Your “Choices, Choices Everywhere” Tuesday Evening Open Thread

Beerguyrob

Beerguyrob

A Canadian man-child of indeterminate age, he stays young by selling alcohol at sporting events and yelling at the patrons he serves. Their rage nourishes his soul, and their tips pay for his numerous trips to various sporting events.
Beerguyrob

Both photos were taken & complied by me outside the Seahawks game on November 4th.

After the last six months of electioneering, I know many people feel one of two sentiments:

or

So, you can spend your evening hate-drinking & hate-watching election results, or you can spend it here with friends, hate-drinking & telling dick jokes about election results. I know you’ll make the right decision.


NFL News:

  • It’s from yesterday, but it’s hilarious nonetheless: former offensive lineman David Diehl said Raiders coaches used to give JaMarcus Russell blank tapes to determine if he was studying film.
    • When quizzed the next day, he would give answers about blitz packages and such, when in fact he was pulling shit out of the air because he didn’t watch them.
    • Bleacher Report helpfully points out that other players available in that draft were Calvin Johnson, Joe Thomas, Patrick Willis or Darrelle Revis.
  • The Saints spent Tuesday working out Dez Bryant & Brandon Marshall.
    • They need a counter-balance to Michael Thomas. The three other Saints receivers had a combined two catches on Sunday.
      • Breesus needs sure-handed disciples.
  • God bless Bruce Arians – he says he’d consider the Browns job, or recommend Chuck Pagano for it.
    • Likely because he’d have to come sub in for Pagano after a year.
    • People forget Arians was the Browns OC the last time they went to the playoffs in 2002.
  • Somebody lit the GAMBLOR signal: the Cardinals opened as a 17-point underdog to the Chiefs this weekend.
    • The most recent big point ‘dog was the Bills, who were 16.5-point underdogs to the Vikings earlier this season and wound up winning the game by 21 points.
    • Beerguyrob’s observation?


A brief “thank you” shout-out to the staff & commentists of [DFO] – we have achieved a modicum of success that should be recognized: we have surpassed being the 350,000th most popular site on the internet.

I have one of my students using Alexa.com‘s free internet stats as part of his specialized learning about IT. (He looks up things like Amazon, CNN, various gaming sites he likes, et cetera. It keeps him busy.) Every so often, I check in to see how we’re doing as an entity. Here’s what it looked like back on October 2nd:

We are well behind sites like Deadspin,

but we also aren’t trying to be sites like Deadspin, so we’re just competing with ourselves to make the site better. As last week’s Halloween spectacular showed, I think we do that on a consistent basis.

FYI – the Top-10 sites worldwide, according to Alexa?

  1. google.com
  2. youtube.com
  3. facebook.com
  4. baidu.com – The leading Chinese language search engine.
  5. wikipedia.org
  6. qq.com – An instant messaging service developed by Shenzhen Tencent Computer System.
  7. yahoo.com
  8. taobao.com – Taobao Marketplace is online shopping for Chinese consumers.
  9. Tmall.com – Tmall.com is a premium online Chinese shopping site within Alibaba Group, and NOT an alternative dating site for curious Chinese men.
  10. amazon.com

Kind of like hitting 4000 posts or 500,000 comments, we couldn’t make any milestones without a dedicated group of people creating, reading & commenting on our #content. So thank you to everyone who helped us achieve this.


Tonight’s sports:

