Your Sunday Night “What Might Have Been” Open Thread

NE @ Den: Both of these teams need to die in a fire. That is all. Enjoy the game!

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King Hippo

Shit, he hasn’t learned you NEVER throw to Bubba Caldwell yet

Sill Bimmons

Yeah, this is gonna suck.

Doktor Zymm

IS THAT SNOW OR ASHES FROM THE FALLOUT?

Lothar of the Hill People

After 9/11, the French said, “Nous sommes tous Américains”
After the Paris attacks, we said, “We are all French”

Tonight, we are all Broncos fans.

ThursdaySkyGoddess

I stop short at the “IN-COM-PLETE” chant.

King Hippo

don’t worry, so do I

Lothar of the Hill People

C’mon, it’s like singing the Marseillese

WCS

Mildly inauspicious start.

Sill Bimmons

OSTRICH INDA HOOOOOOOOOOUUUUUUUUUUUSSSSSSSSEEEEEEEEEEEEE

JustStopDude

“How do you plan on making Brady feel uncomfortable”

“After each play, one of us will run up and pat him on the butt, I plan on picking my nose and eating the booger at the line of scrimmage, and I am sure his love life will be mentioned around the third quarter”

Lothar of the Hill People

“After every play I’m going to describe a new sexual position I like to use with my livestock”

CBQUE

How bad is the snow? Green Bay/Denver from MNF in 84?

King Hippo

It’s quite lovely on teh teevee box, at least.

Our QB played at Arizona State, so he should be totes used to it.

Horatio Cornblower

I think they’re saying up to 3″ so it looks good but won’t amount to much.

Doktor Zymm

This game might be good, or might be shit. As a fan of the team currently in the lead in the NFC East, I say. BURN IT ALL DOWN. ALL OF IT.

http://www.adn.com/sites/default/files/styles/ad_slideshow_normal/public/uaf_starvation_gulch-2.jpg?itok=dQKhex4-

John Difool

Some chicks just want to watch the world burn….

CBQUE

You’ll be in 1st until a week from tomorrow when Matt Cassell throws for 400 yards and Jerry Jones makes a proclamation that they’re headed to the top of the NFC East.

Horatio Cornblower

Matt Cassell may throw for 400 yards but 250 of those yards will be to the other team.

Gratliff

Hopefully, this is good enough that I don’t have to entertain myself with flat earth theorists on twitter. That shit is train-wreck amazing.

Doktor Zymm

Argue with them in the role of Hollow Earth Enthusiast.

Doktor Zymm

“HOW CAN THE EARTH BE FLAT WHEN IT IS FILLED WITH MOLE PEOPLE???!?!?!?!!!”

Horatio Cornblower

Oh, in today’s sign of the Apocalypse PFT Commenter was mentioned, favorably, in today’s New York Times.

WCS

i bet thos libruls just dont get the hawt taeks and our worryed bout spelling and not teling

Lothar of the Hill People

I will have to look this up. Unless you have a link?

Horatio Cornblower

It’s in the Week in Review section. They interviewed an offensive lineman and he mentioned following PFT on-line and complimented his satire.

Redshirt

I’m only say this so the Broncos will lose so…. GO PATRIOTS!!!

http://static.comicvine.com/uploads/original/14/148983/3517918-7089394321-drew-.gif

Sill Bimmons

I feel bad for current Kia owners.

People are going to think they’re all psychopaths.

Lothar of the Hill People

I finally figured it out: those KIA commercials are targeting Trump voters and Ayn Rand enthusiasts.

CBQUE

HOW THE FUCK YA DOIN BOYS!!!!

Horatio Cornblower

IT’S ALIVE!!!!

ballsofsteelandfury

Howdy stranger!

CBQUE

Been away too long needed to get back with my people on Sunday night.

