Did your team acquit itself well? How about that play in that Lions game? How embarrassing. I feel sorry for the fans of *fill in the blank*. Maybe next week. Likely not. But that catch? Wow! The best I’ve seen in quite some time. And the Bears? Tell me about it. But enough of this, what about…TO THE GAME!
Indy/Hou-These are two teams with something to prove. As far as the Texans O is concerned they must prove 2 + 2=4. Tough one. Don’t start laughing Colts D-you’ve got String Theory, and no, it can’t involve kittens! Wr Hilton loves the Texans-thanks to a 223 yard game back in ’14 he’s racked up 750+ and 6 TD’s in 8 games against these guys. The other talented wideout in this game-Hopkins-has struggled with new qb Osweiler. Communication breakdowns and forced throws to Houston’s best wr have resulted in 4 of Brock’s 7 intercepts. But opposing qb’s tend to get well against the “Bend And Then Break” D of Indianapolis. [looks into crystal ball] I see tons of dropped passes, mental errors, missed tackles, overthrown throws and maybe something a little bit extra special. Perhaps we’ll be treated to a “running out of the back of the end zone” or a “coach freezes out his own kicker” or maybe even a “team-mates fight on the sideline” thingy. One can dream…
Go on…TYPE!
Brock Lobster!
welp
Watching some old Craig Ferguson and have … come to the conclusion that IMO Moon Bloodgood is an attractive woman with an interesting name.
Why the doubt on this?
http://images2.fanpop.com/image/photos/10100000/Moon-moon-bloodgood-10184560-498-300.jpg
No, whatever you do make no effort to get out of bounds.
WE’RE 7 POINTS AWAY FROM OVERTIME!
Crap…we’re 7 points away from overtime…
Did this incredibly boring game just get…interesting?
Fools gold
A lot more interesting.
That laughable effort by the Colts defense changed my fantasy situation from “sitting on a comfy lead” to “iffy”.
Got a backed up drain or a pesky insurgent issue?
http://www.snopes.com/wordpress/wp-content/uploads/2015/12/truck-1.jpg
I’m a fan of Larsen’s Biscuits.
http://forums.pelicanparts.com/uploads13/Top+Gear+Larsens1212618952.jpg
http://67.media.tumblr.com/ee94a14e887b5ce99dc86baf4e304389/tumblr_mx3brufe9i1s3yt9zo1_1280.png
I can’t help but notice that American Pie Story failed to show up for her team’s spotlight dance. ALSO lowering DFO’s Glorious Bechtel rating. I must send her a sternly-worded, not-at-all-creepy PDJ, post-haste.
I’m pretty sure we fail the Bechtel Test because we talk about football and the men who play it.
http://67.media.tumblr.com/775234a28008b1b01b673cc3e495b99c/tumblr_oen5dfxE4e1re0c97o1_500.gif
Looks like I’m gonna beat the previously undefeated Zymm.
And in the Battle of the Blondes, the formerly lossless Covalent is falling to I Will Dye.
Around here, it’s all:
http://www.venturebrosblog.com/wp-content/uploads/2013/07/venture-bros-osi-love-you-image-01.jpg
http://www.memeando.com/wp-content/uploads/2013/07/estupido_y_sensual_harry.gif
I have todayed enough. Indi-bibimbap-abis seems to have this, which is fine. I’d hate them to lose to an imaginary construct. Tomorrow I’ll put in an extra asscheek writing a half-ass report from the field. Night you fine individuals.
http://www.beheadingboredom.com/wp-content/uploads/2016/10/robot-take-this-human.gif
Skynet self aware….with balls?
You’ve got all three timeouts with 5:00 left in the game, “Texans” fans.
When exactly would you like the team to use them?
That’s like having an extra bottle of Centrum Silver to help fight your stage 4 lung cancer.
That’s like having an extra bottle of Centrum Silver to help fight your stage 4 lung cancer.
Goddammit, why is it doing this again?
Because you touch yourself at night.
Is there anyone on the planet who thinks Osweiler has TWO TD drives in him in 5+ minutes?
Or can I go ahead and start watching porn already FFS??????
Wait, you don’t always have that on in the background?
Aren’t Texans games technically considered torture porn?
FSS porn: Female Female Scissoring?
ffs smh
It’s late. We knew what you meant sport. Keep your head up and get back out there.
mff ffs mtf a2m bbw dp
Seriously: Have the Texans ever won a nighttime game?