  • NHL:
    • Dallas at Columbus – 7:00PM | Sportsnet
    • Oilers at Lightning – 7:30PM | NBCSN / Sportsnet West
    • Canucks at Red Wings – 7:30PM | Sportsnet Pacific
  • NBA:
    • Wizards at Mavericks – 8:30Pm | TSN / NBATV
  •  NCAA:
    • Football:
      • Kent State at Buffalo – 7:30PM | ESPNU
    • Basketball:
      • Kansas vs. Michigan State – 7:00PM | ESPN / TSN3
        • the Champions Classic, from Bankers Life Fieldhouse in Indianapolis.
      • *North Carolina at Wofford – 7:00PM | ESPN2
      • Morgan State at Villanova – 7:00PM | FS1
      • Florida at Florida State – 9:00PM | ESPN2
      • Maryland (Baltimore County) at Marquette – 9:00PM | FS1
      • Duke vs. Kentucky – 9:30PM | ESPN / TSN3
        • the Champions Classic in Indianapolis, Game 2.
  • WWE:
    • Smackdown LIve! – 8:00PM | USA / Sportsnet360
      • Shane McMahon won the “World Cup” at Crown Jewel. WHAT’S THE ANGLE?!

God forbid any of this nonsense isn’t settled tonight and has to be double checked in the morning. NO REST FOR THE WICKED!

Beerguyrob
Beerguyrob
A Canadian man-child of indeterminate age, he stays young by selling alcohol at sporting events and yelling at the patrons he serves. Their rage nourishes his soul, and their tips pay for his numerous trips to various sporting events.
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Col. Duke LaCrossBrick MeathookWakezillaLow Commander of the Super SoldiersSenor Weaselo Recent comment authors
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Viva La Tabula Raza
Viva La Tabula Raza

So, Dem House challenges/confronts Trump, subpoenas taxes and staff etc. What’s the O/U on how long till martial law is imposed? Maybe GAMBLOR expert King Hippo can provide some insight…

herodotus450
herodotus450

My money’s on trump “not encouraging” violence against his policital enemies, said violence occurring, then he says it was their fault they asked for it, and no one giving a shit. Oh wait.

Viva La Tabula Raza
Viva La Tabula Raza

Logic checks out.

Moose -The End Is Well Nigh
Moose -The End Is Well Nigh

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blaxabbath

Kellyanne will say it’s an assault on the American people and wink.

Then they’ll start slaughtering at the elementary schools and work their way up.

Moose -The End Is Well Nigh
Moose -The End Is Well Nigh

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herodotus450
herodotus450

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Moose -The End Is Well Nigh
Moose -The End Is Well Nigh

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Rikki-Tikki-Deadly

Josh Marshall put it well, quoting the Stones: we didn’t get what we wanted. But we NEEDED to win the House, and we have.

Moose -The End Is Well Nigh
Moose -The End Is Well Nigh

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Moose -The End Is Well Nigh
Moose -The End Is Well Nigh

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Viva La Tabula Raza
Viva La Tabula Raza

So, Beto O’Rourke gained a lot of national exposure, lost his Senate race, and I guess gave up his seat in the house. Does he keep a high profile and run for prez in 20? I might contribute to that campaign.

Buddy Cole's Halftime Show!
Buddy Cole's Halftime Show!

Only if he changes his name to Alpha O’Rourke

Moose -The End Is Well Nigh
Moose -The End Is Well Nigh

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Moose -The End Is Well Nigh
Moose -The End Is Well Nigh

GIF away your problems.

Brick Meathook
Brick Meathook

Sgt. O’Rourke

Moose -The End Is Well Nigh
Moose -The End Is Well Nigh

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Viva La Tabula Raza
Viva La Tabula Raza

“Omega O’Rourke” would be even cooler.

Senor Weaselo

“It’s been done.” -Some guy named Lincoln

Viva La Tabula Raza
Viva La Tabula Raza

Wasn’t he a fucking Republican?

Moose -The End Is Well Nigh
Moose -The End Is Well Nigh

“Well……”

-Mary Todd

Senor Weaselo

“That’s the point we’ve been trying to make!” -The modern-day GOP

Sharkbait
Sharkbait

Is Devin Nunes up for election tonight? Do the right thing California

Moose -The End Is Well Nigh
Moose -The End Is Well Nigh

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Rikki-Tikki-Deadly

All Representatives are up for re-election every election. So yes, he is. Don’t be shocked if the cowfuckers send him back to DC, thought he’ll be irrelevant now.

