Your LaboUr Day Evening Open Thread

Like most of you, I’m wrapping up the three-day weekend in advance of resuming life as a teacher on Tuesday.

And I am not taking it well.

But a new school year will bring new students, returning headaches, fresh challenges, and it’s eventual completion brings me one satisfying year closer to full retirement.

So I trundle on, hoping I can get through to some, and help the others get on the way to their future.


Tonight’s sports:

  • NCAA:
    • Notre Dame at Louisville – 8:00PM | ESPN / TSN
  • U.S. Open Tennis:
    • Round of 16 – 7:00PM | ESPN2 / TSN2
  • MLB:
    • White Sox at Cleveland – 7:00PM | Sportsnet / MLBN
  •  WWE:
    • Monday Night Raw – 8:00PM | USA / Sportsnet360
      • The road to the Wednesday Night Wars begins tonight!

This is also my last Monday for a while, as football takes over my slot. I’ll be back in February to spin those classic rock tunes you love so much. Until then,

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Beerguyrob
A Canadian man-child of indeterminate age, he stays young by selling alcohol at sporting events and yelling at the patrons he serves. Their rage nourishes his soul, and their tips pay for his numerous trips to various sporting events.
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Unsurprised

Oh, come on!

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BrettFavresColonoscopy

On the DFO suicide pool–did I sign up? I can’t find an email confirmation and am on tilt.

Col. Duke LaCross

I think if you go to ESPN’s app, it’s still loaded in from last year. You just have to hit “rejoin.”

Mr. Ayo

That worked. Woot!

Brick Meathook

Doh!

BrettFavresColonoscopy

Just got back to LA, got in the Lyft, the driver asked where we were coming from, and I legit couldn’t remember. Fuck.

Brick Meathook

Maybe . . . you never left.

King Hippo

#RememberSammyJankis

Rikki-Tikki-Deadly

That sounds like the beginning of a Jason Bourne movie.

The Bourne Colonoscopy.

blaxabbath

I’m done tipping at the register before my order arrives. I have never ONCE had an above-average experience when tipping at the time of order; however, I’ve been left to hang out like any other chump who didn’t just throw his money away like an idiot many a time.

Brocky

Rover spot in football. Havent heard that term since my high school days

Redshirt

This may be the first time a Cupcake Game is played at the Cupcake’s place.

Gratliff

Completely ignored the post until this very moment. As IT in education, my least favorite part is when the teachers come back. I love when teachers make requests like “Make all the student passwords the same because it’s easier that way and doesn’t confuse the kids” when every student over the age of 9 has 2FA enabled on their google accounts and uses KeePass and shit while I have to reset the teacher’s email password 5 times the first day, but y’know, make it easy for the kids.

Unsurprised

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Brick Meathook

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Mr. Ayo

Nailed It!

Brick Meathook

That’s high school all-star DeSean Jackson showing off his signature “premature touchdown celebration fumble” move that he brought to the NFL.

Gratliff

What’s the O/U on destructive fire references in regards to Notre Dame this season/week/thread?

Unsurprised

How about we call it a wash and just set UND and South Bend on fire?

Brocky

Why the fuck does it feel every single notre dame game feels like they’d lose if they faced just marginally better coaching?

Unsurprised

Because it’s true

King Hippo

Survivor and Loser pool thoughts? Can’t get around THAT aspect of Week 1.

So far I like Balmer to win (v. fuck you Dolphin!) and Redacteds to lose (@ Iggles)

Mr. Ayo

Nevah bet against early season Fitzmagic. Give me pre-femur drum Spanos clan.

King Hippo

he gon’ die, though. I’m not sure we’ve seen a worse OL in 10+ years.

yeah right

Betting against Miami seems the safest strategy so far.
I’m gonna ride that dolphin.

Fronkenshteen

Jesus. That guy looked like a dog that got hit by a car.

Redshirt

Point of Order: Was that a typo and he looks like his dog was hit by the car or is that correct as written and he looks like the dog hit by the car?

King Hippo

and either way, did ya fap to it?

Redshirt

Good grief. Is Louisville allergic to success?

