Your “Choices, Choices Everywhere” Tuesday Evening Open Thread

Beerguyrob

Beerguyrob

A Canadian man-child of indeterminate age, he stays young by selling alcohol at sporting events and yelling at the patrons he serves. Their rage nourishes his soul, and their tips pay for his numerous trips to various sporting events.
Beerguyrob

Both photos were taken & complied by me outside the Seahawks game on November 4th.

After the last six months of electioneering, I know many people feel one of two sentiments:

or

So, you can spend your evening hate-drinking & hate-watching election results, or you can spend it here with friends, hate-drinking & telling dick jokes about election results. I know you’ll make the right decision.


NFL News:

  • It’s from yesterday, but it’s hilarious nonetheless: former offensive lineman David Diehl said Raiders coaches used to give JaMarcus Russell blank tapes to determine if he was studying film.
    • When quizzed the next day, he would give answers about blitz packages and such, when in fact he was pulling shit out of the air because he didn’t watch them.
    • Bleacher Report helpfully points out that other players available in that draft were Calvin Johnson, Joe Thomas, Patrick Willis or Darrelle Revis.
  • The Saints spent Tuesday working out Dez Bryant & Brandon Marshall.
    • They need a counter-balance to Michael Thomas. The three other Saints receivers had a combined two catches on Sunday.
      • Breesus needs sure-handed disciples.
  • God bless Bruce Arians – he says he’d consider the Browns job, or recommend Chuck Pagano for it.
    • Likely because he’d have to come sub in for Pagano after a year.
    • People forget Arians was the Browns OC the last time they went to the playoffs in 2002.
  • Somebody lit the GAMBLOR signal: the Cardinals opened as a 17-point underdog to the Chiefs this weekend.
    • The most recent big point ‘dog was the Bills, who were 16.5-point underdogs to the Vikings earlier this season and wound up winning the game by 21 points.
    • Beerguyrob’s observation?


A brief “thank you” shout-out to the staff & commentists of [DFO] – we have achieved a modicum of success that should be recognized: we have surpassed being the 350,000th most popular site on the internet.

I have one of my students using Alexa.com‘s free internet stats as part of his specialized learning about IT. (He looks up things like Amazon, CNN, various gaming sites he likes, et cetera. It keeps him busy.) Every so often, I check in to see how we’re doing as an entity. Here’s what it looked like back on October 2nd:

We are well behind sites like Deadspin,

but we also aren’t trying to be sites like Deadspin, so we’re just competing with ourselves to make the site better. As last week’s Halloween spectacular showed, I think we do that on a consistent basis.

FYI – the Top-10 sites worldwide, according to Alexa?

  1. google.com
  2. youtube.com
  3. facebook.com
  4. baidu.com – The leading Chinese language search engine.
  5. wikipedia.org
  6. qq.com – An instant messaging service developed by Shenzhen Tencent Computer System.
  7. yahoo.com
  8. taobao.com – Taobao Marketplace is online shopping for Chinese consumers.
  9. Tmall.com – Tmall.com is a premium online Chinese shopping site within Alibaba Group, and NOT an alternative dating site for curious Chinese men.
  10. amazon.com

Kind of like hitting 4000 posts or 500,000 comments, we couldn’t make any milestones without a dedicated group of people creating, reading & commenting on our #content. So thank you to everyone who helped us achieve this.