Moose -The End Is Well Nigh
Moose -The End Is Well Nigh

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Viva La Tabula Raza
Viva La Tabula Raza

Gotta stay up and see if that sucker-of-Russian-cock Rohrabacher gets ousted.

rockingdog
rockingdog

found a cool:
Projection: today is the first day in history Americans have elected more than 100 women to the U.S. House of representatives.

Brick Meathook
Brick Meathook

They’ll probably menstruate all over some important legislation.

Moose -The End Is Well Nigh
Moose -The End Is Well Nigh

GREAT! Now we gots a bear problem!

Moose -The End Is Well Nigh
Moose -The End Is Well Nigh

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Rikki-Tikki-Deadly

So the Dems are going to take the House. Looks like I’ll be sober for the next two weeks.

I think maybe I should volunteer in a hospice in a rural area so I can watch Republican voters die.

Moose -The End Is Well Nigh
Moose -The End Is Well Nigh

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King Hippo

the suburbs held, and continue to run left as fast as humanly possible. Wake County, NC. Dallas (whatever the county is), TX. Johnson County, KS.

But so much of the rest of the country came out and PROVED they really do want fascism. It’s scary as fuck. And fuck Florida right in all its various fuckholes.

Moose -The End Is Well Nigh
Moose -The End Is Well Nigh

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Viva La Tabula Raza
Viva La Tabula Raza

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Brick Meathook
Brick Meathook

I’m actually getting all my election news from this site. My franchise as an American Citizen is being wholly informed by alcoholic Canadians.

Viva La Tabula Raza
Viva La Tabula Raza

They’re probably more well-informed than most USAers.

Brick Meathook
Brick Meathook

I wrote myself in for Prime Minister of Los Angeles County.

Moose -The End Is Well Nigh
Moose -The End Is Well Nigh

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Gratliff

Michigan went blue, held the senate seat, legalized weed, automated voter registration, and changed the rules for redistricting it so it has to be done by a bipartisan committee. Not bad for one election. Let’s see what the rest of the country looks like:
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Moose -The End Is Well Nigh
Moose -The End Is Well Nigh

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herodotus450
herodotus450

Heh meanwhile south of the border, an Ohio issue to merely reclassify drug possesion from a felony to misdemeanor is losing 65%-35%.

Gratliff

We’ll never solve the opioid epidemic without having every person who’s even heard of heroin in a state penitentiary.

Moose -The End Is Well Nigh
Moose -The End Is Well Nigh

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Buddy Cole's Halftime Show!
Buddy Cole's Halftime Show!

I was at a loss while voting today for an incumbent I don’t like who ran unopposed, so I used one of your handles. I was also too hungover to remember so if you win, cheers.

Low Commander of the Super Soldiers

It was SonOfSpam, wasn’t it?

Sharkbait
Sharkbait

I hope it was BallsofSteel

Viva La Tabula Raza
Viva La Tabula Raza

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Nah,don’t, I’m too fucking lazy.

Brick Meathook
Brick Meathook

BRICK MEATHOOK: The Name You Trust

Moose -The End Is Well Nigh
Moose -The End Is Well Nigh

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Moose -The End Is Well Nigh
Moose -The End Is Well Nigh

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Brick Meathook
Brick Meathook

VALUES VOTER (and Warriors fan)
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Moose -The End Is Well Nigh
Moose -The End Is Well Nigh

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Gratliff

Patton Oswalt just leaked the DNC’s slogan for the general election: Show Your Belly 2020

Moose -The End Is Well Nigh
Moose -The End Is Well Nigh

What about in the south?

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Moose -The End Is Well Nigh
Moose -The End Is Well Nigh

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Buddy Cole's Halftime Show!
Buddy Cole's Halftime Show!

This NJ senate race margin is so tight Bob Menendez is going to have sex with it in the Dominican Republic.

Moose -The End Is Well Nigh
Moose -The End Is Well Nigh

He told you not to talk about that…… fact finding trip.

