Your “I’ll Take The Special” Sunday Afternoon NFL Football Open Thread

There’s a couple of beaut’s featured at this spot. Let’s quit jabbering and dive right in, shall we?

NYJ/Den: No this ain’t one of them. Well, unless you like misery in handy, dandy football form. Denver hadn’t lost eight in a row going all the way back to the Summer of Love. (that’s 1967, btw smgdh) A great number of horsies have gone to the glue factory in the sky since then. Asked about Siemian’s nine(!) interceptions over that span, coach Joseph has remarked, “He’s got to play better”. He then wiped his hands, turned around and then fell down the stairs. Well done, coach. Well. Done.

Ten/Ari: No, not this one either. The Titans 8-4 record gives them the #3 seed in the AFC conference as of today. They shouldn’t have any problems on the road playing against a Cards team that is playing backups-and in some positions backups to the backups-everywhere. Take a gander at the rb spot in particular-the fifth and sixth stringers should be getting some action today.

Was/LAC: Getting warmer… Qb Cousins figures that because there’s still a 1% chance that the Dacteds can make the playoffs, “There’s still something to play for”. The LawnClippers at 6-6 have a more straightforward plan to get to the postseason. It’s simply a matter of winning out the regular season (they have the Chiefs and the Raiders ahead of them in the sked) and the AFC West is theirs. Easy-peasy! Well back up the bus Shorty, ’cause that Washington team has some impressive wins out west against the Seahawks and the Rams. Are we looking at the dictionary definition of a trap game?

Phi/LAR: Here you go! This game is being tossed around as “The Battle of the Two Top Picks of the 2016 Draft”. Wordy. Wr Woods is out yet again so look for Goff to send some shots far downfield to wr Watkins. Te Ertz is in. No wait, he’s out. Hold on, he’s in. Nope. Out. Okay, that’s done with finally. I guess he’s occupying the middle ground between ‘clearing concussion protocol’ and ‘not having his head on straight just yet’. Odd place to be.

Sea/Jax: Well, looky here! Another one! Speaking of a fella that’s put a team on his shoulders, qb Wilson sure does fit the bill. By means of his legs and his arm he’s accounted for 82%of the Seahawks yardage on O. Another stunner-of the 30 TD’s the offense has scored, he’s had a hand in all but one. He’s up against a Jax D that has allowed 10 scores through the air and has grabbed 16(!) picks. A bum ankle has led to a drop-off in production for rb Fournette recently. If he’s not at able to get going that means that qb Bortles will have to be more than a game manager and no one wants to see that.

[Wipes hands on shirt] I’m done. Let’s get started.

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Doktor Zymm
Member

So…what, 25 minutes till more football? Boooo! Boooo I say!

Petronel
Member
Petronel

OK, desperation laterals and a fatguydown. That was awesome.

Doktor Zymm
Member

First division title since 2013…so? Is that a lot? Not really

Viva La Tabula Raza
Member
Viva La Tabula Raza

Nice hook and ladder there, Rams.

King Hippo
Member

That was nice for the home crowd!

Redshirt
Member

Oh, somewhere in this favored land the sun is shining bright;
the band is playing somewhere, and somewhere hearts are light,
and somewhere men are laughing, and somewhere children shout;
but there is no joy in the DFO Clubhouse — the mighty Rams didn’t RRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRAMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMIT!

Redshirt
Member

If the Rams pull this off, I’m all in.

Spur
Member
Spur

HOLY CRAP. Is everyone on meth in Jax?

https://twitter.com/xmasape/status/940020558879698945

Doktor Zymm
Member

Duh?

Redshirt
Member

Yes, but that throw was some something entirely not meth related.

Spur
Member
Spur

Pyrrhic victory for Philly

Spur
Member
Spur

that is game.

litre_cola
Member

Hippo, Greg the leg is going to fuk me here eh?

