Your Sunday Night NFC East Nail-Biter Open Thread

Phi @ Dal: Philly is trying to catch the Giants and Dallas is trying to catch the Slurs and folks at NFL head office are trying to forget that this is a prime time marquee game. Cassel is trying to prove that the Pats, Chiefs, Vikes and Bills were all wrong about him. At 33 I think he’s just about to come into his own. So many others have done the same thing at the same age. Remember that guy? And what about that dude that played for that team back in the [mumbles]? So I say “go for it, fella that’ll be out of the league next year!”

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Romonobyl

OHHHHH that shoulda been a pick.

Rikki-Tikki-Deadly

– stagehand, the night that Jimmy Page first tried using a violin bow on his guitar

Rikki-Tikki-Deadly

More like Josh Muff, amirite?

Gratliff

FFS

Spur

This is all Terrence William’s fault.

Gratliff

Greg Hardy barely has enough energy to hit a bitch!

John Difool

Yea, but he’s 290 so he could still fall on a bitch.

Romonobyl

I know 99.9 of you want a Dallas loss (I think even Zymm), but a win now could possibly set the stage for some hardcore Romobyl when it really matters. So for tonight, GO COWBOYS!!!! Right?

Sharkbait

Eh. Dez and Matthews can’t score. Other than that…DANCE FOR MY AMUSEMENT PUPPETS

Doktor Zymm

Your hope is adorable.

blordinaryfagicmox

french fried onions, how do they work?

Romonobyl

Onion rings cut in half.

Gratliff

Run to set up the pass? THAT WILL NEVER WORK

bourb0nblues

Don’t tell me what I can’t do!

http://i.imgur.com/Aa9bB8q.gif

King Hippo

There are few things more disorienting than getting drunk for the 1:00 game, passing out, then waking up sorta sober for the nightcap.

Brick Meathook

YOU ARE GOING FOR THE GUSTO

Rikki-Tikki-Deadly

A few things that are more disorienting:

Drinking a cocktail made by Darren Sharper.
Being Wes Welker.

Sharkbait

NFL Sundays: A marathon, not a sprint.

Gratliff

I’ve never been drunk before. Being an Eagles fan makes me regret it 16 weeks a year.

entropy

Are you drunk now?

Rikki-Tikki-Deadly

Okay, that mouthpiece is goddamned awesome. How much do you think the NFL is going to fine him for wearing it?

Spur

T-Will is not Dez.

entropy

OK, people…. baby sister visit was due, largely to asking me to look into New Boyfriend. Baby Sister is 11 years younger than me, new BF is 3 years OLDER than me. Would YOU be OK with that?

Opinions are needed and welcome.

Rikki-Tikki-Deadly

Is your sister in her thirties? Then she should be able to make her own call.

In her twenties? Unless there are any obvious warning signs, no reason to intervene.

Younger than twenty? You can relax; I’ve actually heard that Mark Sanchez is a really good guy.

entropy

She is 29. He was at our older brother’s wedding, when she was 8. I find that creepy in the extreme.

But, he’s not TERRIBLE, and considering I have been in worse positions, I’m tempted to let this play out. I just want opinions.

King Hippo

The knowing her when she was a child part is a codicil to my usual “who cares” attitude. I also find that creepy.

Sill Bimmons

That’s kind of a creepy backstory.

entropy

Thank FUCK I am not alone there! Our older brother is not as bothered as I am, but we are very different people. Me? I don’t like this shit.

Rikki-Tikki-Deadly

Yeah, but she’s 29 now. It’s not like he waited until the day she turned 18 and pounced.

entropy

If that had happened, I doubt I’d even be free right now.

Gratliff

Younger sisters exist to make you frustrated at how stupid younger sisters can be when it comes to men. I

entropy

The big problem is that Baby Sister is an awesome, awesome person. Both of my sisters exist to remind me I am lucky for the family I have, and that our mother was an amazing woman who raised amazing children, but damn if they don’t fail to understand their own worth and that men are horrific creatures.

blordinaryfagicmox

As long as you can put him in a headlock to establish dominance, I’m okay with it.

entropy

To be honest, I’m a big bastard and there aren’t a lot of people I *can’t* put in a headlock.

King Hippo

My younger sister is married to a dude like 16 years older than her (10 older than me). Didn’t bother me at all, but I’m weird.

