The scene: Downtown, in a traffic jam. Brocky is sitting impatiently in his car, listening to the 2016 NFL Draft Day 2 pre-show.

Brocky (honking his horn): Come on…come on…

Radio Announcer: And we’re only minutes away from the first pick of day 2!

Brocky: Aw, man! I missed the big shindig yesterday…there’s no way I’m gonna miss out today!

Getting out of his car, Brocky climbs up onto the hood and looks at over a mile of snarled traffic.

Brocky: Crap! OK, OK…there’s only one thing to do…

Brocky jumps from his car hood onto the roof of the next car over, then climbs up on an SUV and leaps off of that onto a sedan.

SUV Driver: Hey!

Sedan Driver: Asshole! Get offa my car!

Brocky (apologetically): Sorry…sorry, everyone…

Brocky continues his trek from car to car, slowly making his way through the stationary traffic.

Brocky: There’s still no way I’m getting there in time. Unless…

Brocky spots a traffic helicopter making it’s way over the jam. He jumps from a Kia to a fire truck, almost loses his grip, but then climbs up the side.

Brocky: Gotta time this just right…

As the traffic helicopter flies near, Brocky climbs onto the fire truck ladder and hits the release. He is vaulted upwards on the ladder, holding on for dear life. As the ladder extends all the way, he climbs to the very top, then grabs the landing skid of the helicopter as it buzzes overhead. Holding on tightly, he swings free of the ladder and flies over the traffic.

Brocky: Woooooo!

The helicopter continues on over the traffic, then continues out over the highway, Brocky swinging to and fro as it banks and turns.

Brocky: If I wasn’t scared out of my mind, this would be awesome!

As the helicopter starts to bank toward the north, Brocky sees an open-bed mattress delivery truck driving below.

Brocky: Welp, here’s where I get off.

Brocky lets go of the skid and goes into a free-fall as the helicopter passes over the truck.

Brocky (as he falls): Phraaaaaaassssssiiiiingggg!

Brocky lands smack-dab in the center of the yuuuge pile of mattresses, amazingly unharmed.

Brocky: I can’t believe that actually worked!

The truck travels down the road for a mile. Brocky climbs off the mattress pile and onto the roof of the truck. As it drives under a traffic light pole, he jumps up and grabs the arm, swings around it twice, then lets go and does a fly away dismount into a perfect landing.

Brocky: Wow! I can’t believe all those years of gymnastics finally came in handy! Who’s laughing now, entire third-grade class of William Henry Harrison Elementary?

Seeing a kid on a skateboard, Brocky rushes over.

Brocky: Hey, kid! I’ll give you twenty bucks for that skateboard!

Kid: What? This is a Pilsner longboard, man. It set me back one-fifty.

Brocky: For a skateboard? OK, look…

Brocky pulls all the cash out of his wallet.

Brocky (counting): There’s…one-hundred and sixty-eight dollars here. Deal?

Kid (handing over the board): Righteous bucks, dude.

Brocky skateboards down the street, turning smoothly into a downhill run. He takes a shortcut through a park, then skates the handrails down a long flight of steps. He lands perfectly and grabs the bumper of a Volkswagen leaving the parking lot. Keeping crouched down, he skitches another mile or so before releasing and skating down another road.

Brocky (checking his watch): Finally! I can’t believe I’m going to make it!

A sweaty and exhausted Brocky skids to a stop in front of the DFO clubhouse, and rushes in.

[DOOR FLIES OPEN]

Brocky: Hey, guys! I…made…it…?

The clubhouse is deserted. It looks like there was a yuuuuge party going on. There are beer cans everywhere, chip bags litter the floor and there’s a large, half-eaten three-tier cake on the table.

Brocky: Guys…?

Brocky looks around. He kicks an empty beer can and it clatters across the floor.

Brocky (sadly): I guess they must have left already.

Brocky looks around the empty clubhouse again, then goes out the door with a sigh.

All is silent for several moments, then the door to Zymm’s lab opens and everyone comes piling out.

Beerguyrob: See? I told you guys we could all fit in Zymm’s lab! Even with Big Red here.

Cookiethulhu (squeezing out the door): I say, old man, I do hope that’s not a joke about my weight! We elder gods are sensitive about such things!

Ballsofsteelandfury: Just don’t let her know we were all in there. She gets kinda touchy about that.

JJ Fozz: Not a chance! What, you think we’re a bunch of dumbasses?

WCS: Hey, I want more cake! How about you guys?

Lord Revisisle: I’ll take a piece…hey, the Draft is about to start!

Sill Bimmons (racing to the couch ahead of Rikki-Tikki-Deadly): Thou art too slow, old friend!

Rikki-Tikki-Deadly: Aww…OK, I’ll sit on the floor again.

Low Commander of the Super Soldiers: Hey, this is really exciting!

DTZM: I’m glad you guys could all make it. This is our best Draft Day ever!

To be continued…