Well, we’ve survived another weekend. Life & society has, for the most part, adapted to the changes brought about. One of the larger microbreweries in Vancouver – Parallel 49 – has started making hand sanitizer from their excess ethyl alcohol during their beer production.
Due to a shortage of plastic bottles, it’s being both canned & refilled into existing pump bottles. There’s no word if you can go down & get a growler full for individual use. It’s a noble way to keep your name in the news and increase foot traffic to the facility during the Bad Times. It’s certainly a different approach than New York, which is using prison labour to help produce the product.
Today’s internet good dog is Louie, a Golden Retriever who wants to go for a walk.
https://twitter.com/Kiaz19/status/1243068535896760321
Tonight’s … entertainment?:
- WWE WrestleMania 32: From Arlington, Texas – 7:00 PM | ESPN
- WWE stars collide on “The Grandest Stage of Them All” in Arlington, Texas. Matches include Triple H vs. Roman Reigns; Dean Ambrose vs. Brock Lesnar; Shane McMahon vs. the Undertaker; and Kalisto vs. Ryback.
- Really, it’s worth watching because it was one of the shittiest ‘Manias of all time, and the worst in recent memory.
- It sets the standard for the pre-taped Wrestlemania next weekend to beat.
- Buddy vs. Duff – 9:00 PM | FOOD
- Buddy Valastro and Duff Goldman conjure up cakes filled with special effects to celebrate the fantasy and fun of Medieval Times’ 30th anniversary.
- Sword fighting, jousts, and royal pageantry inspire them to make two of their most ambitious cakes yet.
- Buddy Valastro and Duff Goldman conjure up cakes filled with special effects to celebrate the fantasy and fun of Medieval Times’ 30th anniversary.
- Spy Wars with Damian Lewis – 8:00 PM | SMITHSONIAN
- The largest surveillance operation in British history is examined by Damian Lewis, who looks at the 2006 joint investigation between MI5, London’s Metropolitan Police Counter-Terrorism Unit, and the CIA to track down a homegrown Al Qaeda cell in east.
- This show has been quite enjoyable.
- Citizen Kane – 8:00 PM | TCM
- After a multimillionaire newspaper magnate utters the mysterious name “Rosebud” on his deathbed, reporters scramble to decipher the word’s meaning, touching off a fascinating series of flashbacks on his life, career and relationships.
- Unironically, Donald Trump’s favorite movie.
I’ll let you know how the return to school tomorrow goes.
Sunday night fun. Spot the Brick!
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=mbA1px56XgM
NAWT HAWT TAEK: Boris Johnson is an absolute piece of monkey turd,and deserves any and all suffering.
Agreed and emphasized.
I recently saw him as a guest on a British motoring program from back when he was first elected mayor of London and he did not seem like the horrible person he has since become.
Yeah, well, look at the Republican Party since Bill Clinton*.
*does not include Redshirt
I’ve talked to Londoners who have said exactly the opposite.
I think a lot of horrible politicians are actually quite nice and engaging outside of the political sphere. There’s a disconnect between policy and personality. Although Jezzer is also a dick.
Agreed; they have to be engaging to their core voters.
Jezza is your dickhead right wing cousin or uncle that’s come over for Thanksgiving. Can tolerate, only because James May.
Day tripped with the fam to Death Valley yesterday. Long day behind the wheel but the mrs got shots of blaxito in a barren wasteland so, in these times, that’s a good use of a Saturday. Was neat to hell and spent today just hanging inside. Back to work tomorrow….
Obligatory.
Also obligatory:
Ook!
Yes, yes. Out acted Reagan.
Just Lurking
I have three important that wfh things to do tomorrow, but luckily none of them involve putting on pants
This is the first week I don’t have at least a half day in the office on Monday before wfh for the rest of the week. Even with the critical infrastructure status, I’m not allowed to report without 24hr notification from my employer. This week is gonna fucking draaaaaaag.
I have three important that WTF things to do tomorrow…….
This is the time of the week when I dread Monday at the office. Now, I can dread facing my BlackBerry pinging all day, and hoping nobody important e-mails me while I’m having my afternoon stress/depression nap.
I had my monthly one-on-one with my supervisor, which generally involves him telling me to stop doing things and me laughing at him, and he said just to make sure I was billing 40 hours a week and I think I laughed harder at that than anything else this year.
BlackBerry? Really.
I just figured King Hippo meant figuratively.