Doktor Zymm
Member

‘The leg’ doesn’t refer to his kicking ability if you know what I mean, wink wink, nudge nudge

litre_cola
Member

Oh Zymm, you are so Cali now…

LemonJello
Member
LemonJello

Say no more.
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Spur
Member
Spur

Can i get one more RAAAAAMMMMMMMMMIIITTTTTTTT???

litre_cola
Member

No.

Doktor Zymm
Member

Cmon Goffo!

Spur
Member
Spur

Seattle showing its class.

Petronel
Member
Petronel

Nice side suplex there.

Redshirt
Member

After the Eagles took the lead-changing points, Folesception is almost certainly incoming…

litre_cola
Member

DID NO ONE READ MY WORDS?!!!!!!11

LemonJello
Member
LemonJello

Does Foles hear Yakety Sax or Entry of the Gladiators in his head when he’s scrambling?

Redshirt
Member

I’m think Tetris theme when the lines are near the top

Doktor Zymm
Member

He Foles down after Wentz kablooie

Inanimate Carbon Rod Marinelli
Member

I’m also deeply annoyed the Packers didn’t eat shit to the Browns today.

King Hippo
Member

#ThePauls gonna Paul

Shogun Marcus
Member

Wasn’t for lack of trying!

King Hippo
Member

Baldwin needed the 1st down, not getting out of bounds. Moe-ron.

Spur
Member
Spur

Foles will fuck this up – pick 6 style

litre_cola
Member

Just woke up baby. Dont care.

Viva La Tabula Raza
Member
Viva La Tabula Raza

Jags and Rams both going to snatch defeat from jaws of victory?

Spur
Member
Spur

Goff you fukcing fuck!

LemonJello
Member
LemonJello

They called the penalty, they’re not going to change their mind, so quit walking around acting like you’re shocked and dismayed by the call.

Redshirt
Member

If anything, use puppy dog eyes or guilt. That’s more effective that “YOU’RE FUCKING IDIOTS! CHANGE THE CALL, ASSHOLES!”

Spur
Member
Spur

what a fucking leap!

rockingdog
Member
rockingdog

I always chuckle when they show those in slow mo cause I know I cant do that…..
Its pretty cool

Doktor Zymm
Member

Didn’t see the game, but after las week the Dacteds just gave up, right?

Shogun Marcus
Member

Kinda looks like that. Let the “WILL THEY SIGN HIM?!” choirs sing loudly!

Spur
Member
Spur

Good for the Jags. i hope they make the playoffs.

Spur
Member
Spur

did i just jinx them?

rockingdog
Member
rockingdog

Nooooooooooooooooooooo!!!!!!!!

Damit Jags D

King Hippo
Member

42-40 also works, in case RRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRAM IT!!! wants to push another across.

blaxabbath
Member

I bought a smoker today because I am considering smoking a bird for xmas. I bought a turkey breast today and some drumsticks so I can try this baby out tomorrow. I watched some youtube videos and it seems pretty simple but anyone have any veteran tips?

laserguru
Member

Brine the turkey first. It adds moisture and flavor and speeds up the cooking process.

blaxabbath
Member

I will do that!

Spur
Member
Spur

incoming Foles pick 6

King Hippo
Member

35-34 would be a final that RRRRRRRRRRRRRRRAMs IT!!! and covers the spread. Just sayin, Iggles.

Redshirt
Member

CBS Sports has a nice theory as to why the Bengals laid an egg today.

“The Bengals played so badly on Sunday that it almost looked like they were trying to get Marvin Lewis fired.”

blaxabbath
Member

Yeah — that’ll happen.

Redshirt
Member

Yeah, Lewis will quit before he is fired. Brown is comfortable with Lewis.

blaxabbath
Member

Lewis knows Mike Brown killed that cheerleader.

Redshirt
Member

Nah. If that’s the case, the city would’ve gotten in on that blackmail and would’ve renegotiated the Stadium Deal for something fair.

Spur
Member
Spur

Bortles did good?

theeWeeBabySeamus
Member

OK, time for fud. I’ll need energy to whine about Flacco later.
See yas then.

Inanimate Carbon Rod Marinelli
Member

So… the Bears… are good?