Tonight’s sports:

  • NHL:
    • Dallas at Columbus – 7:00PM | Sportsnet
    • Oilers at Lightning – 7:30PM | NBCSN / Sportsnet West
    • Canucks at Red Wings – 7:30PM | Sportsnet Pacific
  • NBA:
    • Wizards at Mavericks – 8:30Pm | TSN / NBATV
  •  NCAA:
    • Football:
      • Kent State at Buffalo – 7:30PM | ESPNU
    • Basketball:
      • Kansas vs. Michigan State – 7:00PM | ESPN / TSN3
        • the Champions Classic, from Bankers Life Fieldhouse in Indianapolis.
      • *North Carolina at Wofford – 7:00PM | ESPN2
      • Morgan State at Villanova – 7:00PM | FS1
      • Florida at Florida State – 9:00PM | ESPN2
      • Maryland (Baltimore County) at Marquette – 9:00PM | FS1
      • Duke vs. Kentucky – 9:30PM | ESPN / TSN3
        • the Champions Classic in Indianapolis, Game 2.
  • WWE:
    • Smackdown LIve! – 8:00PM | USA / Sportsnet360
      • Shane McMahon won the “World Cup” at Crown Jewel. WHAT’S THE ANGLE?!

God forbid any of this nonsense isn’t settled tonight and has to be double checked in the morning. NO REST FOR THE WICKED!

Beerguyrob
Beerguyrob
A Canadian man-child of indeterminate age, he stays young by selling alcohol at sporting events and yelling at the patrons he serves. Their rage nourishes his soul, and their tips pay for his numerous trips to various sporting events.
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Col. Duke LaCrossBrick MeathookWakezillaLow Commander of the Super SoldiersSenor Weaselo Recent comment authors
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Col. Duke LaCross

Medicinal dope passed here in Utah!

Brick Meathook
Brick Meathook

Now that HARDCORE HOMOSEXUALITY is legal in this great land, perhaps AFTER THE SODOMY we can pick out some new drapes, and perhaps paint the living room.
-General George S. Patton, May 1944

Fronkenshteen

do we get to gerrymander yet?

Viva La Tabula Raza
Viva La Tabula Raza

2 indicted republican congressmen re-elected. How proud they must be.

Doktor Zymm

Did they call the CA one?

Viva La Tabula Raza
Viva La Tabula Raza

Yep.

Fronkenshteen

Also: Brian Kemp

Doktor Zymm

I had multiple language options for my “I Voted” sticker. I went with Tagalog.

Low Commander of the Super Soldiers

When will the bloodshed from the Great KSK Cookie War end?

Brick Meathook
Brick Meathook

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Fronkenshteen

Boy trapped in refrigerator? Eats own foot?

Moose -The End Is Well Nigh
Moose -The End Is Well Nigh

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ok, my head is spinning.

Fronkenshteen

BEHIND THE MUSIC: The Rat Pack

Fronkenshteen

Fuck Nancy pelosi. OUT WITH THE OLD!!!!

Fronkenshteen

Rick Santorum is human garbage, and deserves a brain tumor I can see through his skull.

Viva La Tabula Raza
Viva La Tabula Raza

I hope it will be one of those fast-acting tumors, so there’s not even time to see a specialist.
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Moose -The End Is Well Nigh
Moose -The End Is Well Nigh

I will get two subscriptions to your news letter in case one gets lost.

Viva La Tabula Raza
Viva La Tabula Raza

Ooh, Beto drops an F-bomb in this concession speech and MSNBC doesn’t bleep it. Guess someone will be getting a visit from the FCC later this week.

Moose -The End Is Well Nigh
Moose -The End Is Well Nigh

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Fronkenshteen

Yer a genius

Senor Weaselo

Fuck Ajit Pai in perpetuity.

Moose -The End Is Well Nigh
Moose -The End Is Well Nigh

YES.

Viva La Tabula Raza
Viva La Tabula Raza

Coming soon to a barrio, ghetto, or gentrified neighborhood near you!!!
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Rikki-Tikki-Deadly

Nah, those fuckers don’t have the courage or the numbers to pull off something like that. You think a half dozen Proud Boys are going to start breaking windows in Glassell Park? They’d be strung up from telephone polls in ten minutes. They might make some noise in hipster bars, but that’s it.

Viva La Tabula Raza
Viva La Tabula Raza

Well, I’m told that I do get a little hyperbolic on occasion.

Moose -The End Is Well Nigh
Moose -The End Is Well Nigh

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Fronkenshteen

Thank god for Jake Tapper right now.