I am writing this from a Blackberry Key 2. All you jokers without physical keyboards can suck whatever it is you would least enjoy sucking on
You were thinking of Bea Arthur’s dick.
Zymm and Hippo walked both ways uphill to school.
Looks fun:
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=V6OberRtI6Q
I think that’s the song that got me into punk. And who could forget this gem, with touching lyrics such as “you gave me head/you made it worse/take out your fucking retainer/put it back in your purse”?
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=uJ7pgElCPXE
This was running through my head the entire time I was vacationing in Cambodia
Episode 5 of Tiger King. Let’s fucking go.
Has Dhalsim made an appearance yet? All I can think of is Tiger! Uppercut!!
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=horFX2IzgOc
SIR. That was actually Sagat, portrayed by the incomparable Wes Studi in the movie.
In the version I had, he was Dhalsim!
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=YuWQwPxsZuE
Wes Studi is fucking great in everything.
I am on the final episode right now.
March has been the longest 3 years of my life.
I’m…I’m afraid to see what April has in store for us.
We’ll probably have a record heat wave in June, and our air conditioners will all break.
According to a well known super genius, it’s going to get hot outside and that will kill the covfefe virus, all problems solved!
Holy cats, this checks out. Glad I ain’t due for a physical anytime soon.
Thanks to Covid-19 my first colostomy got canceled, so I’l probably die of colon cancer by May
Whoa. Colostomy or colonoscopy? There is a big difference.
BIG difference.
FUCK YOU CORONAVIRUS THIS ISN’T FUCKING FUNNY
https://www.rollingstone.com/music/music-news/john-prine-covid-19-symptoms-974909/
I only listened to his 2nd, 3rd, 5th, 7th, 11th, etc., albums
I wonder if there is a musician named Fibonacci.
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=XanjZw5hPvE
And why yes, dear reader, that is in fact noted internet person Chris “Hearst Castle” Hardwick.
Ahem, some cool guy posted something cool below.
Tries to think back in distant memories….. fails, but it seems real.
Shit. He is awesome. Some country music guy just died of the ‘rona. Joe Diffey?
I guess “COVIDCelebrityDeathMatch.com” or something similar has already been registered by some enterprising internet-savvy young man or woman, to apprise us all of who’s dying or not dying. Many clicks coming!
I couldn’t find kittens playing.
final Weekend Reading:
https://www.thecut.com/2020/03/will-the-millennial-aesthetic-ever-end.html
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=3t8H07c30io
Not a fan of the turd people I see.
Five minutes ago: “Hey, cool! They got Kevin Conroy to play an old version of Batman in the live action DC TV show. That’ll be cool to see.”
Narrartor: “Unlike George, Redshirt’s childhood memories didn’t brace themselves for yet another violation.”
If it’s awful you can just tell strangers on the internet how much better things were back in the day
Back in the day, turtles fought ninja robots and ate pizzas, cartoons were on TV every Saturday morning, you could buy a car and a house without putting yourself in crippling debt you could never pay off, Star Wars was only three great movies, baseball was still good because the salaries haven’t exploded up yet, Pete Rose was still an untarnished Baseball God, and Democrats and Republicans were Punch-Clock Villains who went out for beers together after their days were done in Congress.
Oh, and there wasn’t a highly contagious flu-pneumonia virus that was killing every old person except for the Orange Human Hybrid currently inhabiting 1600 Pennsylvania Ave.
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=_6Jlrth2Vc4
Artists conception of me, day 12.
*After the 2016 election.
Me, after the last almost 4 months of isolation. (fun part starts at 1:40)
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=LXL5_tc8UyY
I just saw this cover art for the movie; no wonder it did fairly well at the box……. office in spite of poor reviews.
ppl forget that “Suspiria” is Italian for “hand-speculum”
I mean anything with Dakota Johnson is bound to be good. He is 3rd cousins with Don!
Actually the nephew-in-law of Raymond James Johnson Jr. But ya doesn’t have to call him Ray.
(also, fuck I’m old etc)
Anyone know how BoJo is doing?
He’s too ill to style his hair.
He’s the worst British Prime Minister since Thatcher, so he’s not doing well at all.
True dat.
Why didn’t I know there was a porn actress with the nom de plume of Natalie Porkman?
I mean, that’s just good #BRANDING (TM)
Synergy!
Get me a double bourbon, newbie. Neat.
(I like the new guy.)
