To borrow from that Lightfoot song that everyone knows, in northern Ontario the winds of November come early. I use that to my advantage. Earlier in the spring I noticed a guy talking to himself by the corner store. I was waiting while my wife was playing her ‘special numbers’. I got out of my pickup, grabbed a twenty from my wallet and stretched the old legs. I walked up to him and said, “I think you need this” and handed over the bill. “I’ll buy some smokes”, was all he said.
Later that summer I spotted him at the entrance of the grocery store I frequent. Still babbling to no one in particular, still in the shabbiest of clothes. I called to him, ‘remember me?’. I think he nodded out of habit, maybe a bit annoyed about his external monologue being interrupted. I tossed him another 20. He looked at it and said, ‘yeah, yeah, yeah…’. It was a good sign that things weren’t getting any better for him.
As I say, November comes round and the little itch has turned into a pounding in my head. I drive by the bus station, the liquor store and the 7/11 on a regular basis. Nothing. You cultivate a crop with care and you expect that the harvest will be bountiful. Couple days later I spot him. He’s shivering under a lamp post downtown. “Hey dude, wanna warm up?” He recognizes me, for that I’m grateful. Makes things easier. He gets in the front seat and I tell him to open the glove compartment so he can have the cigarettes that I bought more than a few weeks ago for this occasion. He’s grateful. He smells just as bad as I thought he would. Maybe worse?
We both don’t talk much. He’s trying to get the feeling back in his toes and I’m wondering why the closed beach seems like the right place. “Ah fuck it” I think, and pull out the pistol and fire into his forehead. His head ricochets against the window, shattering it. Warm blood on my face feels really good. Hope I get back to the garage before anyone notices anything.
TO THE GAME!
Vikes/Bears:
Will Ursa Major or Ursa Minor show their visage ce soir ? The Hippo that we all know be hopin’ it’s the former. After all, there’s money on the line.
I want candy.
I slept through the game, these things happen. But when I asked Alexa for the score she told me the Eagles beat the Cowboys? Nope, know that’s not right. Congrats Bear types
I’m watching air racing on NBCSN which is surprisingly boring.
Needs more air rifles
not gonna lie, I didn’t think the bears would win.
close game against a team with a decent coach. bears still felt relatively untested
so, yeah right, you still around?
how much did you lose?
180. I might be done with the gambling shit. I’ll let you know.
Re: Torrance
HELLS YES
I have not heard that. But I don’t think Lady BFC needs another reason not to come with.
We can all meet you at LAX between flights.
Safest way to guarantee hang out time
Okay! Meet-up at Barney’s Beanery in Terminal 2!
I’m in!
Terminal 2 is for hosers
Terminals 3, 4, and 6 have the awesome mosaic tunnels!
I miss those!
Terminal 1 has the Vegas weekend strippers/ hookers.
Ah Terminal 1. The “locals” terminal. Also Imperial Terminal on the south side across the street from El Segundo and yeah right. There’s a museum there now but back in the day it was the Playboy Magazine terminal for flights to Vegas and elsewhere.
I’m down 54 points with only Travis Kelce left to play. And Yahoo thinks I have a 4% chance of winning.
“My snapper and my holder did a hell of a job”
That is also a phrase women use after a great masturbation session.
Kurt [sic] Cousins can suck it.
No, Cris. Shortstops often lay back for the nice hop, third basemen charge.
This is good information to know.
I’d like to see an interception here
I did not
It only took 3 1/2 quarters for me to finally be mad at starting Mariota (who got hurt in earyl) over Cousins (my QB1 all year so far)!
I have not had to do this. Yet.
FUCKING DIGGS
As the drunk guys say at Soldier Field,
SUPER BEARS SUPER BOWL
Also, “call my cardiologist!”
Let my big dumb saturated fat infused people enjoy the moment
Maybe now the fatheads who think doinking four field goals in a game isn’t a fluke can drown in their Old Style.
Let us all drown in our Old Styles! Please! My friends! Let us drink!
We’re in Chicago where only misery is possible and to drown is salvation
Wait, you haven’t been drinking this whole time?
I mean, every kicker has a fucked-up day once in awhile.
I mean, it does take skill.
WOO!!!!!!
John Madden understood onomatopoeias unlikes me, Cris Collinsworth, who has a bird brain.
KICK IT!!!
the fuck was THAT playcall??
the naked bootleg ALWAYS WORKS
The part I really don’t get is Collinsworth saying, Trubisky is clearly giving himself up. Trubisky was half falling forward, half sliding sideways. And Collinsworth is always fucking, “I don’t know how they can play defense any more! This new NFL! Receivers have it so much easier nowadays!”
one more first down, Bollo
I mean there’s stupid…
a little makeup call
I’ll take it
God. Dammit.
Refs are absolutely turning games with their “showmanship” this week. It’s been awful.
“The More You Ho” ™
NONSENSE
BLEE’RGH Gone Wild