/nails 3 x 8 = 24
//treats self to a shot
///remembers beer to liquor, never sicker
////decides fuck dat shit, takes shot anyway
You dont KNOW me!
Don’t throw away your shot, Seamus.
/Ayo I’m just like my country, I’m young, scrappy, and hungry…
//Just let me keep rambling, I’ll snap out of it
Would anyone here over 40 even consider buying an American car?
I look back on all the death traps they tried to kill me in and I’ll be fucked before they’ll ever get a penny of my money.
I’m pretty much hooked on Japanese pickup trucks.
Sorry, that came out all wrong. What I meant to say is that I pick up Japanese hookers at truck stops.
RTD IS ISIS
http://static.businessinsider.com/image/56153d96bd86ef18008c006d/image.jpg
yeah, I’m still against back to the days they tried to get by with selling cheap shit based on MURRIKA!! Globalized marketplace now, deal with it.
/only shitty thing about my Japanese minivan is the fucking American “run flat” tires I have to buy because I was to dumb to replace the axles 100K miles ago
http://images.autotrader.com/scaler/620/420/cms/images/cars/audi/a6/2012/2012-audi-a6/167896.jpg
I got a Subaru Legacy a few years ago and I fucking love it.
/hugs his Challenger R/T
Yeah, but that’s not a “car car.”
Muscle cars are supposed to try to kill you.
First car I had was a 69 Bradley GT. Then I found out the body was made of an awful fiberglass that basically dissolved on impact. Also, by the time I had restored it and turned 16, I was too tall to sit in it without removing the gull wings.
Pretty sure Verne Troyer would have trouble fitting into a Bradley.
http://cdn.revivaler.com/wp-content/uploads/2015/10/Bradley-GT-barrett-jackson.com_.jpg
Yeah, but it looked cool as shit to 14 year old me. 16 year old, 6’3” me on the other hand…
It looks pretty damn cool to 5’9″ me.
It still looked cool to me too, but a doorless, windowless car in Hammond, IN was not really practical. Also no heat because it was a rear engine Superbeetle engine.
We had an MGA when I was a kid. Driving it, you could watch the road go by beneath you, since the wooden floorboards had burned away due to heat from the exhaust.
That was every car in the 70s.
And guess how much of that “American” car/truck was built in Canada/Mexico/Japan?
Not talking about who builds it, talking about who signs their checks.
And they’re all in Grosse Pointe.
True. My Challenger had parts assembled in Mexico.
But it’s OK! NAFTA! TTP! HRC! DOA! FML!
Fuck you chevy, no one outside of a car commercial or bmw jerk off circle will ever describe a car’s “lines”.
Doctor cut hurty out of Ben leg harf harf harf.
The Ben get TWO Choco Tacos after??
They told him he could have a Choco Taco if he was a big boy and didn’t cry.
AND get to ride in Boss Todd’s bitchin’ Camaro WITH the T-tops off.
She’s out in the sunlight!
Immersion ruined.
http://66.media.tumblr.com/3bfcae2343581c4af122f703195c8917/tumblr_mw0oxbPGXU1sw2gn5o4_1280.jpg
She’s one of those CW network vampires that is impervious to pretty much everything.
I suppose that quarterbacking is actually pretty complicated, and even runningbacks need to learn protection schemes, but is there any hidden complexity to nose tackle? Just get in the way of the offensive linemen, and go where they don’t want you to go?
Stunts and vacancy coverages:
http://assets.sbnation.com/assets/2102729/UnderStunts2.png
Aaron Rodgers is big fan of the Pirate Q
Well there goes another career possibility.
Plus there’s the Albert
&w=1484&op=resize&opt=1&filter=antialias
http://i.kinja-img.com/gawker-media/image/upload/t_original/jh52thohoalrmdo3hhlr.gif
http://1.bp.blogspot.com/-jo2QjyF1WpM/UfWsEZpse8I/AAAAAAAAlQQ/NfgAVR64IRA/s1600/Venture+Bros+8.jpg
Glasses: why do they suck so hard?
spend MOAR money on them!!!
/am basically blind without mines, so I don’t go cheap. Makes a lot of difference.
Also: Fuck Pete Rose. He’s all of Donald Trump’s dishonestly and snake oil salesman bullshit in a tiny troll body.
