Your “Potential End of the Civilized World Eve” Monday Night Football Open Thread

Everything that needs to be said about this election has already been said. [weighs in] Goddamn it, America! GET THIS RIGHT! You’ve made your share of mistakes just like any other nation but what differentiates you (and Canada, for that matter) from others is that when it really, really counts you step back from the precipice and make the best decision for yourselves and the world at large. This is another one of those times. Get to a voting booth and vote with your heart AND your head and watch the sunrise on Wednesday morning filled with the knowledge that-as small as those steps might be-progress has been made.

Buf/Sea-I don’t think the NFL likes this game. Why? This one should be all about the D. The Bills D-line are a bunch of rambunctious pocket-collapsers and run-stoppers that lead the league with 26 sacks. Seattle is no slouch in that department with 22. Seattle only allows 15.4 points per game and if you subtract the Bills shellacktification by Bill “Does Not Get Swept By Anyone” Belichick’s Pats, they’re in the same room. The Legion of Boom (I know, I don’t like it either) is not going to have a problem with the likes of wr’s Woods and Goodwin. But I also can’t see rb’s Michael/Prosise running wild like Ajayi did a few weeks ago. My guess? This comes down to special teams (Percy Harvin with a KR TD?) or a defensive score.

Enjoy. LET YOUR FINGERS DANCE!!!!

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Gratliff

That’s it for me. I’ll see you motherfuckers after the apocalypse.

Fronkenshteen

RUN THE GODDAMN BALL!!!

The Right Reverend Electric Mayhem

Stop. Showing. How. Badly. We. Were. Jobbed…

King Hippo

down to 1.7. Seattle can just get fucked already.

ballsofsteelandfury

The Bills have Wood and Woods on the team.

/dick joke

Beastmode Ate My Baby

Note: I actually own this, and it’s great.

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blackroseMD1

Damn vultures.

King Hippo

Lead whittled down to 4.7, thanks to only negatives since the pickerception. Didn’t this D used to create negative plays and turnovers, or at least not hemorrhage yards to high school offenses?

Fronkenshteen

Christine Michael has five carries, and therefore should still have EXTREMELY FRESH LEGS.

Senor Weaselo

“But how are his feet?” -Rex

WCS

Rex is going to murder and eat an official before the night is over.

Senor Weaselo

I thought that was Rob’s job.

LemonJello

Rob only eats the hookers that he kills.

King Hippo

please just end 28-17

Fronkenshteen

I suddenly want a fruit roll-up.

Fronkenshteen

Bruised ribs, right there.

litre_cola

Whoa whoa whoa, you mean to tell me a converted basketball player can’t play O line vs a guy named Shaq?

Fronkenshteen

I wonder if we are being subliminally ordered to vote Trump by watching this game?

Senor Weaselo

No, just to join the navy.
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nomonkeyfun

I don’t think he’s ever heard of something so subtle. Hell I think that one of Fozz’ rants would be subtle to him.

Beastmode Ate My Baby

Rexy trash-talking Sherman. We need a hot mic right there.

Fronkenshteen

Gob Bluth’s O-line?

Fronkenshteen

Sorry. Not meant as reply.

Gratliff

After:
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Beastmode Ate My Baby

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Col. Duke LaCross

Hopefully that’ll be her look when she gets called up. Just pants-shittingly terrifying.

Gratliff

Just think, it could be a Bella she tries to interface with.
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Fronkenshteen

Seems Jeff Fisher thinks Todd Gurley should be getting more carries. If only he could have influence over such a thing.

Beastmode Ate My Baby

My FF team agrees.

Fronkenshteen

109-104: Me at the half. Thank jeebus for strong marijuana.

nomonkeyfun

I’d give her a red stripe down her leg.

There is a women’s clothing store in my town that has a sweatshirt with a bunch of patches on it. One is the Nazi Eagle. It has been in the window for a month or so. Unfortunately I’m never home when they are open to yell at them.

Rikki-Tikki-Deadly

“…the Electrical College…”

We’ve secretly replaced Chris Berman with Homer Simpson…let’s see if anyone notices.

