I’m in a really bad mood. Fair warning for what you are about to read. Close your browser now if you don’t have the stomach for it.
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I love women. I mean not like that. Well not ONLY like that. I mean…. NO YOU SHUT UP.
What I’m about to type out? This might come across as odd sounding, all things considered. But I’m going to say it anyway.
A strong and intelligent woman is about the best thing in life any man can find. Some of us do find the woman who can tether us to life. That’s a good thing. Some of us never do, in spite of trying very hard to find her. Life, and especially romance, is more or less a crapshoot. Sometimes you win. Sometimes you do not.
As many of you know, a little over a year ago I thought I’d found “The One”. I’m referring to the former tWLS in case that wasn’t clear.
She currently lives in Sarasota, Florida. She moved to Florida to take care of her father who was dying of Non-Hodgkins Lymphoma. She’s still there now taking care of her mother.
She and I were friends in Maryland during our High School years. Then we “reconnected”, as more than friends, about a year and a half ago. Many of you already know that part of the story. No worries.
She’s smart. In her own way, she’s tough. I fully admire her for having pulled up stakes in Maryland and going to Florida to care for her parents. I mean that. A few years ago I did much the same thing myself actually. Still am.
And when she and I reconnected she needed some help. Her house in Maryland was…. Well let’s say it hadn’t been well maintained for a coupla years because she was away dealing with life in Florida.
I got that house fixed. Both from my own blood, sweat and tears, and out of my own pocket when needed. Because she couldn’t afford to do it. Long story there and I won’t go into the details. If you want more details, go here. But don’t get your hopes up because I have no intention of revealing all of it.
But my point is this…
She’s a good person. Actually, I’d call her a great person all things considered. What she’s overcome and what she’s done for her family? Wow, just wow.
I loved her. Still do honestly. And I did everything I could to show her that. To show her that I cared and wanted to be there for her in whatever way needed. But she wasn’t available. As I’ve often said, and I’m sure I will again, my timing has always sucked. Just a fact of tWBS’ life. I’m used to it by now.
Things with she and I did not turn out well. Obvs. But I don’t think badly of her for that, even though I think she likely thinks badly of me. Again, long story there and no details forthcoming on that.
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I was supposed to be going down to Florida next week for Grapefruit League Spring Training.
I already had tickets for the Orioles vs both the Blue Jays and the Pirates. Was also gonna try to catch the Twins vs Yanks on my out of town. But sadly, it didn’t work out. Yesterday I had to cancel the entire trip foar reasons. And I had to eat the cost of the tickets for both O’s vs Jays and O’s vs Pirates.
Not a big deal there. The cost of my cancelled flights were able to be credited to my account (California will be cheaper to get to next time, LOL), and for this trip to Florida, both the hotel and rental car were fully cancelled. Fully refunded.
But here’s the thing…
The former tWLS is also a yuuuuuuge Baseball/Orioles’ fan. We both grew up in a Baltimore Suburb. So it’s not surprising. But the fact that she now resides in the Orioles’ Spring Training home is a little ironic. At least I think so.
I just would like to know why she hates me so.
The last time I saw her was late summer last year. I drove up to Baltimore to try to help her with some of the things she was dealing with. Nothing romantic at that point. Any thoughts of an ongoing romance was WAYYYYY done by then. I was just trying to be a friend.
But when you are trying to be a friend and the other person shouts out….JUST GET OUT….GET THE FUCK OUT!!!! (direct quote)
Well, it’s time for you get the fuck out. Which is what I did. Post Haste (which means “really damned fast”).
When she and I ended the romance, which was the right thing to do, I still continued to try to communicate and try to foster an ongoing friendship. It did not go well.
But, perhaps stupidly of me, when I planned my trip to Sarasota for Spring training, I tried again. Tried to foster a friendship, that is.
tWBS: No strings. I’ll be down for Spring Training in a few months. I’d like it if we could get together for lunch or dinner. Or if you wanted to go to one of the games? It would be nice to see you and to see your mom.
