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*this is a Ray Bradbury approved post
Your “It’s 451 Degrees Fahrenheit* Up In Here!” Saturday Afternoon/Evening Open Thread
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Time to write.
I’m drunj, full of McDonald’s and pizza and already broke at least one piece of glassware.
I’ve never heard any of her songs, but I must admit that Katy Perry is a very attractive woman.
I know that she was once married to Russell Brand, which means that she has poor taste in men. This gives me hope.
Katy, if your reading this, please call me!
She’s also weirdly Christian. Like the kind who would be a technical virgin because she took it in the ass and blowbanged a dozen guys but never had vag sex before marriage.
You have probably heard “I Kissed a Girl”; they played the holy shit out of that song.
http://cdn.rsvlts.com/wp-content/uploads/2015/02/Katy-Perry-Greatest-GIF-010-compressor.gif
They may have overchummed the water a little
Good evening, folks.
Tonight’s after beer-selling beverage is Driftwood Brewing (Victoria, BC) White Bark Witbier. I’m pairing it with some glazed chicken and a tomato salad.
I’ll be asleep in an hour, happy as a god damned clam.
Now yer talkin’ my language.
You don’t like cheese? Everybody likes cheese.
All right, the animals are telling me I should go to bed (or at least go watch TV or something). G’night all.
I would be entirely remiss to not include this.
Shake that ass!
I have a song…
To our own Doktor Zymm, if you are still awake or are rereading at a later time…
I was shaking my ass proper tonight in your honor.
HEY!
HOT PANTS!
Are we still shakin’ dat ass?
R CRUMB
The Seeds
https://youtu.be/-gFSAyzx4Oc
How does one go about “trying out” here. I want to write something for this site, but don’t know if I can do it. How do I make a rough draft I may or may not even submit?
Let me know, someone, as the subject is time sensitive (I have 10 days).
Is it a Top 10 List? Top Ten DNC 2016 Convention Nipslips.
No need to”try out”. Just write something and we’ll post it. I’m sure it will be funny. If you want to send it to me, I’ll do it. I can give you my email.
Balls is being nice. Once you submit your first piece, you gotta go through hazing.
SHHHHHH!!
YOU’LL SCARE HIM!
Just sent you an email.
Once you go big time Fronkenshteen don’t forget about us.
You’re going to dice a whole SHITLOAD of vegetables!
Seriously though, write and submit.
Just write!
It’s very cathartic.
I’m proof they’ll take anyone!
Now that’s not!
That’s not entirely untrue.
I love ya Beer Guy!
I had a couple of hot cousins.
Nothing ever happened.
I was the youngest just beggin’ for scraps.
Scraps was all I got.
They could shake that ASS!
Just finished up watching Strange Things on Netflix. I highly recommend it.
Good to know.
Evening.
Welcome!
I posted a joke on Gawker that got over 350 recs today. It’s actually just a sketch idea. Now I think I can be a comedy writer again. I’m here to remind myself how below average my ideas are.
Drinking is easy.
Comedy is hard!
I am making those egg rolls. We JUST got a fry daddy. Just gotta find sake. (I live in the sticks)
Thanks again for the wisdom. Hello to your brothers. And I hope the Cubs win it all this year so your granddaughter will be seen as some sort of mystic holyperson.
I’m fuggin’ drunk.
Sorry for spray painting my idiocy all over the open thread.
Your input is always welcome and my poor Cubs influenced granddaughter will be here to bear witness long after I’m gone.
Do try the egg rolls!
They’re fucking delicious!
Keep that oil hot!
The recipe calls for rice wine. I chose sake because I can drink it afterwards.
Any rice wine.
If using rice wine vinegar dilute with some water.
I’m here to help!
Alright, the ladyfriend just baked some chocolate cookies, so it’s time for those, scotch, Mozart in the Jungle, and then off to bed. Fare thee well.
Another DJ Taj selection.
Why doesn’t that lazy bum get his own commentist account?
I want full immersion in her ass.
Sonofabitch.
I was joking about the whole masturbation thing.
….’til now.
THIS IS THE DISCIPLINE THAT MAKES AMERICA GREAT
I forgot to mention – my wife just left this morning for a business trip to Germany. It’s funny but the biggest difference when she’s gone is that I tend to stay up later. Which seems to be the case tonight; it’s 9 p.m. here and I’ve only had two drinks (the two I had in the afternoon don’t count) and I haven’t even had dinner yet.
Wooooo!!!!
Bachelor days.
This should end well
Sorry I missed you Rikki.
