[DOOR FLIES OPEN]

"This site goes down so often we oughta change the name to “Dating Nancy Reagan”" – Horatio

Log In

Your “She’s A Trigger, That Golden Girl” Saturday Evening Open Thread

Beerguyrob

/

Hopefully you didn’t spend the day in the same doghouse I did. Sure, I didn’t vacuum before work on Thursday, but I don’t think the police officers cared that the house wasn’t clean when they arrived. I literally

got the “clean underwear in a car accident” treatment over it. Dammit – that calls for booze.

Tonight’s sports: the NCAA gods have given us a delightful bounty

  • NCAA:
    • Alabama at Mississippi – 7:00PM | ESPN
    • Oregon State at Nevada – 7:00PM | ESPNU
    • Louisiana (Lafayette) at Mississippi State – 7:30PM | ESPN2
    • Ohio State vs. TCU – 8:00PM | ABC
      • from JerryWorld
    • Southern California at Texas – 8:00PM | FOX
    • Washington at Utah – 10:00PM | ESPN
    • Fresno State at UCLA – 10:30PM | FS1
  • MLB:
    • Twins at Royals – 7:00PM | FS1
    • Mariners at A’s – 9:00PM | Spor
  • CFL:
    • Redblacks at Roughriders – 9:30PM | TSN
  • MLS:
    • Toronto FC vs. LA Galaxy – 7:30PM | TSN
    • Whitecaps FC vs. Seattle – 10:00PM | TSN2
  • F-1
    • Singapore Grand Prix
      • 7:30AM | TSN
      • 8:05AM | ESPN

Week Two continues in earnest tomorrow morning. So many key players are listed as “questionable” they could form part of Trump’s cabinet.

 

Our chants will be “Tie Brownies Ties” and “Fail Raiders Fail”. EMBRACE THE CHAOS!

0 0 votes
Article Rating
Tags:

Leave a Reply

Subscribe
Notify of
518 Comments
Inline Feedbacks
View all comments
Wakezilla

Zlatan Ibrahimović scored a beautiful 500th career goal tonight. Check it out when you can

1
Sharkbait

Sometimes I wish I went to a bigger school that had a minor league NFL team. I can’t get into it now. I just watch for the upsets mainly. If at all.

0
ballsofsteelandfury

I understand completely.

/UCLA, class of 1992

0
theeWeeBabySeamus

comment image

2
Senor Weaselo

I have never attended a school that had a football team. Not in HS, not in undergrad, not in grad school.

Probably not my DMA.

1
ballsofsteelandfury

Even BETTER playoffs idea:

16 teams
Each conference winner gets in and is seeded based on conference winning percentage in non conference games vs FBS schools.
The rest are at large.

0
King Hippo

my 16 (the serious proposal) would skip 8 entirely, conference champs if in the Top 25 via some kind of SOS-based mathematical formula like Sagarin, the rest at large. Better seed is home the first two rounds. Would have to work hard on the formula to prevent gaming the system, but we have plenty of neeerrrrdddds who could dae it!

0
ballsofsteelandfury

That only works if you move the lesser conferences to FCS. No way all the conference champions make the Top 25 because it’s a popularity contest.

0
...

All conference champs or pound sand

1
herodotus450

I say we make it 120 teams, they play each other sort of randomly throughout the year, then the national champ is chosen by a secret enclave of rich and powerful football old white dudes.

2
King Hippo

Mine would mean Boise gets in, not like 6-5 North Texas. Trust me, that’s how you want it. And it’s Sagarin-ish Top 25, not polls.

0
...

If North Texas somehow wins their conference with 6 wins, they’re in. (That won’t happen, of course as even the winner of a weak conference probably gets 8 wins)

1
King Hippo

to me, that encourages bad conference affiliation. I don’t like it. There needs to be a threshold when only at 16. There will still be bowls.

0
...

Conference affiliation is about nothing but TV dollars and teams can not upgrade themselves at will, so this a horrible standard to judge teams on

1
King Hippo

Happy Appy has been aggressively upgrading itself. It can be done. You have to balance equity and quality. Otherwise, 3/4 of the opening round games will be liquid shit, and awful TV.

0
...

Only if you don’t stagger the bracket. Do it like the Big East did their basketball tournament when it had 16 teams and you’ll end up with more competitive games

2
King Hippo

correct, you could make it larger than 16 so the small leagues play-in for the “automatic” berths, but it will just put the Boise-type schools at an even larger disadvantage.

0
ballsofsteelandfury

If you don’t want North Texas, drop them to FCS. There is no point in being “FBS” if you can’t compete for the championship on the field.

