Your “Completely Hobo-Free” Sunday Night Football Open Thread

Look, it was about time they got a break and besides, as a literary genre it is a bit self-limiting, don’t cha think? Also, it’s Thanksgiving and we are supposed to think about the less fortunate. Or was that Arbour Day? I get things mixed up here and there. Fear not, we’ll have some ‘psychopath on hobo action’ soon enough but for now we’ll have to content ourselves with the last game of the night on offer.

TO THE GAME!

Vikes/Seahawks:

-Give Brian Shottenheimer some credit for adjusting the Seahawks offensive identity. That ‘we will run you into the ground’ mentality was wearing a bit thin and became increasingly easy to game plan for. (it also made my ‘no-brainer’ Chris Carson pick-you know he’s going to get all kinds of touches if he’s healthy-look a bit sillier than I’d thought).

-Yeah, the team that ran the 9th-most run plays last year has now dropped all the way to 22nd.

-Vastly under-appreciated qb Wilson took the task to heart and has responded with a performance through the first quarter of the season that not many saw coming. Will he cook for Zeke? The question remains unanswered.

-Speaking of qb’s, what’s up with Kirkie? His PFF passing grade thru the first three quarters of each game is 66.5 but then he revs it up to 87.1 in the fourth. It’s attributed to the team having to play catchup but there’s something else going on as well.

-That thing is that he leads the league in average depth of target at 12.1, meaning he makes his longer strikes count but they come in the last 12 minutes of the game. Maybe do something earlier, guy who draws up the plays?

Do what you do best, just try to not get it on your monitor.

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Doktor Zymm

Can the Oceanic Raptors only score if they do it in one drive?

Brocky

ha collinsworth had to stop himself from saying “oakland”

King Hippo

Liked this fixture better when I was barely paying attention, and Dingleberry was fucking up.

rockingdog

found a funny:

Putting a bell around a cow’s neck to circumvent its stealthiness is just wrong. I say let them hunt.

King Hippo

As a crazy cat person, I get and highly approve of this yuk-yuk

Viva La Tabula Raza

My chow mix got a goat bell when she started killing deer out in the yard. I hated cleaning that mess up.

Unsurprised

Plus, you know, exposure to Lyme Disease

Brocky

the vikings have a tackle named Riley Reiff, sounds a lot like another name, so here u go

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Unsurprised

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Brocky

I like her scene where she’s the yoga instructor

Recovery Whiskey

I’m amazed clothed pics of her exist

Last edited 4 years ago by Recovery Whiskey
Unsurprised

She has an Instagram account. No nipples, no holes below the Equator.

WCS

Why do I get the feeling the Vikes are going to fuck this up?

King Hippo

You haven’t fully killed the “hope” cells of your brain?

Brocky

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Unsurprised

Inside the brain of Blair Walsh

Doktor Zymm

Hey, turns out I know someone on a billboard!

Horatio Cornblower

Pfft! Half my clients are prominently featured at the Post Office.

Viva La Tabula Raza

Need to stop multi-posting.

Last edited 4 years ago by Viva La Tabula Raza
Brocky

do those Jerseys represent covid deaths?

King Hippo

Dingleberry QB sneak is a very sad thing.

Doktor Zymm

It would be better if he wore a trenchcoat and dark glasses, far more sneaky

Viva La Tabula Raza

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Horatio Cornblower

There’s no way he wasn’t the worst motivational coach ever.

Brocky

please I do not need a god damned shootout to wreck my fantasy matchup

Doktor Zymm

Vikings are more into pillaging with axes than firearms

King Hippo

Killing with an axe takes a lot MOAR skill. I almost think axe murdering should be legal, just so ppl up their game.

King Hippo

IN-COM-PLETE!!!!

/wrong team but FUCK IT

BrettFavresColonoscopy

Do you think DK could score three more times? That would mean I’d only need like 30 points from Josh Kelley to win.