Lothar of the Hill People

I expect at least personal foul to be called the Patriots’ way with the explanation: “It’s snowing, and in that commercial Gronkowski clearly called the game to be ‘touch’, and that was clearly a ‘tackle.’ Fifteen yards.”

Lothar of the Hill People

That can only be Russia.

JustStopDude

Middle East. Two guys made their own natural gas car. Or at least attempted to…

Lothar of the Hill People

The Billboard’s not in Arabic. Only place in the Middle East you see signs like that is in the UAE. They’re driving on the right side, so it’s possible.

Lothar of the Hill People

Looking closer, it looks like those are trees on the horizon. And I should say Turkey uses the Roman script, so if it’s in the Middle East, it pretty much would have to be Turkey. They drive on the right, too.

A Russian Pinata.

Sill Bimmons

You mean a Russian Pinto.

ballsofsteelandfury

Is it confirmed it’s Russia?

Horatio Cornblower

I feel like there should be more to this story…

King Hippo

Hippo could use a smile, Donks. Looking forward to a full, extended look at Mr. Osweiler. In a sense, this is a “free shot” for the kid because only a real asshole would hold it against him if he struggled against Grumblelord in his 2nd career start, playing behind a shit OL.

And although I certainly AM a real asshole, I at least am trying to work on it.

Doktor Zymm

If you start feeling bad, just remember that the Skins lead the NFC East, so this whole season is stupid anyway.

Horatio Cornblower

You know if Joan Jett hasn’t sued NBC for ripping off “I Hate Myself For Loving You” for this damn song she really ought to.

Lothar of the Hill People

I’m sure she’s making so much in royalties she only has one functional nostril.

Romonobyl

Carrie vs Faith in a scissoring match…
Who ya’ got?

bourb0nblues
ballsofsteelandfury

My pants down

Horatio Cornblower

It’s not “who” I’ve got it’s “what” and what I’ve good is a handful of lube and an entire roll of Brawny.

It’s gonna get messy in here.

Redshirt

A carpet shampooer because in five minutes, I’m gonna have a mess.

Sill Bimmons

Humanity.

Doktor Zymm

Hey, look at me, waking up just in time for the night game. Turns out I know myself and my reaction to the NFC East pretty well.

Lothar of the Hill People

Yes, but have you sobered up?

Doktor Zymm

Probably not entirely, but this game doesn’t merit additional alcohol, so close enough.

John Difool

Welcome back from the dead.

Gratliff

I’m here only to figure out what kind of hell on earth I can expect next week when the Eagles get thrown to the New England woodchipper.

Doktor Zymm

Oof. Don’t think of things in those terms. No use extending the agony.

Romonobyl

Alka Seltzer cold medicine…always got me back on my feet.

King Hippo

I did that after sports bar trip for Donks/Browns. SNF was very disorienting, to say the least.

JustStopDude

comment image

Horatio Cornblower

Great, now Asians are kicking our kids’ asses at parallel parking too.

JustStopDude
Horatio Cornblower

After a day of yard work, the gym, and letting the kids have the computer for homework I am finally ready to sit down and watch football…for 15 minutes before realizing that what the Patriots are likely to do to a Brock Osweiler-led Broncos isn’t fit for family viewing.

Von Miller, Demarco Ware, looking at you to make this interesting.

blaxabbath

It only takes one play to kill.

Bloody Lethal

Isn’t it always rough when you have to go suck it up and watch your team play?

Romonobyl

I thought Ware was out?

King Hippo

His non-union, Mexican equivalent is Shane Ray.

Gratliff

Really, there’s no point in featuring Ricky Gervais if he can’t call everyone cunts like he wants to.

ThursdaySkyGoddess

I just turned over to NBC and thought the “Sunday Night Kickoff” sign said “Suckoff.” It still seemed correct.

Redshirt

If its for playoff seeding purposes, can I root for the Patriots to win? How about if I root for the Broncos to lose? Would that be acceptable?

King Hippo

NO

Lothar of the Hill People

And the Brady-Osweiler rivalry begins!