Doktor Zymm

I don’t know how old you are, or how old your sister is. However, what you’re saying is a 14 year age difference. And….that’s large. Unless you’re in retirement territory, that’s large. I just tried to picture myself with someone 14 years older and 14 years younger and I wasn’t happy with either. At the same time….if they’re happy, I wouldn’t judge. I know everyone else isn’t me. But yeah, awkward for you no matter what.

entropy

That’s sort of the problem… last time I didn’t judge who a sister was with, that asshole hit my other sister and she promptly told the police if anything happened to him, *I* did it to him. That put me in a bad position.

I want them both happy, but with decent, upstanding sorts who never, ever have to deal with me. I’m drunk and more honest than I should be right now.

Back to dumb shit.

entropy

hehehe I am still REALLY drunk. Come back to Marlboro Country.

Sill Bimmons

Remember that?

When Brady’s knee got shredded in the first game?

Good times.

Spur
King Hippo

Pepperidge Farm remembers.

Sill Bimmons

Parmesan.

King Hippo

Why is CasselVANIA picture tugging his collar? Does he suck because his jersey no fit?

http://static.seattletimes.com/wp-content/uploads/2015/02/425dd846-b19f-11e4-94ea-f838621778c7-300×418.jpg

Chipthulu the Cruel: More suffering of Eagles fans to placate me! Have Sanchez act as the punter.

Sharkbait

He’s like Pizza The Hutt personified.

Bugg

Al Michaels, NASCAR fan. Winner is….(production guys….)

Rikki-Tikki-Deadly

Hmm, NBC, maybe running a promo for something called “50 Shades of Blue” isn’t a good idea on a night you’ll be discussing the Greg Hardy story, no?

Romonobyl

I would let Lily break 4 federal and 7 local ordinances with me. I live on the edge.

Sill Bimmons

My tolerance for her lawbreaking would be unlimited.

entropy

I would violate the Geneva Convention and several acts of the Federation for 10 minutes with her willing body. Do your worst.

Sill Bimmons

That looks TERRIBLE

Rikki-Tikki-Deadly

I hate Chris Hemsworth. I’ll be rooting for the whale.

King Hippo

I dunno who that is, but still GO WHALE

Rikki-Tikki-Deadly

Blondie McJawMuscles, the main character.

Romonobyl

Go fishy mammal.

John Difool

DICKY MOE FTW

Doktor Zymm

I have ice cubes. I have gin. I have a modicum of sense which says I should probably stop drinking. FUCK THE COWBOYS.

entropy

WOOOOOOO WELCOME TO MY REALITY!!!

Doktor Zymm

If you were currently in the room with me, I would propose that we spin around as fast as possible until we fell down. It would be fun.

entropy

Not really. I have the feeling I’m a MUCH bigger person than you, and physics demands one of us spin faster than the other.

Romonobyl

I really like you Zymm, but I hope you’re wrong on an epic level.

Doktor Zymm

I appreciate your fandom. I don’t dislike you. But. FUCK THE COWBOYS.

entropy

SEE?! This is why I love it at this random virtual bar…. we can disagree all day but no one pulls knives or calls the police.

Sill Bimmons

When The Wiz first came out my Nana took my sister and I to see it.

She walked us out in 15 minutes.

To this day that remains the only movie I’ve ever walked out of.

John Difool

Holy shit, you mean you’re older than me?

Sill Bimmons

Ask me about the Dust Bowl.

King Hippo

Did you start that before or after you stole the yellow bar??

entropy

Holy shit. Impromptu visit from Baby Sister followed by unplanned 45 minute nap on couch results in 7 pt Dallas lead?! What the fuck?

Doktor Zymm

Welcome to SNF. FUCK THE COWBOYS.

entropy

I hate both of these teams. On the plus side, I am drunk as fuck with a power nap in me. LET’S GO YOUTUBE!!

John Difool

Hey you know who just might be interested in liveblogging The Wiz? R. Kelly, that’s who.
Thanks, I’ll be here all week.

Romonobyl

A throwback, but still funny.

Spur

What Eagle was on the medical cart?

JustStopDude

Riley Cooper.

Black guy did it…

Doktor Zymm

So…I heard that the Cowboys aren’t that great without Tony Romo? Comments?

Sharkbait

Water is wet?

