Your Sunday Afternoon NFL Football Open Thread

Has the playoff picture become clearer after the noon-ish tilts? I’m guessing that the answer is, if not ‘no’, then ‘kinda’. Well, get thee ready for some more jockeying…

TO THE GAMES!

Rams/Cards:

Of course there are some teams doing other things. Arizona, for example is focusing on giving some of their young talent a little more playing time. They’re also wondering if Old Sure Hands Fitz is heading for that ranch in New Mexico where he can catch more than a break in his second career. Ya see, he’s undecided about another year doing wonderful things in front of tens of appreciative fans. As for the game itself the stats point to a rout. The Cards have allowed the most rushing TD’s in the league and the Rams have run for the second-most. Passing, scoring, points given up and other indicators fall pretty much right in line with the one mentioned above.

Bears/Niners:

I keep waiting for the other shoe to drop on the Bears but have come to realize that there’s nary a Manolo Blahnik in sight. Rook San Fran tackle McGlinchey has cut his baby teeth on the likes of Von Miller, Dee Ford, Melvin Ingram and Chandler Jones but now it’s Big Fella time with a Mack trucking into his view.

Steelers/Saints:

Ingram and Kamara are called Boom and Zoom? Did The Wiggles win the naming contest? The Ravens win yesterday means that if Pitt wins out they’re in. If not, it then becomes a matter of dunking for the largest turds (Steelers, Colts, Ravens and Titans) in the septic pit that is the AFC’s second-level teams.

Shitter’s full!

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blaxabbath

Opted to wait in line at Walmart here instead of doing self-check.

May every job in America seriously be replaced by automation ASAP.

King Hippo

all hail robot overlords!

Doktor Zymm

It would probably be pretty easy to automate Congress

blaxabbath

::flushing toilet sound::

Brick Meathook

When Amazon gains full control it will indeed all be automated, chum.

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I saw someone on Twitter say the next big tech scandal will be a whistle blower revealing Amazon employees are exchanging Alexa recordings of people fucking for the lulz and I can’t really argue that’s not happening

Doktor Zymm

Did you see the thing where they sent thousands of Alexa voice recordings of a stranger to some guy?

Doktor Zymm

Wow, I missed some awesome stuff in the early games. I’m glad highlights are a thing.

Brick Meathook

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Big mood

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The Bears have been uh.. not exactly great

King Hippo

emotional win followed by hangover game

Doktor Zymm

They’re pretty good at playing just comprtently enough to get a not great draft pick

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Oh goddamn it

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The Bears aren’t getting a bye, stop talking about it

King Hippo

do Bearistocrats! win the tiebreaker with Non-Gendered Cowpersons?

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If they both finished 10-6 the Cowboys would have the superior conference record, so no.

King Hippo

I would like them out of the RRRRRRRRRRRRAM IT! side of the bracket, so they both make the NFC Title Match. But I do nae want Minny to make the playoffs. Quite the quandary.

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Vikings-Rams is probably the preferable path to Seahawks-Saints.

King Hippo

fair do

King Hippo

Fiona Apple, still a bad, bad girl

Horatio Cornblower

I look forward to her next album title that grossly exceeds Twitter’s 280 character limit.

The Maestro

DEBOREST FUCKNER!

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Hey everybody. Happy Browns Won’t Finish Last Day!

Mr. Ayo

FITZDOWN!

King Hippo

also DJ!!

King Hippo

I put $40 on Yinzers to win as a jinx bet

Mr. Ayo

Thank you for your service.

Horatio Cornblower

Not all heroes leave the house.

Spur

I havent see a Rosen run that fast since 1938.

ArmedandHammered

Bullshit, that should be less of a pass interference not involving a Patriot, that they had ever seen.

tomsellecksmoustache

What a trash PI call.

King Hippo

Coach Epps puts on his concerned face.

Spur

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Spur

Bailout for the Saints.

King Hippo

good jerb, BLEERGH!!!

King Hippo

Buster’s running score gets me within 63! And I still have Donks D/ST, so bargaining stage stays within reach.

Senor Weaselo

Brieda’s hurt now. So, you know, fuck it all anyway.

ArmedandHammered

Sideshow Bob is hurt.

King Hippo

glad Pettis stepped up after Fellaini cut his locks

King Hippo

BLEERGH loves this Packers/Jest OT

tomsellecksmoustache

Is there a more punchable coach in the NFL than Sean Payton?

The Maestro

Gruden.

King Hippo

Fatty Gruden?

/ok, either Gruden

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Are we restricted to head coaches, because no one can resist planting a fist in Josh McDaniels face

ArmedandHammered

Gregg Williams

Brick Meathook

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King Hippo

yes, I certainly should have started CJ Anderson over stupid David Johnson

The Maestro

I thought that was spelled David stupid Johnson?

King Hippo

/am too high 2 spel

King Hippo

Wow, Sean Payton can’t resist getting cute.

Spur

Lots of Bears and fans of Bears in San Fran.

King Hippo

can’t tell by the huskiness, so check FOAR teh chaps

King Hippo

all that’s left to root for is PIT missing the playoffs due to (i) tying #ThePauls; and/or (ii) the end zone pickerception to Denver’s NT.

tomsellecksmoustache

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Okay, after that missed field goal I really regret not being at the free drink bar.

Spur

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I think Thom is calling the Bears game because he’s being subtly bitchy about Chicago as he usually is when he calls Reds games. It’s gonna be great having him call a season of Yasiel Puig games.

Spur

Sure Rodgers…no one cares jerkface.

Mr. Ayo

lol JEST

Spur

Time to hate watch the Steelers. Saints need to blow those assholes out.

rockingdog

alright baby buster. really hoping you ball out against the redbirds

Spur

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Romonobyl

Dammit nonexistent northeastern Texas football club!

Spur

Philly won. Clowney cost the game.

King Hippo

run twice to bleed clock?

Mr. Ayo

Yeah. 500s going down as usual.

King Hippo

clearly, 500s wasn’t thinking so

King Hippo

sure, leave ERTZ wide the fuck open

Spur

Fly Eagle Fans Fly comment image

King Hippo

goddamnit, Buster

The Maestro

Igglez iz ded

The Maestro

I was wrong! Good job, Igglez.

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The same bar that offered a drink-free-until-someone-scores is doing that again today and I’m regret a little bit that I didn’t go.

King Hippo

HOW IS THAT A PENALTY?

Mr. Ayo

Foles ded!

King Hippo

And then the ppls say
Nick Foles’ wang shrank three sizes that day

Romonobyl

I want to have Vander Esch’s babies.

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