Moose -The End Is Well Nigh
Moose -The End Is Well Nigh

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Brick Meathook
Brick Meathook

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Low Commander of the Super Soldiers

I probably shouldn’t keep writing my Best Man’s speech and switch back to a BOLTMAN piece I started today, because current mood is:

Sharkbait
Sharkbait

Low Commander of the Super Soldiers

Hot Taek: Both of those characters are the absolute worst part of that show. I have never understood why people find Aziz Ansari funny.

Sharkbait
Sharkbait

Jean Ralphio was easily the worst. Aziz had some moments on that show.

Wakezilla

Nah, Aziz was the worst because you were supposed to hate Jean Ralphio and JR got his comeuppance. Aziz’s character was a two face snake

Moose -The End Is Well Nigh
Moose -The End Is Well Nigh

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Spur
Spur

Lee J. Carter @carterforva
5m5 minutes ago

Left-leaning Dems are overperforming in Trump districts, and right-leaning Dems are failing.

Can we retire the idea that there be dragons on the left? People want a fighter!

Spur
Spur

Evan better those “Left Leaning Dems” are just returning to the New Deal FDR platform. It’s not Left Leaning it’s common sense ideas.

Gratliff

Alexandria Ocasio-Cortez just became the youngest congresswoman in American history by whooping on a shitty centrist stooge in the primary, so there’s that.

ballsofsteelandfury

So, I was just watching Caddyshack and this bothered me:

At the last hole, it’s announced that the match is All Square. Everyone has a putt of roughly equal distance. The Doc misses his. The Judge makes his. Ty misses.

HOW COME TY TELLS DANNY THAT IF HE MISSES, THEY LOSE?!?

Worst case, it’s a draw, no? Granted, Cervik doubles the bet on whether Danny makes the putt, making the scores irrelevant, but this seems wrong.

Thoughts?

Sharkbait
Sharkbait

Holy damn. You’re right.

Viva La Tabula Raza
Viva La Tabula Raza

For a plot hole like that, the screenwriter Doug Kenney should be thrown off a high cliff.

Col. Duke LaCross

Wooof!

Brick Meathook
Brick Meathook

THE STORK

Col. Duke LaCross

Everyone thought The Stork was brain damaged!

Brick Meathook
Brick Meathook

WHAT THE HELL WE S’POSED TO DO YA MO-RONS

Moose -The End Is Well Nigh
Moose -The End Is Well Nigh

They also portrayed gophers completely inaccurately.

herodotus450
herodotus450

FINALLY someone read my newsletter! But: isn’t it possible in match play to have some kind of carryover between holes?

Moose -The End Is Well Nigh
Moose -The End Is Well Nigh

Also; the boat scene!?!? Come the fuck on!

Viva La Tabula Raza
Viva La Tabula Raza

Hey, you scratched my anchor!

Moose -The End Is Well Nigh
Moose -The End Is Well Nigh

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Sharkbait
Sharkbait

God damnit Texas.

Moose -The End Is Well Nigh
Moose -The End Is Well Nigh

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blaxabbath

Those people love to hate.

Viva La Tabula Raza
Viva La Tabula Raza

Fucking cocksucking motherfucking Canadian carpetbagging motherfucker.

Moose -The End Is Well Nigh
Moose -The End Is Well Nigh

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Senor Weaselo

Staten Island turned blue, which is surprising. In fairness, it can still go fuck itself.

Sharkbait
Sharkbait
Moose -The End Is Well Nigh
Moose -The End Is Well Nigh

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Viva La Tabula Raza
Viva La Tabula Raza

The fuckery that the ND state lege pulled to disenfranchise the Native American voters was epic. Fuckers

blaxabbath

The natives should scalp them.

Moose -The End Is Well Nigh
Moose -The End Is Well Nigh

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Sharkbait
Sharkbait

Good. Fuck her.

Moose -The End Is Well Nigh
Moose -The End Is Well Nigh

Sorry, didn’t switch; I posted below. But the response still fits….

blaxabbath

Lying Ted to Beautiful Ted to Assassinated Ted?