The Former tWLS: Nope, but thanks for asking.
So, how does one respond to that?
Exactly. There is no good response to that. So, I did not respond. That seemed the best choice for everyone involved.
Fast forward to two days ago, when I realized I needed to cancel my trip for other reasons. Well….. I don’t know anyone else in Sarasota. I did try to give my tickets away to other Orioles’ fans who might be able to make the trip, but none could pull it off on short notice.
So guess what my stupid ass did?
Yep, you guessed it. I texted the former tWLS and offered her the tix, FOC. The tickets weren’t refundable for me. I was gonna eat the cost one way or another. I thought long and hard (lol) about whether to approach her. But I finally decided to. And honestly, I expected her to either tell me to fuck off, or just not respond at all.
Wrong.
Turns out she was absolutely willing to take the free tickets and find a way to go to the games.
Just not with me.
As I already said earlier, she’s a wonderful human being in so many ways. I’ve seen how good a person she is, in spite of some shortcomings. I’ve seen how great she could be. She’s smart. She’s attractive. She’s not perfect, nor am I.
But then again I was never looking for perfection. And that might be the problem. I always accepted her (and anyone else I’ve ever been with) for who they really were. Not necessarily who they wanted to be. And I thought she accepted me the same way. Until she didn’t.
We all want to be better than who we are. We’re not. On a few occasions she asked me questions about what I believed about her. Yep, you guessed it. In spite of my beliefs about being honest with whomever I’m involved with…. Welp, I should kept my fucking mouth shut.
Most people don’t really want to hear the truth. Even if you try to sugar coat it one way or another.
–
Anywhooooo…
This is my point I guess…
I met a very nice young lady a couple of weeks ago. Here locally to me. She seemed nice. Intelligent. Attractive. She’s in my same professional field.
And because of all of what I’ve just told you all about above up there? Nope, I just couldn’t. Just couldn’t take the chance again.
And that really fucking sucks.
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It’s International Women’s Day this weekend. That happens on Sunday.
Don’t be like me. If you get the chance, take it.
Hmmmm….I’d like the chance to influence her.
But I digress…
Most of the people in my life who have influenced me positively? They’ve been women. Strong women. Women who had confidence in themselves. And I think that’s a wonderful thing.
I’m just not good at the romance-y type stuff I guess. Dunno why. But I am the common denominator.
Eventually we have to accept that. Even if I don’t fully understand why, I’m the problem somehow. So better to remove meself from the equation, drink a shitload of vodka, and try not to piss the bed.
CHEERS!!!!!!!
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Sports Which Will Kill Your Libido 2Nite
NBA
- Miami @ New Orleans – 8:00pmEST – TV: ESPN
- Milwaukee @ LAL – 10:30PMEST – TV: ESPN
NHL
- Chixxxx @ Detroit – 8:00pmEST – TV: NHLN
NCAA BB
- Buffalo @ Bowling Green – 6:00pmEST – TV: ESPNU
- Kent State @ Akron – 6:30pmEST – CBSSN
- Wake Forest @ NC State – 7:00pmEST – ACCN
- Georgia Tech @ Clemson – 7:00pmEST – ESPN2
- Eastern Kentucky @ Belmont – 8:00pmEST – TV: ESPNU
- Boise State @ (5)San Diego State – 9:00pmEST – TV: CBSSN
- VCU @ Davidson – 9:00pmEST – TV: ESPN2
- Austin Peay @ Murray State – 10:00pmEST – TV: ESPNU
- Wyoming @ Utah State – 11:30pmEST – TV: CBSSN
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Smart Girls…They’ll Kill Ya
That’s just a joke. Probably.
Enjoy…
That looks like a good book. Don’t you think?
I include this only for the irony. Last name “Slaughter”.
I’m sure she’s actually a lovely person
/hides knives and firearms
Have a great weekend everyone.