1
King Hippo

sure you can compete on the field, have a 10 or 11-win season

0
...

The basketball side does not care which conference you are in and in the process has shown than a number of supposedly unworthy teams can hold their own from time to time.

No sports association/league in the world arbitrarily excludes whole groups of teams because they simply don’t think they’re good and college football’s problem has ALWAYS been its subjective evaluation of teams.

1
King Hippo

basketball is much less dependent on physical dominance than footy, and is a larger tourney.

Almost by definition, a conference champ that doesn’t make the cutoff is gonna be one that lost every non-conference game against a power-conference side.

0
ballsofsteelandfury

If they can’t compete, they shouldn’t be in the top division.

0
theeWeeBabySeamus

Good job, Nevada. 4-3 works a lot better, huh?

0
Moose -The End Is Well Nigh

comment image

1
theeWeeBabySeamus

Eh shit, they went back to the 3-1-4.

Still stopped ’em tho. Stupid sexy Beavers with their lack of a run game.

0
Moose -The End Is Well Nigh

comment image

1
herodotus450

Lot of shiny crap littering the field at Jerryworld. Well, aside from the defenses.

0
King Hippo

Nice “fuck yes!!” by scrawny Bloodeyes kid on teevee

0
Moose -The End Is Well Nigh

comment image

3
theeWeeBabySeamus

That kid knows what’s up. But it’s the blonde with daddy issues over to the left whom I’d like to talk to.

1
Moose -The End Is Well Nigh

“Why don’t you have a seat right over there.”

3
Gratliff

The specific issue is that he’s late picking her up from school

2
Moose -The End Is Well Nigh

OK, that made me laugh.

1
Wakezilla

Who is that even supposed to be?

0
ballsofsteelandfury

Princess Redtitties?

2
Moose -The End Is Well Nigh

Miss Not the Point of the Post.

0
Spur

When Ohio State has to play a “real” team they tend to be exposed for what they are, King of the Cupcake Eaters.

2
King Hippo

As bad as the B1G is this year, tOSU can easily absorb a loss here and still make the playoffs.

0
King Hippo

Better playoffs idea – 8 teams, 4 seeds for the SECCCCC PAWWWWWLLLL, 4 for the plebians. Seed against one another in the first round, of course, for maximum bragging rights. It just means MOAR!

0
theeWeeBabySeamus

WTF defensive set is Nevada going with here. Looks like a 3-1-4 which I don’t think is actually a thing.

0
Rikki-Tikki-Deadly

All right, time to watch some robots smash each other.

1
herodotus450

First of all, they’re Lizard People not robots, second of all I don’t think they do that anymore with each other, and third of all how did you get that footage of the Clintons?

2
Senor Weaselo

I look forward to the heat of your taek. You will know the one.

0
Buddy Cole's Halftime Show

The etymology of the Texas Christian University mascot comes from the late 1880s when biology professor Dr. Mordecai Johnson showed the students a nude female depiction and the Disciples of Christ students became so aroused he said, “they were like horny frogs, just hopping around with their tongues out’. After that comment football coach Wilton Pennypacker decided it was such an eloquent description of masculinity that after some tweaking the Texas Christian Fasters became the Horned Frogs.

5
Senor Weaselo

Are you saying the Christian Fasters aren’t masculine enough?

0
Spur

comment image

2
Wakezilla

Dammm

0
theeWeeBabySeamus

The OTHER Wolf Pack (two words out there in Nevada) with some very ugly unis and gonna let Oregon State (hehehehe….Beavers) come back and win this.

Dummies.

1
Spur

Josh Gordon to Dallas is going to happen, isn’t it?

1
ballsofsteelandfury

If it doesn’t, Jerry is a moron. They have 0 WRs.

0
litre_cola

Don’t they have that white rapper guy?

2
theeWeeBabySeamus

I thought Witten retired.

2
Spanky Datass

Beas-wee. (Because he’s small, you see.)

0
herodotus450

Isn’t there another big free agent WR available out there? Big tall guy, went to Okie State? What’s his name… Justin Blackmon?

2
Wakezilla

There’s a North Eastern powerhouse that would probably be interested in a receiver

2
Sharkbait

I find you ideas intriguing and I would like to subscribe to your newsletter

1
Redshirt

I’m thinking he’ll check with Baltimore, Pittsburgh or Cincinnati first to see if they’re interested. That way he can destroy Cleveland twice a year.

2
King Hippo

Cincy already has a shiny John Ross they are insistent on not using. Yinzburgh is loaded at skill positions. Balmer…maybe.

1
Spur

I’ve taken two naps today. Feels good man.

