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Cin @ Ari: Despite what your brain might tell you, you’re looking at two of the best QB’s in the league right here. Cincy is the dog in this one spread-wise. Since the start of the 2013 season they are 11-2-1 when occupying that status. Go for it, right? [slams the brakes] Hold on there, tiger-Dalton is 1-5 in prime time games. WR’s John Brown, Floyd and Fitz are all fighting injuries. If you happen to be in a 20 team league (raises hand) you may want to take a look-see at one Jaron Brown and pick him the hell up (done!) As much as I liked the Hopkins/Revis matchup earlier, I think the Green/Peterson battle looks even better. By the by, get yerself ready for some tired Palmer vs. His Former Team crap, despite the fact that he’s played against them before. Your re-run narrative awaits!
Your Sunday Night Fight Open Thread
NOW DO THAT 18 MORE TIMES
The Red Zone is the place to get cute.
I thought the place to get cute was the butthole.
“Sorry honey, it must have slipped in’.
REAL TALK: it’s impossible for it to just ‘slip in’. Anyone who brags that they just ‘slipped it in there’ is lying their face off.
Or has a needle dick.
That’s what my wife said during her last period.
Remember when Mel Kiper and Todd McShay said Andre Smith was going to be better than Anthony Munoz?
Wrong And Wronger
What?! Munoz was pure muscle and athletic talent. Smith is a chocolate-flavored Stay Puft Marshmallow Man.
THIS GUY ANDY DALTON, I CALL HIM DOUCHEBAG BECAUSE HE HAS CRAPPY HAIR AND I JUST HATE GUYS WITH CRAPPY HAIR AND OH MY GOD I SNORTED TOO MUCH COKE SOMEONE CALL 9-1-1 I’M NOT JOKING GAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAHHHH THERE ARE SPIDERS ON ME! SOMEONE CUT MY COKE WITH BORAX! AGAIN!
You should really just assume that the coke is cut with Borax at this point.
wtf
Terrible punt by Carson there….
Field goals for the field goal gods!
You just kinda know there’s gonna be a Palmer mysterious arm injury announcement tomorrow.
Yup.
WHERE WAS THAT LAST MONDAY, YOU DOUCHBAGS!?
I mean…
GOOD PLAY, GREEN!
THROW IT EIFERT YOU CHEESEFUCKS
I blame this all on Peter King.
WHO THE FUCK THOUGHT LETTING THAT PIECE OF SHIT HANG AROUND WAS A GOOD IDEA?
Palmer is channeling his inner fetus-head.
Not fair, PeyPey can’t throw that far.
That counts as a punt!
HAI, Oakland Carson Palmer!!
Why punt when you can throw a 45-yard INT?
It’s like a pre-emptive punt.
Nice punt, Carson.
The fuck was that?
Thank you Carson!
This game will have no TDs under 45 yards.
Calling it 16-13
Why do they advertise Google apps when every goddamn Android phone comes with it pre-installed?
Exactly. No one is going to buy it. Is it to make people aware the Android Siri exists?
This is going to be a puntfest, isn’t it?
These teams are pretty good at stopping the obvious up the middle run play
Is this some kind of ode to Caldwell with all the obvious playcalls?
At night I drink myself to sleep
And pretend I don’t care
that you’re not here with me
True fact:
The first few times I heard his name, I thought his name was Huge Action, and they called him that because he favored play-action passes where an oversized FB got the fake.
The Whiz, starring R. Kelly.
Good see ARI is still giving up 10 yards to the halfback outlet pass that Brees pulled off like 15 times in Week 1.
Knowin when a body says hello they won’t talk to anybody they don’t know
Recovery! Whiskey! Sexy!
The Bengals have cool helmets but their B logo is gay af.
YES! Completely Agreed! My theory is Mike Brown paid someone to make that when he was threatening to move the team to Baltimore in ’94, but decided that he didn’t want to waste the money by not using it.
The Wiz Live!: Watch and hope someone falls into a piece of scenery
Or someone offs themselves like in the original!
Maybe Allison Williams will get her salad tossed by a black guy in a Tin Man suit on live TV!
What dad carries a click-sharpie with him to his son’s peewee football game?
A: The type of asshole who writes on peoples’ cars when he doesn’t like how they park, or they have a rainbow bumper sticker.
Or Jim Harbaugh
♪ Two steps forward, One toe shot off. ♪
FRAGS FOR THE FRAG GOD!
Marvin Lewis looks like he’s see war.
UNDER ONE ROOF!
CJ2K…if he got about 1/2 of his nickname tonight, I would have a shot?
Hope the NBC camera is on Iupati when blood begins just gushing out of his ears.
Quite enjoyed hearing The Refreshments heading into that commercial break.
Did they play “Banditos?” I mute like a gunslinger.
Yup.
At least it’s more current than the 90s grunge they play when Seattle’s on.
Who goes to a car dealership on Black Friday? What car dealership needs Black Friday to make money?
Car dealers capitalize on people being chumps.
It max-Chumpness on Black Friday.
Buying a car does not count as SAVING money!
The ones owned by Josh Brent and Donte Stallworth?
You can actually get some really amazing deals because it’s basically the last weekend of the year anyone goes out to buy cars.
Dealers know that it’s their last chance to get rid of shitty inventory/take losses before EOB. It’s not about making money, its about working the books.
At halftime, Flight of the Conchords should sign the Cheer Up Murray/”Ginger Balls” song
Fuck me I just now got to my parents’ place in Baltimore. I81 was a disaster. Fucking 5 hour drive took 9.
On a positive, got to hear the Skins commentators practically call Cam the N word as Carolina blew them out of the water.
That is awesome.
So… Slurs gonna slur?
The fuck Jeremy Hill have to taunt about??
He’s rich, bitch!
haha
What the fuck, Hill?!
Is Palmer also a ginger?
Daywalker
Ginger programme-related activities.
Salute to Service Month + Cardinals = Pat Tillman.
When is Salute to the the Cover Up of Tillman’s Fratricide?
That’s taken the form of the NFL’s care for concussions.
Alright. Time to see if the Bengals offensive is going to lay another egg.
“Although no one was ever charged with the theft of the copyrighted clip art, the online fraternity was warned that further misbehavior would result in serious disciplinary action.”
Everytime I hear “University of Phoenix Stadium”
http://www.theonion.com/article/online-university-cracks-down-on-rowdy-online-frat-1214
JJ Watt could probably roll it back a notch.
YOU DON’T #GETIT HE’S A #WARRIOR IT’S ABOUT #HARDWORK #NOOFFDAYS #RISEANDGRIND HE DOES IT THE #RIGHTWAY
#LUNCHPAIL #BELTSANDER #TUNNELBORER
Whoever invented the hashtag needs to die in a chemical fire.
#DIEINAFIRE
He knows it’s #AboutPrideNotPrejudice
Fucking idiot.
I swear, Fitz has more tackles than any other WR. Dude has been having balls forced to him for a decade.
That’s what they’ll be saying about Aaron Hernandez in 9 more years.
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