INT. ELI MANNING’S BEDROOM – NIGHT
DANIEL JONES removes the set of earplugs that ELI MANNING had provided him with.
DANIEL: Hey, that was pretty boss!
ELI: [wary of sarcasm] Really?
DANIEL: [seemingly genuine] Yeah man, totally.
ELI: [smiles bashfully] Yeah, I guess it’s pretty cool.
DANIEL: [points to the speakers attached to ELI’s computer] Let’s crank it up some of that Bow Wow Wow and shake the foundations.
ELI: [considers, then shakes his head] Nah, I don’t want to deal with that kind of heat from Mo…I mean Olivia. Especially on book club night.
DANIEL: Well speaking of candy, man…[makes exaggerated sniffing noise, then raises eyebrows]…do you like to party?
ELI: What do you mean?
DANIEL looks around conspiratorially, then opens up his duffel bag and begins laying items out onto Eli’s desk.
ELI: Holy sh…ugar!
DANIEL: As soon as they called my name on April 25th, I said to myself “Daniel, it’s time to turn your drug problem into a drug collection.” Sweet, right? That’s like one-third of my signing bonus right there.
ELI: [very, very nervously] Listen, man, I don’t want you to think I’m a narc or anything, but…I’m really not into that stuff.
DANIEL: Huh. Kind of feels like you don’t trust me, man.
ELI: No, no, it’s not that. It’s just that, you know, the NFL’s drug testing policy…
DANIEL: You already got tested though, right?
ELI nods.
DANIEL: What, you think I brought a shitload of drugs along just to get you popped and suspended by the NFL so I could take over the starting spot? That’s not what I’m about, man. Here, let me show you that I’m on the level. [points to drug collection] Pick something at random. Anything you want.
ELI: I don’t want to do drugs, Daniel.
DANIEL: You’re not doing drugs, I’m doing drugs. Just pick something.
ELI swallows and pokes his finger down over one of the various bags.
DANIEL: [eyes widen] Holy shit, this Eli the Barrow Boy character rolls hard. Fucking sweet, man, I’ll hit it.
DANIEL takes a capsule from the baggie, opens it up and dumps the powder into the crook of his thumb, then with a single gulping huff snorts the entire amount.
DANIEL: It’s gonna be a little bit before this really starts to hit – you got a Playstation we can jam on while we’re waiting?
ELI: I got a Sega Genesis.
DANIEL: Cool, cool. [reaches back into the duffel bag, pulls out a mylar zip-lock bag while concealing the label from ELI, and dumps its contents into his hands] And here, man. I don’t want you getting left behind, so how about a good old-fashioned sugar rush to keep you on pace with me?
—
Note: Today’s topic is DRUGS. Specifically, drugs that DANIEL JONES would be into, though if you’ve got your own proclivities that’s fine too. This is probably the richest topic in Request Line history, so the limit is FIVE songs per person. So make ’em count. I’ll get us started with one of the greatest odes to a substance ever recorded.
I know!
Let’s have a TRIPLE shot!
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Bq7lf3-zgfE
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=rPMsaxqiL5Q
AND!
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=yqIsh9Vdnuc
Golly gee. I wonder if this fits the given theme.
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=AjQ4U-3FNrw
Is “The War on Drugs” too obvious?
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Y5DzTaYakLo
Okay, rounding it up for me:
1. Heroin: Velvet Underground – “Heroin”
2. Cocaine: Steve Marriott – “Cocaine”
3. Marijuana: Bob Marley – “Ganja Gun”
4. LSD: Beatles – “It’s All Too Much”
5. Ecstasy: Fatboy Slim – “Song for Shelter”
Yep, that’s a good day’s work.
5. MDMA (Ecstasy). I never got too deeply involved in the rave scene, but I like Fatboy Slim and I like this song even without the influence of drugs, so I’d probably like it even more if I were getting freaky on the E.
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=czFuhFyPQrE
5a. In conclusion, a remake
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=vt1Pwfnh5pc
5b. And the original (which I kinda think is better live)
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=KR4DjYczINM
4. If you watch this video carefully, you may see people who are high.
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Vl89g2SwMh4
4. A little Sabbath, anyone?
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=l5_eoB7v5R8
3. Some good old 60s psychedelia. Sung by Kenny Rogers. Wait…what?
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=h77jpjFYOSM
And now, the only song about drugs that Mo- err.. Olivia will let him listen to.
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=h9nE2spOw_o
A classic from my hard partying days.
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=4MtdpNdNpKs
And hard partying can only mean one thing:
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=WccfbPQNMbg
If ever you walk the tunnels underneath Carleton U, you will eventually pass by a several years painted-over mural of the Silver Surfer inserting heroin into his arm. That was my floor (First Russell!) that did that.
