The day has come and gone now here comes the night. And the fixture in front of us? It doesn’t look very pretty. There’s no dressing up this turdganza in any way whatsoever. [shrugs] TO THE GAME!
GB/Pit: Oh Randy, is there any Case Keenum in you at all? It would appear that there is not. Randy is currently ranked 34th in qb ratings-he’s greatly aided by his 2 TD’s/7 INT’s stat line. But wait! The pile of crap gets higher with the news that rb’s Montgomery and Jones are a bit beat up. On t’udder side of the equation the Steelers probably played their best game of the year last week in laying waste to the Titans 40-17. Rb Bell leads the league in rushing and wr Brown sits at the one spot in receiving yards. The Pittsburgh D only surrenders 16.5 points a game and under Hundley the Pack has manged a mere 13 and change. So yeah, it’s the Pittsburgh Chainsaws versus the Green Bay Week-Old Puppies in a showdown that might be in doubt for the first three minutes or so but that’s about it. But I know you’ll still wander into the fray down below because of the assorted dick joke shenanigans, silly gifs and sexy pics, earthy cynicism and general frivolity. It’s what we do and we’re very proud that we do it so very well. So grab your commenting fedora, your pyjamas, your ice-cold beverage and that snarky sense of humour I enjoy so much and have at it.
It’s all yours.
So Ed Hoculi needs glasses to watch replays, but is A-OK seeing the game in realtime
Turnover yes.
TD, no.
/what the shit.
Yep, Rodgers’ hand is on his ass.
(The jokes kinda write themselves here.)
She seems nice.
She likes quiet nights home reading blogs and eating delivery sushi.
Pffft, this game
Looks like I picked the wrong week to give up on GB defense.
Fuck.
Ummm…what?
Go Team Rodgers
I like how it took me that long to realize I posted a joke on the afternoon thread. Way to go, me!
Damn, I sat Randal Cobb because duh
I should just call in sick for the next two weeks,
I think I’m calling in sick tomorrow. It’s Wingman Day at the agency, and I don’t feel like participating in all that shit.
What’s Wingman Day?
It’s an Air Force team-building thing; workshops on suicide prevention and sexual assault and such. It’s mostly for the young airmen, but they force the civilians to attend as well. I’m not suicidal, and at my age I have to take a Viagra just to beat off and am not interested in sexually assaulting anyone (I prefer ’em willing), so it’s a day of boredom.
You could take a list of our compiled questions and report back with the answers. I’ll start: will I get in trouble if I ask Sally at reception if she wants to “arm my sidewinder”?
I work for the AF Civil Engineer; engineering types don’t know shit about weapons. But it’s an interesting idea.
Brav-fucking-o
What the shit was that?
/no srsly, it’s been awhile.
I am way too sober for this. Being back on day shift means less drinky-drink, just can’t recover like I could in mah younger days. Oh well, I’ll appreciate my moderation in the morning.
You will also have a little voice of shame, telling you how old and lame you are, in the morning.
True, but that little voice won’t hold my forehead as I puke in the toilet.
Actually, I haven’t gotten puke-drunk an ages, theory still holds. And that voice ain’t little, it screams no mercy.
So last night I saw Bob Downe perform, very enjoyable, campy, funny stuff. If you’re a fan of gay Australian humor, be sure to check out on YouTube.
Grey Cup is being played in Ottawa, eh?
So, structurally, the Coliseum actually felt a lot like Qualcomm to me. I guess the NFL has something against old concrete monolith type stadiums? Don’t know why, they’re pretty damn good for game watching
Wouldn’t you rather live in brand new house, with an infinity pool, and all the latest gewgaws AND have your pay for it.
If I had an infinity pool, I’d fart in it.
PRAISE SHA’NKLOR
Behave yourself Mr. Franken
Everyone seems to blame Aaron Rodgers’ absence for the Packers’ suckitude. But he doesn’t play defense, and this GB defense seems to suck pretty badly.
Dom Capers, baby.
Yes, but he could COMPENSATE for the defensive suck
He does know all about compensating.
That’s been our not secret for two decades. GM SlingBlade can’t pick defense, won’t sign free agents. Capers…well…you see it.
For the ladies, Rodgers and 1 out of 10 DFOers
Appreciate the fair play!
Ju Ju
Ha Ha
Ju Ju
Ha Ha
…
😀 😀 😀 😀 😀 😀 😀
That you, Mr. Letterman?
Who’s making toast?
