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Your Saturday Evening “Why Do I Do This Every Year?” [DFO] Hate Week Open Thread

Beerguyrob

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Hi everyone,

It’s your ol’ pal Beerguyrob, here to entertain you on another Saturday night.

Well, it’s the night before “The Big Game”.™®© As is custom, I thought I’d let the music do the talking, with the input of several fellow Commentists from the various Open Threads during the week.

To start things off, we’ve got GWAR with my feelings on everybody asking Tom Brady about how much of a legacy game Sunday will be.

Meanwhile, King Hippo takes us back to the St. Louis Rams’ victory over Steve McNair & the Titans with “Wasted Days” by the Cloud Nothings.

Low Commander invokes the anthem of Bad Religion to remind us all that Roger Goodell is a National Disgrace, whereas Dean Spanos is just a statewide disgrace.

Never forget that all of their words are a warm and septic breeze.

Rikki reminds us that no matter how hard we try or want a different outcome, it’s still us against them – and they’re winning.

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=fs6gQPpWuts

Yeah Right reminds us that there is indeed no escape, so much like the Architect wishes to destroy Zion, so too must we cleanse this world with flame, end this, cleanse this, then rebuild and start again – hopefully without The One Bill Belichick.

Finally, Redshirt – God bless him – comes through with the words of wisdom that must have helped through every one of Marv Lewis’ 14 seasons in Cincinnati.

Of course, we can’t forget Gronk’s playing.

Tonight’s sports:

  • NFL:
    • NFL Honors – 9:00PM | CBS
      • Sometime during the broadcast, they will announce the 2019 Hall of Fame class.
        • Reminder – here’s who made the short-list:
          • Tony Gonzalez, Isaac Bruce, Edgerrin James, Ed Reed, Steve Atwater, Champ Bailey, Ty Law, John Lynch, Tony Boselli, Steve Hutchinson, Alan Faneca, Kevin Mawae, Richard Seymour, Don Coryell, Tom Flores.
  • NHL:
    • Penguins at Leafs – 7:00PM | CBC
    • Red Wings at Senators – 7:00PM | City
    • Ducks at Jets – 7:00PM | Sportsnet
    • Lightning at Rangers – 8:00PM | NBC
    • Canucks at Avalanche – 10:00PM | CBC
  • NBA:
    • Lakers at Warriors – 8:30PM | ABC / TSN2
  • NCAA:
    • Indiana at Michigan State – 6:00PM | ESPN
    • Syracuse at Pittsburgh – 6:00PM | ESPN2
    • Kansas State at Oklahoma State – 6:00PM | ESPNU
    • George Mason at VCU – 6:30PM | NBCSN
    • Tennessee at Texas A&M – 8:00PM | ESPN
    • Alabama at Auburn – 8:00PM | ESPN2
    • New Mexico at Fresno State – 10:00PM | ESPNU
  • Futbol:
    • Liga MX:
      • León vs. Cruz Azul – 7:55PM | UNI
      • Tijuana vs. Toluca – 10:00PM | FS1
    • International Friendly Soccer:
      • U.S. vs. Costa Rica – 8:00PM | FS1

Oh football,

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Moose -The End Is Well Nigh

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1
Gratliff

Today’s theme is songs that I absolutely love by bands I will otherwise go out of my way to turn off. Their look in this concert is almost as bad as the rest of their music.
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=s8Eo-y10Kt4

0
Beerguyrob

They’re Ralph Lauren models compared to REO Speedwagon.

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ZQ-uWQJNx7w

0
Redshirt

Phil is now in his third Groundhog Day. Meanwhile, Richard from “Somewhere in Time” is punching a wall at the thought of someone repeating the same day until he finds his true love.

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=BzfuXJ9NwlM

1
Redshirt

Punching the wall really, really hard.

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=GVZrj6S3Hhk

0
Gratliff

My dog refusing to let me brush her teeth in the most annoying way possible by just keeping her lips closed and slowly turning her head while sitting still, so I no longer give a fuck if she has teeth at 5

0
Moose -The End Is Well Nigh

To be fair; I do the same thing to myself.

2
Moose -The End Is Well Nigh

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1
Spur

Good Bad Movie
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=EBFwxsY62Uw

1
Unsurprised

How random. I was just thinking about this movie.

0
Redshirt

Groundhog Day Counter: 2

Phil’s already losing it and he’s five minutes in.

0
Porky Prime

HTFYDB?!?

Just thought I’d add to the TV listings. Top Rank Boxing and UFC on the…the +. I know, I know, but I like ESPN+. Seriously, fights since 4pm through like 11, too bad there’s no split screen.

PRAISE BLEERGH!!!

5
Spur

Groundhog Day Discussion – Did Phil shower each morning?

