Man, it’s already Week 9? Where did the time go? [looks at several empty bottles of scotch on the mantle] Oh, right. TO THE GAME!
Atl/TB-The Bucs D was on the field for a leg muscle-sapping 94 plays last week against a high-powered Raiders team-now they get the Falcons and their 30+ points per game O. This might not turn out well. But at least they can depend on the running game? Hah! The starting guy-no matter who he is-is a fourth stringer. I’m hoping it’s Antone Smith, the guy I picked up in my deep fantasy league when I was forced to drop Mr. Jamaal Charles. The “Glass Half Full Report” tells me that the fella has 4.3 forty speed and if qb Winston is forced to check down because the entire Falcons secondary is hanging around with wr Evans, then maybe something good might happen. The other secondary, especially cb Grimes, is hoping that wr Julio is limping and won’t take them down to the schoolyard. Look for a few longer shots from qb Ryan though. Pro Football Focus rates him as the best deep passer in the league and of his 721 yards on passes over 20 yards Julio has 39% of them. Hey Matty, as you learned last week, wr Sanu just might be open.
There it is. Oh, one other thing. Be sure to check out Free Ballin’ Football’s latest podcast here. Did Bill’s rash finally clear up? Did Nick really hit on his girlfriend’s mother at the Halloween party? Has Josh’s anti anti-deodorant protest alienated even more co-workers? Will Tim’s step-uncle finally sit him down for “the birds and the bees” talk? For the answer to these questions and some salient jibber-jabber about NFL football give ‘er a listen with the old ear holes.
LET’S DO THIS!
Some 40 year-old shut-in has masturbated to this gif
Don’t be ashamed.
I’m only 37!
I’m only 32 you asshole
http://www.msn.com/en-us/health/medical/Mans-liver-inflammation-linked-to-common-energy-drink-study/ar-AAjJo1N?OCID=ansmsnnews11
Thunder Muscle??
http://68.media.tumblr.com/39c0c8d9f2a60ca3e617dbd6626e367d/tumblr_ndrb71oERe1sp7wwuo1_400.gif
That’s good hustle!
Donald Trump
I’ve eaten more pussy than Donald Trump has
It would be pretty funny if the Buccaneers turned around and broke the Raiders’ newly set penalty record.
they certain;ly are giving it the old college try
It would be fun to start a restaurant chain based on the concept of the alcoholic’s breakfast.
“Thursday Night Football: Not as bad as Jeff Dahmer”
False
The fact of the matter is that as a resident of Indiana, I consider it a personal insult that anyone would support a ticket with Mike Pence on it
I endorse this comment.
http://img.pandawhale.com/105147-The-Dude-sunglasses-gif-Big-Le-A3wK.gif
That’s not an opinion. It’s a fact. You may have the opinion that I’m not justified in feeling that way, but that does not change how I feel
there have been many sad, declined penalties in this fixture
“Thursday Night Football: CTE never takes a day off”
Yeah Cris, god forbid anyone hold Jameis Winston back.
HARF!!!
http://www.bodylovewellness.com/wp-content/uploads/2013/03/well-thats-just-like-your-opinion-man-gif-the-dude-lebowski.gif
There is always another option
http://img.pandawhale.com/73651-Val-Kilmer-Tombstone-gif-I-beg-3w07.gif
Why not the creamiscle color rush uniforms?
http://www.toddradom.com/wp-content/uploads/2013/06/BUCS_LOGO.jpg
“Thursday Night Football: Fuck the Color Blind”
“Thursday Night Football: Fuck You, You’ll Still Watch”
As one of those colorblind people, this actually isn’t too bad. It does look awful like every Color Rush game.
Thursday Night Football: the visual equivalent of a Sudbury Saturday Night
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=sl751CDdRZI
A Soo Steamer.
A Wawa Wankfest.
A Peterborough Pumpfest
My son is trying to set his line-up and replace his defense, which has a bye. He just asked if he should drop “this extra kicker, Josh Brown?”
Me: “Yeah, go ahead, I don’t think he’s going to do much this year.”
That’s funny, usually Josh Brown is the one doing the dropping.
In the unedited, unreleased version of this comment, your son claims he never drafted Brown in the first place.
“Thursday Night Football, sometimes you need a shitty tug job before you get to the good stuff”
Unfortunately, at this point you just have a bloody stub and a gf with carpal tunnel
“Thursday Night Football, because you degenerates will watch anything”
/raises hand enthusiastically
//FUCK YOU, at least it’s not el beisbol
Are you saying we are going to watch the hell out of next Thursday’s matchup?
Thursday Night Football brought to you by wet farts
Hello commentists, I am once again away for work in nowhereville Canadia, it is better than being at my desk dealing with lazy Union fuckwits but this town is awful. Trucks with duelies everywhere. At least there is footbaw and DFO.
Here’s some colour rush for you.
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=HtySGSuKZe8
http://giant.gfycat.com/NastyFrayedBantamrooster.gif
Thisclose to being as good as the Butt Fumble.
The ref falling on his ass just afterward puts it on par with the Butt Fumble for me.
I dare say even better. For one, I saw it in real time and laughed about it with you fellow chucklefucks.
if you’re gonna sneak, maybe don’t line your back up such to make it so goddamned obvious.
