NFL News:
- Chuck Knox died on Sunday, aged 86. In his time, he coached the Bills, Seahawks, and Rams (twice).
- This one matters to me, because he was the first Seahawks coach I remember.
- “Ground Chuck” was a great nickname, from an era of many.
- According to Peter King, Knox coached 22 NFL seasons, and his 186 regular-season wins are 10th all-time in the 98-season history of the NFL.
- His career record was 186-147.
- This one matters to me, because he was the first Seahawks coach I remember.
- DeAngelo Hall retired today after 14 seasons.
- He had a pretty honest accounting of his career:
“Average,” Hall said of his career. “Not great; on pace to be really good until four years ago. I had a vision of a gold jacket. The injuries the last couple years have been very hard on me, so that’s out of the question. Who’s to say I can’t get in there another way. That’s my focus. I still want a gold jacket, whether I get one as an exec, a coach. I’m going to get me a damn gold jacket. Believe that.”
- Ooh – circle your calendars:
- Greg Hardy’s professional MMA debut will come against another former NFL player. Hardy will face former defensive end Austen Lane on June 12 in a heavyweight bout on the Dana White Tuesday Night Contender Series, it was announced during the UFC 224 broadcast.
- Lane has been out of football since 2014, Hardy since 2015.
- Matt Millen, who played with – as Peter King called it – “intelligent abandon” for the Raiders, and whom intelligence abandoned when he was Lions GM (© Beerguyrob), is battling amyloidosis and may need a heart transplant.
- In the article, PK gets very nuggety: “How football history could have changed if you picked DeMarcus Ware instead of Mike Williams,” I said.
- “How ’bout that?” Millen said. “Maybe we would have ruined him too.”
- Amyloidosis is a rare disease that attacks the bodies organs and often evades diagnosis because it mimics other diseases.
- It requires chemotherapy to manage the symptoms, but is not a cure.
- So, it’s the lupus of rare diseases?
- It requires chemotherapy to manage the symptoms, but is not a cure.
- In the article, PK gets very nuggety: “How football history could have changed if you picked DeMarcus Ware instead of Mike Williams,” I said.
————————————————————————————–
Finally, a malevolent deity,
must be dancing quite hard today, as the US Supreme Court took time out from ignoring gun laws to overturn a George HW Bush era online gaming law regarding sports betting. The 1992 Professional and Amateur Sports Protection Act essentially mandated Nevada as the only jurisdiction that could allow single-event gambling.
- In a 6-3 vote, the court, through Justice Alito’s response, ruled that “(t)he legalization of sports gambling requires an important policy choice, but the choice is not ours to make. Congress can regulate sports gambling directly, but if it elects not to do so, each state is free to act on its own. Our job is to interpret the law Congress has enacted and decide whether it is consistent with the Constitution. PASPA is not.”
- The court’s decision came in a case from New Jersey, which has fought for years to legalize gambling on sports at casinos and racetracks in the state.
Florio guesstimates that 6-10 states could have legal betting set up by the time the NFL kicks off Week 1, while also noting that the NFL & the other three major sports leagues will begin lobbying Congress to enact national legislation.
New Jersey plans to be first. Delaware, Mississippi, New York, Pennsylvania and West Virginia are among the states expected to quickly get into the legal bookmaking game, and 32 states are expected to have some form up & running within 5 years. A record $4.8 billion was wagered at Nevada sportsbooks in 2017, and the American Gaming Association estimates that Americans illegally wager about $150 billion on sports each year. No word on Hippo’s contributions to that tally.
Tonight’s sports:
- NHL:
- Vegas at Winnipeg – 8:00PM | NBCSN / CBC
- NBA:
- Warriors at Rockets – 9:00PM | TNT / Sportsnet1
- MLB:
- Rays at Royals – 7:00PM | ESPN / TSN
- WWE:
- Monday Night Raw – 8:00PM | USA / Sportsnet360
- from London, so tape-delayed from earlier today.
- Monday Night Raw – 8:00PM | USA / Sportsnet360
Inanimate Carbon Rod Marinelli had the hockey comment of the weekend:
Man, with the Capitals playing this way this year might be truly special: the year the Caps eat shit to an expansion team.
With great respect, I’d like to lobby for the Jets to win over the Caps. It’d be Gary Bettman’s greatest failure triumphing over John Ziegler’s. A CROMULENT STORM!
Fuck.
Klay needs his own team.
The Klu Klux Klay?
“The Trump Organization is involved in a project in Indonesia building hotels, golf courses, residences — it is getting up to $500 million in backing from the Chinese government,” Noah Bierman of the Los Angeles Times said during Monday’s press briefing. “Can you explain the administration’s position on A, how this doesn’t violate the emoluments clause; and B, how this wouldn’t violate the president’s own promise that his private organization would not be getting involved in new foreign deals while he was president?”
Shah didn’t even attempt to answer Bierman’s question. “I’ll have to refer you to the Trump Organization,” he said.
Bierman pushed back, pointing out to Shah that “the Trump Organization can’t speak on behalf of the president as the president — the head of the federal government, the one who is responsible, who needs to assure the American people, and they don’t have that responsibility.”
But Shah wouldn’t budge. “You’re asking about a private organization’s dealings that may have to do with a foreign government. It’s not something I can speak to,” he said, before calling on another reporter.
https://thinkprogress.org/white-house-chinese-financing-trump-project-violate-constitution-76456a21225a/
They have pretty much the same deals going in India, more real estate swindle-ie though.
It all seems totes legit tho.
KNIGHTS!
That Supreme Court decision weighed whether Congress ordering state legislation is the same as it prohibiting a repeal of state law. And they say pedantry’s boring.
Deleted stupid phone.
.
Holy shit there’s a gas station chain earnestly called “Pump and Munch.”
I was very familiar with the Kum & Go but I could not grasp any other gas station chain would dare impede on Kum & Go’s obviousness.
I’d like to see one on each corner.
Kum and Go, Jizz and Jet, Ejaculate and Evacuate
So many possibilities!
They all charge a lot more for high octane and doughnuts…… glazed doughnuts.
AKA Blumpken’s
found a funny:
If I read another crazy theory about how advertising is brainwashing us I swear I’ll drive a new, fully redesigned Ford F-150 off a cliff
Oh man, this is too good.
https://deadspin.com/the-israeli-soccer-team-renamed-after-donald-trump-has-1826019259
Honestly, we need in this in the U.S. Pick one team to be the designated racist team and let them be as racist as they want. Everyone gets a team they can hate–we all need heels to root against–and we get an easy way to identify every awful bigot without needing one of those dumb red hats.
Fuck them. Fuck Israel.
We already have the P*ts
Dammit. Too fast for me.
That’s what sh……………
But we need to make it official and overt. None of this subtlety shit.
I understand what Israel is, but even that level of overt racism took me by surprise.
Is quoting the Ayatollah a thing now?
Which one?
You got me; I wouldn’t know. The antisemitism kinda blurs all ayatollahs no offnce
Anti-Israel is not necessarily antisemitism. Israel, the IDF would be called terrorist organizations if not for the history.
Terrorism is cool if a Zionist does it.
My take: Israel won the land on the battlefield. The colonial oppression in Palestine is heinous. Not all Israeli citizens are complicit in the slaughter—many are victims, if we use citizenship as the frame of reference.
And while “fuck Israel” is not per se antisemitism, it’s too hateful a needle to thread, IMHO.
Most citizens benefit from the aggression and the stealing of land; at this point “winning land on the battlefield” is just killing or arresting Palestinian civilians and taking their land to put settlements on. They get a free ride in doing so and are supported unquestionable by the US. Over the past 30 years they are one of the top receivers of military and foreign aid from the US. The wars they did win were assured by US backing and they knew it. We have armed them with nuclear weapons, then wonder why their neighbors are nervous. Half of this country buy in to the biblical justification of all this so I don’t expect to make sense or be ethical or moral any time soon.
We already have Boston for all sports, and to spread the love a bit geographically we’ve got the Redacteds, the dirt Falcons, pro-Big Love (is that the Jazz name here?), and I’ll leave it to our friends from Canadia to pick the ice footbawl team.
Damn. That cuts deep.
Yuo make sum exellent points and I wood like to subscrib to you’re newsletter.
harden hurt his vag
switched over the Golden Knights game. I though Canadians LOVED hockey? it’s so quiet in that arena.
Politeness takes many forms, my friend.
*goal horn blares*
*audience claps politely*
Eh?
is whisky good for a cold?
Alcohol kills bacteria.
Whisky is good for everything.
Well, it’s not bad for a cold.
Houston playing too slow. Speed it up
oh shit. hahaha E-40 has a courtside seat at this game 1 western conference finals.
Go warriors!
In typical “I’m trying to do good but bad is so damn delicious” mode, I’m eating cottage cheese and dill pickle chips.
Philistine. I prefer pineapple with my cottage cheese.
Are you pregnant?
Did I mention that I was eating pickles? No, I did not. You know I love pickles when I’m with child. ARE YOU CHEATING ON ME AGAIN? [points to chin] I’VE HAD IT UP TO HERE WITH YOU, BALLS!
Always with the balls on your chin
cottage cheese and cucumbers aka Utah Nachos
Life’s not too bad. At least I’m not this sad fucker.
Anyway, I forgot that PFT Commenter was good.
https://www.barstoolsports.com/chicago/mmbm-i-started-to-roast-tampa-bay-but-after-game-two-it-seemed-too-mean-so-i-roasted-washington-dc-instead-to-be-polite/?_referrer=twitter&_branch_match_id=524633856743340791/
WRONG!
We install those dictators and allow them to live in the U.S. in exile after they are deposed. Dan Snyder is exactly where he needs and deserves to be.
Every city with an NFL franchise get the teams and owners they deserve. Snyder is the perfect man for Dallas, Snyder for D.C., Spanos and Kroenke for L.A. (fun fact, USC rescinded a blood Walton’s degree when it was revealed she paid others to do all of her work. Kroenke married into that dynasty of shit weasels, which makes him even more execrable), and so on.
I’m imagining Dan Synder a petty Latin American dictator and it ends when one of his generals shoots him in the back for demolishing a village that’s in the way of his palace’s view of the sea.
That reminds me. Back around 2001-2002, Showtime produced a biopic about Manuel Noriega directed by Oliver Stone and starring Bob Hoskins as Noriega. It was exactly what you imagine it was like, and this reminds me of the failed coup against him about halfway through the movie.
That’s a myth. Shots in the back were for being uppity to VPs of the United Fruit Company.
Anyway, I’m sure you loved watching Hillary stans tying themselves in knots defending her call to Pompeo as if it were about her being his moral compass and not swapping plans to overthrow another a banana republic.
Tune up the human skinned femur drums. Boltman is gonna be pissed.
It was sadder and more original when a Browns fan did it
Nah. Browns fans are basically a different species. I respect having the will to go out there and give them shit even though nothing is stopping that man from doing literally anything else. Suicide would be preferable to living in Cleveland and being a Browns fan, and yet that motherfucker persists in spite of reality constantly shitting down his throat, which makes his Browns fandom the ultimate Fuck You to the universe.
Point conceded.
Howdy, kids.
Hi. i have a cold. Send food.
Gotta go find it.
I sometimes forget how good the Simpsons once were at satirizing American culture.
American became The Simpsons.
-Robert Falcon Scott
Hey, you!
evening!
Kevin Durant, soft as a pillow.
Someone needs to punch Draymond in the face.
Flipped a coin. I’m rooting for Hitler, Go Rockets, encircle the cities.. DO NOT ENTER!
Ah, my Young Dumb Son is trying to convince me that the original Woodstock was held in Cali. Silly boy.
What fucked up Peanuts cartoons did he read?
Any strip featuring Spike?
Insist the original Coachella was in New York and call it a draw.
The news scroll is wrong. The U.S. is nowhere near the 21st century.
if the Rockets lose game one, get your brooms out.
i’m going with 4 nut punches in this series. CP3 has been itching to punch someone all playoffs long
Nut punches, nut kicks, everyone gets hit!
Florida traded Marchessault to Vegas (and some picks maybe?) to convince Vegas to take Reily Smith in the expo draft. Florida did not make the playoffs by the way. Both of those players are still on the Vegas roster.
L’arse Vegas isn’t rolling over onto their stomach.
They’re known as Winni-peggers for a reason.
Vegas traded a 1st, 2nd, and 3rd for Tomas Tatar at the deadline, and this is like the second game he’s played in the playoffs. (Because he’s been healthily scratched otherwise.)
I can see why they’d take a chance though. One more “r” added to his last name and he’d be a rare kind of player.
[stretches]
this Warriors vs Rockets game is like Hitler vs Stalin or NE vs Philly.
Lots of deaths, profligate expenditures of ammo, and ground taken and surrendered for no real gain?
I’m not familiar with this Hitler/Stalin thing you mentioned.
Well lookee here, the Bears are hiring some S-M-R-T people.
https://www.linkedin.com/jobs/view/677581165/
They’re gonna love it when they assign me some bullshit ticket pricing model and I come back saying the Great Algorithm predicts Trubisky will throw all the interceptions.
On a serious-ish note, that title of “Data Scientist” is pretty generous and I bet this job would be bullshit benefit someone with a regular analyst title.
That would explain the subpar responses to my radio personal ad for “Date a Scientist.”
Pictured: the Bears bleeding edge technology:
I’m genuinely curious to see the applicants they’ll get for this job since I’m sure a bunch of unqualified people will try to bullshit their way into the job. I suspect the pay will be lower than average because DA BEARS and I actually can’t imagine see this team shit all over the field every week even if it were free.
I have a nasty cold. i called in sick today and tomorrow. i hate being sick when its warm outside.
So far, I give the pace of this first period 8 out of 10 bananacakes.
Damn it – we just got our letter that we *won* ticket purchasing rights to the Raiders LV stadium.
Not sure that $35K/seat is looking so worth it now.
If the seat was located in a downtown Manhattan high rise that would be a good deal smh
Hall of Fame class 2025: DeAngelo Hall and Trent Richardson, believe that.
He didn’t say WHICH Hall of Fame!
Narcissistic Scotchy is upset that he can’t see who loves his amazing comments-can someone do something about this? If not, I may have to report everyone.
Don’t you need a thumbs up before worrying about that?
You’re just lucky I can’t help my own comment along. Otherwise I’d have 3 times (THREE TIMES!) more likes than your comment.
Snitches get stitches…
I run one of northern Ontario’s most exclusive quilting bees so bring it on, Buster.
I thought the first rule of quilting bees is “don’t talk about the quilting bee.”
I typed that in sign language, smarty pants. And now you’ve let the cat out of the bag. Get ready to have your epaulets ripped from your shoulders by the Queen Bee!
I thought I typed that in wing dings!
/flips off webcam so NSA knows I’m pissed at them
The puck bunny Stacey “The Mattress” Nattrass is singing the intro tunes. I know how she got that gig.
Hard work, merit and dedication?
Nope. It was practice, practice, practice.
DAWWWww, horsefeathers! That was third on my list…
I graduated same class as her in my high school. I shit you not. R.E 94
I see (hear) that her singing is okay. BUT…what is her yodeling game like?
She was a girl who thought that she was already a woman by wearing blouses, purses, business lady garb etc. Was the drama head, singing etc. Yes her personality matches all that, or it did in highschool
“Gotta love the old White Out!” [collects royalty cheque]
-Bette Nesmith Graham
Randy Bachman is a WinniDude. Lovely, subtle guitar work featured in this tune.
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=N4_0Pt3HAR8
found a funny:
I take off my blindfold. Before me is a gory tableau of death and destruction, bodies strewn across the landscape. The piñata is unscathed.
Folks.
Terry Jacks was born and raised in The Peg but you ain’t gonna hear Seasons in the Sun from me.
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=wvbLaeTqqcw
Nothing matters, dude. We’re all doomed.
Chantal’s version of “Leaving on a Jet Plane”. The first time I heard it I was in bumper-to-bumper traffic in Toronto and I burst out crying. Stupid emotional outburst, smgdh
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=-6A8ZmYM1r0
Chantal Kreviazuk is from Winnipeg. Her best tune as far as I’m concerned…
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=yqfd4v-_byg
“He touched more people than you can imagine.”
-Mike Babcock, (having never come across “Phrasing!”) talking about a college coach that recently passed away
Meanwhile, Justice Alito’s inbox flies open…
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=uTpxeNQfDo4
The bribes to Alito are why Hippo’s account got so low over the weekend.