1
Gratliff

It’s where he prefers to jerk off

2
Gratliff

Interesting day to be a hardcore leftist in Virginia.

what a long day. got up really early, lit a cigarette on a burning effigy of a klansman, got stuck in super bowl traffic in a minivan full of heavily armed leftists, and watched my governor consider moonwalking at a press conference after admitting to doing blackface.

— molly ? (@socialistdogmom) February 3, 2019

https://platform.twitter.com/widgets.js

4
Redshirt

Watching “Groundhog Day”. Its listed as a comedy, even though its a person stuck in his own personal hell repeating the same day for anywhere for 8 years, 8 months and 16 days.

2
Spur

He spent at least 20 years there. He learned about the whole town. That took years.

1
Ian Scott McCormick

The whole town wouldn’t take that long. Becoming a piano player of note and a master ice sculptor? Different story.

1
Redshirt

Correction: Ramis said it took 10 years to learn the piano based on how good he played in his final loop. He could’ve been in there for thousands of years. He could’ve spent hundreds of them killing himself over and over again.

2
Unsurprised

I’m pretty sure he once said Phil was doing it for centuries.

0
Redshirt

I went by the director and some internet experts. I’ve heard estimates of 34 years.

If he didn’t find true love, or learn how to be selfless, or if God finally put his beer off of Phil’s REPEAT button, he would’ve repeated that forever.

Even dying of old age didn’t save him. He didn’t age.

1
Rikki-Tikki-Deadly

Just imagine if he’d started the day with a hangover.

4
Ian Scott McCormick

Holy shit. I never considered that.

3
Unsurprised

That’s evil.

0
Spur

i wish Pau Gasol was 10 years younger. He’s just too old now to be useful.

0
Rikki-Tikki-Deadly

As a followup to Brick’s post down below, two days ago after there was a break in the rain, my wife and I went to Costco. IT WAS THE BEST TRIP EVER! They had at least a dozen stations for samples set up – mostly sausage stuff – and the place was virtually empty.

2
Ian Scott McCormick

What’s the worst store to be stuck at? I think it’s Bed Bath & Beyond just because there is no cool section anywhere. Costco has the stations. Home Depot has the cool ass grills I’m never going to buy. BB&B is just wall to wall linens. Maybe you could argue Michael’s but not as suffocating. I don’t feel like I might actually be trapped in a Michael’s. BB&B feels like I’m one misstep away from being trapped by the minotaur. They need to meet me halfway and sell something like fresh popcorn or something. They could get fancy with the flavors. How about pommes frites? That’d be something I could at least look forward to.

1
tomsellecksmoustache

Open question to all: As a fellow unfortunate soul who was diagnosed by a shaman with hypertension, does rye whiskey contain enough sodium to stop drinking it? Asking for a friend.

1
Rikki-Tikki-Deadly

I have a degree in chemistry from arguably the best chemistry undergraduate program in the United States, and I assure you that it does not have too much sodium.

/actually has no idea

2
Rikki-Tikki-Deadly

According to the internet, bourbon has none. So you are probably fine.

2
tomsellecksmoustache

Thanks, doctor. I’ll drink until it goes away.

2
Spur

–Truman Capote

2
herodotus450

Good to know
/Orders bourbon margarita with extra salt on the rim

1
herodotus450

Canaudian anthem music was originally written by someone named Calixa Lavallée. And he somehow fought in the American Civil War.
https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Calixa_Lavall%C3%A9e

0
Spur

Never Forget
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=VTHtL3NYb4Y

0
herodotus450

Heehee, the Red Wings color commentator basically just spends the whole game complaining about the refs and making thinly veiled references to how much he used to drink as a player.

1
Spur

Bat delay in San Antonio again.

2
Spur

And the Coyote got him

2
WCS

YOU GET RABIES! AND YOU GET RABIES! EVERYONE GETS RABIES!

2
SonOfSpam

This guy running around on the court again?
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5
Spur

he has a Texan-size physique

4
SonOfSpam

Na na na na na na na na VIRGIN

4
Redshirt

https://variety.com/2019/gaming/news/groundhog-day-sequel-game-1203126479/

Groundhog Day is getting a sequel as a VR game. Because repeating the same day over and over and over ad infinitum is exactly the film that people want to recreate. Screw flying the Death Star chasm or storming the beaches of Normandy.

1
Rikki-Tikki-Deadly

One of the interesting questions I thought was associated with that situation was whether you would have the inclination to start doing horrible acts (like murder and rape and murderrape) and if so, whether you would have the guts to take the chance that once you did something like that, *that* would be the day that time started moving normally again.

3
SonOfSpam

/gets Groundhogged a thousand days in a row

“Ok, that’s it. I’m gonna cut off my own dick and eat it in the middle of Times Square.”

