There are a smattering of Premiership games this morning, with Manure hosting 15th position Middlesbrough (10:00, NBCSN) getting feature treatment. Leicester/West Ham and Chelsea/Stoke are probably better options in the morning window, though. Consult your Extra Time listings.
But the big action (Euro-speaking) today is at Anfield, where the 2nd place Shite host 3rd position (and 1 point behind) Man City (12:30, NBC). Of course, my NBC affiliate is pre-empting the match for…sigh…syndicated ACC hoops. The South ,, amirite?? Anyway, I shall send good vibes to the Manc blues for this one, naturally. This “Klopp title challenge” talk needs strangling in the crib.
EPL fun boomerangs right back around Monday/Tuesday, so I will preview that during or right after Hippo Thoughts.
Citrus Bowl – LSU vs. Louisville (11:00, ABC)
Both of these teams pretty much fell slam-ass apart down the stretch, so I have no clue what to expect. 2017’s most overrated fantasy prospect (yeah, I said it, wanna fight about it??) Leonard Fournette isn’t playing, so it won’t be as easy to compare and contrast how his backup does exactly the same thing.
Gator Bowl – Georgia Tech vs. Kentucky (11:00, ESPN)
This used to be a pretty proud, high-value destination bowl. Now look at it. Stripped of its name, hosting these two bleeding sacks of shit. Of course, now that I’ve said this…game of the day, for certain.
National Semifinal #1 – Alabama vs. Washington (3:00, ESPN)
Definitely the fixture of the day, so of course NC State’s basketball opener happens right in the middle of it. Lots of chuckles about Nick Saban and “coachspeak” regarding his statements re the Huskies being the best side his team have faced, and a stern/unique test…but I think it’s true. UW is very, very fast, and can hit you in many different ways. They won’t let Roll Damn Tide dictate the terms of play, and that’s 90% of the battle. I am interested.
But FUCK YOU, I will not list your meaningless bowl title. National. Semifinal.
National Semifinal #2 – Clemson vs. Ohio State (7:00, ESPN)
Just thunder fuck both of these asshole programs/coaches right in the ass, please. I know I will be cheering for whoever wins match #1 to win it all, that’s for sure. Maybe it will be a good, entertaining game, or barring that, at least over in plenty of time for me to defiantly crash out before midnight. I will not give 2016 the satisfaction of a goodbye, even with a middle finger.
Reminder to self when I eventually get to looking for assistants.
It was so odd seeing Tom Hanks surrounded by tits and ass. Good movie too.
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=VQ666-W8XHo&feature=youtu.be&t=6s
Amy Adams, bro. Not nearly as gratuitous in showing off her ass as Night At The Museum 2 (!?!?!) was (Amelia Earhart was not even remotely as good looking as Amy)
Be honest, he’s Tom Hanks. If he wanted to, he would be surrounded by all the T&A he wants.
Random. https://gfycat.com/faroffcraftyhare
Happy new year east coasters.
Except you trump
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=FCPutYaGFlE
Let’s get DRUNK!
Happy New Year!
http://68.media.tumblr.com/9daac2272b223043045f34984e2b7cd5/tumblr_ngueo5WZ3h1u65bxno2_1280.jpg
Happy New Year.
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=NCtzkaL2t_Y
Has SF reportedly planning to dump Trent and chip been addressed?
To the extent of “Fuck Chip”
I didn’t finish reading the headline before I started cackling
Let’s Dance East Coast!
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=yhASu2OjEcQ
http://68.media.tumblr.com/ee22ef6d1134dbf76cea77cdb4c938c9/tumblr_ohiek4vvji1vwbwc9o1_1280.gif
Happy New Year east coast Commentists!
http://68.media.tumblr.com/a1d029e4c8456ceedb48101733014ec7/tumblr_oix8wknYsU1thadqso1_500.jpg
Happy New Years you East Coast dick slappers and bean flickers!
Piss off, 2016.
http://68.media.tumblr.com/b04a864b145f4cc8ad521d8761eaa3dc/tumblr_o0i68fnq7o1saxfomo1_1280.jpg
http://68.media.tumblr.com/d081505a3ca4046571696976e60411d7/tumblr_oiwvbvcCmG1sbq0d1o1_400.jpg
http://media.giphy.com/media/DPjsQWpsx1uYU/giphy-tumblr.gif
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=C_qWlPCEnGM
¡HAPPY NEW YEAR EAST COAST PERVERTS!
Since I am on the theme of Japanese cinema, and particularity Yakuza films…ever wonder why when a member pisses off a boss, they must cut off a finger?
This is throw back to samurai times. To use the sword properly, all the downward force is brought down with both hands, but with the lower digits on the right hand acting like a trigger finger. So when a samurai pissed of his master, this was a form of self punishment. Basically imagine a gun slinger from the old west cutting off the index finger on his shooting hand.
Also in Japan, tattoos are still culturally not acceptable for people unless they are in construction or the Yakuza. For example, I could never go to a traditional bath house in Japan because I have many military tattoos.