2. Sure, Rivers, long as you’re buying
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=h_Wu6lI-42w
4. Lysergic Acid Diethylamide. In reaching into the Beatles catalog, most folks would go for the obvious choice. Not yours truly. This song was the theme for an acid trip I took during Spring Break my junior year of college, something I also refer to as the Ice Cream Trip (I don’t know why).
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=2zc3idF_IZ0
1. Terrific value at this point in the draft
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Hd3oqvnDKQk
Yep, if not for the Velvet Underground this would have been my heroin song.
Hallucinogenics seem vastly under represented here, so for my final choice:
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=sESRg-f9MkU
#3 go hard. And for some reason i likey this song.
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=oSPT27XyY1U
If you’ve ever dated a truly crazy girl…
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=hCd28zYZzBg
#2 when you need more to get your fix
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=jryzEU7WAlg
Whoops? Let me know what the pick was meant to be and I’ll edit it for you.
thanks, supposed to be this, copy + paste fail
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=jryzEU7WAlg
Probably because you’re on drugs.
shhhhhhhhh. Hippo will want me to share again
#1 Drugged in general?
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=bm51ihfi1p4
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=PxH8W5DIT1A
A fun summer song about running coke.
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=w5TqNf9zDOw
I am SHOCKED this is still on the board.
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=XvDZuptvupk
You can’t be shocked that *anything* is on the board – it’s just soooooo broad of a topic.
In BOLTMAN speak, “SHOCKED” is a synonym for “CHARRRRGGGGEEEDDD UP!”
Rush: A Passage to Bangkok
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=9LV-IDbU0lA
Meh, screw it. RTD can punch me in a couple weeks for breaking his rules if he wants to….
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=WeYsTmIzjkw
Ask and ye shall receive tWBS. Final pick
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=5QCaaAyz-yA
Wait, isn’t it called “The Next Episode”?
If no one posts anything by Snoop I’m going to be very upset,
How about Snoop and Willie Nelson together?
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=CyBOpsF4ASo
LOL, Inorite?
Metallica: Master of Puppets
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=xVR4bkyMykA&has_verified=1
3. Since “Smoke Two Joints” is off the board, I’m going to turn to Bob Marley to help me round out my collection a bit.
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=RBjPZfyO0as
Well-played.
The Offspring: Mota (subtitles be damned)
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=vF57TEOdLjA
For my last choice, I’ll pick this song, as its drug references are very subtle:
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=eMK4cfXj5c0
Fine, since RTD is being selfish I guess this is my last entry.
I am NOT happy!!!!!!
LOL
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=h0i62GnQoo0
If it makes you happy I had the Toyes version of that song on my board with a fourth round grade. YOU STOLE MY PICK!
Here’s one drug Eli and Daniel have probably done.
Novocaine – Beck
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=S2whdGwK84Y
Ooh, you just gave me an idea for how Daniel is going to get Eli on board for something in Volume 3.
3. Just One Fix – Ministry
(sorry yeah right)
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=XYYGKCanqfA
GnR: Mr Brownstone
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=LXkvbcwIzJo
2. Sister Morphine – The Rolling Stones
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=C39kQoprfP0
#4 There are A LOT of songs about cocaine.
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=h_j_48G2L_o
I read a fun book called Snowblind that was about cocaine smuggling.
1, Ween – Bananas and Blow
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=6Gd87JmkAkE
Skynard: That Smell
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=hib4n9RmFrQ
Nice. And we’ll double that up easily.
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=1b_CqeyKWYg
@RTD….I am petitioning that this doesn’t count against my total of five because I’m only posting it to screw with SoS.
I will await your judgement on that….
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=KAdRPrXdXTU
I don’t even know what to say.
LOL
You think Roger Goodell would allow a “joke” pick to be turned in on someone’s card? No way, man. It totally counts.
Boooooo!!!!!!!
Joke’s on you my friend. Their early work was a little too new wave for my tastes, but when Sports came out in ’83, I think they really came into their own, commercially and artistically. The whole album has a clear, crisp sound, and a new sheen of consummate professionalism that really gives the songs a big boost. He’s been compared to Elvis Costello, but I think Huey has a far more bitter, cynical sense of humour.
Another obvious choice: Clapton’s Cocaine
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=fdDhV45lYHU
Off the board already.
2. Steve Marriott – “Cocaine”
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=AySqH8v2e1o
#3
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=3bEUaeG4wH4
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=u0u_qxFEysI
#2
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=3zWVEGRbKxg
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=wDNHE6fTUn8
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=5qHNQxZGZKU
Let’s get the obvious one out of the way:
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=hCjBnzNlCAM
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=gjdLAsnR_Ws
And the first player off the board comes from Meth University!
Most cheery song about meth addiction ever recorded.
Somewhere, King Hippo is jumping for joy right now.