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25 Questions About….

ballsofsteelandfury

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,

vacations.  As you may or may not know, I am getting on a big plane today which will take me across the Atlantic for a nice week and a half of not-working. Whenever one goes on vacations, there are always…. questions.

1- Am I getting laid on this vacation?

2- Is it weird that married people ask question #1 above?

3- Why is vacation sex such a big deal?

4- Is it because you’re doing it with random strangers that you are never going to see again?

5- Isn’t that just the same as if you were living in Los Angeles or New York?

6- Is your significant other upset that you answered YES to question #4?

7- What is up with those people that are married or in relationships yet decide to vacation separately?

8- If you really don’t like the same things, why the fuck are you married?

9- Is it because of the children?

10- Don’t you think they know already and you’re not fooling anyone?

11- Are you that much of an idiot that you don’t think it’s weird that milk would be home-delivered in this day and age?

12- Or should you be more concerned with delivery men?

13- Then again, they’re on a schedule and most of them look like this guy, don’t they?

14- If you are a delivery man and you see that you have a package delivery from Adam and Eve dot com, are you secretly hoping the lady of the house is hot and home and that she greets you in a see-through negligee and that she invites you in to see if what she ordered works?

15- Have you ever seen a delivery lady?

16- Why is this delivery girl a Dale Jr. fan?

17- Kinda takes the fantasy away, don’t it?

18- How is it possible that a Google Image Search for “UPS girl” gave this as the sixth result?

19- Is that one of Low Commander’s Photoshops?

20- Is that Germany or France?

21- Are you even paying attention to what I’m typing?

22-  I could type out my passport number, social security number, home address and you wouldn’t even notice, right?

23- Wait, where was I?

24- Oh yeah, does it look like this girl is on vacation?

25- You think she might be headed to Spain, like me?

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entropy

Going through an older sketch book and found this, and somehow I knew you guys would be the right audience:

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BrettFavresColonoscopy

Sometimes I can’t tell if the gifkakke means Moose really likes a thread or thinks it needs spicing up.

2
Moose -The End Is Well Nigh

In this case it is both.

That plus a poor attitude and goofing off at work; don’t tell any one.

http://farm4.staticflickr.com/3677/11694110776_d2738a0908_o.gif

Also; vacation FAIL is pretty inspiring, no?

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Moose -The End Is Well Nigh

Maybe the “moderators” should inhibit my graphic posting privileges.

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Moose -The End Is Well Nigh

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Moose -The End Is Well Nigh

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Moose -The End Is Well Nigh

http://big.assets.huffingtonpost.com/Bulldog-Fall-570.gif

Still probably the least problematic vacation companion if you are doing the road trip.

1
Moose -The End Is Well Nigh

I’ve semi-recently been to beaches near LA and Sam Diego and have not seen this; is it a thing now? I’d like it to be because failure is hilarious.

http://www.gifbin.com/bin/072010/1278928063_beach-faceplant.gif

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Moose -The End Is Well Nigh

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Beerguyrob

20- Is that Germany or France?

Dunno, but I’d like to see her underpants.

2
theeWeeBabySeamus

18- How is it possible that a Google Image Search for “UPS girl” gave this as the sixth result?

That poor girl was having to hold onto the tree (giggity) to keep from falling over forward. The good news is that she would have bounced.

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Moose -The End Is Well Nigh

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Low Commander of the Super Soldiers

Please. If that was one of mine, Dean Spanos would be on fire in the background and I’d be having trouble deciding which thing to masturbate to first.

5
BrettFavresColonoscopy

There’s a difference between NEVER vacationing together and once in a blue moon taking a vacation separately. I’m all for both a couples’ trip and an occasional “I’m going to tour a bunch of distilleries and eat alone at bars in a place I don’t speak the language” trip.

3
King Hippo

Agree. I think FOAR me, the ideal would be to alternate years (trips together, trips apart). Because most functioning couples have a healthy balance of shit they both like, and shit the other has absolutely no interest in.

The functionality comes from not being threatened by the latter part.

3
Moose -The End Is Well Nigh

Unfortunately I have always vacationed separately from my spouse.*

http://s1.totalprosports.com/wp-content/uploads/2013/06/alana-blanchard-waterfall-gif-hot-female-athlete-gifs.gif

*Imaginary spouse.

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LemonJello

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Moose -The End Is Well Nigh

[unintentional stripping]
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JerBear50

Still less embarrassing than this one.
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The Right Reverend Electric Mayhem

Kentucky?

4
nomonkeyfun

How will you survive in Spain if you only speak Mexican?

7
King Hippo

He’ll just say “taco, taco, burrito” over and over and he’ll at least not starve ,, smgdh

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Rikki-Tikki-Deadly

Nicaragua! Managua!

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The Right Reverend Electric Mayhem

Is that a vaguely-racist version of Duck Duck Goose?

2
LemonJello

The Formula One Centipede?

1
Unsurprised

They don’t have tacos or burritos in Spain, those fucking animals.

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Enrico Pallazzo

(Puts on redneck glasses)

Sir, I believe that she is wearing Dale Jarrett’s #88 and not Dale Earnhardt Jrs. I could be wrong though seeing as how I have never burnt a couch or fucked a family member.

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ballsofsteelandfury

Well, I’ll be damned. I stand corrected:

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Unsurprised

The 88 has nothing to do with NASCAR.

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ballsofsteelandfury

Believe it or not, there is a new girl at work that has a similar body shape to the blonde in the picture above. Rail-thin legs and torso and a gigantic set of knockers. I honestly don’t know how she keeps her balance.

2
King Hippo

I knew a gal (even played el tenis with her!) like that, too. I always worried about her lower back. Yes, the bewbs were fake, and yes, they got in the way of her tennising.

And of course she was an entertainer. One of those Ron Paul gold-hoarders, too. But outside of that, very soft-spoken and nice.

0
BallsofLacrosseAndMapleSyrup

In the pic she’s got an arm on the tree to keep herself upright…..

1
LemonJello

tWBS can’t even hold the damn camera steady. I thought he was a better photographer than that! smdh…

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Moose -The End Is Well Nigh

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ballsofsteelandfury

That’s amazing.

1
LemonJello

Oh yeah?
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You’re right, she’s better.

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Unsurprised

Y’all hiring?

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jjfozz

My buddy disappeared for an entire day and night when we all went to Orlando for a wedding.

He came back and said, “That was the weirdest thing I’ve ever fucked.”

He never clarified what he meant by that statement, but I think somewhere in Florida there’s an alligator that needs severe therapy.

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Moose -The End Is Well Nigh

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LemonJello

Oil Check! That’s just good preventative maintenance!

This, is not:
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nomonkeyfun

I see they’re holding auditions for another 3 stooges movie.
We all know there was only one redeeming feature to that piece of horseshit.

http://i1206.photobucket.com/albums/bb442/mrm3300/kate-upton-nun.gif

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LemonJello

Two features.

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Horatio Cornblower

She’s got the Rocks of Gibraltar that’s for sure, amirite?

/Hauled off stage by Union Jack-themed hook

5
Beerguyrob

It goes better with “Yakety Sax”.

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ZnHmskwqCCQ

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