I just introduced a co worker to MST3k. I think I just killed all his productivity for the rest of his shift.
The really scary part is that he’s a trauma surgeon.
Diabolical
Re: TNF matchups, I’m generally wondering if these games are a deliberate attempt by the league to test the limits of the profitability of the sport.
Don’t worry, we get the marquee name that is the Factory next week…
That better be a really tall marquee
why is Fumbly McGee still in there? WE WANT BLACK PEYPEY!!!!
For a second I thought that said BLACK RAPEY and was thinking “Eh … I’ll allow it.”
[4] years since Butt Fumble
We need a Sanchenaissance
Oh, Iowa State…
It exists to make people who went to places like NC State feel better about themselves.
As opposed to Iowa Consolidated Metropolitan Statistical Area
Looks like your fella gettin’ BENCHED Scotchy!
Clusterfumbre!
For the down times tonight,
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=EsozpEE543w
“Trainspotting 2? That sounds dumb…”
– me, until about two seconds into the trailer
TE points FOAR NOBODY!!
Samoadown!
/is that racist?
Who needs defense, right?
http://apocalypstick.com/wp-content/uploads/2013/04/patrick-bateman-music.gif
http://40.media.tumblr.com/bbc0ad59ff52eb7e0def7f0e22504944/tumblr_n43fxlj4iL1s5wvh5o2_1280.jpg
/player intros
“Julio Jones. Unstoppable Against U”
Did Matt Ryan age 30 years when nobody was looking?
Sort of, in the sense that nobody has really been paying attention to him for the last thirty years.
I have Mo Sanu in this fixture as well, to give me the box set of desperate fantasy rooting options.
The fucking cannon goes off if Tampa just “reaches” the red zone?!?
Is it such a rare event that it warrants a fucking cannon blast?!?!
Yes
It’s a tribute to the time Rex Grossman got his red wings.
I would run that slant to Evans until they stop it. Not sure how you do, really.
WOOO!!!! Huzzah, black PeyPey!!!!
Who the hell is Dirk Koetter and has he been Tampa Bay’s coach the entire season?
I assume Rapey Jameis met him by his neighborhood pool, or something.
He is the guy that convinced the management to fire Lovie and promote him even though Lovie actually was improving the team. So yes, there all year.
no mas Pheeel y Jeeeem! VIVA!!!
Gonna be one of these kinds of game….
What the holy fucking fuck was I just watching?
These promos…I don’t want to live in a world where a just and loving god allows this kind of shit to happen…
I have a good feeling about tonight’s liveblog. Which is curious, because I have a BAD feeling about a lot of other things: the election, the upcoming Raiders game, this rash…
HillyBob will win, NC will do its part FOAR the blue firewall even if FL falters (which I don’t think it will). Early voting has gone very, very well here.
And my bad SNF feels cancel yours out. We can’t BOTH be right unless MOST GLORIOUS TIE returns, which I’d be happy with.
Just what is a “shank,” anyway?
[raises hand]
[which is coincidentally holding a leg of lamb]
– Andy Reid
Somebody’s never been to prison.
Or to a Raiders game.
A skank that wears a hankie around her neck to hide hickies?
More color rush games…and election ads…
“Color rush” is a pretty good encapsulation of what some states are worried is going to happen at the polls, cough cough North Carolina.
Looks like my intermittent hunger strike against the new layout has failed.
How much weight did you lose? I’m considering trying this new Outrage-Based Diet I keep hearing about
Let’s see…
/steps on scale
Lost 25 pounds!
//removes gut from towel rack
Gained 5.
Unlike Curt Schilling’s sock, mine is stained with real blood.
http://thumbnails116.imagebam.com/51313/4745a5513120605.jpg
Dude, you need to a.) get a new jack sock and b.) see a doctor.
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=MaiNVjr-HAs
This is what a mashed potato apology looks like
Hello fellow football enthusiasts.
Chum.
http://www.reactiongifs.com/r/2012/08/well_done_sir.gif
That will be me at about 1230 when I get home.
Scoping out the new drinking establish the fiancée wants to hit for her bday tomorrow. It’s definitely the kind of place one might find Larry Fitzgerald meeting with local city councilmen about their currently-held-for-price children.
Is there anything interesting on the Internet? Asking because I’ve run out of places to go to avoid reality.
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=PHdPLQdjsfE
You are welcome.
Cool. I need to make that. But for now I’m content with just having made and eaten four tuna sandwiches because I am a monster.
In Sanskrit, ‘monster’ is pronounced ‘hero’.
Oh dear fuck, I have to start a Peyton Barber in my money league tonight.
The lump sum of my poor life choices has never stared at me quite this harshly before, at least without gin being involved.
I flipped a coin between him and Smith. My guy better break a long one.
I would have started Smith, but someone with better Waivers priority claimed him. Fortunately, Barber is at least nominally starting so it looks less shitty than 24 hours ago.
But still….TOTES SHITTY
Figured you would totally embrace a guy with the name of Peyton. I thought I knew you…
It’s being “neck surgery Eskimo brothers” I guess, though I never put my weewee on anybody’s head.