Your “Just One More Playoff To Go” Monday Evening Open Thread

Beerguyrob

Beerguyrob

A Canadian man-child of indeterminate age, he stays young by selling alcohol at sporting events and yelling at the patrons he serves. Their rage nourishes his soul, and their tips pay for his numerous trips to various sporting events.
Beerguyrob

NFL News:

  • Mike McCarthy, seen right with the only reason he’s still employed, has dismissed all veterans with 6+ years of NFL experience from mandatory minicamp this week.
    • the logic is that, under Jon Gruden’s favourite provisions of the CBA, actual coaching time with players is at a premium, so why waste time with vets who do know better.
  • Jeremy Maclin has signed a ELITE two-year deal with the Ravens.
  • The Broncos had a social media session for all their returning players, to avoid both innocent dust-ups and Antonio Brown-esque problems.
    • Topic 1: don’t guess who is the QB
    • Topic 2: don’t complain about the QB
  • The latest Crimebeat! subject will be Lorenzo Maudlin, Jets running back & alleged nightclub punching enthusiast.
    • He says he didn’t do it, and has proof. All the other guy has is an account of who he thinks beat-in his face.

  • The Patriots’ Super Bowl ring contains 283 diamonds, because fuck them.
    • And who better to let you know that fact than brand-whore Darren Rovell?

Finally, Eddie Lacy made his weight again today, and thus collected another $55000 in contract incentives.

  • ESPN has you covered with a delightful array of Kooky Clauses & Crazy Incentives.

In case you missed it, or didn’t see it because you are American, “Hockey Night In Canada” does the best playoff-end montage in sports.

It’s made extra-special via the appearance of Leafs’ sadness.

I’m assuming WCS is still drunkenly stumbling the streets of Pittsburgh eating raw catfish with his fellow fans.


Tonight’s sports: ooh Lordy, it’s a small order nationally

  • NBA:
    • Game 5: Cavaliers at Warriors – 9:00PM | ABC / Sportsnet
  • WWE:
    • Monday Night Raw – 8:00PM | USA / Sportsnet360
  • International Rugby:
    • British/Irish Lions vs. Highlanders – Tuesday 3:35AM | TSN2

Pretty soon, it’ll just be baseball. HURRY UP, HALL OF FAME GAME!

Beerguyrob
Beerguyrob
A Canadian man-child of indeterminate age, he stays young by selling alcohol at sporting events and yelling at the patrons he serves. Their rage nourishes his soul, and their tips pay for his numerous trips to various sporting events.

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UnsurprisedRomonobylSonOfSpamlitre_colaFronkenshteen Recent comment authors
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Unsurprised
Unsurprised
litre_cola

Real proud of the curling pics tonight. The best HOWEVAH are the nerdy milfs.

Unsurprised
Unsurprised

Oh, she’s Kornelia Adamek. A Polish dancer.

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Fronkenshteen

Ah. So, she’s performing the national dance move; “Submarine With Screen Doors”, then?

Romonobyl

If I tried that, my ass crack would propagate to my shoulder blades.

Romonobyl

Right now in Boston, some dude is wondering how she can do that without a glass coffee table.

Romonobyl

So now we know how many Polish dancers it takes to create a raging boner.

– And thus I complete the comedy rule of three.

Romonobyl

Or I coulda just said “the hell with the light bulb, I’d rather…”, but I’m tired, obviously.

Unsurprised
Unsurprised

Nice

Fronkenshteen

HOT! “The Soft Parade” is the best Doors album. The title track is HANDS DOWN the best Doors song. COME AT ME, BRO!!

SonOfSpam

Nope. First self-titled album is best. But still…HAWT.

WCS

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=I2pP75KQBCo&ab_channel=DiscoBar80

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=aztfVs1epYY&ab_channel=hallandoatesVEVO

Gonna see both of these power duos on Tuesday. We’re all going to celebrate another Stanley Cup. Next round on me, people. Cheers!

