After the ten game ‘splosion of earlier today we have but three ‘options’ (depending on where you are living) this afternoon. I’m not a fan of this illusion of choice. (h/t, George Carlin) TO THE GAMES!
Chargers/Rammers:
The Battle of Los Angeles (or The Great Los Angeles Air Raid) was started by a very provocative (wait for it) weather balloon that had ill intentions towards the denizens of the heretofore mentioned city. It might have been aliens. Thank gawd there were some trigger-happy artillery folks that told that alien balloon that ‘these colors don’t run’. Perhaps history can repeat itself in this here encounter by qb’s Goff and Rivers throwing all kinds of projectiles at opposing defenses. Yeah, I need wr Cook to put up some points-what of it?
Bears/Cards:
Which Khalil Mack will show up for this game? Is it going to be the unblockable maniac that collapses pockets at will? Or will it be the unholy terror that single-handedly changes the Cards offensive game plan? Which Truth Biscuit will decide to play? The one that under/over-throws his open wr’s? Or will it be the fella that misreads the D on a regular basis?
Cowboys/Seahawks:
This here is the “Stop laughing-We’re Still Relevant, Dammit!” Bowl which is sponsored by the good folks at Blackberry and Kodak. DAK! had a temporary reprieve from the boo-birds courtesy of a porous Giants D last week. Will a headed-south-in-the-standings Seattle team stand up and be counted?
Let’s do that thing that we like to do. Ewwww, not that!
Pete Carroll is going to pass the ball here. Do it Pete.
Getting my pierogi fix. Mmm…
Cowboys death status upgraded to walking dead.
So, Chosen Rosen comes in, leads a late drive but Birdcano misses the FG and loses 16-14?
Don’t you dare call that a Dak TD
Little known fact, Rico Gathers used to play basketball.
So did Hank Gathers. He doesn’t anymore.
I am following a Sudamericano Lesser Footy match that is now 10 v. 8 in added time. My side ($23 at +1175) just took the lead on a penno.
Eh, that’s cheating at limbo
Imma have to disagree.
She’s doing just fine.
And I guess you call standing on an escalator ‘walking up stairs’ too. Forward motion is half the challenge of limbo
Hehehehe.
I find her motion, even if artificial, to be just fine.
YOU SAID THERE WAS NO FILM IN THAT CAMERA!!!!!!
Very few cameras require film nowadays 😀
LOL BRADFORD
I hope Seattle can hold Dallas to under 10 points.
Astute observation Ian
I officially love my Instant Pot. I just made a 1.5 gallons of crab soup in 45 minutes (including preheat cycle). Usually that would require 5-7 hours, and multiple times adding water.
And even a dummy like me managed to use it without blowing the house up.
Yay.
LOLZeke
looooool
Alex Smith, yo crown is in danger
https://twitter.com/wingoz/status/1043988053675692033
What does it matter? He was short if he ain’t fumble.
Boltman is sad.
4th and 5, they throw SHORT! Of course they do.
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=CTAud5O7Qqk
People just don’t know, the Cardinals have been a shitty franchise for a long, long, LONG time.
1920, man.
Damn. Saw the roof was closed on TV and thought, “but it’s actually nice out today. Why didn’t they open it for the Bears game?”
Checked my phone and it’s 103. This is the best time of the year.
Another FG here, and the Shitty CLippers are within 9. Right on the verge of covering!
FGkakke in Arizona!
Bradford vs. Biscuit, whaddya expect?
Ah, X-Men: Apocalypse. The actors tried their best, but you can’t overcome bad writing and plotholes big enough to drive a aircraft carrier through.
Can the Cowboys play the Giants every other week?
– NBC Braintrust
What the hell hurts Miller there? Wrist? Shoulder? Hip?
Stroke
I’m pretty sure the Cowboys D couldn’t even stop a stationary object
Could be harder than it seems if they’re in the wrong frame of reference.
/My go to excuse
Nice Truth Biscuit fade to 2 AZ defenders, just a bit long, though.
The Browns uniforms even look better when they’re not-losing-or-tying.
One bets Chi**** is gonna run. Like, every down.
Honestly, I think Wilks could have been a good HC. Too bad his idiot ass signed with ARI.
Sam BADford.
Banner
Because there is no other way in the world his career will ever get near another one.
Sean Lee hurt?
There is NO WAY Chosen Rosen wouldn’t be an instant improvement.
– Joe Arpaio, messing with an off-brand instant-light log.
LOLBRADFORD
Seriously? Khalil Mack is a beast. He is not responsible for false starts on the opposite end of the line.
Fox fucking C Team.
Shitty Clippers really using a lot of clock on this drive. SMRT!
that field goal drive
Why kick down 15? WTF!
Inside the 10, too. Someone does nae understand math/basic leverage concepts. I hope RRRRRRRRRRRRAM IT!! keeps throwing, Hippo need Baby Buster and Gurley Man points.
A+ awareness by Tavon Austin
Someday this Maher guy is going to miss a field goal left, then it’s going to be prime yucks time.
Chantix commercial would be way funnier if Ray was on a set of some mob movie standing in front of a naked chick with her head blown off and him joking with a couple other guidos.
Pretty sure I ever heard of Jordan Howard in JV.
He played at Indiana, no reason for one to have done so.
Again, I haven’t seen staring like that since I was 13 and girls started to develop
OK, this made me giggle.
Christ. Truth Biscuit is like Tebow out there with his “progressions.”
I feel like Nagy knows Mitchy is a Rex so the only way to a SB win is to absolutely stack the shit out of that defense.
I look forward to shitting the bed against the Colts once again
bears are using that inside pitch play too much to the point it’s predictable in short yardage
fat man int is possible the next time they run it
I’d screen opposite of Peterson every sixth snap.
Is Watson actually good? And why is HOU always so bad?
Cause they Whoston?
came back pretty quick from that knee owie
Cause Bill O’Brien
Go for it, you pussies
I’m only watching the rest of this game because, if ARI is going to go 0-16 this year, they’ve gotta pull out blowing games like this.
Holy shit they totally shot thrift store guy. Right in the back of the head *POW* he’s face first in his baked ziti. That was awesome.
Good secret club meeting?
The best.
So how many more prime time or 430 games does Dallas have this year? As much as I dislike them, I’d like to be spared their shittiness
4 more prime time games. 4 more afternoon games. Enjoy!
Watch on mute, play the soundtrack to Wile E Coyote cartoons instead
Or the Benny Hill Theme.
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=MK6TXMsvgQg
3 yrs. ARI has shown zero interest in getting a competent CB2 across from PP.
This is really not surprising to anyone who has paid attention at all, but the Pokes are goddamned awful.
Is their oline still outstanding?
They are out there standing certainly.
Something doesn’t have to be surprising to be delightful!