Unsurprised

They’re opening a Chipotle across the street from my office in a building that was a closed-down Carl’s Jr. (closed for a while, too). That’s like a stab in the heart of not only the taco truck parked on the other side of the McDonald’s, but to the 60% of (small) businesses that are gone forever because this country fucking sucks shit.

WCS

It’s Chipotle, so half their customers will get food poisoning within two weeks.

Unsurprised

Small mercies

King Hippo

All I know of Chipotle (ALL Mexican food gives me migraines, because FUCK MY BRAIN) is that it smells like a bum’s asshole.

Horatio Cornblower

Keep going to the taco truck, encourage your friends to go to the taco truck, and if all else fails, look into the cleansing power of a good grease fire.

Unsurprised

This isn’t the first time I’ve ideated about how to burn down a Chipotle.

King Hippo

I go let the cat out, grab a ginger beer…and is 21-13 already.

JimU

The Vikings right now.

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Doktor Zymm

One handed catches are always impressive, even moreso when it’s an INT

King Hippo

You see that Hump linebacker make an acrobatic pick today, despite having one taped-up “club” hand?

Doktor Zymm

Saw replay and dude should get a bonus

Mr. Ayo

HOX woke up.

Recovery Whiskey

Carson HEYYYYOOOO

litre_cola

Oh primetime Cousins shows up!

Unsurprised

I should take off tomorrow in protest. This is horseshit.

litre_cola

Start using more U’s in your words and say you are from up here!

Unsurprised

I don’t need to pretend,

(It’s Indigenous People’s Day tomorrow. State employees don’t get tomorrow off.).

Last edited 4 years ago by Unsurprised
King Hippo

They should at least play “Beds Are Burning” on constant loop, eh?

Viva La Tabula Raza

The drum solo at 2:41 on that song is the shortest, most intense drum solo in the history of recorded music.

King Hippo

is pretty tight, musically speaking. I didn’t properly appreciate the same at the time.

Viva La Tabula Raza

A very under-appreciated band on this side of the Pacific. Nice 25 year career, went on hiatus over 15 years ago, recently got back together and are working on a new album; couple songs already released.

Gumbygirl

That’s one I put on full blast when it comes on Sirius! Banger.

Doktor Zymm

Hourseshite!

Recovery Whiskey

Cousins face

WCS

A USUAL KIRK COUSINS APPEARS

WHAT WILL YOU DO

Recovery Whiskey

KJ with the pick

King Hippo

Man, I notice the game is back, but before I even work up the energy to find the remote (for sound), is already 14-13. LET RUSS USE TEH MICROWAVE.

hippofant

LET RUSS DEFROST

King Hippo

Dunno how I will manage to work in ceviche but will TRY

Doktor Zymm

LET RUSS HARNESS THE CHEMICAL REACTIVE POWERS OF ACIDIC CITRUS

King Hippo

see, this is why they made u DOKTOR

Rikki-Tikki-Deadly

The first girl voted off looks quietly enraged. It’s like she’s currently plotting her revenge.

Rikki-Tikki-Deadly

YOU VILL PAY!

Viva La Tabula Raza
Last edited 4 years ago by Viva La Tabula Raza
Doktor Zymm

That already makes it sound more interesting than most singing type shows

Rikki-Tikki-Deadly

The first few rounds they all have to vote for a contestant to drop. Except the best singer gets a bye. It’s actually a pretty good format.

Game Time Decision

Not in those shoes

WCS

Okay, that was a hell of a pass from Charmslinger.

BrettFavresColonoscopy

I never believed he was underrated but legit think he somehow is

Recovery Whiskey

Thats a fumble

Mr. Ayo

Should have been a TD too. Stupid Refs.

Recovery Whiskey

These refs blow faster than Trump with Stormy.

Brocky

blew faster than my dad working on that water line.

seriously, it went zero to a hundred so quick

Rikki-Tikki-Deadly

We watched an entire season of “Sing On” in Spanish. Now we’re watching the German version.

Rikki-Tikki-Deadly

The scoring algorithm for the German version is much more strict, unsurprisingly.