King Hippo

I assure you that such would be against Commissioner Swofford’s (East Coast Disgrace) script for the evening. It must be DABO!! Irish!! and fuckall else

Unsurprised

How to Make Enemies and Alienate Friends: Labor Day Edition

King Hippo

yeah, by NAWT spelling “LaboUr” the DFO way 😀

litre_cola

So many fumbles

Redshirt

Unsanctioned DFO Fake or For Real Poll:

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Mr. Ayo

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Redshirt

Trump doesn’t understand how climate works? I am shock.

Rikki-Tikki-Deadly

Thank God the people of Alabama can finally rest easy tonight.

herodotus450

This is the ultimate “not sure if one team is surprisingly bad or if the other is surprisingly good” game

Mr. Ayo

This game is a great reminder why not to bet on collegiate sprots.

WCS

“BLASPHEMY!”

— King H., North Carolina

Mr. Ayo

I hope he’s currently betting the 2nd half under.

King Hippo

I didn’t say NOT BET – some very lively 2nd division Lesser Footy to live bet

King Hippo

Week 1 JV is just insanely difficult. Why I only bet two ML upsets (Nevada, Wyoming) because the odds were great (huzzah, both hit) and the o/u on Ducks/War Damn Eagle (because I was bored, it failed like usual).

No #ACTION on Week 1 NFL so far.

herodotus450

Dammit, I made a prop bet for four consecutive fumbles leading to turnovers.

Brocky

Damn it

WCS

YOU GET A FUMBLE! AND YOU GET A FUMBLE! AND YOU GET A FUMBLE!

Mr. Ayo

Up top bro!

WCS

Great minds and such and such

Brick Meathook

I like to imagine that you’re both lying in bed together watching TV, each with your own iPad.

Mr. Ayo

There’s a spot in between us if you’d just ask.

Brick Meathook

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Mr. Ayo

YOU GET A FUMBLE, YOU GET A FUMBLE, YOU GET A FUMBLE…

herodotus450

“Independent Ball Movement,” usually not a good thing

WCS

3rd and 27? JV NFL BLITZ!

Brocky

I’m pretty sure a parking guy does that you’re legally allowed to murder him

Senor Weaselo

“Yeah, but he has a home and a family.” -Scotchy

Unsurprised

For now.

LemonJello

I HAVEN’T SEEN THE IRISH GETTING GASHED LIKE THIS SINCE EDWARD LONGSHANKS REINSTATED PRIMAE NOCTIS.

LemonJello

Coach Kelly is gonna have a bunch of video assistants nervously eyeing weather reports for this week’s practices.

King Hippo

BANNER!!

Brocky

Stumbled across this gem yesterday:
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Rikki-Tikki-Deadly

I couldn’t think of anything good so I named my FF team the Virtue Signalers and used an image of Mike Pence as my avatar.

Brocky

Pretty good. Could have just went with “calls his wife mother”

Senor Weaselo

I have Cam and Robby Anderson so I just butchered a Crash Team Racing joke.

Rikki-Tikki-Deadly

But a new school year will bring new students…

Class after class of ugly ones, right?

Rikki-Tikki-Deadly
rockingdog

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LemonJello

This alternate ending where Rocket saves the universe from Thanos sucks.

rockingdog

found a funny:
[presses every button in elevator and looks at the girl next to me] what’s your favorite bread

Brocky

…….. i don’t get it

LemonJello

Hopefully unlike my prom night, the Cardinals haven’t shot their wad too early…

herodotus450

Louisville looking veritably English the way they’re cutting through this Irish defense.

herodotus450

Would also have accepted a comparison to ammonium nitrate for the way they’re blowing up the Irish.

Gratliff

Oo. Starz has the new Broly movie. Gonna watch that instead.
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Brocky

Stupid question, i haven’t watched any of super, or the other the two new movies, people tell me i need to see this, does seeing either of the previous ones matter?

Gratliff

None of the Broly movies are canon, so they did a complete reboot to bring him into the storyline proper. So far, it’s pretty killer. You’ll be lost if you don’t watch Super, though. Super was fantastic, and includes all the stories from Battle of the Gods and Resurrection F, so you don’t have to watch the previous movies. Goku vs. Jiren during the last arc of super is among the best in all the series.

yeah right

A grilled Nathan’s, toasted bun and spicy brown mustard with a cold ass beer?