All I got me is some Buffalo Trace-hope that passes.
HOOK IT TO MY VEINS
I didn’t know that either, but you have made the life of everyone here richer by sharing. Slainte!
Seems insensitive since she’s Jewish.
No it is not; all of her male co-actors are circumcised.
Surprising she’s thin. Oh, so I’ve been told.
Yarp.
John Prine is in critical condition.
Hey COVID-19: Leave him the fuck alone and go visit Ted Nugent.
I hit the upvote button a lot and now my mouse is broken.
*just for the second part.
Damn tried to link to youtube but I’ve ignored all your tutorials.
Who ?
This guy (hopefully I got it now):
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=w5Rkm_dqm7A&feature=emb_rel_end
Shit there may be and add first, oops.
You got it.
Cool I’m not as incompetent as I thought. Thanks.
I thought there was always an ad first.
Random comment, Viva, but if you dig First you might like the ever expanding Berlin Noir Trilogy by Philip Kerr.
Been there, done that, got the tattoo. Thanks though! I did enjoy.
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Fja9kwTl_jU
Heya. Long time lurker. And bored-ass isolater. Howdy from Canadia (apologies to Moose and Deci for being from Edmonton).
Welcome, here’s your dick joke gift basket.
Gotta bring your own dick.
ummmm, thanks?
We’re here to help. And drink. And molest collies. But mostly help.
https://y.yarn.co/2911a9d5-d275-4e0e-a2ff-7c45bc89e39d.mp4?1585529390647
You see when I first got here they didn’t give out Dick Baskets. I was told to eat a Bag of Dicks.
That just shows how much money DFO is making from “royalties.”
You can send someone a bag of dicks to eat, they’re gummi
All the colours of the rainbow!
You GOT to be hungry; we only found one good place to eat in about ten multi-day trips there. Please join in.
Eating off the curbside now.
Finally, a new movie about lobbyists.
Don Knotts was awesome
Atta boy, Luther!
Enjoying this. I remember reading an article about this guy in a NatGeo book called Great Adventures when I was a child. Then I actually met Kittinger out at Holloman AFB back in about 2013. I was thrilled to death.
https://www.pbs.org/wgbh/americanexperience/films/spacemen/
Edit:
I forgot to mention: dude is a fucking badass. https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Joseph_Kittinger
At first glance I thought that one book was call The Anatomy of Anuses.
With the other titles, I believe that one is just out of frame.
You rang?
Seriously though; this is also pretty good:
https://www.goodreads.com/book/show/1925393.Fifty_Years_Below_Zero
Found a funny:
How are people with secret families handling this?
1) These are always SO GOOD, rockingdog – thank you for your clubhouse contributions
2) Can you use the same “fake death” scenario twice?
My company has a contract with a multinational corporation that has expats working in different countries. Apparently a lot of them have two families because some of the countries have a much lower cost of living. Fun times.
I just can NOT get Nicaragua right, not even ONCE. Almost like gambling isn’t a great idea.
just kidding GAMBLOR, I would NEVAR buhlee DAT
Those damn Zombeavers
*Radioactive Rats
I took the home teams Jalapa and Walter. 25 dollar parlay. Need Jalapa to hold on.
Also “Someone’s in the kitchen with Dina”
or is that the phrase meaning anal.
-Europe
I just can NOT get Nicaragua right, not even ONCE
—Ronald Reagan and Oliver North.
Nice.
well, Reagan Smash! kept forgetting…
Good marketing can overcome a questionable product.
Woo, baby. That’s a take and a half.
I note that no journalistic news organizations find this the least bit credible. It’s a Putin fan, being egged on by other Putin Fans (Glenn Greenwald) and the Q-anon types.
See above.
But I guess we have 2020’s “Pizzagate” already.
I go back to saying, thank fuck our nominee is generally likable, because this shitstorm of mud was coming for anyone (good to have someone it won’t stick to as badly as HillyBob)
my point isn’t about whether or not it’s true. It’s that there are an unfortunate number of people going out of their way to say they’d vote for him even if it is, which is some crazy shit to sign your name to.
Agreed. And I didn’t mean to infer that YOU would believe it.
/people are terrible
Which rapist would you vote for? Trump has done all the inherited rich man shit. But yeah, that’s also fucked up. Kinda like the christian right making Trump “god’s gift.”
If it was proven, I wouldn’t vote. I’m not going to put myself in a position that I have to rationalize voting for a person like that either way.