/Groundhogging ends

4
Redshirt

Good point. If anything that’s shows the type of person Phil was. The worst he did was use his knowledge for a one-night stand, punch Ned in the face, or just mess with people. When he reached the point of hopelessness, he only killed himself over and over again instead of hurting anyone else.

Well except Phil of course.

2
Spur

Go Spurs Go

0
King Hippo

#NetsHouse

and don’t yeeeewwwww forget it! 😀

1
Redshirt

(Northham again)

Oh, good. Its gets better.

A reporter asked if he still knows how to moonwalk (because that’s the question we all want answered here). He smiled like he was about to do it, but his wife (I think?) behind him said “Inapporpriate circumstances” in a tone that say, “God help me, if you do the moonwalk, I will divorce you right here!”

2
King Hippo

you see, when y’all is stuck in a hole, KEEP digging until ya get all teh way to Red China!

0
SonOfSpam

“Hey Cardi B, I got a Quarter B named Tommy B!” /cripwalks

2
Spur

Anyone got a Arctic Vortex story from this week? I love me some good weather stories.

0
Redshirt

Its wasn’t during an Arctic Vortex, but I can tell you about the time I turned my road into a ice covered pond. Lets just say that just because the sump pump doesn’t freeze at 25 degrees doesn’t mean the water won’t freeze once it hits the curb and street.

0
SonOfSpam

On Monday it was 70 here, but with the wind it felt like 68.

3
WCS

Does this count?

Lil’ WCS: “I wanna go out and play!”
Me: “You sure? Pretty cold out there.”
Lil’ WCS: “I wanna play!”

/flash forward ten minutes getting kids prepped for outdoors
//about 90 seconds outside

Lil’ WCS: “Daddy, too cold!”
Me: “I told you it would be. Do you want to play inside or outside?”
Lil’ WCS: “Too cold!”
Me: “Thank God for bourbon. Back inside we go.”

2
SonOfSpam

How much bourbon did Lil WCS drink?

4
WCS

Obviously, not enough.

1
Redshirt

(how that conservation went for my childhood)

Lil’ Redshirt: “Mommy, its too cold!”
Momshirt: “Let me see your fingers. You don’t got frostbite. Get back out there.”

1
Redshirt

Just watching Northam’s speech today.

“When I saw the image of my yearbook page, I was shocked and appalled.”

It took him nearly 35 years to realize a picture of a guy in blackface and a KKK Klansman was on his yearbook page?!

“While I didn’t do this picture, I took part in a dancing costume wearing blackface while dressed as Michael Jackson.”

How does that line help you at all in this? You’re supposed to get you head off the gallows, not give the executioner pointers on his swing.

His college nickname was …um…I don’t feel comfortable typing it. It not a profanity, but its definitely derogatory towards African Americans.

How are we finding out now? We’re in an age where nothing is secret. If I ran for Congress, within three days my political enemies will know my first crush, the first porn site I ever visited and the grade I got in 1st Grade Handwriting. How are we just finding out something like this?!

1
rockingdog

dumbass

0
King Hippo

maybe Weird Al will do a parody of this for Gov. Frank Reynolds?

/disclaimer, is really the only Soundgarden tune I didn’t like

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=T0_zzCLLRvE

0
SonOfSpam

“Hey, that was my old nickname too. Oh wait…did you say ‘poonman’?”

– B. Clinton

2
Spur

i love that the other NBA teams have told the Lakers to “go fuck yourself”.

2
Moose -The End Is Well Nigh

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Happy Saturday.

0
rockingdog

A pipe, a beer, and a dog? This dude knows whats up…..

1
King Hippo

Ralph Northam apparently “joked” about how hard it was to get the shoe polish off after his minstrel act. YES, Virginia, your Governor is Frank Reynolds:

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=-0L_oJMhcs0

2
Gratliff

“Yes, it was me.”
“We need you to resign.”
“Wait, no, sorry. Wasn’t me. That was a lie, but not like, a resignation-worthy lie.”
“foh”

1
Gratliff

FFS, they’re doing all the Frozen songs. Why?

0
SonOfSpam

You’re the one who bought a Disney kids’ game. Damn pedo.

2
Gratliff

Kingdom Hearts is 17 years old. Good enough for Seinfeld, good enough for me.

2
SonOfSpam

I KNEW you were a libertarian.

2
King Hippo

Booky book update – currently reading Ken Follett’s “The Century” trilogy, enjoying it very much.

0
Spur

Traction – Gino Wickman. Am working on my management skills.

0
Spur

James Dolan has given NBA fans so much joy. Knicks fans not so much joy.

Still cant get over the KP trade. Which NBA stars in their right mind would willing join that shit show? Durant is going to LOVE IT!

0
Spur

What’s the spread on tomorrow’s Puppy Bowl? Cant seem to find any odds online.

0
SonOfSpam

Newspapers. Because they’ll be SPREAD on the floor. Because of pee. GET IT?