That’ll do.

LemonJello

Is it really an upgrade to go from Happy Appy to Louisville?

King Hippo

the line is like 36 on this, so…NO

herodotus450

The meth is worse, but the opiods are probably better. So it’s a push.

WCS

Nothing says NCAA like having two teams risk their well-being playing for free for the rest of our entertainment on Labor Day. That said, fuck Notre Dame with a crowbar.

Gratliff

Which documentary should I watch tonight? JFK or Hilary’s America?

King Hippo

JFK is a vastly overrated, inconsequential President. And why the fuck would ANYONE want to watch ANYTHING HillyBob related at this point in time?

herodotus450

/Googles “book depositories near Hippo”

King Hippo

however, “Thirteen Days” is most excellent.

Gratliff

The point was that JFK is a batshit insane conspiracy movie (albeit very watchable) and Hilary’s America is a hit piece created by a dipshit conservative grifter and felon.

King Hippo

oh, I miss joke! Don’t mind me, I been up since 4a.

It is amusing how the right-wing conspiracy hive mind spun these stupefyingly complex Machievellan narratives around basically the most boring politician of the 21st century.

Gratliff

I wouldn’t say the JFK theories like what’s portrayed in the movie were conservative. I knew plenty of liberals (albeit older ones who probably were closer to Reagan than any current Dems) who swore by the belief that LBJ had JFK killed.

King Hippo

I meant HillyBob’s!

and yeah, those JFK conspiracies are pretty interesting

King Hippo

/also LBJ hisself apparently believed until his own death “I think the Cubans got him” – despite public allegiance to the Warren Report

Brocky

13 days was a good film. Underrated

King Hippo

so good I didn’t even mind Kevin Costner. That much.

rockingdog
King Hippo

I ask FOAR the ppls’ grading of Bleached Assholes:

QB: C. Newton ($8), Bollo del Verdad ($3), Flacco ($1)

Hippo: Newton at that price point seemed worth the gamble, but FUUUUCKKKK both Janeane Garofolo ($2) and DAK! ($1) would have been even cheaper if I had not taken the bait.

RB: D. Johnson ($60), J. Mixon ($50 – Keeper), T. Cohen ($7), Darwin Thompson ($4), A. Mattison ($3), James Jackson ($2), K. Ballage ($2)

Hippo: I like all my depth/upside/keeper potential plays, but I should have planned better for a more reliable #4.

WR: D. Hopkins ($59 – keeper), B. Cooks ($16), K. Holladay ($10), Corey Davis ($4), J. “Bleeding Kansas” Brown ($1)

Hippo: Cooks is a steal at that price, even if I am meh on RRRRRRRRRRRAM IT!! this season. I should probably feel better about Holladay than I do, I wanted the security blanket of JEWKAH! but he went for a crazy amount (like $28).

TE: O. Howard ($14), D. Goeddert ($2)

Hippo: /invests heavily in Zach Ertz voodoo doll futures.

K: J. Slye ($1)

Hippo: High distance bonuses this league, otherwise who fucking cares.

Def: 500s ($2), Non-Gendered Cowpersons ($1)

Hippo: Great, my lead unit is imaginary. Also PHRASING.

I am irrationally proud that my suggestion to shift to 0.8 PPR was accepted by the commish. Having played both full and half PPR, I think full is better, but not overwhelmingly so. Thus, 0.8.

herodotus450

I think you’ll be waiting for Goeddert to score points all season
/No idea who that is

King Hippo

oh, that’s GOOD

Don T

Decimals are the spice of life

rockingdog

found a funny:
[after sex]

Her: was…was that your first time?

Me: no of course not

Her: you shouted “yay this is fun” like eight times

Me: *unwrapping a jolly rancher* well I noticed you said it zero times

scotchnaut

Nadal is the purple-clad tennis hero that no one ever asked for.

Fronkenshteen

Thanks for all your hard work, sir! Have a wonderful school year and may no one get shootsed.

herodotus450

Someone send BGR the community bullet proof vest. You can’t prove those stains are from me!

Game Time Decision

The stains on the haiwiian shirt make it practically bulletproof, he’s good

King Hippo

I think he teaches in Canadia, those cucks don’t even believe in the Second Amendment ,, smgdh