If it was proven he should be indicted, if possible. If beyond the SoL he should be sued into oblivion. If proven he would not be elected. That Trump has not had this happen long ago shows what various justice systems are all about. But the GOP has no regard for proof; as Hippo says, these are the same people who brought you Pizzagate.
Saying he wouldn’t get elected because of it shows more faith in the electorate than I have. More likely he wouldn’t for the reasons I think it’s more perilous than most: Voters under 40 being at best indifferent towards him, boring politics, and a psychotic legion of zealots powering the incumbent. Also, a media industry that prefers to give attention to someone like Trump despite whatever politics they espouse. Ratings and clicks at any cost.
Well, agreed, but I think if there was much evidence at all it would be the daily output. The voters under 40 are how Trump got elected in the first place and that would keep them home again. But I agree; it does not take much to keep those people home; the non-voters beat either candidate by a landslide.
It’s almost like voting frequently involves picking the lesser of two evils or something…
That’s actually an interesting question, what would Biden have to be guilty of for me to consider Trump the lesser evil? And with what degree of certainty?
He’d have to kill a dozen babies on live TV. Even then, I would wonder about the babies’ motives.
In this country just throwing shit out there and repeating it is enough.
At this point, I don’t know if I consider either the lesser evil by themselves, but we saw the mutants trump threw in his administration when he was actually concerned with getting re-elected, and at some point, I have to come to the conclusion that I’d prefer to not have an administration stacked with literal Hitler clones.
Joe Biden is very flawed, but he’s a good man and will try (at least)
Hey, hey heeeeeeeeeeeeey, a bunch of those guys put their industry interests and selling the country out way above their nazi leanings.
“FUCK THESE MOUNTAINS!”
— Coal companies throughout Appalachia since 1840
https://www.imdb.com/title/tt1649578/
I don’t watch a lot of TV shows, but that one was fucking brilliant.
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=cco-pCb0klU
Goddamned Juventus Managua (guess that’s the “Aldi clearance rack” varietal of Juventus) – just score one fucking soccer point and cash my Draw!
/fuck you, YOU have a problem
Octo-Mom?
Some people are getting a bit bored.
My parents had a set of those wine glasses when I was growing up. Hell, they probably still have them. Had me a drink or two of Mateus Rose out of them, back in the day.
This challenges everything I know about the relative density of vitreous humor and alcohol
see, this is why you always want a Doktor in teh house
Another blanket party for Pvt Pyle…
It’s only brandy.
I hear tell she’s a fine girl
Wish I could upvote Vitreous Humor a thousand times.
Vitreous is the funniest of the eye humors.
I just pulled out and wiped down my rice maker that I haven’t used in the past 2+ years then went hunting in my cabinets for rice. I had a 15 pound bag that apparently was not sealed well cause all bugs and mold got in it. I’ve got brown rice and risotto rice that’s okay though so I’m good. I also started looking at expiration dates on other stuff. I’m willing to be careful with liquid stuff like cartons of stock, but no way will I believe that dried pasta expires. On the fence about stuff like hamburger helper seasoning packets, but should be fine?
I also took the trash out and there was a bunch of expired cans of chef boyardee and soup, so apparently I’m not to only one plumbing the depths of my cupboard!
OK, I’m not going to lie. When I read “pulled out and wiped down” I almost stopped reading that comment.
Let’s just say that brown rice didn’t start out brown.
I am also getting confused by these new euphemisms.
Seasoning packets should be ok. It’s usually when liquid is involved that you need to watch dates.
That’s the general guideline I’m following, although the ‘refrigerate after opening’ couscous is throwing me for a bit of a loop
Most spices and shit will just get less flavorful with time, no matter how well sealed. Except for that one spice that becomes extremely lethal, but I can’t remember which one it is…
“Rice Maker.”
I though rice was “made” in rice paddies in tropical or sub-tropical climates around the world.
Well, it DOES take up most of her closet.
Rice cooker? Crockpot with rice setting?
Sorry, being bored makes me pedantic.
Jalapa is up 1-0. It’s the only sports! However I can bet on table tennis and watch it live on my internet bookie site.
Table tennis from where?
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=wvJ4wh1kwR8
Hot ‘n’ Sexy monsters.
Russia. Its Yansahiev v Nikiforov.
/Hippo masturbates furiously
Wiggling of ears is a lost art.