Today I watched the second half of that dud of a Raiders game in my local dive bar. There were literally three people there including me, and one of them was the bartender.
That sounds like a GREAT place. A for reals dive, not a hipster-colonized “dive”
Our kinda place indeed.
Fuck people.
Oh yeah, it’s a for real dive. Until they opened up their own kitchen they used to leave 20-packs of Del Taco tacos near the door so the alcoholics would eat SOMETHING during the day.
I like it (and we had a good time there during the DFO crawl) but that was too desolate even for me.
it’s also nice to feel comparatively good about one’s alcoholism level ,, ppl forget that
The only non-craft centered bar that I like going to is a hidden dive bar on the river. It’s been there long enough that it’s immune from code restrictions. It’s an absolute shithole and it’s full of serious rednecks, but it’s the most perfect spot. People literally fish while they’re at the bar.
I think I have to go Last Week Tonight instead of the rest of this game
I’m only still watching because the alternative is making it Monday faster. My brain can’t process anything smrter than this shit right now. MIGRAINES WOO!!!
Well fuck me.
http://66.media.tumblr.com/60f6e523e7cbc1000b16d515f826f0ae/tumblr_obbxc0q1sW1umk4ogo1_400.gif
Everything’s better with Dick.
Dirt RAMIT wins 1-0.
HUZZAH FOAR the new Mister October, Clayton Kershaw!!
http://66.media.tumblr.com/tumblr_lon3ulmImc1qe4o3oo1_1280.jpg
Welp, I just at least a little trouble with 6 x 9 = 54…so at least we’re headed in the right direction now. Bourble being approached is better than no bourble whatsoever.
http://4.bp.blogspot.com/-8IgSrELw90k/UeyWXKmN-FI/AAAAAAAAQoo/PwDEn6U85cI/s1600/20290276.jpg
we need to work some imaginary numbers into the mix, what with the Texans on and everything…
and now, for the latest installment in our series chronicling the interactions of God, our lord and savior, and his ongoing effort to cause Brocky as much personal agony as possible through his fantasy manifestations:
God: So who’s brocky got in this game?
Jesus: Well, he’s starting luck in one league, he’s way down with no chance of coming back. But in another he’s got Hilton and vinitari, against the houston D. He’s only down by 4, so if Indy kicks the easy FG on fourth down here, he’ll likely win.
God: I see, make the colts go for it on fourth down even though they have a 13 point lead, and make sure luck stands there like a dumbass and gets sacked. no points for brocky
play happens
God: good. 6 point deficient now. get over that asshole!
Jesus: I knew I should have stayed with mom this weekend…
http://www.toddalcott.com/wp-content/uploads/2013/06/Snapz-Pro-XScreenSnapz007.jpg
and now I’m still losing by 1 because of the fucking sack
http://66.media.tumblr.com/fa579503242ce6c9504073432f1aad99/tumblr_obavztw87A1rhp4nco1_540.gif
Hypnotic.
The opposite:
The gif that keeps on cuming.
Andrew Luck may as well be Art Vandelay.
http://67.media.tumblr.com/74e6c1fae91ec7a0515699d127eb4527/tumblr_n75k50bzpk1suzl23o6_r1_250.gif
A barn raiser IS an architect of sorts!
I thought he was an import/export guy?
He’s both.
He can be whoever the script needs him to be!
I need to drink faster, but you people are distracting me.
(You People?)
http://67.media.tumblr.com/8cabdeb6fcc320c3d12780008204620b/tumblr_o5wdpya4nA1rhp4nco1_1280.gif
You Rack Disciprine
I don’t know what I am, but I’m sure I’ll find a way to take offense.
♫ Motown Philly’s Back Again ♫
http://www.sofakingnews.com/wp-content/uploads/2013/10/the-gang-motown-philly.jpg
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=OTqL14T7I8M
republicans on facebook: why isn’t any of the LAMESTREAM MEDIA reporting on the DOESTIC TERRORISM in North Carolina??!??
Maybe because last time something happened in North Caroina all you could say was that the confederate flag wasn’t racist?
NC should just be happy the US hasn’t dropped a nuclear bomb on them.
Again.
I thought that was South Carolina?