Brick Meathook

THEY’RE SAVING HIM FOR THE PLAYOFFS

Romonobyl

It’s like ham without the meat.

JustStopDude

Jesus Christ can we just get this game moving?!?

King Hippo

serious, same goddamn rule every week

Sill Bimmons

South Park marathon on Comedy Central.

blordinaryfagicmox

Reggie Bush is doing his part to move the Rams back to his (hometown) LA

Mother Puncher

Hopefully, Reggie will soon be the owner of the Rams.

Romonobyl

Sorry I’m late, life called. I made a killer batch of Spanish Chicken and the wife broke out a bottle of her reserve Merlot (still haven’t found her hiding place). Good food, good wine, I hope a good game. I can’t complain.

Sill Bimmons

I tend to let life go straight to voicemail.

Rikki-Tikki-Deadly

Slot Corner sounds like a place Martha Ford would go whenever she visits Las Vegas.

JustStopDude

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Moonbatting Average

Where did you find naughty pics of Rivers’ wife?

ThursdaySkyGoddess

Phillip Rivers’ wife had twins?

Moonbatting Average

Great minds

Doktor Zymm
Romonobyl

Am I a Dallas fan? Yes. Greg Hardy…ah, no thank you.

Gratliff

AIM FOR THEIR SEAN LEE! THAT’S THEIR WEAK SPOT!

Spur

We’re live blogging the Wiz yes?

bourb0nblues

There will be no survivors.

Redshirt

I’m proud to say I have never seen any rendition of “The Wiz”.

King Hippo

Congrats! You’re not on the Trestman list.

John Difool

Cheese Wiz?

Sill Bimmons

That’s the good shit.

Sharkbait

All I know is it won’t take shit from Greg Hardy

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JustStopDude

Russel Wilson is so white, he could play on the Patriots and the fan base would cheer for him…

Doktor Zymm

Man butt say what?
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ThursdaySkyGoddess

Peekaboo!

King Hippo

Methinks Dok is in a crack mood. You gents know what to do.

Sill Bimmons

Oh just mother fuck this fucking ad.

Moonbatting Average

Which one?

Sill Bimmons

#TwoDouchebagsSellingBose

Romonobyl

Relax, I’m back. Let me guess, nobody else here is rooting for Ameri…I mean, the Dallas Cowboys?

blackroseMD1

I’m rooting for Dez to score a billion fantasy points.

John Difool

I’m rooting for Dallas, I’m rooting for Cowboys…. just not combined.

Gratliff

This game is going to end 7-0

King Hippo

For fantasy purposes, WOO!

Chip: Have Eagles fans misery been enough to fuel my ascension into greater daemonhood?
Eagles Peon: Yes my lord.
Chip: Great gods of chaos, I transform into something greater, behold I am Chiptulu
http://static.seattletimes.com/wp-content/uploads/2015/02/425dd846-b19f-11e4-94ea-f838621778c7-300×418.jpg

Sill Bimmons

GAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH

theeWeeBabySeamus

For the love of God…why???

Sharkbait

That’s a George Lucas-esque neck pouch.

Romonobyl

I’ve never felt so healthy.

The Maestro

His cholesterol count is into the quintuple digits by now.

Brick Meathook

Why is my comment awaiting moderation? I’m Brick Meathook, dammit, of the Maryland Metahooks!!!

WCS

Are those the self-referential Hooks?

Brick Meathook

“Metahook” was our former name before my great-grandfather was hanged for horse thievery.

Redshirt

I’m not sure if your joking or serious.

Brick Meathook

OR AM I????

King Hippo

approved! sorry, I am slow on the uptake when double vicuprofen high. Stupid Broncos, losing 1 game in 2 months, totes unacceptable smgdh

Redshirt

I hope they come back from commercial with a bunch of fights on the field and cops in riot gear.

Spur

Someone check Carr for PEDs.

Doktor Zymm
Redshirt

I’m straight (my Internet search history confirms that).

Still, DAMN!

Doktor Zymm

I’m not really sure what my internet search history says about me. I’m not ashamed of it though!

Sill Bimmons

Post it or GTFO

Sill Bimmons

Knock knock!

Who’s there?

Zach Ertz!

Zach Ertz who?

I shaved with a blade for the first time, so my Zach Ertz!

John Difool

And you can have it all, my empire of Ertz….