I had a couple of free hours and I decided to do some extra gym time.
I should check my phone more often.
The good news is…
No worries, it was very much spur of the moment. Funny thing is I pulled off of Sepulveda to call and realized I was like two blocks away from your place.
I truly am next door to the goddamn airport.
Next time.
I know this Cuban place that’s incredible.
You took Sepulveda? You gotta avoid that and the 405. Next time, only pull off to hit the Coffee Bean or In N Out.
http://img.spokeo.com/public/900-600/bill_hader_2012_05_18.jpg
Look at this fuckin’ guy!
Damn right on all accounts.
Us Westsiders know the backroads and use them to our advantage.
You’re a tourist or a meth-addled local if you end up on the 405 on a Saturday afternoon.
That In N Out leads straight down Westchester Parkway which takes you away from traffic.
WHICH IS GOOD!
I LIVE RIGHT BY YOU ALL! YOU WILL NEVER MEET ME UNLESS IT IS A SUPER-SPECIAL OCCASION! THAT’S BECAUSE YOU NEVER INVITE ME TO ANYTHING! TWO CAN PLAY AT THAT GAME, BOYS!
So not true! You know you are invited to every SoCal get-together!
Exactly what Balls said.
Stop by. We’ll have drinks and Thai massage!
We’re going dutch though on the massage.
Brick Meathook (plus the unrelated but perfect associated picture) is one of my favorite kommentist profile names.
“Low Commander of the Super Soldiers” has always been tied as my favorite, along with “Lord Don Looey,” and that goes back to the old site.
My name is from a poorly distributed comic that I drew when I was in high school.
* Lord Joe Don Loony*
I was going south on Sepulveda so’s I could get on the 105. Trust me, I know not to fuck with the 405.
This guy Rikki?
I call him a local because he doesn’t fuck with the 405!
Beethoven, Aviation, Jefferson (to a degree), but most of all VENICE BLVD.
Thank you for your kind applause, folks….
That’s some strait up local shit yo!
I’m more of a Pershing, Vista Del Mar, Lincoln kind of guy but I like the cut of your gib!
La Cienega on the right days.
You and I may have an automobile collision one day.
I’ve always had the hots for Cassandra Peterson, and she played a lot more roles than Elvira. Beautiful, funny, sexy, and smart: what’s not to love. Cassandra, if you’re reading this, please call me.
I have to go feel sorry for myself now.
Have a good night folks.
Good luck with your butt issues, Dok.
I had a bunch of sweetwater IPA at the concert and a) wish I had more in my fridge and b) am missing ATL a little now.
Man what a solid beer. I go down to St. Simons in Georgia every year and I was super pleased to discover it recently. Now the only problem is moar.
They finally started distributing up in DC, so I can usually get the IPA or the 420, I just haven’t kept any in the fridge since I’ve been traveling so much for work.
Speaking of, going to Maine in a few weeks. Any recs (other than Allagash)?
I’ve got a life buddy in Maine.
I’ll throw out a life line.
Big fan
Every time I see a show at the 930 in DC, I see Bob Mould chilling at the door because he’s DJ’ing the late night session. His eyes always seem to be saying “shit, if this many people are here to see the Feelies…”
No reunion yet, tho.
Goddamned moderation.
Fuck you.
Tell that dog to bring me an extra taco. I’m hungry.
Green Day – X-Kid
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=GdLYCjTACpQ
DJ Taj recommended this and after watching the video I concur.
Taj just likes to torture folks, eh?
I’m out. Party time.
Ditto. And totally NOT to masturbate.
I can’t wait to leave work…
Hola, amigos. The ladyfriend and I just got back from an unbelievable Samantha Fish concert. My earbuds are tickled pink, or whatever appropriately conveys how awesome the show was.
Did you have an erection?
/my question might be unrelated to your statement
Wie gehts BFC!
Was ist los!
I don’t know why I’m speaking German!
Sounds like everyone around here ordered “the usual.”
Time to pour myself a scotch
Actually I ordered the UNusual earlier.
It was glorious.
Or embedded.
Eisbrecher: Miststueck 2012
It’s in German, but the video needs no translation.
Okay. Guten nacht verdamten archholes!
Gute nacht Frau Doktor.
Ach du himmel! The language on this board!
This makes me happy. Hooray tidy bowl man!
http://media0.giphy.com/media/ztWHpHzojfzDa/giphy.gif
Now get out there and shakes your asses proper!
Fuck
It looks like they’re about to do exactly that
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