BrettFavresColonoscopy

This Canada-centric view of ThanksgOUiving needs to be stopped

The Maestro

Counterpoint: no.

litre_cola

Had turkey last night, ham and cabbage rolls tonight. Pumpkin Pie and red wine both nights! Huzzah!

King Hippo

I don’t think y’all really killed enough natives to earn teh rite 2 celebrate smh

Doktor Zymm

I just wish we got days off work for both versions

Rikki-Tikki-Deadly

Fireworks going off here in LA.

I hate the Lakers, but I can live with this. At least Miami didn’t embarrass themselves, and I don’t mind LeBron’s legacy growing.

BrettFavresColonoscopy

Actual fireworks or gunshots?

ballsofsteelandfury

A little column A and a little column B. Depends on your neighborhood.

Last edited 4 years ago by ballsofsteelandfury
ballsofsteelandfury

I hear them too. We need to ban fucking fireworks like NOW.

I wonder how many stupid fires will get started with this bullshit…

Doktor Zymm

Too bad we can’t literally douse the Heat from fires with some sort of giant Lake

yeah right

Yeah it’s noisy as fuck over here.
I’m cool with the season results.

WCS

Vikes are going to suck the souls from Yeah Right and Drew again.

Unsurprised

Sucks for Yeah right, but Magary can pound sand

herodotus450

Yeah but what if they’re, like, doing that reverse physiology thing?

rockingdog

decent chance LA might be going off
first Lakers win another title then LA Dodgers win a world series?

ballsofsteelandfury

Meanwhile, the Kings look off into the distance, staring at the sunset and looking down.

WCS

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I’m sorry, did someone get addicted to winning championships all the time?

ballsofsteelandfury

Two championships in the existence of the team is not exactly all the time…

Brocky

lol, kings won a Stanley cup six years ago and they’re almost an afterthought. still say paulina was the only good thing about that team

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Unsurprised

Wouldn’t the L.A. contingent be having a much better time at the Armenian protests?

ballsofsteelandfury

There are some pretty fine-looking Armenian ladies, I’ll tell you that…

Unsurprised

Indeed

Doktor Zymm

I was sitting on a bench in Yerevan when an Armenian lady started chatting to me trying to convince me I should marry her son. I wouldn’t mind the dual citizenship, but still glad I didn’t go for it.

The Maestro

Starting to think this LeBron James fellow might have some skill at the game of basketball.

Brocky

oof. person in my fantasy league who started cook also started Prescott

Doktor Zymm

At least Dalvin looks like he just pulled his groin

yeah right

Any of you other Angelenos feeling the city buzz? Lakers are crushing right now and this town might get crazy. Think I’ll finish this game before switching back to football.

ballsofsteelandfury

It’s my lady friend’s vibrator. I got her the corded one. Never get the cordless, it’s a waste of money.

Viva La Tabula Raza

But if that’s a WAP you are dealing with, you have the electrocution risk if it’s plugged into the wall. Unless you use GFI.

rockingdog

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Mr. Ayo

I appreciate MIN’s tribute to the SEA offense by killing the cook.

litre_cola

She has a Mina Kimes vibe to her.

Mr. Ayo

Dimitroff out too. Full house cleaning in the ATL.

litre_cola

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JimU

Crap, I got 28-3 odds that Quinn was going to be the first coach fired.

Sharkbait

Not the first time Atlanta burned it to the ground

Unsurprised

Always deserved

Recovery Whiskey

Seattle offense can’t do dick

yeah right

That was a very complete and satisfactory first half. Let’s stay focused guys, lots of time still out there.
Second week in a row without wearing team colors. I’m onto something.

Doktor Zymm

LOL, MADD is in favor of Prop 22

Unsurprised

That totally makes sense. Lyft and Uber fill a lot of needs as far as transportation goes and as far as reducing DUIs. That still doesn’t change that they are shit employers.

Last edited 4 years ago by Unsurprised
ballsofsteelandfury

What I don’t understand is why the taxi companies haven’t embraced the technology. I mean, if I could summon a cab with an app and know that the driver has been through a screening process and is paid a decent wage with benefits, that would be wonderful!