And don’t be like me. Go find the one you could love. Just make sure she’s smart enough to appreciate you. But not so smart that she’ll murderize you for being an idiot.
Love ya’s.
OK, sincerely, my apologies for that one.
But it’s funny.
–
Damn. I liked the peek under the curtains. Those ladies can really cut deep when they want. I think I’d like to just crush down feelings inside and keep a hold on them. But if you spend any time thinking they just pop out anywhere they can.
I guess even the worst bad stuff is better than feeling nothing. You have the one go at life and after that you won’t get to feel anything at all. Or at least they’ll charge a fee.
Give me the soma already.
Oh, yeah; happy Friday Cunts and Cuntesses!
I suddenly feel kooky.
I have deep feelings!
Is the cunt or the cuntess the man? It’s the cuntess, right?
Like The Countess, but with less property.
I started playing bass when I was a fucking kid,
Stand up bass with a bow.
Eldest granddaughter is playing electric bass for stage band and the girl can play.
Every time we get together we play music.
She’s so much better than me.
To be able to pass on the music?
Priceless.
How did I turn out goth?
Oh yeah.
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=sILbx5xbwPY
Dude.
Baked.
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=aMnaa__JZbU
OK, I’m officially now planning my suicide after getting this email from facebook.
COME ON MAN!!!!!
Disabled Globally? What the fuck does that even mean?
The question you really should be asking is why in the hell are you on Facebook.
That’s a damn good question.
Can I buy any of you sailors a drink?
/wink wink say no more
I have a handful of friends, real life friends that is, who have gotten to a point where they don’t know how to communicate other than on facebook. It’s the world we live in. I sign on there maybe once every week or two and check in with them, etc. I do not hang around on facebook, and I do not collect “facebook” friends.
But I still get these weird emails. As I said, the world we live in.
Facebook Dating is listening to you.
Evening. I’m still alive.
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=qU7D4K9gFJs
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=y8rBC6GCUjg
Are the Canucks’ hockey talkin’ guys the worst in all of sprots? These 6 glasses of whiskey say: yes.
BAWSTAHN IS WARSE NO ONE DENIES THIS
Oh my God this. I fucking hate that crew
Fuuuuuck Jack Edwards
Nah I like them. Short house and Garrett you mean?
TV or radio? Because I had an audition to replace the radio guy at his old job.
Grey’s Anatomy is using a soulful cover of “Shiny Happy People.” This is surreal.
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=n0Br6744Sl8
It’s a clip show, too. Why am I not blackout drunk?
I said creepy covers!
Why do you think I’m publicly making a note of this?
So does Spike get to go or what?
Only through the VIP entrance!
ALL A CHINESE HOAX BELIEVE ME FOLKS NO ONE KNOWS DISEASES BETTER THAN ME
Get out of my head!
Pro tip to all the pedants out there: it’s Daylight Saving Time, with no ‘s’, in case you want to impress your friends.
I’m savings the link to this post
Like 1-800-Mattres?
1-877-KARS FOR KIDZ THAT’S 877-KARS-4-KIDZ
I’m not Canadian or anything but hte Avalanche look really good this year
Ice Bombers beat the Ice Raiders soundly tonight. Just giving me that bit of hope….
Minnersota’s in the second wild card? What the fuck? Did they just bore the rest of the conference to death?
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=n_rATyEiOrw
Watching The Shining (not The Shinning) on BBC America.
So you wanna get sued, boy?
“(California will be cheaper to get to next time, LOL)”
I feel like there’s a great television show to be written about a veterinarian who moves to Malibu and deals with the flaky rich pet owners he encounters while trying to find love again. Sort of “All Creatures Great and Small” meets … uh, fuck it, I don’t know, “Sex In the City”?
They made a police procedural where the title protagonist is literally the devil.
It was based off a comic so that makes it better?
“We’re listening…” – sleazy Hollywood producers DTZM and RTD
It’s called “Love’s A Bitch”
It’s basically The Love Boat but with adorable animals? I wasn’t really joking before but now I’m *definitely* not joking.
