God damn, there was some quality commenting done on this here blog this past weekend! It was so good that I decided to take today off. Or maybe the quality of the commenting had nothing to do with it. Either way, I was able to catch up on the history of the central bankers of the U.S. , Britain, France and Germany and how their gorsh-darn shenanigans helped to plunge the world into The Great Depression. I read this stuff so that if I were to talk to someone in a social setting during the up-coming holiday festivities I’ll be able to bore the shit out of them and they’ll think twice about engaging me in conversation for years to come. TO THE GAME!
Bal/NE– Master Brady has a fine won/loss record vs. the Ravens but his stat line is wanting. His 10/10 TD/Int is Elisha-esque at best. As always, in order for the Ravens to pull this off they must put together a monster defensive game. They may be able to do that-by most metrics and some Imperial Standards they have the mightiest D in the land. There’s some squawk out there that says rb Dixon is ready to bust out and that would suit all Ravens backers just fine. To no one’s surprise, wr Amendola has got a case of the ouchies and won’t be playing.
Can we possibly top yesterday? I SAY YES! DO IT!
I also for some reason have a sudden urge to make a trip to the dentist .
I just blocked that image via uBlock.
Malcolm Mitchell owes me $700
Wow, you know what I like about this chat? How balanced it is, y’know?
brb, going to the first page.
I’m having fun. I’m glad at least one of us here is.
“Orange is the new black” is what Richie Incognito called Cortland Finnegan.
who got fired? only saw tail end of thingy where Fassel was interim
The Mustache
Jeff Fisher.
At long, long last.
FISHER!
ELITE-ception
Oh fuck this game.
In my Yahoo league my opponent has Brady and Mitchell. Went from 92% favorite to 60% in one play.
Exxxxcelllent
I’m streaming the game because my wife and her sister are in the middle of a Gossip Girl marathon. I’ve learned one of the characters was written off the show because the actress went sort of crazy and started a band:
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=rHBxJCq99jA
Not horrible, I guess, but I thought it was HILARIOUS that according to Wikipedia she cites “Kurt Cobain, The Beatles, Led Zeppelin, The Who, Pink Floyd, AC/DC” as some of her musical influences. I mean, come on.
Isn’t the fat girl from Mad Men on that show?
Well, I’ll live tweet her funeral in 4 years.
Counterpoint:
Welp, I’m finding other stuff to do.
Can’t you use your deity powers to strike down Dreamboat? Or, can that only happen on Thursdays?
Aaaand back to a mildly-unlikely score.
WOOOO MALCOLM MITCHELL WOOOO
http://thumbnails117.imagebam.com/52006/a5549b520055627.jpg?nc
Hey, any of you guys know where I can get a tasty and balanced IPA?
Fuck it. I’m forcing it in here.
http://115.imagebam.com/download/bzxim1BR2XMTsiuss_IBug/50331/503302548/Screen%20Shot%202016-09-06%20at%205.20.58%20AM.png
Glen Goolie, For The Best of Times.
SOMEBODY CHECK EDELMAN’S LOCKER FOR 30 PIECES OF SILVER BECAUSE HE’S BETRAYING TOM BRADY!!!
His cornerback had him on Shylock-down.
This never fails to make me laugh, even more so today:
http://images4.wikia.nocookie.net/__cb20120406154302/collegefootballmania/images/0/0a/Jeff-Fisher_Chicago_Bears.png
Bill Belichick has gone through more random white guys in his career than Gaetan Dugas.
I have no idea who that is but I’m liking this post because it will make me look smart.
The alleged Patient Zero for bringing AIDS to the US. His role has been debunked.
Apparently he was quite the slut however.
Jon Gruden is so bad I use the n-word to describe him.
Nuisance.
He really nags my nerves.
Fuck marry kill: Jon Gruden, Cris Collinsworth, Phil Simms
Suicide.
Nuke the site from orbit. It’s the only way to be sure.
May as well give this to Buddy now.
http://115.imagebam.com/download/v5iD2jWIKRtFJUafi30wPw/49196/491952349/tumblr_nswf52YL771rj6lpxo1_400.gif
Hue Jackson wants Terrelle Pryor to stop trash talking.
I mean isn’t that the only talking you do when you’re 0-13?
Rob Gronkowski was nominated for his work with unwed mothers.
His work helping them get their start.*
*old Steve Martin joke.
Only because Brady couldn’t win it again
Damnit. Beaten to the joke.
Alternative:
“I didn’t know crushing puss was a philanthropic pursuit.”