The Yakuza in Japan tends to make most of their drug income off of methamphetamine, which has a very long history of usage in Asia since WWII…just look at North Korea.
The traditional tolerance of Yakuza are going away. Major gambling and match fixing scandals involving MMA (which is why MMA is dead in the country) and in Summo has killed their perception in the public eyes. Interestingly, they actually print their own magazine, similar to industry magazines.
The US has been heavily pressuring the Japanese government to start stamping down on organized crime and this is why its no longer acceptable for sitting politicians to hang out with them anymore.
Yeah, well. We’ll see how long that pressure continues once Trump is in office.
Just stopping by to say happy new year to all you lovable miscreants.
http://68.media.tumblr.com/8efb29a080a7b8f722052442aca7e942/tumblr_ohzmp9YTJW1tp0mqvo1_500.gif
Just finished some NYE surf n turf. Crab legs aren’t even as expensive as I thought! C’mon Rapey Jameis!
Selena had such a fat ass, such a waste
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=JsUt2jsLM1k
How do I always forget about the third act of Casino where Sharon Stone turns into my motherfucking grandmother (except she was just crazy, not drunk and crazy).
She used to look like Ginger, too.
Best New Year’s Movie. Go!
Strange Days?
Although I guarantee everyone will go for When Harry Met Sally
No love for Ghostbusters II. It wasn’t that bad.
It even includes a relatively understated Vincent D’Onofrio villain
http://68.media.tumblr.com/tumblr_m0ch9riwdl1r42859o1_500.gif
My Sex Robot
Ghostbusters 2
Five more months and I can leave Reno. Fuck 2016!
Holy shit! Is that where you are? I’m surprised you’re still alive.
Over-under on the number of hookers you’ve met in otherwise normal circumstances: 3
It’s a colder methy version of Las Vegas with mountains. It’s ok but I was sent up here to take over an office but got fucked in the deal when the owner sold. The new owner is cool with me moving……….and working from home. NO PANTS! NO SHAVE!
Where are you escaping back to?
Las Vegas, my parents live there. I enjoy the West Coast too. I’ll retire to San Antonio when the time is right.
Reno seems fun.
I use instantwatcher.com to keep track of new Netflix and Amazon Prime releases. It’s great for Netflix but requires massaging with AP because anyone can and does upload any and all of the most useless shit imaginable and instantwatcher doesn’t filter it out of Amazon’s API.
* Escorts
* My Sex Robot
Netflix has apparently lowered their standards as well.
Three more comments and we can lock the thread down.
“Lock” as in no more comments?
Too late. We flew by the 666 mark
Nearly chopping my thumb off means I didn’t chop my thumb off. 2016 ends with me scraping by yet again.
Cheers.
http://68.media.tumblr.com/d99225692d1c13badb202922af248520/tumblr_ogshe5abt11t3xsi5o1_500.gif
http://68.media.tumblr.com/7c8a825a43ec22de369ebdb83a7ef38f/tumblr_oe3c3ex30v1uwfmauo1_500.jpg
YES, I’LL HAVE MILK PLEASE!
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=TiLbxV4cRaA
Time for an oldie
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=b90Cf6ARscc
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=0X_lxh_KeeE
When I become Evil Overlord of the Earth, the New Years Show will be done by a hologram/robot/cloned Dick Clark depending on the available technology of the time.
You should make it be Dick Cheney. He seems like the kind of guy would enjoy that.
No. I may be Evil, but I’m not heartless.
Inverse Cheney?
My vote is a clone of Johnny Carson bloody stinking drunk.
Jesus was like your sort-of-friend who left you at a dive bar and said he’d leave your name on the waiting list at the hippest club in town. Then when you get there it’s a toss-up.
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=frqbodVO3gU
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=mXuu4MRVfAg
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=vkLOg252KRE
Hippo, I think you and I should be friends. I like your music taste. It’s ok you’re a Donkey fan. What are you thoughts on Game of Thrones and Brexit?
Ever watch the “Dirty Harry” films and think…”Man I wish there was a cop that wasn’t such a goddamn pussy hippy?”
Then I got a film for YOU!
Sticking with tonight’s theme of Takeshi, I present his first ever film. Now a little background…
Takeshi started his career as basically a standup comedian. He was part of a duo known as “Two Beats” with Takeshi playing the traditional funny man in the form of Manzai (think “whose on first” bits only the art goes back about 2000 years even before the Endo period).
So our man here Takeshi is just a standup comedian. Out of the blue he wrote, directed, and starred in the film “Violent Cop”, a MASSIVE departure from what people knew him for.
https://youtu.be/GGQlJ-HXEu4
The film opens with a group of young kids tormenting a homeless dude. It is implied the that the dude may have died. The one kid goes home and almost immediately Violent Cop shows up at the door.
He basically beats the crap out of a minor.