WCS

…and neither worked. Dammit.

WCS

Unsurprised
Unsurprised

Those did.

Unsurprised
Unsurprised

She seems friendly.
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Romonobyl

That could be…useful.

Moose -The End Is Well Nigh
Moose -The End Is Well Nigh
WCS

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Jesus…

Moose -The End Is Well Nigh
Moose -The End Is Well Nigh
Unsurprised
Unsurprised

Perfectly fitting for a bunch of sycophantic lickspittles to publicly and on the record kiss his ass.

Unsurprised
Unsurprised

This would make a great porn title.
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Marc Trestmans Windowless Van
Marc Trestmans Windowless Van

Starring Octomom?

Unsurprised
Unsurprised

I was thinking lesbian orgy, but that also works.

Alternatively, I just saw this album title on reddit, “Belgian track sprinter and bodybuilder Sarah De Herdt’s live bondage show [xpost /r/SexShows].” So the other idea I was entertaining was just your run of the mill train.

Unsurprised
Unsurprised

She’s a cute Belgian. Marisa Papen is a cute Belgian. Then I think of a roommate in Spain who was Belgian with big tits, and I met a few others with big tits. So what I’m saying is that I want to visit Belgium.

Romonobyl

Sounds like you’re

/wait for it…

waffling on your decision.

Romonobyl

Wasn’t Run of the Mill Train a John Wayne movie from 1972?

Unsurprised
Unsurprised

Sounds more like a Kacey Kox vehicle.

Not to be confused with Run of the Milf Train, starring … no one, I guess. I found one with Nataly Brown, who I think is English. Oh well.

Unsurprised
Unsurprised

Gah! I keep seeing that photo when I reload the page and I still really want garden shears.

Brocky

ah, nothing quite like a good old fashioned site slow down because moose posted a shit ton of gifs

Moose -The End Is Well Nigh
Moose -The End Is Well Nigh

Sorry, I’ll quit. Even though that is what the page turns alleviate, and my feed is fine.

Marc Trestmans Windowless Van
Marc Trestmans Windowless Van

I am getting the slowdown too, but I say just keep doing what you are doing anyways

BrettFavresColonoscopy

My whole internets are slow right now, no matter the site. Obviously it’s Lebron’s fault.

Moose -The End Is Well Nigh
Moose -The End Is Well Nigh

Is Lebron posting gifs?

Unsurprised
Unsurprised

He’s got nothing but time.

Moose -The End Is Well Nigh
Moose -The End Is Well Nigh

For this site to load pages?

Unsurprised
Unsurprised

For everything

theeWeeBabySeamus

How many gifs are in a shit ton?

Unsurprised
Unsurprised

2,000 pound-offs worth
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theeWeeBabySeamus

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Moose -The End Is Well Nigh
Moose -The End Is Well Nigh

A metric tonne of wanking motions?

Unsurprised
Unsurprised

2,000 lefthanded strokes

Moose -The End Is Well Nigh
Moose -The End Is Well Nigh

FEELS LIKE SOMEONE ELSE’S WANKING MOTION….

Romonobyl

Ah yes, I remember my first AOL account too.

Moose -The End Is Well Nigh
Moose -The End Is Well Nigh
Unsurprised
Unsurprised
Croooow
Croooow

I miss the Supersonics. One of my favorite teams growing up.

Unsurprised
Unsurprised

It’s hard not to hate a state whose mascot is literally a goddamn thief (See “Sooner”), but when they go ahead and steal an entire team like they did, it’s time to pray for an asteroid to smite Oklahoma from the Earth.

Moose -The End Is Well Nigh
Moose -The End Is Well Nigh

http://www.gifbin.com/bin/112011/reverse-1321383309_surfing_goat.gif

tWBS doesn’t like sheep; well, at least we know what side of the electric fence he’s on.

Moose -The End Is Well Nigh
Moose -The End Is Well Nigh