\Horatio’s was better. Double damnit.
Confession: The reason you’re all being sent back to the first page is because the fine folks at Revolution Brewing paid me to rig the page so you can repeatedly read about how delicious and balanced Revolution’s Anti-Hero IPA really is.
Insidious and profitable.
(Spycam footage of ICRM)
http://115.imagebam.com/download/cntrkTbszQLUWbtotsQ10g/47815/478143579/227610.jpg
Hey hey hey…
Where’s Dad’s cut?
UPDATE: I’m working on it. Probably something with the WP 4.7 update.
That update sounds like a euphemism for masturbating.
What doesn’t, really?
Hold on, testing this bug.
That’s how I got herpes.
I find it funny how terrorists think 72 virgins is actually a reward in the afterlife.
Enjoy your sloppy ineffective beej, Anwar.
Those virgins are actually 14-year-old Dungeon and Dragon enthusiasts.
Nope. Goats. Virgin goats.
so not only sloppy, but also rather reticent smgdh
41, not 14
Related note, I was doing a job in the middle east with a guy from Malaysia. Basically my age, but married with a very young son. We were doing crazy hours on these cranes…so eventually we got comfortable enough to talk to each other and ask questions…that you know…you would never normally ask.
So I bug him “Hey Halim…can you…like marry more than one woman in Malaysia”
“Yes. It is not very common. Very rich people do it, but its just not very common anymore”
“You ever thought about having…you know…a second Sarah?”
“Never”
“Why?”
“Two mother in laws…two sets of dates to remember…two women to disappoint on a regular basis. This sounds like hell to me”
“DUDE! THAT’S EXACTLY WHAT I WOULD THINK!”
So is this happening to anyone else?
Every time I post something, the thread reloads back to the 1st page of comments. Its fucking annoying as hell.
Yeah, happening to me too, very weird.
It’s happening to me too.
Yeah, I thought is was only me.
http://i37.tinypic.com/2m64v3r.jpg
Evening all, I’m in a warehouse in Brooklyn playing opera. It is quite cold in the pit. We’re an act in and it is very well attended. And Brooklyn Brewery runs the bar. Oh yeah, there’s a bar. No, I don’t drink on the clock, have you tried playing opera drunk? Not a good idea.
So how’s the game?
Have you tried watching an open sober? Not a good idea.
Les Miserables.
Used to attend opera and get semi-buzzed off Irish coffees during the intervals in high school. Less fun than it sounds, mainly because I was too paranoid about drunkenly pissing off fellow attendees to actually enjoy the show.
http://thumbnails115.imagebam.com/49512/5bdba8495119245.jpg
http://www.beheadingboredom.com/wp-content/uploads/2014/05/elsa-stop-making-people-fall.gif
“So Coach Harbaugh, what has been the source of your troubles so far tonight?”
“Suzy I have this itch that just won’t quit on my grundle, and I am 5 minutes away from developing full-on swamp ass. So didja blow Namath after that game in ’03?”
Shea McClellin proves that as soon as you leave the Bears, you’re not shitty*.
*Offer does not apply to Chris Conte
Of course, the Patriots are putting him on special teams where he belongs.
He did fuck up and boot the ball out of the endzone on punt coverage earlier.
That was pretty cool. You could see it coming too.
Needed that. I hate to give it to them, but
WOOOOO BLOCKED FIELD GOAL WOOOOO
Let’s talk repeatedly about how Tucker never misses a kick so everyone can know he’ll miss one.
JINX
Holy shit, that actually worked…
You know who could really knock it in from here? Ray Rice. Whatever happened to that guy?
He’s been knocking them out in Atlantic City
Flacco went full “fuck it” on that throw.
God dammit, that was a fucking fullback. Get it together, dipshits.
Does someone want to fucking tackle him?
Jets-ian effort from the Pats D there
I didn’t know Mike Alstott was still in the league.
I don’t know guys, I think Brady might be kind of a prick.
He is. One that gets stuck inside the latest model.
I never understood that rule about punts, why isn’t it dead when you touch it? If you’re ever downing a pun outside the 20, just kick it into the endzone and it’s a touchback!
When you sign in, it says prove your humanity so I get the math question wrong and jerk it to Emily Ratajkowski instead.
Humanity, not American.
What’s with all the ads showing Christmas lights in the fucking woods? I thought the whole point of dragging people out there was to let them die in the cold and dark.
If you don’t finish your Dean Pees you’ll never get to be a head coach!