Takeshi’s career has include game shows, talk shows, comedy, drama, painting, music, books, and even making an infamous game called Takeshi no Chōsenjō, know for being one of the most batshit, insane viedo games of all time.
It is estimated that he is on Japanese TV about 8 times a week and that politicians actually seek out his audience because so many people turn up for his shit. An utterly fascinating man. He is also not one to fuck with as apparently in 1986, a tabloid printed information that he took offense to and was arrested for breaking the arms of the person that wrote it.
Correction…this is the first film he heavily wrote, starred, and directed. The original director and him did not get along. So the director left the project and recommended to the studio to completely hand the project over to him.
Also, all the weird movies I have been talking about are available on Amazon Prime for free if you have of course…Amazon Prime.
Speaking of which…fucking christ they need to fix their goddamn interface. Its impossible to find movies and the way the films are classified, I am convinced no one actually checks to see if it makes sense.
Amazon’s app interface would be instantly approved if they’d stop listing TV series by season and just grouped them together like every other fucking app.
You seem to be a big fan of Japanese cinema. Should I bother with the two Outrage movies that have been sitting in my Netflix queue for 2 years? I saw 20 minutes of it when I first queued them up but got distracted. Seemed appropriately violent.
Upon further review, it also stars Takeshi Kitano. Japanese stars really know how to dominate genres.
I enjoyed both of the films. I think they are worth watching. Takeski got some flack for Outrage because he was trying to make a more ensemble performance rather than having his character as the focus. So its a bit of a departure from his style.
Japanese films tend to be formulaic…which is pretty much the same for US films. Takeshi has his own style. I mean a Takeshi film is going to be slower pacing than most modern Japanese films.
He is basically the Japanese version of Tarantino.
New theory: The Rapture is occurring but instead of the Righteous vanishing at once, they are leaving one at a time to go to Heaven while us sinners stay down here to experience Hell on Earth.
Seems like a fair argument.
I think you just described the teachings of Catholicism.
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=lbahpgNDFrE
Topical title:
My wine is finished, so FUCK IT so am I. Thanks for making the wretched chore of life significantly less burdensome. The upside of American Fuhrer is that at least it will all be over soon. Here’s to, as Homer Simpson sagely put it, the cool comfort of the grave!!
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=gY8iy8S0S4w
Fuck it. I’m making a sandwich.
Toast the bread and add avocado to the sandwich. I find it to be the perfect balance.
Happy New Year Anyway!
It’s only 8pm on the Best Coast.
Dabo Swinney is making me seriously contemplating rooting for ‘Bama.
Dabo! IS seriously that bad. Those of us in The unaffiliated South are largely rooting for Bama. Straightforward evil >> hypocritical faux-Christian Jeebus Camp evil.
Team METEOR
THE BEST NYE song EVAR!
The Oatmeal remains terrifying as ever.
Sinfest has an interesting twist. Normally it drops its ultra-Liberal, men-hating storylines to show the year as a old man trying to escape death.
Now 2016 has turned into a Devil who wants to destroy everything. So its going for a non-fiction storyline this year.
I don’t know how to get into web comics any more. I started reading PA when that shit first came out, and I’ve sort of kept up with it, so it doesn’t require much digging, but everything’s 15-20 years old at this point, and I get like 3 strips in before quitting.
I found Bob and George by searching Mega Man, but it ended in 2006.
I found Sinfest on TV Tropes. About two years ago, the author changed the story and now instead of being a show about people, the Devil and sin, its a story about how women and gays are the only good people, heterosexual men are evil and in league with God. I don’t know what happened to the author, but mostly I still check it out for morbid curiosity. Its like if DFO suddenly changed to be a website about bicycles.
*instead of God I meant Devil, but in the story somehow God and Jesus aren’t good because they are part of the Patriarchy because they are based on men.
all I can say for 2017 is that I live in a major MSA and less than 10 miles from a major nuclear power plant. I will be ash before I have time to shit my pants in fear OR pain! Hahahahaham take that, slow dying suckers!!!!
I’ve never understood the preppers…that spend gobs and gobs of cash…so they can prep and then die of the flu six months after everyone else.
I want to go in the flash man…
Stupid people doing stupid shit? Tell me more.
DAMN SKIPPY
I’m a four hour drive from Canada and I took high school French. J’ai une évasion, mon ami!
http://117.imagebam.com/download/dbzBr_08AiejHbOGKywS3Q/52380/523794751/Screen%20Shot%202016-12-31%20at%207.33.43%20PM.png
I feel like I should give boogie nights a fresh watch since I haven’t seen it since I was a desperate 14 year old wanting to see Heather Graham’s tits.
OH, THAT SCOTTY!!
that was a valid reason to watch, but YES deserves MOAR
Was that from last night’s Ronda Rousey fight?
The gif is about 4 seconds too long to be from her last fight.
http://117.imagebam.com/download/KHZdyEOFlGBcxITRvThm-A/52380/523795841/Screen%20Shot%202016-12-31%20at%207.54.12%20PM.png
mah homey!!