” right there. How you know it’s good.

blordinaryfagicmox

I thought it was, like, the DFO secret handshake or something

King Hippo

I simply cannot express my admiration enough.

theeWeeBabySeamus

Agreed. She’s outstanding.

Sharkbait

Sad to see her go.

entropy

Her shirt says goodbye, but her face says, “hello….”

theeWeeBabySeamus

Bill Snyder has decided…
Go ahead guys, and embalm me now.

Moose -The End Is Well Nigh
Sharkbait

That pretty much describes this week for me.

BrettFavresColonoscopy

Chris Henry would have broken that…run?

entropy

Yeah, I want to hear Brett “MicroDickPic” Favre call someone ELSE a class act. Consider the source, NFL. Jesus fuck who does your god damn marketing?!

nomonkeyfun

The same people who told Chevy to sell the Nova in Spanish speaking countries.

King Hippo

BayBay FG is NO GOOD! K State can has chance now.

King Hippo

uh, never mind

King Hippo

CHICKEN LADY LOVES LIFE!

Redshirt

Pacman could have ran to Cleveland in the distance he ran for that 2-yard return.

BrettFavresColonoscopy

I was going to avoid the rivebrog tonight for life reasons but I had to stop in to say YES I STARTED THE MAN WHOSE NAME IS AN ANAGRAM FOR ANUS AND HE SCORED A TOUCHDOWN THANK YOU VERY MUCH

entropy

What the fuck? That Mic’d up segment was someone breathing heavy and then shouting out in pleasure. Did they play someone’s porn tab by mistake?

theeWeeBabySeamus

XXX candle mic’d up

evilbeaver8

“He does no steroids” Every Texan who still thinks Lance Armstrong was innocent