Now I’m up to the beef squashing episode. I don’t know if Always Sunny ever had a real down season. Literally, the first might have been the worst of the bunch.
I couldn’t get past the first season. I thought I was good with comedies with unlikeable protaganists, but Sunny just always seemed a little much on that front.
Then again, it took me two or three tries to enjoy Curb Your Enthusiasm.
It really took DeVito joining the cast (holy shit, he’s been doing this for 14 years. What a legend.) and pushing them past the normal unlikeable to just cartoonishly horrible for people to really enjoy how fucking terrible they are
That’s the case with my wife. She just hates the gang so much that she can’t find them funny.
I love how Jimmi Simpson went from IASIP to a very serious dramatic role in Westworld.
Both pale in comparison to him stealing every scene in black mirror.
Up to the Lethal Weapon 6 episode of Always Sunny and remembering how much I loved Jet Li
Soooooo, I have some opinions on the tWBS love drama. But, I’ll keep them to myself.
I just want to say that no one should ever give up on love.
Never.
No one who isn’t a Republican congressman should ever give up on love.
You disappoint me. I was expecting to catch more shit from you than that.
Nah, you don’t need me to talk shit. I love you and I want you to be happy.
Oh baby, baby. I’ve got 2/3’rds of my next California flight paid for.
You hold the date, and then give me the happy ending.
Too Soon?
WILL YOU TWO JUST BANG ALREADY? (Which, incidentally, Balls would then search on insert porn engine here.)
Here’s a fun game to play: set all your clocks back tonight, then you have an extra day to adjust/not go to social obligations.
Or forward, I guess.
The local news told me tonight that I should eat dinner an hour earlier tonight and tomorrow so I don’t have a heart attack or a stroke on Sunday.
No, I am not making this up. They actually said that.
Funniest part is I’d welcome a stroke right now.
Done.
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=P7gMkiOPSeA
There’s, supposedly, very clear and obvious evidence of excess deaths on the monday after DST starts. Heart attacks and car accidents I think.
Look, there has to be a line for natural selection and I feel like “Death by spring forward” is a good place for it
It’s like Spring Cleaning, but for the old and infirm!
Soylent Green is people!
Sorry – when I read that Seamus needed some Asia, this is where my mind went.
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=xDpPoytXVvo
Or, a more sedate Aja if that better suits your mood.
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=D-FMrz7OwLo
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=HEkerSi5Fig
Well sure, if you want to kill him.
Thinking about how Tom Steyer spent 200 million just so he could meet Bernie Sanders and Juvenile
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=T4W8hdegL3g
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=90yjFiCIxqw
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=0bYY8m1Lb2I
My sister married a guy who had been married 4 times before. Everyone tried to talk her out of it-including him. But she was determined, and they have been happily married for 35 years. My point, dear Seamus, is that maybe you just haven’t found the right one yet, but you shouldn’t completely rule out the possibility that you still may. I hope you do!
Thank you, Love. You are a very sweet thoughtful person and I’m very happy to know we have you in our midst. I can’t overstate that enough.
But sometimes the sunk cost fallacy becomes an issue. As sad as it might sound, I’m just done.
You need some Asia.
Take that as you will….
You too are also a very sweet and thoughtful person, you sexy thang.
But there is no future for Asia and myself.
3000 miles is a lot of miles. By the time I get things tied up here and get to California, if it ever happens of course, she’ll have moved on. As well she should.
But she’s still 24 years younger than meself. Yes, I’m still kinda proud and had to get that one in one last time.
New game: tWBS or R. Kelly?
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=icmGdLkESwQ
And to be clear, I’m old enough that 24 yrs younger than myself is both legal, and fucking impressive.
Artist interpretation of me walking on a car lot looking for a car to buy (first 10 seconds)
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=X3i0kGcmGRU
“…It’s a ring toss game.”
That’s one expensive ring toss game.