King Hippo
Member

Bears are Bears. Uniquely fucking mysterious.

Inanimate Carbon Rod Marinelli
Member

I think they’ll finish the season with the highest strength of victory of all teams, something that’ll look even more bizarre when they lose out.

Doktor Zymm
Member

Oh no honey, they are some adjectives, but not that one

Redshirt
Member

Once again. They played the Bengals. A checked-out, running out the string, already has vacation plans made after Week 17 Bengals.

Inanimate Carbon Rod Marinelli
Member

Oh, I know. I’m just amazed at how much they’ve checked out.

But the meatball-ier Bears fans will be gloating “Trubinsky” tomorrow and I can’t help but mock them.

Redshirt
Member

Me too. I’ve seen the Bengals outmatched, outcoached, over their heads, completely unlucky and out of their minds. This is the first I’ve seen them checked out.

The Maestro
Member

Just slept from 4:30 to now. Time to keep drinkin’.

Inanimate Carbon Rod Marinelli
Member

I also napped today and feel pretty refreshed now.

LemonJello
Member
LemonJello

You know it’s still Sunday, right?

LemonJello
Member
LemonJello

Has the phrase “consulting with Dr. James Andrews” been used regarding Wentz?

rockingdog
Member
rockingdog

A show where kids constantly change the thermostat called Breaking Dad.

King Hippo
Member

The winner of this game is really Minny

Redshirt
Member

So Wentz’s knee went blewie?

theeWeeBabySeamus
Member

So, if Kenyan Drake blows out an ACL tonight while getting coffee at Starbucks, and Tawwmmy throws for about 6 or 7 TDs tomorrow….

So you’re telling me there’s a chance?

Spur
Member
Spur

live look in at the Philly bandwagon
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rockingdog
Member
rockingdog

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Redshirt
Member

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King Hippo
Member

walking it off, ruled completely out already…thinking ACL is blown

Redshirt
Member

Not sure. He’s walking pretty good for a complete tear. That knee would be completely unstable for a natural walking gait. Partial tear maybe.

King Hippo
Member

Sometimes dudes with blown ACLs walk off like nothing happened. I can’t splain why.

But they also have a quick diagnostic for same that’s like 90% effective that would explain the grim sideline atmosphere,

Redshirt
Member

Wow. I would think an unstable knee would completely affect how someone walks. Huh.

laserguru
Member

It’s not uncommon after a serious knee injury to walk it off. Shock sets in pretty quickly and denial is at the mind’s forefront.

Redshirt
Member

Well yeah, but shock does give way to structure. When my dad broke his ankle/leg, he didn’t feel any pain, but that doesn’t mean he walked to the car (despite him crawling/dragging his internally severed foot saying “Help me to car”).

laserguru
Member

An ACL injury is a little different because it’s more related to the stability to the back of the knee. If it’s an LCL injury it affects more of the lateral movement. I broke an ankle before and that pain was immediate and intense.

Petronel
Member
Petronel

Erin, nice try, but we’re NOT letting you redesign the ref uniforms any time soon.

Moose -The End Is Well Nigh
Member
Moose -The End Is Well Nigh

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Doktor Zymm
Member

I’m gonna go to random games and hoild up signs saying ‘who dere’ or ‘who dis’ or ‘who dem’

litre_cola
Member

Who dey would like a word.

Dunstan
Member
Dunstan

Browns fans should adopt “Why dis”

Spur
Member
Spur

why us

theeWeeBabySeamus
Member

RRRRRAAAMMMMIIITTTTTTT FOR REALSIES THIS TIME!!!!!

King Hippo
Member

c’mon, SeaTruthers, 2 TDs gets me a PUSH!

King Hippo
Member

one down!

Moose -The End Is Well Nigh
Member
Moose -The End Is Well Nigh

BOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO

Dunstan
Member
Dunstan

That’s what THEY want you to believe

Spur
Member
Spur

Foles ready for RAMMMMMMMMIIIIITTTTTTTT?