Brick Meathook
Brick Meathook

Was he on the ’72 Dolphins? They were undefeated, you know.

Moose -The End Is Well Nigh
Moose -The End Is Well Nigh

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Moose -The End Is Well Nigh
Moose -The End Is Well Nigh

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BrettFavresColonoscopy

Well, I’m a few scotches in but a) the house is what I expected to win, not the Senate b) the gubernatorial gains are great c) Americans that chose Republicans in Florida, Georgia, and Texas should be ashamed of themselves d) voter suppression is a helluva drug

Moose -The End Is Well Nigh
Moose -The End Is Well Nigh

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Rikki-Tikki-Deadly

I’m seeing it much the same way. I’m not happy about the results, but I’m not sad about them either. Any “agenda” that Trump has is going to be completely stifled, and the amount of damage Republicans can do has gone down exponentially.

Viva La Tabula Raza
Viva La Tabula Raza

I hope you are right, but I can’t get around my suspicion that Trump will go full authoritarian at some point if he gets continuously stymied.
Then again, my Republican acquaintances felt the same way about Obama.

BrettFavresColonoscopy

Baselessly. That’s the fucked up part. Your Republican acquaintances can’t point to anything actually evil Obama did but Trump and the GOP are running rampant over political norms and standards of decency.

Viva La Tabula Raza
Viva La Tabula Raza

I agree 100%. I am worried that we are going to live in Mad Max world before I can even retire.

Senor Weaselo

I’d say the unfettered access to drone strikes was something I could do without, but I’m guessing the acquaintances would be fine if it was their guy doing it.

Wakezilla

Obama did some evil shit. Obama did prop up Nazis in the Ukraine. He also lobbied for the minimum wage to be 30 cents an hour in Haiti. He did an unprecedented crackdown on whistle blowers and deported more people from American than any president previous to him. He also left office bombing 7 countries and expanded the surveillance state.

Brick Meathook
Brick Meathook

Yeah but those were non-Americans and at the end of the day the only people President Obama owed anything to were Americans. That’s just a fact.

Brick Meathook
Brick Meathook

Nah it isn’t. You’re thinking like the good ol’ USA of Eisenhower and Roosevelt. Trump is thinking something else, and make no mistake he’s good at it and has an arsenal at his disposal. He’s not about to lose, however he is hopelessly flawed, and so are his core supporters.

Understand your enemy if you want to defeat them. He understands you.

Grant and Sherman understood it, after all previous Union Generals were fighting the last decade’s war over and over again and losing. Grant and Sherman understood: go for the throat.

I hate to say that, but read a history book.

Moose -The End Is Well Nigh
Moose -The End Is Well Nigh

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Fronkenshteen

I have to say it is fascinating to watch what the hosts of the podcast Pod Save America said would be the reaction of cable news happen, in real time, and in great detail. We are DOOMED.

Moose -The End Is Well Nigh
Moose -The End Is Well Nigh

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Brick Meathook
Brick Meathook

Now that the Democrats are in charge, tomorrow at work I am going into the Ladies Room and taking the loudest stinky shit ever.

Moose -The End Is Well Nigh
Moose -The End Is Well Nigh

They are in charge of the house, not the senate, you big dummy.

Brick Meathook
Brick Meathook

The bathroom is in the house! Who’s the big dummy now! Jeez!

Moose -The End Is Well Nigh
Moose -The End Is Well Nigh

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Brick Meathook
Brick Meathook

Loogit’ dem big ole titties on Moose

Inanimate Carbon Rod Marinelli

You, dumb: Watching Rachel Maddow blather about election returns on MSNBC

Me, smart: Watching one of the hosts of Chapo Trap House die of alcohol poisoning on a Twitch stream

rockingdog
rockingdog

bahahaha

Moose -The End Is Well Nigh
Moose -The End Is Well Nigh

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Buddy Cole's Halftime Show!
Buddy Cole's Halftime Show!