Oprah Uma!
jew jew
HYPHENS
I miss JuJu
(yes, I just wanted to say JuJu)
If JuJu or Ha-Ha have a sister, the other could marry the sister and then JuJu and Ha-Ha would be brothers in law!
The existence of Ha-Ha Clinton-Dix is the best thing about this game
The only jersey in our house. Cuz funny.
I wish my parents would have had the same sense of humor.
No I don’t…
While I disagree, I understand your point.
Shania Twain is 52 and can still GET IT. Also, Lady Maestro has said she’s 150% on board with me becoming Shania’s baby daddy if it means we get hella cash out of it. This is how I know I can’t ever let her get away.
Also, the grandstands were literally shaking from people dancing. I kid you not.
And the weight of snow. Ppl forget
Your reminder, once again, that in a KSK comment I proved beyond a doubt Schiano is worse than Vladimir Putin.
Robert Mueller is drafting your subpoena as we speak
Boo Merill Hoge Boo
Don’t boo him. He thinks he’s giving a lecture at Villanova right now.
I want candy
He is all of us.
I hate both teams, go Bell!
You don’t say…huh. Learn something new.
I don’t understand how Carrie Underwood can be halfway through the intro song before someone hands her a microphone.
Also the microphone doesn’t change the volume or production values of the song in any way
She seems nice.
deffo a reader/thinker, too
This has been a HELLA (yes, I am reviving my middle school/high school vocab, since this is apparently supposed to be a NoCal thing? And it annoys Balls) good holiday weekend. I’m in fine fettle to enjoy, or at least tolerate this here matchup!
The Deadspin story on the Schiano hiring actually has people *defending* Schiano.
THE SCHIANO MEN ARE OUT IN FORCE, BABY
A friend of mine is a huge Tennessee fan and I should find his number to see how many blood vessels he’s burst today.
If he doesn’t answer that should give you an idea that it was too many.
Schiano men are looking for babies?! HAVE THEY NOT LEARNED?!
/may have reading problem
Really holding out hope for Manning
Carrie Underwood sucks.
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=x1P4afL00kQ
this guy/entity gets it
Fine by me if she does.
As long as she doesn’t sing.
I hope none of you were watching 60 Minutes just now, it would have made you lose whatever faith you might still have in humanity.
Time for the footing of the ball…
The girl on the left has a good bartender smile.
Schiano Man is unhired.
LOLunteers
I guess they won’t be crashing Georgia’s victory formations.
https://twitter.com/gregauman/status/388732076792741888
HUZZAH and LMFAO. Now please hire away NC State’s doofus
Sunday Gravy? Who needs it!
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=g9if8gOb4rQ
I would never buy anything edible from a dollar store.
Begs the question, is there anything really edible available at a dollar store?
Not as far as I’m concerned.
Quotes from the video:
“They get a little better with every bite.”
“Not the worst ravioli you’re ever gonna eat.”
“6/10”
Good Lord…
Shania Twain is a country music artist? This sounds like disco.
It’s Canada. They couldn’t get Rush or April Wine or Triumph or Bryan Adams?
Even Robin Sparkles, ppl forget that.
I gotta believe Nickelback was available.
Back home. Stillers, WVU hoops in the Invigaron Classic championship game, gin, bourbon, beer, and you cheesedicks.
You were doing good until the end there.
What is, “things my wife says after sex”? I’ll take world history for $1200.
If this Canadian halftime show got any more Canadian they’d have to wear sombreros.
The Grey Cup looks like it’s being played in someone’s backyard.
These untuck it commercials are a lot less interesting than I was expecting
grlknvtahkvoipolikjh
My favorite part is when he swallows it.
We have fedoras!?
I does! Why I have no idea.
I don’t think this Trump guy has the average American’s best interest at heart.
The guy who’s delivering footballs to and from the sidelines here at the Grey Cup is somehow wearing shorts in all this snow, which means he is A) a eunuch, or B) actively trying to become one.
Grey Cup winner plays Alabama?
A Rodgers wants that guys number from the image post
WOO!!! I have officially climbed out of my deep GAMBLOR hole. If any one of my three pre-placed conference title bets come in (Miami +7, Okie -4.5, Aubie pick ’em) then I am back over my $2K stake.
As a sane human being who buys a lottery ticket every 6 months or so, I can’t imagine the sort of anxiety you feel watching sports.
no way, man lotto is FOAR suckers. 😀
Just for that you get a shoulder!
and a fine one too!
Well did.
She seems nice.