Goldsbor, NC:
https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/1961_Goldsboro_B-52_crash
I was thinking of this one, but it was off the coast of Georgia:
https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/1958_Tybee_Island_mid-air_collision
Reading these just makes me so happy the Cold War is once again under way!
NOBODY would miss Goldsboro. Tis a wasteland.
I mean, we would DEFINITELY dump all our fallout there ,, smh
Or their war on bathrooms.
Al Haig is on the Humps OL? Well, at least we know who’s in charge here!!
Everyone on here over 45 laughed.
Then they got depressed & drank.
http://67.media.tumblr.com/7cf813a164897d8883b09bf1d3c2fa69/tumblr_o71cx38HOM1rhp4nco1_1280.jpg
I hate Marlins Man.
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=0qK1ga44ZxI
The only good thing about staring at that rich old shit is that PFTCommenter has been trolling him all night in the row behind him.
Is PFTC at the game?
Yes. Wearing an orange shirt that says “Humbell.”
It’s fucking awesome.
It gets better according to the Tweetybox, where #MarlinsWoman is trending.
I don’t hate him; I’m just jealous. If I had that kinda moneys I’d likely be doing the same thing.
Being a massive attention whore who tries to claim he’s really humble because he sometimes gives seats to random people who have to sit with him?
No, if I were rich I’d probably go to a lot of games too, but I wouldn’t be as conspicuous as possible so ESPN actually does a package on me and pretend I’m actually modest.
They should force him to sit next to Ronnie Woowoo. And maybe next to Yellon.
A good idea because then a single grenade could solve three problems at once.
I agree with your principles, but you nor I are rich. It appears to go with the territory.
well, all his moneys won’t make Jose Fernandez alive again, will it? SO THERE!
http://image.shutterstock.com/z/stock-photo-case-closed-red-vintage-seal-isolated-on-white-177071609.jpg
So if an extra point is missed and there is no one there who cares, does Gregggg still close his notebook?
If there’s a gawd he’s burning it to keep his unemployed ass warm.
Hey ty hilton, you know how you have a TD in 3 STRAIGHT FUCKING GAMES
Think we can work on that maybe? it’d be appreciated. like seriously.
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=JJcmCME_jG8
Trashy redhead depression music.
Yay? Yay.
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=L9Wnh0V4HMM
Why yes, I had this tab open already:
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=X1lzgxYTJPk
I WILL NAWT SKINNY SHAME YOU, FIONA!!!!
/dem shoulders
LMAO…I didn’t even think of that.
Well it was like (1996?) and she was like (19) at the time. Don’t remember that being much of public/social thing back then (other than Karen Carpenter, r.i.p.).
I’m glad she was 19, at least because I sure self-abused to her a lot.
http://66.media.tumblr.com/2b0288790ec116353f1a31a3f927c977/tumblr_of4cwj23hH1ugx53no1_500.jpg
Pit maneuver?
Dats no pit, dats a bahhstan!
NO ONE DENIES THIS
Macabre question: So the new thing is cars with sensors to brake before you hit things. So what if you’re trying to crash your car? Will it stop just before the tree?
Probably couldn’t stop someone from driving off a cliff should the situation warrant.
Or what about a pit maneuver?
That would be a resounding “no” from Rob Bironas.
Short answer: “No” with an “if.”
Long answer: “Yes” with a “but.”
Figures that a team that doesn’t really exist missed an extra point on a touchdown that probably didn’t actually happen, either.
The mob has spoken: no moare redheads!
http://picture-cdn.wheretoget.it/46v9uq-l-610×610-white-met+mother-cats-animal-t+shirt-graphic+tee-alyson+hannigan-lily+aldrin-celebrity-cute-black+white-brown+hair-cozy-style-fashion-shirt.jpg
A “touch… down”? What is this you speak of, Houstonians?
http://global3.memecdn.com/touchdown_o_1110633.jpg
The Toyota Corolla: The Most Unindividual Car In History
Mr. Fords Taurus would like a word.
‘Member ford escorts?
Actually that’s what I meant to say. It was my Drivers Ed car.
*edit – it was so generic, I forgot what it was called.
woooo touchdown yaaayyyy…
No Cris, an alien invasion wouldn’t make this game interesting.
Unless it just took Cris and left everyone else. Actually, no, that wouldn’t make it interesting, just better.
Couldn’t hurt
http://www.thiel-a-vision.com/wp-content/uploads/2010/05/anna.jpg