One can hope.

Spur
Spur

Kansas Blue Itself.

blaxabbath

Seriously, Meghan McCain should just run for office now. She’ll shit on her father’s grave herself if it means she gets to be the deciding vote to take healthcare from any Mexican.

Gratliff

Apparently Patton Oswalt is going to be on the Chapo election twitch stream if anyone wants to listen to people put into words the hatred I feel in my heart

litre_cola

Anyone from the Whigs get in?

Moose -The End Is Well Nigh
Moose -The End Is Well Nigh
Spur
Spur

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Spur
Spur

See, the East is a Lost Cause. The West will lead the way.

blaxabbath

Oh, the east coasters too busy jerking themselves off than to actually produce?! Color me
Shocked!

blaxabbath

Fox News calling the house majority to the Dems. Their twitter followers are sure this is a ploy to get west coast Dems to leave lines and not vote. Or they’re saying, “HOW CAN YOU CALL IT WITH VOTES LEFT TO COUNT?!”

Fucking morons.

Sharkbait
Sharkbait

Not the sharpest tools in the shed.

Viva La Tabula Raza
Viva La Tabula Raza

Did Karl Rove jump up and go into the counting room to demand ANSWERS, DAMMIT?!?!

Moose -The End Is Well Nigh
Moose -The End Is Well Nigh
Moose -The End Is Well Nigh
Moose -The End Is Well Nigh

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I need to comfort myself.

Moose -The End Is Well Nigh
Moose -The End Is Well Nigh

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blaxabbath

America: our elections are unsecure, the republicans have voted against securing them and even sent a delegation of us legislators to Moscow on July 4th to conspire with the Russian government, which is just an international mob enterprise.

Also America: I can’t believe our elections are not fair and open and we continue to have the government hojacked by a handful of traitors!

Moose -The End Is Well Nigh
Moose -The End Is Well Nigh

“Hojacked”

Best typo ever.

Moose -The End Is Well Nigh
Moose -The End Is Well Nigh

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Gratliff

Schumer sold out a billion federal judge seats for this

Moose -The End Is Well Nigh
Moose -The End Is Well Nigh

Amy?

WCS

Conor Lamb beats completely shithead Keith Rothfus. That’s a clean sweep for me. I did my part.

Cheers!

Moose -The End Is Well Nigh
Moose -The End Is Well Nigh

To the slaughter?

Sharkbait
Sharkbait

Same here. I voted for Gonzalez, but Baker will win. but he’s in a deep blue state, so it could be worse.

MA is also voting to approve a commission to look into overturning Citizens United.

Moose -The End Is Well Nigh
Moose -The End Is Well Nigh
Moose -The End Is Well Nigh
Moose -The End Is Well Nigh

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Moose -The End Is Well Nigh
Moose -The End Is Well Nigh

“I know I’m completely voting against my own interests, but I’m totally owning these libtard cucks.”

blaxabbath

I hope to see entitlements slashed and trump voters modeling their jaundice at the bus stops to drive the snowflakes CRAZY.

Moose -The End Is Well Nigh
Moose -The End Is Well Nigh

Gots to repurpose revenues collected for entitlements to pay for high end tax cuts; that’s going to show ’em and own ’em.

blaxabbath

If the boomers are going to leave things for others to suffer for decades, they deserve to suffer under it for a few years.

Moose -The End Is Well Nigh
Moose -The End Is Well Nigh

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Sharkbait
Sharkbait

Fox is going to flip their shit when Rashida Tlaib gets sworn in.

Moose -The End Is Well Nigh
Moose -The End Is Well Nigh

Spur
Spur

Westward Ho. the East is so disappointing. Left Coast Commies Mount Up!

Sharkbait
Sharkbait

This.

Moose -The End Is Well Nigh
Moose -The End Is Well Nigh

What?!? This is a mandate!

To continue and accelerate destroying this country.

Moose -The End Is Well Nigh
Moose -The End Is Well Nigh

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