My amendment to legalize public masturbation was defeated tonight despite endorsements from Charles Barkley and Paul Reubens.

Moose -The End Is Well Nigh
Moose -The End Is Well Nigh

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Viva La Tabula Raza
Viva La Tabula Raza

Pelosi is going to be Speaker of the House? What’s the over/under for how long it takes for Trump to utter the word “cunt” at one of his rallies, or during a 60 Minutes interview?

Brick Meathook
Brick Meathook

Oh good lord I hope not

Viva La Tabula Raza
Viva La Tabula Raza

I kind of hope so

Col. Duke LaCross

I think this is her last rodeo though. I bet she retires in advance of 2020.

Fronkenshteen

We are all these 2 kids behind Pelosi.

Moose -The End Is Well Nigh
Moose -The End Is Well Nigh

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Just switched to Fox for a hot take.

Moose -The End Is Well Nigh
Moose -The End Is Well Nigh

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Brick Meathook
Brick Meathook

HIS KIDS WERE ON THAT BEACH TOO

Buddy Cole's Halftime Show!
Buddy Cole's Halftime Show!

In honor of her district, Nancy Pelosi will now shoot up some fentanyl and shit on a sidewalk.

Inanimate Carbon Rod Marinelli

The only bright side of the Democrats totally eating shit tonight would be she’d finally get deposed but alas…

Senor Weaselo

As much as I love Colbert, he can’t sing as well as Craig. YEAH I SAID IT

Moose -The End Is Well Nigh
Moose -The End Is Well Nigh

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Fronkenshteen

Wrong. Just wrong. Stephen Colbert and Elvis Costello wrote and performed the single greatest Christmas song of all time.
https://youtu.be/pRIgqLfaPbY

Senor Weaselo

That’s not “I Heard Ryan Gosling’s Playing Santa Claus.” I should know, I was one of the guys singing backup!
https://discomfortandjoy.bandcamp.com/track/i-heard-ryan-goslings-playing-santa-claus

Senor Weaselo

Also why are we posting Christmas songs already?

Fronkenshteen

Is Pelosi drunk or unable to manipulate her false teeth?
Also: Polling is DEAD

King Hippo

Adam Schiff is awesome, and I am glad he will have a modicum of power.

Moose -The End Is Well Nigh
Moose -The End Is Well Nigh

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Brick Meathook
Brick Meathook

Wait, is the skipper a chick too? There’s your problem.

Moose -The End Is Well Nigh
Moose -The End Is Well Nigh

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rockingdog
rockingdog

Last funny:
I voted by dropping a bean in the jar marked “laws” instead of the one marked “anarchy” but as always it was a tough choice.

Buddy Cole's Halftime Show!
Buddy Cole's Halftime Show!

I usually just flick the bean

herodotus450
herodotus450

Alabama looks to be passing two state constitutional amendments, one about protecting the sanctity of life (but only until that life exits the uterus) the other “authorizing” the display of the ten commandments. So much for that other Constitution and its “…make no law respecting an establishment of religion…” amendment.

herodotus450
herodotus450

Meanwhile Florida looks to be passing an issue to restore voting rights to light-felons. Can we update that bugs bunny sawing gif accordingly?

Moose -The End Is Well Nigh
Moose -The End Is Well Nigh

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Moose -The End Is Well Nigh
Moose -The End Is Well Nigh

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herodotus450
herodotus450

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Viva La Tabula Raza
Viva La Tabula Raza

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Moose -The End Is Well Nigh
Moose -The End Is Well Nigh

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Nobody talks.
Nobody gets caught.

rockingdog
rockingdog

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rockingdog
rockingdog

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herodotus450
herodotus450

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Brick Meathook
Brick Meathook

This chick reminds me of me when I was 18, minus the tits, curves, tattoos, bouffant hairdo, and the uterus. Other than that, pretty close.

herodotus450
herodotus450

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