2
Rikki-Tikki-Deadly

By an interesting coincidence, I’ve taken two nips today. Also I’ve had several beers.

1
King Hippo

funny, I was never lauded for demonstrating quickness in the hole

2
yeah right

I however…

0
ballsofsteelandfury

What about going in the wrong hole?

0
King Hippo

ah don’t abide that wickedness!

/have always lived by the “I’ll stay away from your asshole if you stay away from mine” rule with the ladyfolk, and it worked quite nicely

#WASP

1
ballsofsteelandfury

You don’t know what you’re missing…

0
King Hippo

poop and poop-borne bacteria!

0
ballsofsteelandfury

Only if you’re German.

Seriously, does no one take a bath or clean down there?

0
Moose -The End Is Well Nigh

comment image

3
herodotus450

Not sure about that pass intereference call but the Southern Fightin’ Jesuses get a TD

0
Moose -The End Is Well Nigh

comment image

2
herodotus450

Forgot about the part where god appears as a pig who gets slaughtered and cooked, so that means Grease is the word.

2
Moose -The End Is Well Nigh

That’s not a song.

0
litre_cola

This cold has lasted 7 days. Why yes I got drunk on 3 of the evenings but that should be of no consequence!

1
Sharkbait

Alcohol kills germs right? Seems like solid logic.

1
litre_cola

Didnt work. Uggh

0
theeWeeBabySeamus

Try harder.

1
Wakezilla

I’m having culture shock as I’m not used to seeing fucking snow in September

1
litre_cola

If it gives you any solace it rained all fucking week in BC.

1
King Hippo

Tussionex. ALWAYS Tussionex.

0
herodotus450

NAWT a surprise that the Christians don’t practice proper protectin, give up sack fumble TD to osu.

4
Moose -The End Is Well Nigh

comment image

2
Moose -The End Is Well Nigh

comment image

1
Moose -The End Is Well Nigh

comment image

0
Moose -The End Is Well Nigh

comment image

0
Sharkbait

So…Browns gonna brown? Apparently Gordon was cut for being late?

0
King Hippo

He’s a free agent and can play for a real organization now. Really shows him!

3
Moose -The End Is Well Nigh

comment image

2
Sharkbait

Use your black magic fuckery Belichick and sign him!

1
yeah right

Your move Seattle.

0
Wakezilla

You’re joking?

1
litre_cola

Also sort of showed up “abnormal”

1
Ian Scott McCormick

The problem with having your best start in 14 years is all of a sudden you start thinking you’re Belichick.

4
Moose -The End Is Well Nigh

comment image

1
Redshirt

Aw, well. I could’ve seen this coming. Bengals won in primetime. JV Cincinnati is murderdeathkilling a D1A school. I had to pay for all that somehow.

0
King Hippo

TCU has some really sexy fookin’ cheerleaders, will give ’em that much.

1
Moose -The End Is Well Nigh

comment image

0
Wakezilla

And they all do anal because it’s the sex god can’t see

2
Redshirt

I gotta root for Ohio State. Because…well…

comment image

1
Brocky

Oh you poor thing with your pro bowl quarterback.. . …..

2
Redshirt

Yeah, yeah, beggars can’t be choosers, blah blah blah.

0
litre_cola

Mrs Cola is a Bengals fan and does not know how this season will inevitably turn out.

A Marvin Lewis extension!!!

4
King Hippo

oh, he will be there until he (or Mike Brown) dies. It is written.

0
Moose -The End Is Well Nigh

comment image

1
Brocky

comment image

3
Moose -The End Is Well Nigh

comment image

1
herodotus450

TCU qb has 6 games at Jerryworld? But sure, it’s a neutral site game.

1
Brocky

Looking at espn top 25 scores

Huh, why are so many games canceled?

Took me longer than I’d like to admit to realize why

2
King Hippo

because #PussyBitches everywhere smgdh

0
King Hippo

Merry Bloodeyes Christmas!

0
King Hippo

Holy fuck, my vibe was unfortunately correct on this game (for those who actually read mah dumb previews)

1
yeah right

The Reedley College Tigers, the team my nephew is DB coach for, won today 55-27.

Three and OH! Yo!

Kick ass Reedley!

4
King Hippo

huzzah cousin/nephew right!

1
Redshirt

Yay! Go Tigers! Win the Northern California Football Alliance!

1
Redshirt

Alright. Time to see if Ohio State is legit or just full of shit.

1
King Hippo

at least 2 Legit 2 Quit?

1
Redshirt

(hey…hey…)

1
Redshirt

Wow, the guts to pull that off.