Doktor Zymm

They sorta did in some markets. What we’re gonna end up with is basically the same thing. Uber/Lyft will go to a franchise model and the middlemen aka franchise owners will play the same role as the cab operators used to.

BrettFavresColonoscopy

RIP HailO. What a terrible app.

hippofant

Fragmentation. Taxi companies, generally, only operate in individual cities, so few, if any, can afford the capital investment for a high-quality app and the infrastructure to run it.

Furthermore, many taxi companies are varieties of coops or franchises etc, which makes it even harder for them to do something, because the company itself is strongly decentralized with many “owners” who are just getting by day-to-day with their licenses.

hippofant

Taxi companies, generally, only operate in individual cities, so few, if any, can afford the capital investment for a high-quality app and the infrastructure to run it.

Fuck, let’s be real, Uber and Lyft can’t really afford it either. Even with their economies of scale, working worldwide and doing stuff like Uber Eats and such, they’re still hemorrhaging money. They’re just running on VC money.

ballsofsteelandfury

Yup. They’re spending HUGE amounts of money on this Prop 22. If it fails, they are going to go out of business soon.

ballsofsteelandfury

There’s a reason right there to vote against it!

Doktor Zymm

MADD originally used their lobbying power to push for making federal highway maintenance funds contingent on states raising their drinking age to 21. It was a Constitutionally sketchy move that opened the door to a lot of federal overreach that we see today. I still view them with suspicion and I find it hilarious that they’re still viewed as a desirable endorsement to have.

ballsofsteelandfury

I agree. They’re like PETA. They may have started out with good intentions, but some things they do are mighty sketchy.

Unsurprised

Thus always to opposition groups. Eventually they will do anything to justify their continued existence.

The Maestro

<blockquote class=”twitter-tweet”><p lang=”en” dir=”ltr”>drunk driving may kill a lot of people, but it also helps a lot of people get to work on time, so, it;s impossible to say if its bad or not,</p>&mdash; wint (@dril) <a href=”https://twitter.com/dril/status/464802196060917762?ref_src=twsrc%5Etfw”>May 9, 2014</a></blockquote> <script async src=”https://platform.twitter.com/widgets.js” charset=”utf-8″></script>

Unsurprised

Goddamnit. That’s basically the Simpsons joke about lowering the speed limit to 55.

55? That’s ridiculous.

Sure, that will save a few lives

but millions will be late.

Last edited 4 years ago by Unsurprised
Unsurprised

Fact

<blockquote class=”twitter-tweet”><p lang=”en” dir=”ltr”>Driving drunk has become a lost art.</p>&mdash; LB Shore (@shorepatrol) <a href=”https://twitter.com/shorepatrol/status/876010976813961216?ref_src=twsrc%5Etfw”>June 17, 2017</a></blockquote> https://platform.twitter.com/widgets.js

Gumbygirl

My scallopped taters are getting there! When they’re done I’m pan frying a ham steak and making a sauce with butter, blueberry jam, and a smidge of the garlic better than bouillon. Feeling fancy!

yeah right

Do you use cheese or just heavy cream?
I love gruyere in my potatoes. Like to finish with some freshly grated parm on top as well.

Gumbygirl

I did put some shredded cheddar in tonight, but I don’t always. I make a white sauce, if I just use cream it doesn’t get thick enough. The pan sauce for the ham is the best thing, I’m looking forward to it! Maybe some steamed green beans, if I get around to it.

Sharkbait

That sounds amazing!

Unsurprised

GOD DAMN

Doktor Zymm

Add a bunch more weeks, have the Superb Owl in April

Doktor Zymm
Rikki-Tikki-Deadly

Is there any better indicator that the NFL season is doomed to be canceled after another two weeks than the fact that the Browns are 4-1?

Viva La Tabula Raza

Plus, Bills 4-0.

The Maestro

When you look at what this team is now, it’s absolutely WILD to think that Hue Jackson got as long of a leash as he did.

WCS

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