...

YOU MUST GRAB ONE OF THEM.

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BrettFavresColonoscopy

Hey, NFL, I’m your target demo and I’m going to sleep. SUCK A DICK, DUMBSHITS

LemonJello

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Senor Weaselo

No raspberry at the end, 2/10 would not bang.

blackroseMD1

I’m genuinely surprised that Rex Ryan didn’t go full Scanners there.

Col. Duke LaCross

Buffalo got seriously jobbed there.

Horatio Cornblower

If I’m the Bills I start running some pick plays into the officials in the second half.

What a clusterfuck.

LemonJello

One power sweep directly into Pete Carrol on the sidelines, just for good measure.

Beastmode Ate My Baby

Santana Garrett:

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LemonJello

A whole lot-o-fuckery going on at the end of this half.

Beastmode Ate My Baby

BLEERGH loves us all!

WCS

Now watch Seattle block this kick, and run it back.

Horatio Cornblower

NFL Officiating: It’s Fantastic!

ThePirateSloth

Seriously, what the fuck just happened

Moose -The End Is Well Nigh

I had some guacamole.

King Hippo

I am not watching, but I assume I lost a D/ST touchdown because I am cursed.

Gratliff

I need a Sasha Banks-Sexy Star match.
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Beastmode Ate My Baby

Asuka or GTFO

Col. Duke LaCross

Serious fear boner.

WCS

TOUCHDOWN SEAHAWKS?

Beastmode Ate My Baby

WAIT WHAT

BrettFavresColonoscopy

I need four more Jimmy Graham TDs not thrown by Russell Wilson in order to win

King Hippo

I hate you and your inability to not lay down for the goddamned shitsucking Bills, SEA defense. THREE points, all I needed. Motherfuckers.

ThePirateSloth

What the fuck just happened?

Moose -The End Is Well Nigh

When a good porn session is ruin by the meandering commenter thought: “She seems nice.”

JustStopDude

You say “circus show”…I say “shit show”…let’s just call the whole thing off…

I’m going to fucking bed.

LemonJello

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...

She seems nice.

BrettFavresColonoscopy

One more for Horatio!

Horatio Cornblower

I do not deserve this but I am not too proud to take it.

Rikki-Tikki-Deadly

Is it me or was that Call of Duty ad surprisingly violent for regular TV?

Horatio Cornblower

I was more surprised that they seem to be advocating playing video games all day instead of voting.

ThePirateSloth

I thought the same thing

WCS

Is it me, or is Call of Duty pointless?

Horatio Cornblower

Not if you enjoy being called a “nagger-faggit” and hearing what your mother’s been up to from a bunch of semi-literate, sugared up 14 yeard olds.

BrettFavresColonoscopy

You’d think if there was ONE word they’d be able to spell correctly…

Gratliff

There is not.

BrettFavresColonoscopy

Yes, Gruden, there are only two players on the court for a given NBA team.

Fronkenshteen

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litre_cola

I have no idea what’s going on here. Too much to process

Horatio Cornblower

I need two more TDs from Graham to make up for forgetting to adjust my line-up and leaving about 20 points on the bench.

I deserve this loss.

JustStopDude

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Fronkenshteen

Avril is gonna get tossed

litre_cola

Like a salad?

Horatio Cornblower

Lavigne? It’s about time; her music was getting played out and now she’s dating the guy from Nickleback!

litre_cola

National disgrace up here, they divorced.

Horatio Cornblower

Wow. I’m so sorry for your country.

Beastmode Ate My Baby

Taeler Hendrix:

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JustStopDude

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BrettFavresColonoscopy

Does she have a name? Because I might need to pull a Seamus and disappear for a while.

Gratliff

Let’s play “Spot the dead people”
http://king-mag.com/files/2009/02/layla2.jpg

BrettFavresColonoscopy

Millions of dead babies on those sheets and in her stomach

litre_cola

I was thinking hair but stomach is acceptable

Gratliff

So she’s a team player

BrettFavresColonoscopy

Oral B is also the name of the most popular Latino in prison.