1
Redshirt

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=vJEJFbUt9sg

May have been shared here, but lets relive this once again.

0
Spur

Folks

0
litre_cola

Randy Carlyle could get fired in the intermission tonight. Ducks down 6-0 through 1.

2
WCS

A touchdown, and the PAT, and they’ve got the lead. Nothing to worry about. `

1
Redshirt

No problem. All they gotta do is string some hits together and get his pitch count up. If they can get to the bullpen early, they have a chance at a comeback.

1
Gratliff

Of course, the Frozen world is the only one in Kingdom Hearts with the full musical number because “Let it Go” could really use the exposure

0
King Hippo

TRUE HIPPO FACT! I have never seen Frozen – not one goddamned minute of it.

1
Redshirt

Its worth seeing at least once. You can tell why the song “Let It Go” changed the whole movie and why people call “Frozen” the special edition extended cut to “Let It Go”. Plus, the way they wrote the villain was good.

0
Gratliff

I actually haven’t seen it. Or Tangled, and toy story was 2 or 3 years too late for me, and Monsters, Inc, was closer to my kid’s generation. When they released the first KH 18 years ago (*sobbing noises*), most of the worlds were from my youth (Aladdin, Beauty and the Beast, Nightmare Before Christmas, etc.), now it’s this weird amalgam of my Kingdom Hearts nostalgia and my kid’s Disney/Pixar nostalgia.

0
Brick Meathook

It briefly stopped raining here in Los Angeles (one of our football teams is playing tomorrow) so I went to my local Ralphs and there was a run on the place. Except, it was full of really really old people. Go figure.

4
SonOfSpam

So, more like a walker on the place.

1
WCS

As a veteran of the USAF, I just want to say (type?) Canada’s national anthem is vastly better than the US’s.

2
herodotus450

Well that’s cause a Brit wrote the music smh
https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/John_Stafford_Smith

2
Senor Weaselo

We may have won the Cold War but the Russians do have the better anthem.

2
Redshirt

You cannot watch the crew of the Red October sing “Slav’sya, Otechestvo nashe svobodnoye” and not get filled with pride for the USSR. That is a fact.

1
Redshirt

One, thanks again for your service.

Two, its a poem, not a song.

Honestly, I’d go with America the Beautiful or maybe Battle Cry of Freedom with updated non-Civil War lyrics.

1
WCS

I’m still on board for having MetallicA’s “Master of Puppets” or Slayer’s “Reign in Blood” as our anthem. Maybe The Cars’ “Moving In Stereo.”

2
Redshirt

If we’re doing rock songs, lets look at Absolute Zero by Stone Sour. The kind of fits America as an Anti-Hero.

Or Tired by Stone Sour. That kind of fits America today much better.

0
Moose -The End Is Well Nigh

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1
SonOfSpam

I need to go to Trader Joe’s and load up on unhealthy snack food for tomorrow.

Huh, that’s a pretty white statement right there.

4
litre_cola

Don’t stop by Bed, Bath and Beyond, there has been bad things going down there lately.

2
SonOfSpam

While looking for this video, I discovered that Nickelback covered this song. I gave it about 15 seconds. It’s so bad, I won’t even put it here as a joke. And I’ve gladly posted Rebecca Black’s “Friday” video on this site several times.

Anyway, here’s Elton.

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=NsdNu-VNIrs

3
Beerguyrob

It will sadden you to know then that for 15 years it was the intro to game two of the Hockey Night In Canada broadcast.

0
BrettFavresColonoscopy

Also, always a possible theme with the sport we begrudgingly love:

https://youtube.com/watch?v=EM4vblG6BVQ&feature=youtu.be

1
herodotus450

In case the NFL ever converts to Judaism
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=yuVmjv22Nqc

2
SonOfSpam

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=GPo9OBrIOi4

4
BrettFavresColonoscopy

I will not give the NFL my eyeballs on a bullshit honors show. But Atwater is my favorite on that list.

0
Moose -The End Is Well Nigh

According to the radio people he didn’t make it; Mr. B and Champ made it.

0
litre_cola

Goes to bet on Super Bowl, is distracted by live betting Bermudian futbol.

1
Moose -The End Is Well Nigh

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1
Moose -The End Is Well Nigh

Missile to the Moon (1958)

0
Moose -The End Is Well Nigh

Missiles?

1
SonOfSpam

I’d let her put her missile in my moon. Wait. No, that’s right.

3
Moose -The End Is Well Nigh

Pegged it!

-Not Blair Walsh (maybe; his wife IS pretty hot)

3
SonOfSpam

(I wonder how many times he’s missed the target in bed)

1
Moose -The End Is Well Nigh

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Get ready for the big game.

2
Moose -The End Is Well Nigh

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Moose -The End Is Well Nigh

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