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=nAJFLzfRLWM

0
King Hippo

Ha, the interim dipshit is a “Chip Kelly protogee” – what a likable crowd, these B1G sides…

0
Redshirt

What that BYU-WISC recap didn’t show: BYU coach calling two timeouts in an attempt to MEGA ICE the kicker and then feign a third timeout and a ULTRA ICE attempt and then celebrating like he just won the Price is Right Showcase Showdown when he successfully got a young man to choke after standing on the field for two minutes thinking about the kick.

1
King Hippo

I thought he was wasting timeouts, but maybe the head fake on #3 was worth it after all. He got his result!

1
Rikki-Tikki-Deadly

Mango michelada time!

1
Moose -The End Is Well Nigh

comment image

3
Col. Duke LaCross

There might be a little areola there, but I need to watch that thirty or forty more times to be sure.

1
Moose -The End Is Well Nigh

Porn or wrasslin’?

0
Redshirt

Can’t it be both?

2
Moose -The End Is Well Nigh

Yes.

Ultimate Surrender…..

2
Wakezilla

She seems helpful

2
theeWeeBabySeamus

I think I’ve seen that movie.

0
BrettFavresColonoscopy

Self imposed alcohol ban lifted for this wedding. Not enough booze to make it tolerable yet.

4
Moose -The End Is Well Nigh

comment image

4
Gratliff

Can’t decide if this or Raptor mascot eating shit is the best gif on the internet.

2
Moose -The End Is Well Nigh

comment image

0
JustStopDude

Holy shit I just realized I drank a pint of rum.

Dear god…I need to get my shit together…

2
herodotus450

This is a 2-pint minimum site and you know that!

5
Redshirt

A pint total or all at once?

0
herodotus450

ABC coverage of the osu band is so bad you can neither hear them, nor actually see what they are marching to form. At least set up a shotgun mic you dopes!

1
Redshirt

Director: “Now lets show Script Ohio but lets show it at ground level from a corner so we can’t make out what their writing. Oh and definitely cut out the four-year senior tuba player dotting the “i”. No one cares about it and its not like its his dream coming true or something.”

3
JustStopDude

Alabama…just accept it bitches…go limp.

SEC baby! No safe word (

0
Redshirt

The things that makes me pissed about Alabama constantly making the playoffs is that they are actually good enough to earn the spot. That I can’t stand!

0
Redshirt

Top Eight Signs on College GameDay per USA Today

8. Even LeBron left Ohio

7. Where’s Urban?

6. I’d insult Urban but he isn’t here

5. What’s a buckeye?

4. Win or lose…

3. I had a better sign but Urban Meyer covered it up

2. An Ohio State University

1. The Buckeyecracker

1
ballsofsteelandfury

#3 is my favourite

3
Redshirt

I’m kind of partial to #2 though, but I would’ve changed to “An Ohio State University – Columbus Campus”.

Now I want Ohio State to create a lower league football team on one of their regional campuses. Just imagine everyone’s reaction if both “The Ohio State University” and “The Ohio State University at Lima” makes the playoffs.

“The first round is the Ohio State Buckeyes vs. the Ohio State Lima Beans.”

2
King Hippo

absolutely!

0
theeWeeBabySeamus

3. I had a better sign but Urban Meyer covered it up

LMFAO

0
Moose -The End Is Well Nigh

comment image

0
King Hippo

couldn’t handle all that positive energy coming off that opening non-loss

1
Redshirt

https://www.yahoo.com/lifestyle/chelsea-clinton-takes-trolls-accusing-worshipping-satan-shes-pro-abortion-rights-184305248.html

Agent K was right, a person is smart; people are dumb, panicky, dangerous animals.

0
Senor Weaselo

“Methodist? That’s even rougher.” -Headley Lamarr

1
Redshirt

Don’t you mean “Hedy”?

2
Gratliff

I’ve somehow managed to never see anything of Shohreh Aghdashloo until she played the mom in The Punisher on Netflix. Now, I’m working through The Expanse and I think I need to start backtracking and playing catch-up. She’s fucking great.

comment image

3
Moose -The End Is Well Nigh

comment image

How’s the weather out east?

2
King Hippo

little moist!

2
Moose -The End Is Well Nigh

comment image

0
Redshirt

Its 87 degrees outside, the pool is tempting me with a deliciously sparklely clear beauty, and I either have a migraine or someone has misplaced a golf ball just above my right eye.

Bring on the Buckeyes! But quietly and not very brightly.

1
Moose -The End Is Well Nigh

comment image

3
1 2 3 4
518
0
Would love your thoughts, please comment.x
()
x