(NBC: “Holy fuck, we have to change Carrie Underwood’s lyrics about the Manning-Brady rivalry on Sunday Night!”)

Old School Zero

I can’t wait until they cut too early to Bob Costas and catching him staring into a mirror, masturbating.

ballsofsteelandfury

Maybe this?
comment image?w=650

bourb0nblues

Good evening. And fuck Brady.

litre_cola

Aaron? Is that you?

Lothar of the Hill People

I don’t care how much you hate Denver, there’s no way you can hate them more than New England.

ballsofsteelandfury

I don’t know how anyone can hate Denver. They don’t really have assholes on their team. That I know of.

Col. Duke LaCross

Holy shit! Henry Burris is still alive?

Lothar of the Hill People

Sadly, so is John Shoop.

litre_cola

He sure is, and may win another Grey Cup too although Edmonton should pull away.

ballsofsteelandfury

Well, that sucked. We are not good enough to give away games like that.

John Difool

Richard Sherman has so many things going on with his face when he talks he reminds me of this guy…

http://media.giphy.com/media/T0xH1RUF9hkKA/giphy.gif

WCS

He is one ugly motherfucker.

R.J. Macready or Jack Burton

John Difool

R.J., because he’s a real light sleeper, Chiles….

John Difool

R.J., Jack Burton or Snake Plissken?

Sill Bimmons

Pretty sure I’m not going to make it very far into this one.

Gratliff

Oh my god. THe brady cocksucking is off to a tremendous start.

ballsofsteelandfury

Are they cradling the balls?

Redshirt

Hey! LEGO Batman is on!

Sill Bimmons

hey guys

Sill Bimmons

Maybe he’s religious. Maybe he’s gay.

Yes.

Redshirt

So once again, he’s cut because he didn’t score.

Moose -The End Is Well Nigh

When I was googlebinging I was hoping for something different.

http://41.media.tumblr.com/tumblr_lbfq9qQvjE1qch9gxo1_1280.jpg

Romonobyl

That has the 80’s written all over it.

Sharkbait

“I really should play”
“Peyton, it’s cold outside”
“I won’t throw it away”
“Peyton, it’s cold outside”

Sill Bimmons

boo

Old School Zero

BroncOsweiler

Redshirt

Alright, after watching the Season Finale of My Little Pony: Friendship is Magic, I have come to a revelation:

Someone here is traveling back in time trying to prevent the formation of the Patriots Dynasty. While we all appreciate your efforts, and your heart is in the right place, it isn’t working. If anything, the Patriots are only getting better. So stop trying to change history; you’ll only making it worse.

Gratliff

That episode really lacked in ecstasy and sexual assault.

litre_cola

Fallout Boy is the halftime show at the Grey Cup. SMH, we are a sad country.

Sharkbait

Could’ve been Nickleback

litre_cola

We wouldn’t do this to ourselves. We aren’t masochists.

Dunstan

Look, Canada has apologized repeatedly for Nickleback.

Romonobyl

They stall haven’t taken Justin Beiber back yet though.

litre_cola

You can keep that fucking guy.

Lothar of the Hill People

SHOULD’ve been Nickelback.

But they were playing in Atlanta’s secondary, instead.

Gratliff

Time to come up with all the ways Tom Brady is just like James Deen.

Old School Zero

I’ve tried to use my safeword against the patriots time and time again, but they never stop.

Moose -The End Is Well Nigh

He can borrow my car.

Redshirt

He really needs to be cellmates with Jared from Subway.

King Hippo

They should have kept the ad campaign the same and just photshopped in Osweiler. BRADY/OSWEILER I!!!!!

Moose -The End Is Well Nigh
Gratliff

The only hope the Eagles have next week is a horrific injury tonight.

GO TEAM HORRIFIC INJURY!

litre_cola

I can get behind this.

Gratliff

The knee injury so bad, it gave a man brain damage.

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