Where’s the tWBS redheaded kid when you need him?
hehehehe
Is that a photo from where you are? Because if so, Trump’s Hurricane Maria response has apparently been as awesome as he has been saying all along.
The test results are in, and it turns out I am approximately 40% Pringle at this stage of the quarantine. Experts say the number could go up, before it goes down.
Lemurs are assholes.
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=sun1x0ANt-Y
(sobbing) That’s how my father went out!
Watching something I stumbled upon on Amazon Prime called Wheels of Power: History of Official Cars. Featured autos include Hitler’s Mercedes 770K, DeGaulle’s Citroen Traction and DS-19, the Popemobiles of various popes, and the US President’s Cadillac known as The Beast, built for Obama and used by Trump as well. I can’t believe that Trump uses it, because that black guy sat in it.
I am out here bbqing and I just saw a drug deal sitch. Dude drives up to other apartment drops off bottle of Spiced Rum drives away. 20 secs later dude comes down and grabs his rum. Beautiful.
Shhhhhhh…. Snitches get stitches.
I just got some Indian food the exact same way
Am I the only one who wants the big cat to turn and bite him in the neck?
No but I recognize the difficulty of photoshop violence.
I don’t believe Donald Trump has the attention span to sit through a 10 minute infomercial about Mar-a-Lago or the Trump Tower, let alone a complete two hour movie.
(Five seconds into Citizen Kane):
“Rich guy, millionaire, media guy, likee me, rich, successful, handsome, I love it.”
(Signs off on tearing down a rent controlled apartment building of war widows and replace it with luxury condos for rich foreigners)
“Best movie ever”
(Leaves to drop off the hookers before they run into his pregnant wife)
[Tweets voraciously about lamestream media guy Kane]
“Newspaper owners like Bezos and Kane are enemies of the people!”
Louie gotz some boots.
But he can’t see nuthin’.
Thought about buying some yeast at the store today in case things get a little desperate in the beer department, but it was all gone already! You animals!
At least people still have their art.
Part I like best is the guy’s argyle socks.
Gotta look good; socks will show when yer hangin’.
They’re truly to die for.
I wish there were a Buddy Cole podcast
I did like 3 hours of productive stuff today, time to bust out the fizzy wine and read the new Erik Larson book
On my list of books to buy once the bookstores reopen.
My Kindle is paying for itself all over again, I still read paper books but ebooks are a game changer for travel and for lockdowns it seems
I have this and the new Emily St. John Mandel waiting.
I just bought her first book, should I bump it to the top of the queue?
all her books are fantastic (after “Station Eleven” I ordered everything else she wrote, I couldn’t put any of them down until I finished), she is easily my favourite author now
Well, under the new work from home directive, I have at least figured out that the only real difference between a work day and a weekend day is that I don’t feel as guilty about starting to drink at 9 AM on Saturdays or Sundays. Thing that pisses me off is that if I am on VPN for work email, this is a forbidden site.
Went to HEB today, no big crowds, a few things not on the shelves. Scored a 2-pack of cheap-ass store brand paper towels, last package on the shelf. There was some ass-wipe in the paper shelves as well, though I’ve already got plenty so I didn’t bag any of that. Had to go with 12-pack of 12-oz cans of my Cherry Coke Zero mixer since no 2-liter bottles were on display. I wish HEB was running things in Washington, they certainly have their shit more together than the Trump Administration.
Oooh some of that Puerto Rican paper towel.
I saw a gif that I can’t find right now of him throwing the roll of paper towels, but someone had shopped in a pic of the covfefevirus germ over the roll of paper towels.
Any school that re-opens before next fall will be re-closing in short order.
Yup, and that’s why most tech companies will be WFH for at least the next couple months. There’s enough people with kids that we won’t be going back to the office until schools are back, or summer camps or whatever
Looking at Liberty University. This could end up as a great culling of the non-science-believing right wing herd.
Fuck the economy, for that I might be willing to sacrifice myself.
I know I’ll sound like a callous asshole, but that whole thing is fucking great. Those assholes deserve everything they get.
/does not want a callus on his asshole
Well, hot peppers can also…..
That will be the part I will most enjoy.
https://www.rawstory.com/2020/03/florida-residents-pack-into-megachurch-after-pastor-promises-he-can-cure-coronavirus/
It’s like the antivaxxers though, it’s all fun and games until it spreads to non-awful people
Except they’re going to kill all of us as well
There’s always a flaw in every great plan.