Request Line: Free Agency

Rikki-Tikki-Deadly

Rikki-Tikki-Deadly

Law-abiding Raiders fan, pet owner, Los Angeles resident.
Rikki-Tikki-Deadly

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INT. RECORDING STUDIO – EVENING

The radio booth sits empty.  A pair of radio professional are chatting casually in the outer office in front of a massive new piece of equipment. 

CONOR, THE INTERN: …so when does she get back?

PRODUCER: In two weeks.  It’s been pretty great.  I’ve been letting the animals sleep upstairs, I haven’t done the dishes in three days, I’ve been to In N Out four times already…I do miss her, though.

CONOR, THE INTERN: So you’re sure you trust this thing?  People won’t know the difference? [pats the machine]

DJ 3000: HEY HEY HANDS OFF THE MERCHANDISE.  WHAT IS THIS, A MISS UNIVERSE PAGEANT?

CONOR: [shrugs approvingly] Hmm.

PRODUCER: It’ll be fine.  It’s too bad we couldn’t line up a real guest for the week, but I guess everybody is pretty wrapped up with contract negotiations and stuff. Anyway, I…

—–[door flies open]—–

COLIN KAEPERNICK: WOO HOO!  SPRING BREAK!  YEAH!

PRODUCER: What the…?

KAEPERNICK: Hey guys!  How’s it going?

CONOR: Um…good, I guess.  What are you doing here?

KAEPERNICK: Didn’t you hear?  I’m a FREE AGENT, BABY!  I go where I want!

PRODUCER: Huh.  O-kay…

KAEPERNICK: So I heard you guys have a radio show where NFL personalities play host for listener requests and I thought I’d come down and offer my services.

PRODUCER: That’s, uh, very gracious of you, Colin.  You’ve got a topic you want to cover?

KAEPERNICK: I sure do!

PRODUCER: Wow, okay.  Looks like our evening got a lot more interesting.

DJ 3000: HEY WHAT AM I CHOPPED LIVER?

CONOR: [discreetly unplugs DJ 3000]

PRODUCER: Go on into the booth, Colin, we’ll talk to you from out here.

KAEPERNICK: [pulls out earphones, wraps them up] Hold these for me?  [tosses them towards the PRODUCER but doesn’t set his feet properly and the headphones sail six feet wide of the mark]

KAEPERNICK heads into the booth and gets set at the desk.  The PRODUCER taps a button and they run though a quick soundcheck.

PRODUCER: All right, sounding good.  We’re live in three, two, one…

KAEPERNICK: Ladies and gentlemen, welcome to Request Line.  I’m your host Colin Kaepernick.  Tonight, we’re looking for requests for songs about how good it feels to be a FREE AGENT! Songs about flying solo, songs about not being tied down, songs about how you restructured your contract to gamble on yourself and then went on to win one game in eleven starts and that one was by just a single point, songs about how you almost put together the biggest comeback in Super Bowl history but instead now all anyone remembers you for is because you had your headphones on too loud and didn’t notice the national anthem starting so you didn’t stand up and then you tried to play it off as a political thing which worked okay for a while but then people found out you didn’t vote and got REALLY mad, songs about how you’re going to spend the free agency period waiting by the phone hoping that someone, ANYONE will call up and make you feel like they actually want you to play for their team…[shakes his head, pulls himself together]…but let’s get to the music.  Call it in, I’ll give it a spin!  I’ll get us started with a DOUBLE SHOT from The Who.

 

Rikki-Tikki-Deadly
Rikki-Tikki-Deadly
Law-abiding Raiders fan, pet owner, Los Angeles resident.
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scotchnaut

how did this get missed?

https://youtu.be/wf73xqZvk6k

laserguru

This works.

laserguru

JerBear50
JerBear50

laserguru

Topically.

JerBear50
JerBear50

JerBear50
JerBear50

theeWeeBabySeamus

Don T

Whisky sin soda – Joaquín Sabina
https://youtube.com/watch?v=6Er8mg5tJkE
What am I gonna do / if I like whisky without soda.
Sex without nuptials / sorrows with bread.
What am I gonna do / if I like love without jealousy, death without wakes.

But melodiously. Thought it fit.

Bloody Lethal
Bloody Lethal

/SPAM over

comment image

Bloody Lethal
Bloody Lethal

Bloody Lethal
Bloody Lethal

Bloody Lethal
Bloody Lethal

Let him come back in man.

Bloody Lethal
Bloody Lethal

Just found the funkiest Leonard Cohen cover.

Bloody Lethal
Bloody Lethal

Bloody Lethal
Bloody Lethal

My cousin just had a son which he named Gus. Augustus that is.

nomonkeyfun

Thief!!!!!!

/jk Great minds think alike and all that jazz.

Bloody Lethal
Bloody Lethal

The name or the song?

nomonkeyfun

Song, because apparently I don’t have a great mind and can’t reply properly.

SonOfSpam

Late to the party, gonna add Zeppelin. Apologies if this has been done. (NO! NEVER APOLOGIZE FOR ZEPPELIN!!!)

Low Commander of the Super Soldiers

For Balls and the Maiden contingent:

Iron Maiden – Running Free

Low Commander of the Super Soldiers

Apparently my Maiden comment was marked as spam. I blame the guy above me.

Don T

Franz Ferdinand – Well Now That Was Easy

Bloody Lethal
Bloody Lethal

Low Commander of the Super Soldiers

While I’m more of a fan of the Soundgarden original, when Johnny Cash covers your song, you play it.

Johnny Cash – Rusty Cage

Bloody Lethal
Bloody Lethal

Don T

The Fratellis – Shameless

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=p4Dz2gFmyB8

“Well there’s nothing left to add before I leave”, and just picks up steam

entropy

Let’s have a little Joe Strummer:

Don T

Sinatra – I Wish I Were In Love Again

Unsurprised
Unsurprised

Is there anyone the Jets didn’t cut yesterday?

Senor Weaselo

Me, unfortunately.

Bloody Lethal
Bloody Lethal

This is a free agent montage song…

King Hippo

Here’s a free agency song, with a MOAR traditionally Hippo mental state flava:

King Hippo

pretty sure this ain’t been picked…

litre_cola

King Hippo

this were in my head earlier…THAT’S GOOD MUZIK HUSTLE!!

Bloody Lethal
Bloody Lethal

Bloody Lethal
Bloody Lethal

You may be a free agent but….

Bloody Lethal
Bloody Lethal

Pretty sure you can hear Mark Knopfler here.

Bloody Lethal
Bloody Lethal

NVM I’m wrong. It was two years prior to his Knopfler-produced album.

Moose -The End Is Well Nigh
Moose -The End Is Well Nigh
Senor Weaselo

Lyrics say count it!

Game Time Decision

does free for a few days count?

Bloody Lethal
Bloody Lethal

Bloody Lethal
Bloody Lethal

Double shot.

Bloody Lethal
Bloody Lethal

Low Commander of the Super Soldiers

Low Commander shoots for three!

BrettFavresColonoscopy

nomonkeyfun

Tim Hardin- Simple Song of Freedom
https://youtu.be/3uVcr7LIusc

Low Commander of the Super Soldiers

2 weeks before Irish X-Mas, but incoming Flogging Molly DOUBLE SHAWT:

Every Dog Has It’s Day:

Low Commander of the Super Soldiers

Black Friday Rule: