JV-Only Week Two Boogaloo

King Hippo

King Hippo

Reclusive, vulgar Broncos fan.Also a proud fookin’ Evertonian.Likely dropped on my head repeatedly as a small child.[Insert George Carlin quote followed by thoughtful nod.]
King Hippo

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Sadly, our first shite International Break is upon us, so one can sleep in until noon (unless one has work to catch up on all weekend like I do, over footy but fucking still, UGH).  A full Saturday before NFL Week 1 would have been superb, but alas.  To the fixtures we go:

Mississippi State at Kansas State (Noon, ESPN)

This is quite the quality opener, especially for early September.  We don’t often see the Cowbells in a marquee OOC road contest, but kudos to them for having the balls (hee hee, Jackie Sherrill callback) to visit the ultimate trap game artists, the Unded Bill Snyders.  I mean, FFS, it’s already named the Bill Snyder Family Stadium.

Arizona at Houston (Noon, ABC/ESPN2)

Bear Down FOAR Midterms lost at home to the Stormin’ Mormons last week, now travels east (not that much) to play what would be a 9:00 am start for them, local time.  Yikes.  JV Yoooooouston’s QB’s first name is D’Eriq, which is fucking hilarious.

Duke at Northwestern (Noon, ESPNU)

Again, NEEEERRRRRRRDDDDDDDDDs!  Oh HAI there, snow!

UCLA at Oklahoma (1:00, Fox)

Supposedly, the Bruins’ home opener v. Cincy was the easiest game on their schedule.  They lost.  Westwood denizens may want to lube up.

Georgia at South Carolina (3:30 CBS)

The SEC opener is finally here, OMFG!  Does it still mean MOAR?  Like ’em or loathe ’em, they really came good in their test games Week 1 (Johnny Reb beating Guns Up!, Aubie edging Washington, and most importantly LSU walloping favoured Miami).  That showing likely ensures the perennial “SEC slot” in the playoffs, though again, all the good work came from the SEC West, and this is an SEC East/Least matchup.  So it could be a bit derpy.

Iowa State at Iowa (5:00, Fox)

These teams tend to live in the 6-6/7-5 range, but rivalry matchups tend to be fun, and this is no exception.  Plus this viewing window is more than a bit sparse.

Clemson at Texas A&M (7:00, ESPN)

TAMU is clearly in rebuild mode, but they’ve always had talent and this is probably the best shot we have at someone stopping Team Jeebus Camp (trust me, FSU ain’t doing it).  Jimbo is a moe-ron, but he is at least familiar with the Tiggers.  Who knows.

Wyoming at Missouri (7:00, ESPNU)

Come for the ugly uniforms…stay for the ugly uniforms.

Southern Cal at Stanford (8:30, Fox)

The Trees always save their best footy for the Irish and Troi Boiz, so this match is totes nap-worthy, as needed/if 3:30 window circumstances warrant.  This should also be Gus Johnson territory.  PURE!

Michigan State at Arizona State (10:45, ESPN)

Tweakers AHOY!  How good was that nap, anyway?  You get upset-primed Sparty (should have lost to Utah State last Friday), coeds, and Herm Fucking Edwards playing to win teh game!  What more could you ask for?

King Hippo
King Hippo
Reclusive, vulgar Broncos fan. Also a proud fookin' Evertonian. Likely dropped on my head repeatedly as a small child. [Insert George Carlin quote followed by thoughtful nod.]
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FronkenshteenMoose -The End Is Well NighballsofsteelandfuryKing Hippoyeah right Recent comment authors
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ballsofsteelandfury

New Thread is up!

Brick Meathook
Brick Meathook

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Fronkenshteen

It’s the same people in both gifs. Wonderful attention to detail. There’s even a guy who’s not there in the later gif. WHAT’S HIS STORY?!

Brick Meathook
Brick Meathook

Wes Anderson may be precious but he’s all about details and I love his movies.

Horatio Cornblower

As a UConn alumnus I am shocked, shocked I tell you, that a Bob Diaco defense shit the bed at the end of the game.

Horatio Cornblower

Oops, turns out Nebraska fired Diaco after last season. His coaching, much like black mold, apparently continues to linger.

Horatio Cornblower

Holy shit, Colorado.

Moose -The End Is Well Nigh
Moose -The End Is Well Nigh

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Fronkenshteen
Moose -The End Is Well Nigh
Moose -The End Is Well Nigh

Well, she does have a black box.

Fronkenshteen

Just got drunk shamed. Nawt happy.

Horatio Cornblower

6:32 EST and I’m hungover.

Golf rules.

BrettFavresColonoscopy

Finished watching the GWS-Sydney replay

Spoiler

A) Fucking awesome
B) That game was closer than the score indicated since it was tight until the third…but also was not as close as the score indicated thanks to two garbage time goals for the Swans
C) Phil Davis is a beast and made Buddy a complete non-factor
D) Toby Greene is a difference maker
E) When the Giants tackle and are physical, they’re a much better team
F) You’re a gimp

Now to toggle through the Collingwood-West Coast replay

Moose -The End Is Well Nigh
Moose -The End Is Well Nigh

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ballsofsteelandfury

Nice!

Moose -The End Is Well Nigh
Moose -The End Is Well Nigh

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Spur
Spur

No late hit??? oh right, it’s Nebraska playing at home.

Redshirt

Why is So. Illinois and Ole Miss playing an Arena Football game?

Fronkenshteen

Hey! Serena lost. Can’t wait to hear about what she did wrong instead of her congratulating her opponent for beating her.
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Spur
Spur

Fuck Nebraska!

Spur
Spur

Folks

Col. Duke LaCross

Sir.

Col. Duke LaCross

This Williams v. Osaka match has gone off the rails.

Col. Duke LaCross

Serena is getting JOBBED.

Senor Weaselo

Granted, she hasn’t played particularly well with the double faults, but yeah, that’s some bullshit.

Fronkenshteen

Bell just gave back 853K. WTF?

theeWeeBabySeamus

He don’t be liking the franchise tag.

Fronkenshteen

Less than money?

theeWeeBabySeamus

I’m not saying I agree FWIW. And maybe he’s getting advice from sources which are more interested in themselves than in him. Wouldn’t be the first time that happened to someone.

My understanding is that “his” concerns are his longterm viability given how he’s been/being used, and his longterm earning potential.

Fronkenshteen

I’m not on either side, I just thought the logical conclusion to all of this was for him to report late enough to collect a week 1 check, but not play (thereby eliminating one week of physical abuse). Then play out the season & get paid elsewhere (.500s I keep hearing). Him giving away $ confuses me. How long is he willing to sit? Hell of a bluff. He represents one hell of a percentage of Pittsburgh’s offensive touches (HARF?!?! Not you, Ben! harf…)

Brick Meathook
Brick Meathook

I’m watch the game between the University of Where-I-blew-up-a-Fiat-Spider-engine and the University of Where-I-saw-500-bare-asses-in-one-day

tomsellecksmoustache
tomsellecksmoustache

Wabash vs Liberty?

Spanky Datass
Spanky Datass

Universal Technical Institute vs. Clown College?

Fronkenshteen

Hey Mr Meathook! Where in LA is/was the Roxy Theater? Latest Zappa release is from there ’73.

Brick Meathook
Brick Meathook

The Roxy is on the Sunset Strip. It’s pretty famous. It’s owned by the guy on the left who’s eating his hand, who also directed Up In Smoke (the Battle of the Bands in that movie was filmed at the Roxy)
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Fronkenshteen

Thanks!

/ also: FATS NICHOLSON

Brick Meathook
Brick Meathook

HE’S GONE FULL BRANDO

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Fronkenshteen

The challah….the challah…
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Horatio Cornblower

I’m guessing the latter is Penn State.

Fronkenshteen

Well whuddya know? I was heading north on the channel guide towards the Philbins vs the Lettetmans when I was stopped in my tracks by a baseball game! Dirt .500s vs Dirt Pats at Fenway. Jackie Bradley Jr. is the only Boston player my cold Yankee heart has ever allowed me to absolutely love, regardless of uniform.

theeWeeBabySeamus

Woof Woof….Go Dawgs.
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Dammit!!!!!

LemonJello
LemonJello

Boomer Sooner clubbing Ursa Minor like a bunch of baby seals…guess I’ll switch over to Catholic Buggery and…Ball St ???

Man, that’s gonna be abuse that even the Pope won’t want to cover up.

Fronkenshteen

Since 1989, the Denver Broncos are 31-3 in home games in weeks 1and 2. Gamblor accordingly.

Wakezilla

I was going to suggest to check out the Ticats/Argos game, but Hamilton just put up like 17 points in a few minutes and this game is all but over.

Looks like the Boatmen are missing the playoffs.